Chapter 295: Numb

Erin and Xuanche stared at each other, eye to eye.

After about half a minute, the small doll glanced at the few items the other had just pulled out: "That's all?"

Xuanche's face twitched slightly; his century-old Dao heart nearly wavered, but he still forced himself to nod: "Indeed, that's all."

Seeing this, Yu Sheng sighed and stepped forward to comfort him: "It's fine, it's fine. You did your best."

"Sigh, in the end, it's my own shallow knowledge and limited learning; I only know how to follow the book," Xuanche sighed, packing things away while speaking dejectedly, "There might be a way, but I simply can't think of it. After we return, I'll ask my master, or seek advice from the elders of our sect; perhaps there's still a chance for a turnaround."

"That works too," Yu Sheng nodded, looking utterly sincere, "Then I'll trouble you."

After this matter was discussed, it was already nearly noon.

Yu Sheng naturally invited the guest to stay for a meal—he didn't even struggle with the question of "whether a cultivator from Qianfeng Spirit Mountain eats food," since first, Xuanche had already downed a can of cola, and second, his own household had a cultivator who ate a lot at every meal.

Faced with the invitation, Xuanche didn't decline much; he was even quite curious about how these creatures in the room, who were definitely not "human" yet constantly "imitating" humans, lived their daily lives. When he agreed to stay for the meal, there was even a bit of the adventurous spirit of seeking the Great Dao in his heart.

Very soon, he would know that his choice to stay and broaden his horizons was correct.

Because the noon meal was cooked by Hu Li.

Probably feeling that a guest from the same "domain" had finally arrived, Hu Li volunteered to personally cook and show off a skill, to let the local immortal see what her hometown's traditional cuisine looked like.

Yu Sheng's first reaction was actually to intercept, since he knew that the appearance of that "Fox Stew" was somewhat cultish; serving a bowl of colorful, writhing things to scare the guest was secondary, but if Xuanche had a stress response, thinking it was some demon or monster brought out, and drew his sword to fight the noon meal to the death, that would be a huge mess—but he couldn't stop her.

Because Hu Li grabbed his hand and wagged her tail.

"You just spoil her," at the dining table, Erin Unit One, with a picture frame on her back, looked at Yu Sheng helplessly, "You give her whatever she wants, you agree to whatever she wants to do; you don't not know that the stuff she stews gets more and more bizarre. Once the kitchen door opens and she brings out the dish, you won't say a word."

"Not that extreme, not that extreme," Yu Sheng heard this and waved his hands repeatedly, explaining very seriously, "She lived too bitterly for the past few decades; I just want to treat her better now—and haven't I treated you well? I've even molded four bodies for you."

Erin pouted: "If you hadn't used materials bought from a ten-yuan store back then, I would believe you right now."

Xuanche had been curiously watching the commotion in the kitchen—the door was closed, and his divine sense, which could originally penetrate mountains and ridges, would be blocked here as soon as it encountered a closed door, so he didn't know what was happening inside; he could only hear the occasional clatter of dishes, interspersed with the crackling of flames rising and bursts of flashing light; to be honest, it didn't sound much like cooking, but calling it a battlefield might be a bit of an exaggeration...

After hesitating for a long time, he still looked up at Yu Sheng: "Is this... the sound of cooking?"

"It's her hometown's specialty dish, Fox Stew," Yu Sheng cheerfully explained to the guest, "It's fine, it's just loud; that's normal. She's probably reasoning with the dish right now; once the reasoning is settled, it can be served."

Xuanche: "...?"

Seeing this, Yu Sheng immediately added a few more words, as a precaution: "By the way, the appearance of what comes to the table might be a bit shocking; have a psychological preparation. But although it doesn't look good, the taste is actually quite nice, and I estimate it should be very beneficial for cultivators like you."

Listening, Xuanche became even more curious, and just as he was wondering how bad a dish could look, the kitchen door finally opened.

Without paying attention, he instinctively swept his divine sense over.

As a result, he immediately saw that blazing, unbearable nine-tailed fire, as if undergoing a violent energy reaction within, radiating an ever-rising, scorching spiritual light as it emerged.

Xuanche was stunned, hurriedly withdrew his divine sense, and then saw a large soup pot with a lid placed on the table—Yu Sheng stood up to help lift the lid, and amidst the rising steam, something else was also rising up.

After getting up in confusion to take a look into the pot, Xuanche's Dao heart shivered.

Standing there stunned for several seconds, he finally stared at Yu Sheng with wide eyes and, as if sleepwalking, hesitantly spoke: "It, it greeted me."

Yu Sheng thought for a moment: "Then this stew seems to be quite polite."

Xuanche: "...?"

If this pot of "dish" is stewed any longer, it's about to transform and ascend, right?!

While he was puzzled in his heart, Hu Li had already quickly scooped the food out of the pot, distributing it bowl by bowl, while muttering as she distributed: "One bowl for the benefactor, one for me, one for the guest, one for me, one for Erin, one pot for me..."

"Eat while it's hot," Yu Sheng, with a gentle smile on his face, nodded and said to the handsome young man across the table, "The taste is really quite good."

The master's command is upon me.

These big characters floated up in Xuanche's heart; in a daze, he seemed to see something familiar reflected in that bowl of slightly rippling, constantly bubbling soup; in a trance, he saw clearly—it was his master's copper leather belt.

Floating up along with the copper leather belt was also his master's earnest admonition before departure: "Xuanche, you must remember, the master you are going to see this time is one who fought and defeated the Dark Angel... Such a master must have strange and miraculous things around them; when you go, you must be bold yet careful. If the master bestows something upon you, you must accept it; it might be a great opportunity..." Thinking of this, he finally made up his mind, scooped a spoonful of the contents of the bowl, and put it into his mouth.

Seeing the handsome young man across the table take just one bite, Yu Sheng suddenly froze with a strange expression, motionless as if in meditation.

He waited for half a minute before finally couldn't help but speak: "What's wrong? Doesn't suit your taste?"

Xuanche then jolted awake, but his facial expression became even more strange; after holding it in for a long time, he finally blurted out: "... Better than what I refine."

Yu Sheng didn't understand for a moment: "... What?"

At this point, Xuanche could no longer bother to answer; another spoonful went down his throat, and in his mind, the scolding he received over the past century for misremembering the pill formula, the kneeling punishment for getting the timing wrong, the beating for missing the pill fire... all floated up again.

He looked down at the contents of his bowl, with only one thing puzzling him—since the pill's efficacy is so pure, how can it look like this?

And immediately after, his peripheral vision saw two shadows covered in golden radiance jump out from somewhere.

Looking up, he saw that they were indeed two golden-winged, jade-crowned, majestic, and overflowing with spiritual light, ah, nameless divine birds, jumping from Hu Li's shoulder onto the table, lowering their heads to peck at the "stew" in a small bowl.

He didn't recognize what kind of divine birds they were, but he suspected these two birds had a cultivation base even higher than the two immortal cranes his master kept in the sea of clouds—they just looked a bit strange in the eyes.

Carrying an aura of primordial purity.

!

Yu Sheng introduced them to the guest again: "These two are Bai Qie and Salt-Baked; they are Hu Li's pets."

Xuanche hesitated for a moment, looked up at the nine-tailed fox who had already started eating from the pot, and after a long while, squeezed a sentence out from between his back teeth: "The names... are very good."

Yu Sheng smiled a bit awkwardly, just hesitating whether to also tell the other party the true species of Bai Qie and Salt-Baked, when suddenly a "bang" sound came from somewhere.

The next second, he noticed the TV sound in the living room had stopped, the kitchen lights had gone out, the humming of the air conditioner had ceased, and even the refrigerator in the dining room had gone silent.

Erin, sitting cross-legged at the dining table, let out a startled "Oh my god" cry, directly bounced up, and fell off the edge of the table!

This sudden situation startled Yu Sheng; he quickly reached out to catch Erin first, but saw the small doll was completely dazed, and immediately after, he heard the sound of something falling in the living room.

A very "holy shit" intuition shot straight from the crown of his head to the tailbone; Yu Sheng instantly jumped up from his chair, ignoring the need to greet Xuanche, and turned to rush straight into the living room.

Then he saw the small doll lying on the ground next to the TV cabinet, smoking, and on the other side, the power strip that had already exploded.

Yu Sheng: "..."

He was completely dumbfounded; he ran over to the small doll in three or four steps, looking frantic: "You really went and gnawed on the electric wire!?"

At this time, Erin was probably still numb; her small face was blackened by soot, and her hair stood on end, but even so, she firmly raised her hand and made the middle finger gesture in front of Yu Sheng.

In the moment Yu Sheng was stunned, another Erin crawled out from between the nearby sofa and coffee table, looked up at him with glaring eyes: "You're the one who gnaws on electric wires! Your whole family gnaws on electric wires! I'm not stupid!"

Yu Sheng looked at the Erin who had crawled out from beside the sofa, raised his hand and pointed at the one still smoking on the ground: "Then what's your situation?"

"What's going on? Ask about that power strip you bought from the Five Yuan Store!" Erin said, furious. "I was just watching TV when it suddenly started smoking. I rushed over to unplug it, grabbed the cord, and—boom! I didn't even have time to dodge before I got a shock!"

Yu Sheng: "..."

All the complaints he'd been holding back instantly turned into embarrassment. He recalled that he had indeed bought a cheap power strip for the living room, and Erin had complained about it two days ago, telling him to buy a new one and replace it ASAP. He had forgotten...

Thinking this, he quickly picked up Erin, who was lying on the ground smoking, and grabbed a tissue from nearby to wipe the little doll's face. However, just as he was about to say something to ease the awkwardness, the doll in his arms suddenly moved, raising a hand to block his action: "Wait."

Yu Sheng: "What's wrong?"

Erin (Promax Smoked Black Gold Limited Edition, 66.6 cm) wore a strange expression—well, probably a strange expression, since she was so blackened from the smoke it was hard to tell—raised her wrist to stretch, then jumped down from Yu Sheng's arms and looked down at her own body.

"... It's charged."

Yu Sheng: "... What?!"

(End of this chapter)