Chapter 52: Death by the Rod

The Grand Secretaries of the Grand Secretariat and the Ministers of the Six Ministries remained inside the Grand Secretariat until the hour of the monkey before dispersing one after another.

Setting aside Wen Tiren's visit to Tian Ergeng to retrieve years of data on commodity prices and people's livelihoods, Shi Fenglai and Guo Yunhou went together to the Hall of Mental Cultivation to seek an audience with the Chongzhen Emperor.

But as they approached the Hall of Supreme Harmony, both men deeply regretted not having chosen a different time to come.

Before the Hall of Supreme Harmony, a dark mass of people had gathered — aside from the eunuchs and palace maids attending the nobles and the guards currently on duty, it seemed nearly half the palace staff were assembled on the plaza in front of the hall.

Wei Zhongxian, Cao Huachun, Tian Ergeng, Xu Xianchun — the reigning Son of Heaven's chief hawks and hounds, all present save for Wang Cheng'en and Fang Zhenghua, who remained at Chongzhen's side at all times.

From the look of things, with a row of long staves standing before the Hall of Supreme Harmony, it was clear the palace was about to enforce its household rules.

Shi Fenglai and Guo Yunhou, seeing Tian Ergeng here as well, were just reckoning that the Chief Grand Secretary would likely find his visit fruitless when Wei Zhongxian and the others also spotted the two of them.

After the two men went over and exchanged courtesies, Wei Zhongxian said with a smile, "You two have come at just the right time. If you hadn't, I was about to send someone to the Grand Secretariat to fetch people over."

Shi Fenglai asked curiously, "What does Eunuch Wei mean by that?"

Wei Zhongxian said, "No hurry. The other Grand Secretaries and Ministers should be arriving soon as well. We'll talk in a moment."

After about the time it takes for half an incense stick to burn, guards arrived escorting the other Grand Secretaries of the Grand Secretariat and the Ministers and Vice Ministers of each ministry.

Seeing everyone assembled, Wei Zhongxian cleared his throat and said, "The reason We have called you all here today is by His Majesty's will.

Not long ago, there were those who spied upon the palace forbidden precincts and communicated between the inner and outer courts.

The Grand Secretary Zhou outside the palace and the others have all had their crimes and punishments settled and will soon be making a trip to the the the Caishikou execution ground execution ground execution ground.

As for those implicated within the palace, they shall be dealt with inside the palace.

But His Majesty is kind-hearted, thinking to punish past offenses to prevent future ones, to cure the sickness and save the patient. So he ordered me to invite all you gentlemen to come observe the punishment, lest anyone forget later and reoffend."

Having said this, he addressed the Western Depot agents, "Bring those ungrateful curs up here."

At his words, a group of Western Depot agents marched over a dozen Embroidered Uniform Guard guardsmen and more than twenty eunuchs and palace maids, then kicked them to the ground and forced them to kneel properly.

Wei Zhongxian looked at these people, pacing up to them, and said in a sinister tone, "You all have quite the talent. What things may be done, and what things may not — did you truly have no sense of it in your hearts?

Today, there is no choice but to send you on your way. When you reach the underworld, do not bear a grudge against me.

If you must hate someone, hate yourselves for your own failure!"

Having spoken, he said to the Western Depot agents, "Bring forth the household law instruments of punishment."

The Western Depot agents answered in unison, and someone carried out a table, upon which was placed a portrait of Lord Guan the Second.

It is rather amusing: the Eastern Depot venerates Yue Wumu, and the Western Depot venerates Lord Guan the Second — both chosen for their meaning of loyalty and devotion to the sovereign. Yet the superintendents of both the Eastern and Western Depots are all eunuchs.

Once the Western Depot agents had finished setting up, Wei Zhongxian first went and offered incense to Lord Guan the Second, then turned back and addressed the palace maids and eunuchs standing to the side, "We eunuchs and palace maids in the palace are, by nature, His Majesty's household slaves.

Since ancient times, among the common folk, a household slave who betrays his master is beaten to death without question, and even the local authorities will not intervene.

All the more so since you and I are all His Majesty's household slaves. If you truly commit an offense, do not imagine that anyone can save you. These petty eunuchs today are your example."

Having spoken, he said to Tian Ergeng and Xu Xianchun, "You two, the household of your Embroidered Uniform Guard must be cleaned up by your Embroidered Uniform Guard itself. It is not convenient for me to interfere. However, today, I shall send these slaves on their way first. What do you say?"

It must be said that Wei Zhongxian indeed did not fail to justify the high regard in which both the Tianqi Emperor and the Chongzhen Emperor held him.

Now, seeing that the Chongzhen Emperor did not wish to see him dominate alone, he was even courteous and polite toward Tian Ergeng and Xu Xianchun, whom he had previously ordered about at will.

Seeing the two men had no objection, he said to the Western Depot agents, "Carry out the punishment. Send these curs on their way."

At his command, Western Depot agents dragged five eunuchs forward, pressed them onto the long benches before Lord Guan the Second's portrait and tied them down, then raised the long staves standing to the side and brought them down with force.

In a short while, the five eunuchs on the benches had died. Wei Zhongxian waved his hand, and five more were immediately swapped in.

This was repeated again and again until all twenty-odd eunuchs and palace maids had been beaten to death by the rod.

Only the execution of the palace maids was somewhat more troublesome; unable to bear the pain, they lost control of their bowels and bladders, making a foul and filthy mess.

When the punishment was complete, Wei Zhongxian looked at the remaining eunuchs and palace maids, who were trembling with fear, and spoke, "You have all seen it, yes?

In the future, should anyone dare to emulate these curs and bite the hand that feeds them, these twenty-odd people today are the best example!" Then he said to Tian Ergeng and Xu Xianchun, "You two, I have dealt with the eunuchs and palace maids of the palace.

The rest I leave to you."

At this time, the division of the Embroidered Uniform Guard had not yet been completed, so Tian Ergeng stepped forward and addressed the assembled guardsmen, "You have all seen what just happened, yes? I will not say much else.

Our Embroidered Uniform Guard is the Son of Heaven's own army. Today's events are entirely the result of these wretches bringing it upon themselves.

You all watch carefully, and do not forget your own station! If in the future anyone dares to communicate between the inner and outer courts again, we will have no choice but to clean house."

Having spoken, he said to the Han generals beside him, "Carry out the punishment. Send them on their way, then behead them and transmit the news to all Embroidered Uniform Guard garrisons as a warning to those who come after!"

Upon hearing this, those Han generals immediately dragged over one of the implicated guardsmen kneeling on the ground. Without bothering with any bench or bindings, they simply hurled him to the ground and brought their military staves down upon him.

The method differed from the way Wei Zhongxian had beaten the eunuchs and palace maids to death earlier; this was the military method of beating a man to death with indiscriminate blows.

After over a hundred wild, unaimed blows, the guardsman on the ground was visibly breathing his last and died. Tian Ergeng's expression did not change; he did not even bat an eyelid, and simply said, "Next."

The beating of the dozen-odd offending Embroidered Uniform Guard guardsmen took even longer than that of the palace maids and eunuchs, lasting nearly a full two-hour period before all were beaten to death.

Once these palace maids, eunuchs, and guardsmen had all been beaten to death, Wei Zhongxian once more came before the crowd and said, "Let today's events be engraved in your hearts. His Majesty is kind-hearted, but my eyes can tolerate no sand.

If in the future you dare again to commit acts of betraying your master, do not let me discover it. Otherwise, what you will suffer will be far worse than a simple death by the rod."

After this round of warnings, he finally said, "All of you, return now. Attend to your own duties." The palace eunuchs and maids, upon hearing this, felt as if they had been granted a great amnesty and hurriedly dispersed.

Tian Ergeng followed suit, and after delivering his own admonitions, ordered the Embroidered Uniform Guard personnel to disperse.

Only at this point did Wei Zhongxian return to where the court officials stood and ask Shi Fenglai and Guo Yunhou what business had brought them to the palace.

Thanks to book friend NTSB for the reward, and congratulations on being honored as Hall Master.

Thanks to book friend Pingdan de Shiqing for the reward, and congratulations on being honored as Helmsman.

Thanks to book friends Weishui Shangshang and Zimin Qing Gui'an for the rewards, and congratulations on being honored as Steward.

Thanks to the many book friends for their rewards. The list is too long to name one by one. Many thanks, many thanks.

Strongly recommending a book, "The Return of the Worst Slacker Student" — a hilarious writing style, satisfying as hell. Friends who like it can add it to your bookshelf.

Also, this chapter is a true bonus update. We have finally begun to repay Our debts.

(End of chapter)