Chapter 679: See How They'll Handle It

The string and bamboo music in the hall continued as before, the dancers' silk sleeves still fluttering nonstop.

However, the sound of toasting was gone, and the murmuring whispers also disappeared.

Instead, the hall was full of people sitting, yet they maintained an eerie silence.

The officials lowered their heads, still picking up dishes and drinking, but their movements were stiff as puppets.

Like sitting on pins and needles.

The eunuchs and palace maids' hands trembled slightly; they dared not shuttle dishes anymore.

Chen Wang and Qing Wang spoke a moment longer, then lifted their eyes to the table, their faces darkening: "Why only deer tendon? Weren't bear paws also prepared for the officials today? Why weren't they served?"

Sheng Zhan rose, adjusted his cap and robes: "Your Highness, it's late; this old official is frail with age, I dare not drink further."

"The revelry in this hall is more than this old official can bear; I'll take my leave first."

Having said that, he didn't wait for Chen Wang and Qing Wang to speak, and walked straight out of the great hall.

Chen Wang and Qing Wang glanced at each other, both showing displeasure.

Shortly after, several censors also rose to take their leave.

The officials glanced at one another; none wanted to stay another moment.

They rose one after another:

"Your Highnesses still have morning court tomorrow; we dare not delay your rest!"

"Yes, yes, Your Highness labors over state affairs; your health is paramount!"

"We take our leave!"

Chen Wang waved his hand, stood up, and said impatiently: "Never mind, never mind, just disperse."

"I'm returning to my residence as well." Qing Wang also rose, his head heavy with drink, swaying slightly.

The officials, as if granted a pardon, hurriedly bowed and stepped out, their robes fluttering, wishing they could cross the threshold of Taiji Hall in a single stride.

Soon, everyone had withdrawn from the great hall.

After the feast, only the eunuchs and palace maids remained, their faces pale as they cleared the tables.

Tuan Tuan had already fallen asleep.

Xiao Er felt relieved, suppressing a laugh as he carried her out through the west side gate and leapt onto the roof.

Lu Qi watched them return safely, his heart easing, and asked softly: "Why were you gone so long? What did you hear?"

"I'll tell you later," Xiao Er wanted to burst out laughing but could only hold it in: "What a grand show!"

"What grand show?" Lu Qi glanced at his back, "Did you even lull the miss to sleep?"

"Come on, we can't miss the Imperial Kitchen tonight; let's first go to the Leng Gong to fetch Chen Hao and the others."

"All right."

The two returned silently to the dry well of the Leng Gong; Chen Hao and Xiao Ran, who had been waiting in the well, heard their voices and sprang out, cradling Xiao Feifei.

Seeing Tuan Tuan, Xiao Feifei wanted to dart over, chirping eagerly, but Xiao Ran quickly covered its mouth: "Wait until we reach the Imperial Kitchen to call, you little fox spirit."

Xiao Feifei glanced at the soundly sleeping Tuan Tuan and obediently shut its mouth.

Xiao Erdao said: "The palace banquet just ended; the Imperial Kitchen is in chaos now, so let's first find an empty room to wait in."

The four searched the Leng Gong and entered an empty room.

Lu Qi took Tuan Tuan into his arms and sat beside the bed.

Xiao Er removed his outer robe and gently draped it over Tuan Tuan.

Xiao Feifei crept over and lay still beside Tuan Tuan's feet.

After waiting over half an hour, they finally set out for the Imperial Kitchen.

In its sleep, Tuan Tuan twitched its little nose, opened its eyes, and exclaimed: "How fragrant!"

Xiao Ran widened its eyes: "Little one, you're amazing—waking up just from smelling it!"

Tuan Tuan rubbed its eyes: "Big Brother Nine?"

"Uncle Two," she looked at Xiao Er, "is the palace banquet over?"

"It's long over!" Xiao Er laughed, lifting Xiao Feifei to her face: "Miss, it only listens to you—just like last time, let the fox immortal lure the people out."

"All right!" Tuan Tuan hugged Xiao Feifei and gave it a kiss, then pointed to the Imperial Kitchen: "Xiao Feifei, just like last time, go!"

Xiao Feifei leapt from her arms to the ground, kicked up its little legs, and charged inside.

Soon, the eunuchs came running after Xiao Feifei, which had a fish dangling from its mouth.

Several people darted inside.

After a quick, familiar search, they returned to the secret chamber via the hidden passage.

When the steaming imperial dishes filled the tables, everyone froze.

Just the bear paws alone numbered six! The deer tendons filled an entire large crock.

The variety of other mountain delicacies and seafood was so great that a single table couldn't hold them all.

"The palace banquet really is different!" Feng Zhou exclaimed, "So many fine things!"

Eunuch Cheng, however, felt a pang of regret: "It's all the Emperor's money!"

"Dig in!" Xiao Ningyuan called with a smile: "They're feasting in Taiji Hall; we here mustn't shortchange ourselves either!"

Everyone gathered around, chopsticks still unmoved, Xiao Ran already impatient: "Hurry up and tell us—what exactly did you hear?"

Xiao Er set down his cup, cleared his throat, and laid out everything he had heard in Taiji Hall today, point by point.

Item by item, matter by matter, the listeners were left gaping.

Xiao Ningyuan's face filled with disbelief: "Not a single person reminded them?"

Xiao Er laughed: "Even his own son warned him, and got shouted down—who'd dare speak up after that?"

"Truly despicable!" Feng Zhou fumed, slamming his chopsticks onto the table.

Xiao Er finally could laugh out loud: "Hahaha! The best part is, they thought they were whispering, but actually the whole court heard it."

Xiao Ran was delighted: "I just want to know what Sheng Zhan looked like back then."

Xiao Er curled his lip: "Sheng Zhan was the first to stand up and ask to leave, his face turned green."

"What about those censors?"

"Their faces were as dark as iron, it felt like thorns growing under their buttocks, they couldn't sit."

Everyone burst into laughter.

"And Li Jing, his face turned black at that time."

Xiao Ningyuan shook his head, laughing: "Li Jing came from the Imperial Examination (Imperial Examination (Imperial Examination (Keju))); after his remark, he'd be reduced to begging."

"Now it's done; from today on, the two Regent Kings and the officials are completely estranged."

"One's master is always scheming this and that; who knows when it might turn on oneself?"

"Exactly!" Feng Zhou laughed, slapping the table: "They still thought they were so clever, but in the end their underpants were exposed to all!"

Eunuch Cheng laughed till tears: "I've served in the Palace for so many years, this is the first time I've seen such liveliness."

Everyone laughed together.

Xiao Ran suddenly turned his head, looking at Tuan Tuan feeding bear paws to Xiao Feifei: "Little one, how did you think of this? You actually came up with such a method!"

Tuan Tuan blinked: "They were talking about Chen Hao! I just wanted everyone to know how wronged Chen Hao is."

She gestured with her oily little hand: "So I made sure everyone heard it! Who knows what else they said afterwards!"

The secret chamber fell silent for a moment.

Afterward, the laughter grew louder.

Chen Hao looked at Tuan Tuan, eyes glinting: "Thank you, Tuan Tuan."

"This is truly a four‑ounce move that deflects a thousand catties!" Lu Qi raised his thumb.

Xiao Er smiled, patting Tuan Tuan's head: "Miss, this move of yours is more effective than a hundred thousand troops."

Xiao Ran wiped his tears from laughing: "I dare bet that when they go back tonight, those officials won't be able to sleep."

"Not just unable to sleep," Xiao Ningyuan laughed, "they'll probably have to ponder in their dreams whether those two princes still remember what they said tomorrow."

"What if they remember?" Lu Qi drawled, "the whole court heard it—how could you possibly silence everyone?"

"They could try to cover it up," Eunuch Cheng said with a smile, "but they can't stop everyone from hearing it! People in the Palace love to gossip."

Feng Zhou gnawed on a bear paw, mumbling: "I just want to know how those two Regent Kings will face the officials at tomorrow's morning court."

Xiao Ran laughed loudly: "That would be too lively! Hahaha!"

"Not explaining is tantamount to admitting guilt; explaining would probably not be believed either—see what they do!"

After eating and drinking their fill, everyone fell asleep contentedly.

The next day, the two Regent Kings did not appear at the morning court.

They had slept until noon before rushing to Zichen Hall.

The Masked Man first gave them a sharp look: "Order the Imperial Guard outside the Guoshi Residence to dig!"