Chapter 62: Leaving

All night long, Yang Yi tossed and turned, unable to fall into a deep sleep; past memories kept surfacing incessantly. When awake, she could empty her mind and force herself not to think, but in moments of blurred consciousness, in the limbo between sleep and wakefulness, in the gaps of dreamy confusion, she could not control it.

When she woke in the morning, she felt her head swelling, her mind heavy and foggy.

Fortunately, she had eaten a "earthy-flavored" little sweet treat last night, which suppressed the frequent hunger pangs that had been plaguing her recently, preventing things from getting even worse.

She washed her face with cold water, trying to regain her senses. Having dealt with the Brain-Eating Beast last night, she was leaving Wuming City today to head to Shu Province to resolve another A-level threat; she needed to keep a clear mind and rational logic to face whatever lay ahead.

As soon as she opened the door, she saw Chen Chen Huanyue waiting outside, and her expression froze in surprise.

Chen Chen Huanyue did not know how long he had been waiting outside; his face looked weary, with dark circles under his eyes and bloodshot whites. Leaning against the doorframe, he unconsciously smoked a cigarette, his expression blurred amidst the curling blue smoke.

Yang Yi looked down at his feet; quite a few cigarette butts had already been discarded there.

He had never smoked before, nor had he ever littered. A thought flashed through Yang Yi's mind, but it quickly vanished.

Only when Yang Yi stood before him did he sluggishly come to his senses, realizing it was not an illusion. He hurriedly dropped the cigarette butt on the ground, awkwardly stomped it out with his foot, and seeing the floor covered in butts, he frantically explained: "I'll have them clean it up properly..."

"It's your hotel anyway," Yang Yi said indifferently.

After a moment of silence, just before Yang Yi was about to speak, he asked in a low voice: "You're leaving, aren't you?"

"Yes, the crisis in Wuming City has been resolved, and there is work elsewhere."

"Yes, I know. The threat in Shu Province is also A-level." Chen Chen Huanyue unconsciously reached into his pocket for another cigarette, but realizing Yang Yi was right there, he awkwardly withdrew his hand.

"Do you know? I personally fought for the qualification to host Awakened ones at this hotel this time, because I heard you were coming..."

Yang Yi had already anticipated this. Lihao Hotel was a chain, with locations in major cities across the country and even abroad. Why had he inexplicably come to manage a hotel in Wuming City, a third-tier city? Moreover, it was so dangerous here.

With a bit of narcissism, one could guess the reason: perhaps it was for her. After all, rumors had already spread in Wuming City that Yang Yi would come to resolve the crisis of abnormal creatures here.

Yang Yi remained silent; she did not know what to say.

She thought the past was past; she had barely managed to force those memories to the bottom of her sea of consciousness, yet now he had dragged them up again, and she almost hated him for it.

Chen Chen Huanyue finally mustered his courage, lifted his head to gaze at her, staring into those eyes that had appeared countless times in his memories, now looking somewhat blurred: "Give me an answer. Seeing me with my cousin was just an excuse you made up, an untenable excuse."

When he said "Give me an answer," it seemed he was not asking for a reason, but rather saying, "I still love you, please look at me."

He almost hated his own wretched appearance right now. Why was he so undignified? Why couldn't he let go openly and generously? Why was he so pitiful—even pathetic—begging for a love that had long been lost?

Yang Yi dared not look into his eyes; she turned her head away. After a long while, she decided to make things clear to avoid further entanglement.

She was not someone who liked trouble, whether it was a troublesome life or troublesome feelings; she preferred simplicity.

"Do you remember that time your mother came to school and invited us to dinner?" Yang Yi looked back at him for the first time, gazing calmly into his eyes. "I felt an unbridgeable chasm between us. The moment I sat in your mother's car, I decided to break up with you."

Chen Chen Huanyue's breathing suddenly grew heavy; his mind was momentarily confused. "But... but, that night we got along very well... my mother liked you very much, everything was fine..."

See, no one knew what turmoil had raged in a girl's heart at that harmonious and peaceful dinner table, a turmoil that even decided a part of her life.

"You were too excellent, and your family was too high above. If you had been even a little more ordinary, perhaps we could have gone on together back then. When I was with you, I was always anxious and uneasy." Yang Yi smiled openly. "At that time, I had nothing but my self-esteem, and I felt my self-esteem was more important than love. That is the reason."

Chen Chen Huanyue suddenly understood. "Yes, that intense, utterly unnecessary self-esteem of yours!" he said bitterly.

But hadn't this been part of the reason he fell for her in the first place? This girl, clearly living in straitened circumstances, had persisted in principles rarely seen in such a flashy society. Clearly, there were many ways to change her situation; if she had made just a small change, her life could have improved, yet she still chose the most difficult path. Sometimes, even he felt amazed and admiring.

But at this moment, he hated this trait of hers to the extreme.

"What about me?" Chen Chen Huanyue asked, his hands clenched tightly. Under Bai Xi's pale skin, veins almost bulged out. Anger surged up from his heart like a flood. "My... love... where is it?"

Yang Yi lifted her gaze to look at him, tilting her head slightly. "You have a vast future ahead. A brief campus romance is just a small interlude in your life. There are better things, things more suitable for you..."

"On what basis do you define my life?" Chen Chen Huanyue felt all his blood rush to his brain, causing tinnitus. The longing and unwillingness he had secretly harbored for three years instantly transformed into anger and resentment, along with a hint of unspoken grievance. "Do you think you are doing this for my own good? Are you great? Did you make a sacrifice? Don't you think you are too selfish..."

He took a deep breath, gripping the doorframe tightly with both hands, trying to calm his turbulent emotions and forcibly suppressing more accusations that threatened to spill out.

"Why didn't you tell me? Why didn't you let me solve all of that? Why did you leave so silently without even confessing to me? Like you vanished from the face of the earth? I even suspected you had been trafficked into the mountains, if not for later finding out you went back to collect your graduation certificate... How ridiculous! It turns out everything was just me being self-indulgent!" he said with a pathetic laugh.

Never in his life had he been in such a wretched state. He felt his heart being carelessly crushed under someone's feet. He wanted to leave immediately and end everything, yet deep inside, a reluctance arose—if he truly gave up, given her personality and way of acting, was there still a possibility between them?

He hated his own indecision, hated that he knew she did not care about his feelings, yet still could not let go.

His eyes were sore, swollen, and hot. He turned his head away, not wanting Yang Yi to see his eyes. He was grateful he was wearing glasses, so he wouldn't look so ridiculous.

Yang Yi looked at him and unconsciously froze. A truth struck her: he still loved her! For three whole years, he had not forgotten her? Not because of her superpower—she had not awakened when they were together—not because of any added value, but simply because of who she was?

This discovery sent a shiver through her entire body; a feeling of unprecedented emotion and fulfillment filled her heart.

But at the same time, a question arose: What exactly did he love about me? What was there about me back then that was worth liking? Was it that pitiful air of poverty? That narrow-mindedness of someone who had never seen the world? Or that feigned coldness which was actually extreme inferiority, leading to a neurotic sensitivity bordering on pathology? Who would like someone like that? Even I myself loathed who I was back then...

Yet that version of her had truly been loved sincerely and respectfully by a boy, a fact that even she found astonishing and surprising.

For the first time since their reunion, she looked seriously at the man before her. The sunshine and youthfulness of three years ago had faded from him, replaced by a touch of refinement and maturity, and a hint of the dignity of someone accustomed to being above others. His behavior was always very restrained; when he smiled, introduced himself, or urged others to drink, it seemed he had never overindulged. Everything he did was measured, every action and movement seemed filled with deep consideration, and anyone speaking before him had to think carefully about whether they had already drafted their words in their mind.

And precisely because of this series of traits, when she discovered his eyes were red beneath his glasses, she felt even more shaken.

Such a man had already been hers three years ago, and to this day he still remembered her with longing. Back then, she had no superpowers, no function to satisfy a man's vanity or show off, and conquering her would not bring extra sense of achievement. Yet he still fell in love with her, fell in love with that penniless, sensitive, and prickly girl. It was simply a miracle—no, simply strange!

She reached out, cupped his face, and looked at him carefully, trying to find even a trace of pretense or falsity on that face.

"Are you still a virgin?" Somehow, she suddenly asked.

Chen Chen Huanyue was stunned by her words, so much so that all his resentment and anger were replaced by shock. Then he realized her hands were cupping his face, and her dark eyes were silently gazing at him.

The warmth of her palms was hot, instantly setting his face ablaze. A fire seemed to ignite within his body as well; the heat from her palms felt like someone constantly adding firewood, making him feel hotter and hotter.

Suddenly, his mouth went dry and his tongue felt rough. He couldn't help but lick his lips, and his throat felt like it was about to smoke. "Y-yes... Why do you ask?" he asked, almost full of shame.

"From university graduation until now, you haven't had a girlfriend?" She smiled, a smile full of distrust and sarcasm. "Was it for me? Or did you just not find anyone suitable?"

He had never seen such a smile on her face before. In the past, she was youthful and stubborn, cold and sensitive; even her smiles carried defensiveness and unease, as if she were ready to pull away at any moment. He had once glimpsed her while she was working part-time; a strange feeling prompted him to get to know her, and the more he understood her, the more he unconsciously drew closer to her...

He thought of the news reports: her at the United Nations, with the Fire Demon, in Mist Town, and the Brain-Sucking Beasts of Wuming City that he had experienced firsthand... She was no longer the same person! In the news photos, she always wore a calm, polite smile, or had a blank expression, or looked down from on high with a sense of distance. Was that really her?

And now, there seemed to be more things in her eyes that he couldn't understand; she was more reserved, deeper, and more mysterious.

He almost didn't recognize her anymore.

Facing his silence, she seemed a bit disappointed. The hands holding his face loosened slightly, as if she wanted to pull away.

This feeling of being both near and far struck him again. How many times had he wanted to take another step into her heart, only to encounter her distance? In this instant, the powerful God of Humanity and that stubborn, sensitive girl merged into one, giving him a sense of reality.

He suddenly grasped her hands, gazed into her dark eyes, and said slowly: "No one else is suitable but you."

Yang Yi's heart trembled. At this moment, a strong desire surged up in her heart. She wanted to kiss him. She wanted to take off his glasses, kiss his red-rimmed eyes, kiss his restrained lips, kiss the love for her that he had not stopped feeling for the past three years.

Had she ever loved him? Was there not even a trace of love mixed into her past gratitude and her hopes for him? When she deliberately stayed away from him, was her heart truly calm and undisturbed?

Suddenly, the phone rang, snapping Yang Yi back to reality and rousing her from that sudden, uncontrollable surge of desire.

She hastily let go of his face, pulled her phone from her pocket, and saw it was Director Zhou.

"I heard the Brain-Sucking Beast was dealt with last night? And you even captured a few alive? That's excellent material for research!" Director Zhou sounded very excited. "Well done; it had to be you! Like I said, you are a vital national resource, a strategic weapon—hey, I'm not objectifying you; this is genuine praise! Admiration!"

"I know." Yang Yi smiled too. "It's just a bit pressuring."

"Don't feel any pressure? Regardless of what others say, just be yourself. I know being suddenly elevated to this position brings extraordinary pressure. And you, being such a... sigh—I know your dream is to farm in the mountains and live a quiet, leisurely life... Let's just keep moving forward; perhaps when the anomalous creatures disappear, that dream will come true! Don't you agree?" Director Zhou spoke in the tone of an old friend chatting casually.

What Yang Yi respected most about Director Zhou was that he never bullied others with his authority or his experience, never acting as though the salt he had eaten outnumbered the rice others had consumed, nor presuming to dictate others' lives simply because he had witnessed many things.

He respected others' thoughts and wishes; he was almost the finest elder she had ever encountered. Having him as her superior made her feel motivated in her work.

"Alright, one must always have dreams." Yang Yi smiled again. "I'm heading to Shu Province immediately."

"Good, I'll call ahead and have them prepare to cooperate."

After hanging up, Yang Yi finally noticed Chen Chen Huanyue still waiting beside her; she felt extremely embarrassed, not even knowing why she had asked that awkward question just now.

"I have to go; they're waiting urgently over in Shu Province." Yang Yi put on a very busy air.

Chen Chen Huanyue seemed to have regained his composure; he smiled with restraint. "I know you're very busy. Shall we... exchange phone numbers?"

With such a cautious tone, how could Yang Yi bear to refuse? After exchanging numbers, she hurried toward the elevator, not daring to look back at Chen Chen Huanyue's figure.