Chapter 140

The Feelings of a Cultivator

"How could you have such an absurd thought?"

Ruan Rong was also caught between laughter and tears. Just like in the past, she rolled her eyes at Ruan Ci and scolded, "With your state of mind, how are you still so unsteady... Furthermore, isn't this just a fantasy? I am the direct disciple of the Sect Master, and the Song Crown Prince is also highly regarded by his master at the Flowing Light Hall. We are both at the ninth layer of Foundation Establishment and are candidates with prospects for the Grotto-Heaven realm. I even bear the fortune of Donghua. With such status, how could I engage in romance with a disciple of an outer sect and disturb that cause and effect?"

When she had secretly grieved in the past that she could not marry the Song Crown Prince, she had known it was due to the constraints of their positions. Where did this calm and composed eloquence come from now? Ruan Ci smiled and said, "Everything you said is indeed true, but I only hear one meaning: that in your heart, Sister, you no longer like him."

Ruan Rong casually picked up the bamboo wife from the couch and threw it at Ruan Ci, raging, "You just love to mess with me."

Given their current agility, there was no way the bamboo wife would hit her. Ruan Ci pointed a finger, fixing the bamboo wife in mid-air. Ruan Rong pinched a spell, and they began to struggle within the field of momentum, wanting to use their magic power to bring the bamboo wife under their own control. The two streams of spiritual power went back and forth in the air, all while being careful not to damage the bamboo wife. As they snatched it back and forth, it actually became quite fun. The bamboo wife flew around the room. When Qi Yueying opened the door and entered, she saw a bamboo wife flying toward her face. She reached out to grab it, but the bamboo wife fell to the ground and suddenly flew into Ruan Ci's hand. Ruan Ci said triumphantly, "Sister Rong, I calculated the change after Yue Niang arrived. I won."

Ruan Rong had already returned to her calm and composed appearance. She reached out to pick up her teacup, took a light sip, and said indifferently, "In the end, didn't this bamboo wife still hit you?"

The two of them indeed had no clear agreement on how to count a win in this game. Just now, when the bamboo wife fell into Ruan Ci's hand, the momentum was indeed quite heavy and fierce; it wouldn't be wrong to say it was thrown at her. Ruan Ci thought for a moment; she wasn't a competitive person by nature, so she just laughed it off and pointed at Ruan Rong, saying, "You just didn't want to answer my question."

Ruan Rong rolled her eyes at her, and Qi Yueying asked with a smile, "What question? Were you talking about the Wugou Sect?"

The two sisters naturally stopped mentioning the Song Crown Prince and began to talk about what Ruan Ci had seen and heard at the Wugou Sect. Qi Yueying said, "This matter is indeed suspicious. In the past, when we went out for training, we also got to know fellow Daoists from the Wugou Sect, or even visited them. The Wugou Sect's mountain gate was indeed like that. They protect the four kingdoms and do not actively recruit disciples. Naturally, devout disciples from the four kingdoms come to make pilgrimages. Those who have both fate and talent are recruited into the sect, and the rest of the common people also practice Buddhism well, hoping to return to this place in their next life. Buddhist sects are numerous within the four kingdoms, and in their lifetime, the common people always spend several years practicing in temples. It can be said to be a small Buddhist pure land. This is mostly the case under the rule of major Buddhist sects; it is indeed much more peaceful than the kingdoms protected by our Profound Sect."

In the Central Continent, without the maintenance of magic arrays and without immortal masters to clear out monsters, mortal kingdoms simply could not continue. Therefore, this protection is indeed a real relationship, not just collecting some offerings and maintaining a nominal relationship of respect. However, the Profound Sect rarely interferes with the rise and fall of mortal kingdoms. For example, the nine kingdoms protected by the Shangqing Sect often change dynasties, and the nine kingdoms also raise and train soldiers among themselves, and cultivate a large number of body cultivators and low-tier cultivators. Firstly, to maintain the borders, they often have to cross the national protection array to kill monsters and reduce the pressure on the array. Secondly, they can find opportunities to expand their territory and weaken the strength of other kingdoms. Therefore, although they are mortal kingdoms, they are equally restless with constant rise and fall. Only families that can have descendants continuously selected as servants for the Shangqing Sect can prosper for a longer time, but there are few families that have flourished for ten thousand years without failure.

If it were in the past, Ruan Ci would inevitably have doubts, but having experienced more now, she knows that for the sect, such turmoil is not necessarily bad, and just like under the rule of Buddhism, it is not necessarily good. Even for mortals, it depends on their life encounters and personality. The rule of Buddhism is so stable, but it is difficult for their status at birth to change in a lifetime. If born into a lowly profession, if they want to change their destiny, they can only go to Lingshan for pilgrimage. Over time, the believers are naturally extremely devout, regarding Lingshan as their only destination, and even want to return to this place after reincarnation. It is not like the nine kingdoms under the Shangqing Sect, where if one is capable, one can naturally find opportunities to change one's destiny. Even for cultivators and immortal masters, they are cunning and guarded, regarding them as existences that can be gambled and traded. And the price of this is naturally that the dull and stupid will likely find it difficult to survive and reproduce.

Ruan Ci cannot say which of these two lives is better or worse. She was born in turmoil and also obtained this fate in turmoil, but she also lost all her family because of the turmoil. She has both aversion and attachment to this turmoil. At least turmoil means vitality, and in that Buddhist pure land, unless everyone can practice and transcend, how is it not the greatest injustice to the bottom layer?

These various thoughts can only be born now that she has this knowledge. Ruan Rong is different from Ruan Ci; she has not had a day of peace since she was born. Therefore, although she does not understand the changes in the Wugou Sect, she is very curious and yearning for the small Buddhist pure land. She said, "It's no wonder that the common people all want to reincarnate only in this place. In the sect, I heard the maids talk about the days in the nine kingdoms, which are also turbulent and uneasy. Being able to be born in this place is already a great blessing for the common people."

Qi Yueying smiled slightly and said, "Little Martial Aunt is right."

Ruan Ci, however, disagreed, but when she wanted to explain in detail, she felt that Ruan Rong had not seen what she had seen, and it was normal for her to think so. She said, "Sister, when you see more in the future, you will know that it is not that simple."

As soon as she finished speaking, she felt it was wrong. After reflecting on it, she hurriedly spat, "I hate it most when others say this to me. How come I'm saying it myself now?"

Ruan Rong chimed in, "It shows that although these words sound unpleasant, they are very satisfying to say."

Everyone laughed. Qi Yueying added, "Although the mountain gate is like this, because of the scriptures they hold, the Wugou Sect has always been relatively simple. But at that time, I heard people say that there was no lack of floating mountains and flying pavilions within the mountain gate. Several high monks in the Bodhisattva realm also built small pure lands, and the entrance was within the great array. I don't know why, but this time when we went, all the entrances to the small pure lands were hidden and could not be sensed, and the high monks in the Bodhisattva realm were also sitting and living in meditation rooms. I don't know what changes they have undergone, or what special techniques they are practicing, that they have changed their ways to this extent."

She took out another jade slip and recorded everything Ruan Ci said today, especially what she saw when returning the monk's show, which others had indeed not participated in. She said, "It is better to report this matter to our benefactor early."

Ruan Ci reminded, "Don't forget the matter of Monk Yu asking you for the venue fee."

Qi Yueying said, "I already sent a flying sword message to inform about this a few days ago."

She attached the jade slip to the flying sword, pushed the window to send it out, turned around and said, "When we are away from home, although we send peace letters every day, the sect may not necessarily read them all. But as disciples, there is only being overly lazy; how can there be being overly diligent?"

After saying this, Ruan Rong was fine, but Ruan Ci couldn't help but feel ashamed and inferior, wanting to emulate the virtuous. Thinking of how True Person Wang treated her, it was naturally better than how Qi Yueying's master treated her, but after she left home, let alone greeting letters, she hadn't even sent a word back. Occasionally, when she thought of her master, she didn't have anything good to say, so she couldn't help but feel ashamed. She stood up and said, "Tell me before Yue Niang sends the letter tomorrow. I will also write a letter to Zixu Heaven."

Back in her room, she picked up her pen and thought for a while, but even the ink had dried, and she didn't know what to write. She had to write a hasty piece, saying, "Master, your disciple is very well. Are you well, Master? Is Tianlu well? Is Yingying well? Are those servants and followers of mine still obedient? Your disciple has seen many fresh things outside, but Master should have seen them all, just didn't tell me, so I won't say anything either. I also have many insights, but Master should have experienced them all, so I won't say anything either."

She bit her pen holder and thought for a long time, then added a line, "I bought a jar of Zen tea at the Wugou Sect market. Master should have drunk it too, but I bought it anyway. The Wugou Sect has many changes, but Yue Niang has said it all in the jade slip. Master should also know, so I won't say much more, lest Master thinks I am long-winded."

Speaking of this, there was really nothing to write. She barely managed to fill half a page, so that was it. She changed a piece of paper to write to Tianlu, but it was a thousand words, writing more than ten pages. Just asking about Yingying took a whole page. It was hard to stop her pen, seal the letter, and find Qi Yueying to hand it over. She wanted to return to her room to adjust her breath, but because after this letter was sent out, she couldn't help but have an extra expectation for a reply, her mood was also difficult to calm down for a while. After returning to her room for a moment, she still couldn't help but go to find Ruan Rong to talk.

On the flying boat, spiritual power changes at any time, so adjusting breath is barely possible, but it is not suitable for cultivation. Therefore, most Foundation Establishment cultivators do not travel far. This is also why True Person Chu said, "After Golden Core, you must learn a few things about zither, chess, calligraphy, and painting." Cultivators do not need sleep, and once they go out, they have to have some hobbies to pass the time during journeys that can last for months or even hundreds of years. Otherwise, like Ruan Ci, she could only shamelessly hug the door panel, poke out a pair of eyes, and sneakily watch Ruan Rong's movements.

Ruan Rong was sitting cross-legged on the couch, closing her eyes to rest. After leaving Ruan Ci hanging for a while, she said unhappily, "Come in. How are you still looking like a piece of rotten wood and dusty beam?"

In the Song Kingdom, because there is no water, there is no mud. They boil jade for drink and cook rice for food, and there are no snacks like twisted sugar. Saying someone has no shape usually means they look like the crooked and soft beams that have fallen in an empty house where no one lives. This is a very regrettable thing in the Song Kingdom, because the beams have to be transported from other countries and also blessed with charms, which is very rare. Ruan Rong's phrasing is now not understood by Ruan Ci, Ruan Qian, and the Song Crown Prince. Even in the Song Kingdom now, fifty years have passed, the mountains are clear and the waters are beautiful, and things have changed. How would the common people today know this phrase?

Ruan Ci felt soft in her heart, sat next to Ruan Rong, lay on her knees and lost her mind for a long time before asking, "Sister Rong, do you really not like the Song Crown Prince at all in your heart now?"

Ruan Rong said, "Why do you keep thinking about this? You care so much, is it because you have something in your own heart?"

Ruan Ci rolled her eyes and smiled, "I'm already married, how could I not have something?"

Ruan Rong didn't know the details yet. Ruan Ci deleted and fabricated a little bit about her and Qu Qu Tan Yue, told her, and added, "This Young Master Yue has married more than a hundred wives, so one more doesn't matter. If I can connect with him, I can naturally cooperate with you, Sister, in the future. Although I was not very willing when I got married, the cause and effect have been established. After all, he has taken care of me a lot. If there is a chance, I still want to introduce him to you, Sister."

When traveling outside, who knows if there are great powers watching in secret? Ruan Ci said this flawlessly. Ruan Rong heard it and said, "No wonder Yue Niang suddenly mentioned the Xuanpo Sect a few days ago."

She frowned slightly, obviously disliking the style of the Xuanpo Sect, but then sighed, "Since entering the Dao, I only feel that the human marriage of cultivators is completely different from us mortals. Thinking about it, this is one of them. Marriage vows, in the eyes of mortals, naturally hope that both parties are in love, stay together for a long time, and spread their branches and leaves. For cultivators, it seems to be just for forming alliances. The cause and effect formed by the two parties in marriage, I think, must be more reliable than friends. As for whether there is any emotional entanglement involved, it is not necessarily so. If there is love, the fate will be closer; if there is no love, the cause and effect will still be there."

Ruan Ci said, "Exactly. Sometimes I also think, cultivators are already different from mortals in every way. Will the emotions eventually be cultivated to be different from mortals one day? Otherwise, the emotions of mortals are actually obstacles for cultivators everywhere. For mortals, liking someone means hoping to be with them all the time. Once they leave, the pain of lovesickness is very disturbing. Looking at the records in poetry, what 'just off the eyebrows but on the heart', what 'wasting away for her', it can even hinder serious business. But for cultivators, one retreat can last for decades or hundreds of years, and when practicing, the heart lake must be unstained by dust, forgetting both things and self, to enter meditation. If one is a person who values emotions, how can one do this? I'm afraid that cultivation will be difficult to progress, and one will eventually fall halfway?"

She also had doubts about this matter early on, because this contradicts the planting of love seeds into the spirit and the planting of love seeds into the life. Meng Lingyue carried love seeds and practiced to the mid-stage of Foundation Establishment. According to Wang Panpan, love seeds enter the spirit, and when practiced to the Nascent Soul realm, one can refine the Wisdom Sword to cut off the love threads. It can be seen that love seeds do not seem to hinder cultivation much.

Ruan Rong smiled, "Most of those people are borrowing emotions to express their ambitions. Do you really think those boudoir resentment poems are written for daughters? Mortal ministers all compare themselves to resentful women and write them for emperors... It is rare for people to be emotionless, but if they are so worried because they cannot be with the person they like, how many more mortals would die in a year? As far as I can see, it's not that bad."

She pondered and said, "As for saying that the emotions of cultivators are different from mortals, this is indeed true. Like me and Song..."

She paused and laughed, "It seems that when the Crown Prince was holding the Pure Mouth Mantra, I was still a mortal. Now I can't even recite his real name... When I met him, neither of us had entered the Dao. At that time, we were young and in love, and he was the best husband candidate in the Song Kingdom. Perhaps there was also some vanity at work, so naturally, I hoped to be together for a long time."

"The marriage didn't work out, so naturally I was very disappointed. I became resentful because of love and took it out on him. But later, we each had our own encounters, and our lives had earth-shaking changes. After we both entered the Dao, I gradually forgot him. Seeing him again this time, the old love has been forgotten, and there is only a little lingering charm. In fact, this ending is not necessarily bad. Even if we were truly in love and made a vow, what could we do? Both parties have their own ambitions. I want to avenge the Ruan family, and he also has the kindness of his sect. Being in the situation, if you want to stand out, you naturally have many things to do. It is rare to have leisure, and even rarer to have coincidence. Can you really put everything down, stay together for a long time, forget all your ambitions, and just live for these hundreds of years?"

The two sisters talked, not entirely heart-to-heart, but also without pretense. Ruan Ci heard the slight sadness in Ruan Rong's words and felt it made sense, and felt even more guilty—she naturally also wanted to end the Ruan family's cause and effect, and even more wanted to return the sword to Sister Xie, but for her, cultivation was not just for these two things. Wanting to ascend to the upper realm was naturally because she wanted to see the upper realm. And the Ruan family's disaster was ultimately caused by her. This thought seemed a bit selfish in front of Ruan Rong's responsible words.

But although Ruan Ci thought so, she would not change, nor would she confess to her sister, and it was not easy to persuade her sister to relax a little. She just said, "That's right. Perhaps for us cultivators, there is no deep love to speak of. The so-called love, at its strongest, is just hoping that the fate will be connected and each other will be well. When leaving the retreat, we can meet for a while due to fate. As for staying together for a long time, there is no such possibility. Just knowing each other's hearts is perfection."

Ruan Rong also felt that what she said was right, and said, "Perhaps this is why cultivators have quietly changed the meaning of marriage and turned it into another kind of alliance. The idea of 'one pair for a lifetime' is almost impossible. Even if two hearts know each other, it is only the perfection of that moment of knowing. This meeting is indeed knowing each other, but next time we meet, who knows what kind of adventures we have experienced in the meantime, what changes have occurred in our state of mind, whether this love has ended, whether we have changed our hearts, whether we no longer care about love in our hearts, but only devote ourselves to cultivation and focus on the Dao... These are things no one can say clearly. A mortal's life is only a hundred years, but a cultivator's is thousands or tens of thousands of years, or even infinite lifespan. Even if it is good, after thousands of years, you may get tired of it. Who knows when the longing in your heart at this moment will disappear?"

For some reason, there was a bit of melancholy and resentment in her words, but she also said hopefully, "Even if you are very eager, but you cannot be together, the torment will probably only last for hundreds of years. If you don't see each other for a long time, you will naturally forget it slowly."

She ultimately had no defense against Ruan Ci. Without knowing it, she was tricked into speaking. Ruan Ci thought to herself, "It seems that Sister is indeed missing someone she cannot be with, and this person is not in the sect, at least not in the Seven Stars Small Abode, so it cannot be the Sect Master."

She felt slightly relieved—in fact, even if Ruan Rong really admired the Sect Master, she didn't think there was anything wrong with it. She just didn't like it because Ruan Ci didn't like the Sect Master. She asked again, "Then how did Sister Rong know you liked the Crown Prince?"

Ruan Rong glanced at her and sneered, "I just said it, you really have something in your heart, and it may not be that Young Master Yue, just using him as a cover to hide it from me." Ruan Ci could see through her thoughts, and how could she not know Ruan Ci's cunning nature like the back of her hand?

After poking her like this, seeing her sister hide her face and shrink on her legs, she finally felt pity in her heart. She gently scraped her cheek with her long fingers and said, "I can't teach you this either. I can only let you hear those annoying words again. When you have experienced it in the future, you will know that it is not that simple. When you should understand, you will naturally understand."

Ruan Ci murmured, complaining, "Don't scrape me with your nails, it's so itchy..."

Ruan Rong said softly, "The road is still long. You can pretend to sleep for a while. Do you remember, when we were at home, you were always dishonest during your nap, secretly climbed up to bother me, we fought, and then you were lying on me and fell asleep like this again."

Ruan Ci couldn't help but laugh, rubbed her eyes on Ruan Rong's knees, really yawned, closed her eyes and rested peacefully for a while, then pointed casually, changed a quilt on her body, lay on Ruan Rong and murmured, "Sister Rong, cover me with the quilt..."

Ruan Rong chuckled, pulled the quilt under Ruan Ci's neck, wrapped it tightly, wrapped Ruan Ci like a big meat worm, arching on the couch, "You are the only one who loves to be spoiled. Watch me not clean you up in a few days..."

As she spoke, her voice gradually weakened, and she began to pat Ruan Ci slowly. When Ruan Ci's breathing became even, she sighed silently, supported her chin and looked out the window. In her beautiful eyes, a little sorrow was gradually revealed, and she said in a mosquito voice, "Sometimes, I really envy you..."

The flying boat galloped in the air. Qi Yueying stood at the bow of the boat, looking around, full of alertness. In a flash, several months passed. Time passed slowly. After coming out of the Wugou Sect, the journey was safe and sound. On this day, the magic boat finally stopped slowly. Everyone crowded to the bow of the boat to enjoy the surrounding scenery, but it was finally the Cold Rain Marsh.

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Updated, sorry for the long wait. The point in this chapter is also a regret of mine when I read novels. I think the alienation of cultivators after obtaining power is all-round, of course, including changes in moral systems, values, and views on emotions. It is rare to see discussions on this kind of thing. It is a point that inspired me to write "Borrowing the Sword". So although the plot has been a bit flat recently, I am writing it very happily.

The stock is still 4. Today is Halloween, I went out to play! Eat at a good restaurant at noon! Does anyone have any plans? Remember to pay the final payment at night...

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