Chapter 69: I Fight Suzumiya Haruhi? Are You Serious!

A hazy orange glow spread across the horizon, like a sheer veil covering the land, enveloping the county town—unnoticed, the night had nearly passed.

“I fight Suzumiya Haruhi?”

—That’s a joke.

Even if the Sentai teams, Ultraman, and Kamen Rider all teamed up, they still couldn’t match Suzumiya Haruhi, the Divine One—how could Jia Ji, a mere beginner in Beidou Shenquan, possibly defeat a Ultimate Girl who has reached the “Unspeakable, Untransmissible” realm?

You’d better find someone more capable.

The true request from the Information Integration Thought Entity is…

“We hope to observe you,” Nagato Yuki added. “Alongside Suzumiya Haruhi.”

They judged that Jia Ji, when with Suzumiya Haruhi, would reveal greater possibilities—including self-evolution.

But for Jia Ji, being observed alongside Suzumiya Haruhi—what does that mean?

It means he must face-to-face confront this Shijieji Bug, a girl who wields a life-editing tool yet remains unaware of it.

To be fair, Jia Ji has already described Suzumiya Haruhi’s nature: capricious, self-centered, unreasonable within limited bounds, the supreme example of selfishness, stubbornness, arrogance, and whim—self-aware yet unaware, seeking the irrational while clinging to the rational, a living paradox.

And that “limit” ranges from the smallness of this county town to the vastness of… the entire universe.

If you call her a perfect character, 1096 would surely leap out from some corner to protest violently—indeed, bluntly speaking, she sometimes does things that annoy others, with obvious personality flaws.

Yet she never does anything to be liked—she does it for herself.

When she sets a goal, she moves. When she has an idea, she acts. She possesses a force called Change, courage to face the unknown, explosive initiative—a girl who refuses to leave any regret in her past life.

Jia Ji wants to say Suzumiya is too troublesome, too yaka masi, too transcendent of common sense—but in truth, what he really wants is to meet her face-to-face, to clash with her!

“Amazing!”

A MAX-level challenge target.

Missing a confrontation with the team leader would be a lifelong regret!

Just like some hardcore otaku, with superhuman grit and perseverance, train with One Punch Man’s workout and ten thousand daily gratitude straight punches, ready at all times for sudden supernatural Jianglin events.

Before arriving in this world, Jia Ji had already longed to witness Suzumiya’s crazy antics and had pondered many strategies to face the team leader—now Nagato Yuki’s request amplified those thoughts, locking them firmly in his mind, growing like wild weeds.

So thrilling, so thrilling—even if I die, it’s worth it!

Honestly, if you can hold back from meeting Suzumiya Haruhi after coming here, go to a place called the Closed Space, let the thing inside come out, and you step in to replace it.

What if my identity as an otherworlder is discovered? What if I get caught?

We can’t rule out the possibility… that Jia Ji’s arrival in this world was caused by Suzumiya Haruhi searching for otherworlders.

Brought here because of her thoughts.

At this moment, you should all unconsciously recall Lie Haiwang’s famous saying—“I’ve always been indifferent to this kind of thing!”

So what if she finds out?

Worst case, she makes Jia Ji her guide to take her to another world, triggering an over-the-top twist like “Problem Children All Come From Other Worlds.”

Hmph, and Suzumiya Haruhi, as a little girl, has a soft heart—if I expose myself and kneel down begging her, saying “I’ll do anything!” she’d never let me die ten thousand times ten thousand times… right?

Even if Suzumiya Haruhi, in extreme rage, accidentally destroys the universe, it’s fine.

I can just teleport back to the Beidou world and become a runner—if Suzumiya Haruhi’s divine power is so great she can chase me across dimensions, Jia Ji might suffer a little, but the Beidou world might be saved in the process.

Either way, I can’t lose.

In short, being timid and hesitant—what kind of hero is that?

“Fine, I’m going!”

Jia Ji extended his hand forward.

His hand was noticeably wider and thicker than an average person’s, palms covered in calluses, muscles bulging visibly—clearly a martial artist.

The girl opposite also extended her hand; according to knowledge stored in her mind, this was a uniquely human gesture.

Jia Ji gently clasped Nagato Yuki’s outstretched hand, afraid he might squeeze too hard and break her slender fingers.

Cold and cool—an unprecedented, strange sensation, like an electric shock, raced from his arm’s nerves straight to his brain, making him snap his hand back instantly.

This might sound lewd, but this was Jia Ji’s first time touching a beautiful girl’s hand—what? That little Ai? That doesn’t count.

Can two fists capable of shattering rocks smashing together be called “touching a beautiful girl’s hand”?

Obviously, no!

But how, exactly, should he go about contacting Suzumiya Haruhi?

When Jia Ji asked this question…

Nagato Yuki blinked.

In the next instant, space around Jia Ji violently shifted—all objects blurred, then dissolved into countless golden strings of 0s and 1s.

These strings seemed to struggle as they rotated, weaving in orderly patterns around Jia Ji—and he felt something different happening to himself.

The loose martial arts robe he had been wearing had somehow transformed into a dark green sport jacket, with a white shirt underneath, perfectly fitted to his frame.

“It’s like a changing spell!”

From behind, Jia Ji in this outfit might even look slightly distinguished—he’d certainly trained his physique well.

“Could it be… I have to enroll in the county’s North High School?!”

“Studying is important.”

Nagato Yuki, the moment she joined the chat group, had acquired all recorded information, analyzed every member’s world, personality, history, and identity—she naturally knew Jia Ji’s background.

Everyone’s past holds things too fragile to examine closely—like chuuni black history or browser chat logs—but for Jia Ji, it was…

“I give up! Don’t check my academic records!”

Correct—he too was a “Three-No” type, but not the usual kind: no home, no family, no job. Worse still, he couldn’t even produce a single elementary school diploma.

But it’s just school—Nagato the Great Divine One can’t be wrong!

Jia Ji tugged at his collar, stood up, clenched his fists, eyes gleaming.

“I believe.”

“You’ll be right.”

Has Jia Ji ever been afraid?

Afraid of school? Or afraid of some mere high school girl?

In this tiny room where only aliens existed and only the Information Integration Thought Entity paid attention, the otherworldly martial artist, like Columbus with ambitions to discover a new continent, declared at this very moment: “Before me, she is the challenger!”

Stay tuned for the next episode—a person even rarer than Suzumiya Haruhi!

① Sentai, Ultraman, Kamen Rider can’t beat Suzumiya Haruhi—refers to the secret past where voice actress Hirano Aya allegedly abused Ren-shu, Takaguchi Shixian. Even funnier than Suzumiya’s abuse of Asahina.

② “I believe.”

② “You’ll be right.”

② From Suzumiya’s OP “Bōken desho desho?”

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(End of Chapter)