Chapter 4389: Preaching and Teaching

Zhao Desan rubbed his temples and looked at Su Qing with an apologetic face, saying: "I drank a bit too much and forgot about that just now."

Su Qing said with a smile: "It's okay. You helped me a lot tonight, and everything you did was very appropriate. They all have a very good impression of you..."

The two sat on the edge of the bed and chatted about the banquet tonight. From Su Qing's words, Zhao Desan learned a lot of knowledge about officialdom, especially in terms of serving superior leaders. There was a lot of knowledge that one wouldn't usually notice, making Zhao Desan realize thoroughly that the set of things he had learned from interacting with leaders in the local government was really just child's play when coming to Beijing.

When Su Qing was a bit thirsty from 'preaching and teaching', Zhao Desan went to the next room to get a bag of Biluochun, brewed two cups, and handed one to Wu Min. Wu Min took a sip and continued: "Some people say that drinking quality is like character. From the performance at the banquet, one can see a person's personality, especially the style of a leader. If the leader accompanying you is an open-minded leader and a leader with an upright style, you can be at ease, don't worry, and just have a pleasant time. Otherwise, you must identify who is the leader with the highest rank at the banquet, and everything must revolve around this leader with the highest rank. Let him sit in the most important position, let the second most important figures sit on his two sides, and whatever wine he loves to drink, that is the wine that must be served. Whatever he says, others must support him. If a subordinate urges him to drink, he may drink or not drink, and it cannot be forced. But if he urges a subordinate to drink, as a subordinate, one must usually drink it. Why? Because the leader urging you to drink is giving you face and thinking highly of you; you cannot be unappreciative. And Zhao Desan undoubtedly received Old Ma's favor tonight."

At a banquet where leaders are present, while revolving around the core of the leader with the highest rank, one cannot ignore one's own direct supervisor. One must grasp the relationship and limits between the highest leader and the direct supervisor, and one cannot be careless. Flattering words that should be said cannot be left unsaid and must be said in a timely manner; words that should not be said cannot be said even by a single word. Every sentence spoken must be cautious! The knowledge of drinking with leaders is profound and mysterious, varying from person to person, time to time, and place to place.

Especially in officialdom, drinking is a very profound knowledge. One must be able to drink but not be an alcoholic. If drinking with leaders, there is even more to pay attention to. Although there is a saying at the wine table that 'deep feelings are drunk in one gulp, shallow feelings are licked', one must never keep this saying on one's lips when drinking. One must know how to hide one's light and bide one's time, and one must never act big as soon as one gets to the wine table. Before toasting, one must wait for the leaders to finish drinking with each other before the people below have the qualification to toast. As a subordinate toasting a superior leader, one cannot toast multiple leaders with one glass of wine at the same time; only multiple people can toast one leader at the same time. When toasting others, if you don't clink glasses, how much you drink yourself can be seen according to the situation, such as the other party's drinking capacity and the other party's attitude toward drinking, but you must not drink less than the other party; you must know that you are the one toasting others. If you toast others, once you clink glasses, say, 'I'll finish, you drink as you wish,' so that it appears generous.

If your position is humble, remember to add wine for the leaders more often, and don't blindly drink on behalf of the leaders. If you want to drink on behalf of the leaders, you must do it when the leader really wants to find someone to drink on their behalf, and you must pretend that you are drinking because you want to drink, not because you are drinking on behalf of the leader. For example, if the leader cannot handle the alcohol, you can block the people who want to toast the leader through side-attacks. When raising the wine glass, hold your wrist with your right hand and pad the bottom of the glass with your left hand, remembering that your glass is always lower than others. If you are the leader, don't lower your status, and don't put yourself too low, otherwise how can you teach the people below how to behave? If there are no special people present, it is best to clink glasses clockwise, and don't favor one over the other. When toasting and clinking glasses, there must be a saying. Usually, business is not discussed at the wine table. If the drinking is good, the business will naturally be almost done; everyone understands this in their hearts, otherwise they wouldn't drink with you openly. Also, you must not act crooked, you must not say the wrong things, you must not do the wrong things, you must not argue, and consciously punishing yourself with a drink is the hard truth. If you encounter a situation where there is not enough wine, put the wine bottle in the middle of the table and let people add it themselves; you must never go around pouring wine one by one like a rag. If someone doesn't get wine, it will be very embarrassing.

Be careful not to lose your words after drinking, don't talk big, don't lose your composure, don't spit, don't let chopsticks fly around, don't point fingers around, don't make slurping sounds when drinking soup, don't fart or burp; if you can't hold it, go to the restroom. Don't keep 'I can't drink' on your lips, so as not to let others scold you for being hypocritical. Whether you believe it or not, whether a person can drink can really be seen. If a leader drinks with you, it is giving you face; no matter how much the leader wants you to drink, you must drink first as a sign of respect, and you must raise the glass with both hands.

There is one more point that is particularly important: when the leader picks up food, never turn the turntable in the middle of the wine table; this is a great taboo. When you are six-tenths drunk, you must fill the glass every time you clink glasses, and then pretend that you didn't hold the wine cup steadily before drinking, trying to spill some out, so that you can drink less each time you drink.

Arranging the seating of leaders is a knowledge, and it is a very important and very sensitive content. If the seating arrangement is not appropriate, it will often cause some suspicion, so when arranging seating, one must grasp the basic principles and must be steady and cautious to avoid causing unnecessary trouble.

For example, the arrangement of seating on the conference podium, the principle is that when the leader faces the venue, the left is the upper, and the right is the lower. When the number of leader comrades is odd, the number one leader is in the middle, the number two leader is on the left hand side of the number one leader, the number three leader is on the right hand side, and others are arranged in order; when the number of leader comrades is even, the number one leader and the number two leader are in the middle at the same time, the number one leader is on the left side of the middle seat, the number two leader is on the right side, and others are arranged in order; if there are multiple rows of seating, the front row is higher than the back row, and the main leaders are arranged in the first row. The back row seats are also arranged like the first row; if it is a report meeting, the seating on the podium is generally arranged in a way that the reporter and the person in charge of the host unit are arranged alternately or the persons in charge of each unit are arranged alternately.

There is also the seating arrangement for meetings. Meetings are usually arranged in a reception room or office. Sometimes the host and guest sit on each side, and sometimes they sit interspersed together. The guest sits on the right side of the host, and the interpreter and recorder are arranged behind the host and the main guest. Other guests are seated on the side of the main guest according to the protocol order, and the host's accompanying persons are seated on the side of the host. If there are not enough seats, seats can be added in the back row.

Then there is the seating arrangement for talks. Bilateral talks usually use a rectangular or oval table. The host and guest sit opposite each other, with the main door as the standard, the host occupies the side with their back to the door, the guest faces the main door, and the main negotiator is in the middle. China is accustomed to arranging the interpreter on the right side of the main negotiator, but some countries let the interpreter sit behind, and generally, the host's arrangement should be respected. Other personnel are arranged left and right according to the protocol order. If one end of the long table for talks faces the main door, then the direction of entering the door is the standard, the right is the guest side, and the left is the host side. For multilateral talks, seats can be arranged in a circle, square, etc. For small-scale talks, there are also cases where long tables are not used, and only sofas are set up, and the seats of both sides are arranged according to the seating arrangement for meetings.

And the seating arrangement for the signing ceremony, generally, the hosts of both signing sides are on the left, and the guests are on the right of the host. The number of other people on both sides is generally equal, and they are arranged behind the seats of their respective signing personnel according to the protocol order. The assistants of both sides stand on the outside of their respective signing personnel to assist in turning and revealing the text and pointing out the signing place.

In addition, the seating arrangement for group photos is also very particular. A group photo map can be arranged in advance, and when there are many people, a rack should be prepared. The host is generally in the middle for group photos, according to the protocol order, with the host's right hand as the upper, and the host and guest sides are arranged alternately.

In addition, the most common is the seating arrangement at the banquet. The seating arrangement at the banquet generally needs to grasp several techniques. One is that facing the door is the upper, which means that the position facing the main door of the room is the upper seat because its vision is wide. The second is that the farther is the upper, which means that the farther away from the main door of the room, the higher the position, and the closer to the room door, the lower the position. Staff and secretaries sit in positions close to the door to facilitate opening and closing the door, calling waiters to provide services, etc.

Formal banquets generally arrange seats, or only arrange seats for some guests, and others only arrange table numbers or sit freely. The table number must be indicated on the invitation, and there must be someone to guide on the spot to avoid confusion. Generally, the main host is in the position facing the room door, the deputy host is opposite the main host, the number one guest is on the right hand of the main host, the number two guest is on the left hand of the main host, the number three guest is on the right hand of the deputy host, the number four guest is on the left hand of the deputy host, and others can be at will. The above position of the main host is grasped according to the ordinary banquet, and if there are special factors in the scene, it should be handled according to the situation.

International habits are that the height of the table is determined by the distance from the main table, with the right being high and the left being low. When there are many tables, table number cards should be placed. At the same table, the height of the seat is determined by the distance from the host's seat. If the wife attends, usually the women are arranged together, that is, the main guest sits on the upper right of the male host, and the main guest's wife sits on the upper right of the hostess. For banquets with more than two tables, the position of the first host of other tables can be in the same direction as the host of the main table, or face the main table. In special cases, it can be handled flexibly.

If the status of the main guest is higher than the host, to show respect, the main guest can be placed in the host's position, while the host sits in the main guest's position, and the second host sits on the left side of the main guest. But it can also be arranged according to convention. If the main guest brings his wife, and the host's wife does not attend, usually other women of equivalent status can be invited to act as the second host. If no woman of appropriate status attends, the main guest and his wife can also be arranged on the left and right sides of the host. After the seats are arranged, start writing seat cards. The cards are written with a fountain pen or brush. For informal banquets and family banquets, seat cards are generally not placed, but the host also has a rough arrangement for the guests' seats.

In addition, the seating arrangement when riding in a car is also very particular, and it must be arranged differently according to the type of car. For example, the seating arrangement of a sedan. If there is a driver driving, the number one seat is on the right back of the driver, the number two seat is directly behind the driver, and the number three seat is beside the driver. If three people are sitting in the back row, the number three seat is in the middle of the back row.

If the host drives personally, the right side of the driver's seat is the first seat, the right side of the back row is the second, the left side is the third, and the middle seat of the back row is the last seat.

When the host and his wife drive, the host and his wife sit in the front seat, and the guest and his wife sit in the back seat. Men should serve their wives, and it is appropriate to open the car door to let the wife get in first, and then get in themselves.

If the host drives personally and there is only one guest, the guest should sit beside the host. If multiple people are sitting together, after the guest sitting in the front seat gets off halfway, the guest sitting in the back should change to sit in the front seat. This etiquette is the easiest to neglect.

(Chapter 2377: Preaching and Teaching)! ===== CHAPTER 4390 =====