Chapter 1555: Water Lord's Loyal Minister (Beginning of Month Asking for Monthly Tickets, Two-in-One)

"Boom!"

Great waves splashed in all directions, vast surges churning.

"Water Lord, spare my life!"

General Yuan plunged headfirst into the water, bubbling blub-blub, "Little Turtle me was young and ignorant, momentarily muddle-headed, offended the King, but I have Old Fish Peng Ze to support above, and turtle eggs to hatch below, absolutely cannot————"

"Hahaha!"

Liang Qu laughed to the sky, cutting off the words, vigorously patting the old turtle's head, "Ay, Old Yuan ah Old Yuan, look, just joking with you, why so nervous? I thought we were good buddies. Can joke with each other, how come anxious all of a sudden. Making me embarrassed too, too disappointing, hurts feelings, isn't it."

"Yes yes yes————"

General Yuan sweated profusely, shivered, and dared not speak nonsense again.

"Ay, really is————" Liang Qu clasped hands behind his back and sighed, "In a flash so many years have passed, time flies,, old杂毛, how long have we known each other?"

The old turtle trembled with fear, walking on thin ice: "Sixteen years."

"Sixteen years————not bad not bad, remember quite clearly." Liang Qu paced around, gazed at Shou Mountain, landed on the peak, picked up a stone, knocked and tapped against the rock face, changing the subject, "Advancing in parallel, how is the cultivation of the Four Gates and Seven Paths of Law coming along?"

"Almost Entering Zhen Xiang." General Yuan answered honestly.

"Yo he, progress not bad?"

General Yuan rubbed his claws together, smiled obsequiously: "Where where, all thanks to the Water Lord's blessing."

"What blessing? Chow Tai Fook?"

General Yuan froze, brain frantically spinning, quick-witted in crisis: "Water Lord defeated the Whale Emperor, crushed Great Li's Taizu, all living beings under heaven escaped disaster; without the Water Lord, this old turtle would have long perished in the Yellow Springs, made into turtle jelly, how could there be today!"

"Turtle jelly?" Liang Qu's eyes lit up, "That's a fine thing for nourishing yin and moistening dryness; if your thousand-plus-year-old turtle were made into it, extraordinary! A spiritual creature, Eying said she's been busy lately with internal heat, lips even grew sores."

General Yuan wished he could slap himself, why mention this thing for no reason.

Damn it, that wretched dragon with internal heat and lip sores, right.

"Water Lord and Queen are true immortals who feed on qi and mist, what they use is essence of myriad myriad years of heaven and earth, how could they look up to my little years————"

"Audacious!" Liang Qu shouted sternly.

The whole turtle General Yuan jumped in fright, shuddered violently, heaving huge waves; the monkey troops on Shou Mountain all left the ground, collectively weightless.

"Water Lord, spare my life! Little Turtle knows his error!"

"Still overstepping! Do you know where?"

"Ah?"

"The two words 'Water Lord', are they for you to call! Back then fighting the flood dragon, sitting on the fence, now want to be my minister? You have such gall! Such ambition!" Liang Qu pulled out a booklet page, held it high, "See? I've recorded it all for you! You traitor, spy, big warlord, ambitious man, surrender faction, big bully, black-listed figure, black Licentiate, black hand, black gangster, chameleon!"

General Yuan's head heavy, tears streaming: "Don't dare, absolutely don't dare, little turtle can't bear it, Great Sage withdraw your divine ability, spare my life!"

"Roar roar roar!"

Mountain demons on Shou Mountain rioted jumping wildly, the leader pulled out a rusty cleaver from who knows where dredged, aimed at the old turtle's neck, sharpening knife eagerly, chopped down on the head.

Sparks flew in all directions.

"So, what should you call me?" Liang Qu vigorously patted General Yuan's head.

"King of Huai?"

"Hm? What did you call?"

"Huai Immortal?"

"I tell you, today you leave the Jianghuai Great Marsh, you call me Huai Immortal, I won't pick your fault; entered the Jianghuai Great Marsh, you say what should you call me?"

"I, I don't know ah."

General Yuan bewildered, completely didn't know what trick the monkey was playing.

"Slap!"

Head ached.

"Call Daddy!"

"Daddy, dear Daddy!"

"Heh, you this turtle son not stupid heh."

General Yuan's form huge, skull equally broad, yet let one hand press it bobbing; he grinned along, then sharp pain, fiercely ate a violent chestnut-knock.

"Daddy, why hit me?"

"You cursed me in your heart!"

"?"

"Still dare talk back, I see your wings hardened, wolf heart dog lungs, dead duck mouth hard! Little rabbit scoundrel, conscience all eaten by dogs!"

You motherfucker!

"Still cursing! Still cursing?" Liang Qu rolled the booklet page into a tube, kept knocking on the head.

This monkey really has mind-reading?

General Yuan furious, simply tore off the facade, turtle claws struck water: "You this plague-stricken monkey, set a trap for old man, I'm not serving anymore, die or live give a quick one!"

"Ha! I knew you long had disloyal heart! Day I return to the world, all treacherous ministers must die! Today this King will make you into turtle jelly! Come monkeys, start the pot!"

"Roar roar roar!"

Mountain demons set up pot, made fire, chopped wood boiled water, chiseled turtle back.

"Tiger poison does not eat its child!" General Yuan slapped water cursing loudly.

"Rebellious son! Disregards turtle ethics, today cleaning the clan, eat my Poison Dragon Drill!" Fingers curled to a point, Liang Qu forcefully knocked the forehead.

"Joy and anger unpredictable, toying with ministers, fundamentally no Water Lord like you!"

"You're just afraid!"

"Eh, where's the Elder? Just now still in the room? Grand ceremony about to start."

Long Yao, Long Li carrying pearl jade ornaments walked in briskly, looking left and right.

"Left?"

Long Eying turned her head, momentarily startled; she could not sense Liang Qu's position, yet she noticed the Elemental General Peng Ze had rushed over and stopped in place, and instantly understood.

"Nothing, your king went off to have fun."

In the Long Gong square, fire trees and silver flowers formed the boundary, left and right divided into two halves, one half with water, the other half open-air.

Dragon people wielding halberds, shark people wielding music, scattered in the air.

One hundred twenty drums, seventy gold cymbals, constituting the full ensemble.

Long Sect Yin raised his head and looked around.

Three hundred, three hundred——

He again could not help but burst into tears.

Xu Zishuai looked left and right, then let Yang Xu pat him on the back of the head, immediately sitting up straight.

The three furnaces, seated in the upper left, followed by the Holy Emperor, the Tribal Chief, the Khan King, Su Gu Mountain, the Old Monk, Yang Dongxiong and others, all seated here; further back were the various martial saints, beyond the three directions, the secluded ancient kings of small states all came in person; Old Dragon Lord, Mirage Dragon, White Long Wang, Mountain Long Wang, seated in the upper right, followed by the Whale King, the Sea Kelp King——

All martial saints and demon kings of the world, without exception, fell.

Today's scene, all the "River-Middle Stones" gathered together; otherwise, if only one or two were scattered outside, lonely and isolated, it would indeed be embarrassing, so let the Huai King remember what to do?

Crossing the square, inside the Long Gong.

Frog King, Turtle King, Sea Fangzhu——the assembled beast worthies differed from the spectators, all seated here, yet those standing at the very front were not these demon kings.

The Old Toad stood at the upper left, eyes closed, head raised forty-five degrees.

The Fat Fish stood at the upper right, following suit with head raised forty-five degrees.

Compared to the massive demon kings, two round, plump little trinkets, standing apart on either side of the throne, facing each other from afar, dignified and lofty in bearing.

The Old Toad opened his eyes, glared at the Fat Fish.

The Fat Fish shrank his head, took tiny hurried steps, quickly moved two steps to the left, and along with it shoved the "cannot move", round head, and fists backward together, breaking formation.

Only then did the Old Toad nod in satisfaction.

What frog, and it's in the same row!

The Fish King restrained his excitement, gazing toward the yellow sands on either side and the nearby yellow sands where they met the sea, demon kings, pointing excitedly: "That is my clan's demon king, my clan's demon king!"

The demon kings' hearts jolted.

Is the Fish clan graced with two supreme ones?

The Whale King likewise wore a smile, looking left and right: "That is my clan's demon king, my clan's demon king!"

Those nearby were startled.

Is the Tiger-Whale clan so illustrious?

At the boundary between the two regions, demon kings who could hear both sides' remarks felt slightly strange.

Behind the demon king ranks, the Thorny One raised his head, chest out: "That is my clan's demon king!"

"Your clan's demon king, then why no thorns?" a great demon fox questioned doubtfully.

"My clan's demon king suffered a hard fate in youth." The Thorny One lowered his head, tears streaming, fish fins slapping the ground: "In former days, the flood dragon was lawless——"

The listening great demon smacked his lips twice.

"Didn't your Spiny Porpoise clan used to work under the flood dragon? Every time you charged forward to show loyalty, and now the flood dragon is lawless again, you've been waiting a long time."

Nearly everyone had arrived.

Only one, wandering at the entrance to the Jianghuai Great Marsh, the "River-Middle Stone" came late, swaying gently.

Mist hazy and obscure, the mountain peak burst forth from the fog.

Inside the venue, not a few demon kings and martial saints glanced sideways.

Peng Ze demon chieftain, Elemental General!

In the river mist, the turtle shadow gradually became clear, and everyone was startled.

The bruised and swollen-faced Elemental General poked his head out, saw the great demon looking up below, and spat: "What are you looking at? Never seen a demon king?"

"Elemental General, why do you look like this? Who struck you?" the Whale King asked.

"How am I speaking?" the Elemental General resentfully replied: "What 'who struck me'? I revere the Water Lord, heard the discourse on the Dao, Peng Ze set out, just thinking of seeing the Empress ascend the throne, discussing the Dao through rainbows, I was overjoyed, came too hastily on the road, and fell!"

The Holy Emperor inwardly wondered, thought it over.

"Could it not have been a monkey that did this?"

Unbothered by the fish's glances around, the Elemental General looked left and right, found his body too large, three circles inside and three outside, too lazy to squeeze in, simply found a spot outside and sat down.

Soon after.

A sharp explosive sound rang out, a golden thread traced in the sky, coiling and entwining.

Everyone froze, only the Elemental General rejoiced.

Treasure.

Its treasure!

The Time Bug carried a tattered cowhide map, simple in form, yet revealing complex emotions, scanned the surroundings, and landed on Longevity Mountain.

The long wind howled, full of vicissitudes.

The world, again defiled.

"Ay, my little ancestor, old ancestor, good ancestor, you've finally returned! Look how thin you've become." The Elemental General overjoyed, immediately turned, ordered the mountain sprite: "Quick, go fry two dishes for the little ancestor! More meat, more spice!"

The Mountain Sprite King coldly snorted, arms crossed over his chest, standing like a standard, head raised forty-five degrees. The mountain sprites behind him were no different, standing in a line.

The Elemental General flew into a rage: "Plague monkey, who fed you, gave you drink? What did that monkey give you? And again made me do this!"

"Bang bang bang!"

The turtle's claws tapped, the mountain sprite tumbled and fell, the monkey troop scattered in all directions, running four ways, those picking vegetables picked vegetables, those with hot pots tended hot pots.

The Mountain Sprite King produced a stone tablet, used talc to write and draw.

In a corner of the Long Gong, the Golden-Haired Monkey King gazed at the Shanxiao and laughed heartily.

High noon.

"Hum—"

The Jiao people carried and raised the horn; a massive sound wave rolled out, distorting the waves.

Inside and out, all was solemn and still.

The nine-bay grand hall: golden scales for tiles, silver marrow for steps, coral for railings.

Dragon banners, cloud streamers, golden melons, yue-axes, chaotian, trust streamers, leopard-tail spears——

The first drum roll sounded; the water tribes fell silent.

The second drum roll sounded; the hundred officials arrayed in ranks.

The third drum roll sounded; bells and chimes rang together, and heaven and earth cleared as one.

The water rippled faintly; scales and armor gleamed with light.

The Dragon People all looked north.

Quan Linghan took the lead; the Director of Music prostrated and raised the baton, struck the zhu, and in the pitch of Guxian performed the "Chapter of Grand Peace."

The Old Dragon Lord's gaze was complex, looking at the towering Long Gong, at the fire trees and silver flowers, at the familiar Dragon People attendants who had died and been dragged out again; he felt a stifling sense that he had toiled a lifetime only for it all to be taken away by his son-in-law.

The Mirage Dragon surveyed his surroundings, gripping his dragon claws tight; his heart still churned with disbelief that he could stand here so vividly alive.

The Sacred Emperor, the Tusi, and the Khan King drew a deep breath and sat even more upright. The Empress's enthronement was not today's main event, yet it could not be lightly underestimated in any way.

Rear hall.

Lady Xu parted her hair to left and right at the temples.

Long Xiti adjusted her hairpin properly.

Long Eying's mood was slightly tense; she clenched her five fingers into a fist.

"Don't panic. The ones who should be nervous are them. First time attending a Dragon-to-Rainbow wife's enthronement — let them open their eyes. If anyone thinks something's off, I'll shave them with a brick."

A voice suddenly sounded by her ear; Long Eying couldn't help but laugh, then immediately pressed her lips together, drew a deep breath, dragged her mianfu, and stepped out in time with the drumbeats.

The eaves soared high; shadows were sharp.

Atop her head the mian crown; twelve tassels of white jade beads hung down, level with her brows, veiling her eyes.

Dark robes and red skirt, embroidered with the twelve chapters.

The great sash cinched her waist; the jade pendant rested at center; red silk shoes trod the steps, hidden beneath her skirt. Long Yanrui held the censer; Long Binglin kept hand on sword at her side; Long Yao and Long Li each bore ritual implements, eyes lowered, brows drooped.

Where is my husband?

Long Eying thought.

She gazed into the far distance.

She did not see him in the grand hall, nor on the plaza, yet she knew Liang Qu would certainly come — only she simply could not find him no matter what.

Suddenly, she spotted him. On the boundary where the jade steps rose and fell unevenly, light and shadow overlapping, a figure loomed up, as if standing right beside her.

Long Eying smiled faintly.

Not a bit surprising.

"Truly beautiful."

Liang Qu watched Eying walk out of the grand hall, watched the crimson ritual shoes appear and disappear, gave a hey laugh, pressed his big hand on the ridge-beast suanni, plopped down onto the roof ridge with legs splayed, and looked down on everyone standing ramrod straight.

No one deemed it discourteous.

Heaven: neither permissible nor impermissible, neither absent nor not absent.

The rites and music eased slightly.

"Bow!"

The Master of Ceremonies Long Chen sang in a resonant voice that pierced straight through the water waves.

Quan Linghan switched to performing the "Chapter of Celebrated Peace."

Three hundred Entering Zhen Xiang Dragon People and great yao dragon sturgeons all bowed together, foreheads touching jade stone.

Behind them the Dragon People, Jiao people, water beasts——ten thousand myriad beings, stretching in unbroken swaths, bowed and bared their backs, like leaves flipping in the wind, rustling and shifting, surging waves rising.

The fat fish lay flat with both whiskers and both fins; the old toad held his frog head high, specially permitted not to bow.

"Present the treasures!"

The old toad gathered his long robe, like a ball rolling along the ground, and presented a jade casket.

"Receive the treasures!"

Long Eying accepted the jade casket with both hands.

"Bow"

All water beasts under heaven bowed again.

The Three Immortals nodded.

The Sacred Emperor, the Khan King, and the Tusi bowed together.

"This female emperor is more imposing than the Great Shun Emperor."

The Khan King thought.

When the one beside me ascended, he wasn't even qualified to have him attend the ceremony, let alone the Three Immortals together — although in the middle Linchuan was swapped for the Dragon Elephant, the essence didn't change; speaking of it, he can even ride the Dragon-to-Rainbow at night, even more formidable.

The "Zhu Lu" music rose.

Cloud trays bore it forth; Long Zong Yin unfolded the edict: "By the Heaven and Earth's Storehouse Master who bears the Mandate, the Emperor decrees:

I, of meager virtue, reverently accept Heaven's Mandate, inherit the Dragon lineage, yet fail to continue the ancestral temples. Deeply aware of the weight of Heaven and Earth's cherished mandate, the difficulty of the altar of the soil and grain's entrustment, looking at this insignificant body, I fear I cannot prevail.

On the first day of the first year of Longhuang, I respectfully announce to Heaven and Earth, the Ancestral Temple, and the Altars of Soil and Grain, and ascend the Emperor's throne. From this day forward, I revere Heaven and emulate the ancestors, nurture the myriad people, pardon faults and forgive sins, and rejoice together in renewal.

(Text ends mid-sentence in source)

Let all my dragon-folk, sturgeon-lineage, water-tribes, and mountain-marsh spirits each abide by their proper station and together enjoy the harmony of a flourishing age. Proclaim this within and without, that all may hear and know.

Respect this.

As the edict fell, those above and below the hall cried in unison: "Long live Our Emperor, ten thousand years!"

"Long live Our Emperor, ten thousand years!"

A thousand layers of surging waves rose with the sound, crashing through the cloud-mist.

The Empress!

The Dragon Emperor!

Long You clapped vigorously, then quietly sidled up to Long Xiti's ear: "Lady, you say Eying is the Empress — then am I the Retired Emperor? And you the Empress Dowager?"

Long Xiti glared at Long You: "Shut your mouth. Such talk is forbidden from now on."

"Just chatting—"

"No chatting either. Spouting nonsense — I'll have your worthy son-in-law stuff you back into the netherworld!"

Long You: "—..."

Long Chen's steps were light and floating.

Long Shuo watched the girl he had never seen before wearing the ceremonial crown-robes, and felt life was like a dream, an illusion, a bubble, a shadow.

"How wonderful, Elder Sister."

"Yes, Younger Sister."

Azure and pink wrists intertwined, pressing together — Hai Fangzhu and Hai Yun offered heartfelt blessings.

"Love that won't be eaten." Hai Yun yearned.

"Not necessarily won't be 'eaten'." Hai Fangzhu patted.

"Ah?"

The old toad flexed its frog toes.

Heaven is vast, earth is vast, the Water Lord is greatest — the Treasure Fish eats three at a meal; next come the Queen and the State Preceptor, equal in rank.

But the male frog is larger than the female frog, so it is greater than the Empress!

Ribbit ribbit ribbit — it has unified the Jianghuai; what decree should it issue later?

Convene a Frog Selection Assembly, summon all the little female frogs under heaven to the Dragon Court to bear it superior offspring; or enfeoff Frog Kings, grant it half the Jianghuai; or hold a Flower-Planting Assembly — all great yaos and yao kings, go plow fields for it; the sixth month is the perfect time to plant lotus, plant great big lotuses across the Jianghuai.

Let the Jianghuai encircle the land!

"Ribbit—mmph!"

The old toad covered its mouth, rolling its frog eyes.

"First year of the Dragon Emperor, first day of the first month: Long Eying ascended the throne in the Long Gong Main Hall. Days prior the State Preceptor was dispatched to sacrifice to Heaven, Earth, the Ancestral Temple, and the Altars of Soil and Grain; on the day the honor guard was arrayed, the suspended music set up, at the third drum the hundred officials took their places, three kneelings and nine kowtows, receiving the seal, promulgating the edict, and receiving court congratulations all according to ritual. Within and without the Jianghuai, the four directions came to court, the water-tribes all gathered — a盛况 of figures unseen in hundreds of years—"

The historian recorded.

The enthronement ceremony thus concluded a stage.

Yet everyone remained seated upright, none departing.

Discoursing on the Dao at the Rainbow Transformation!

Long Eying surveyed the world, turned toward the rear, and bowed deeply.

Suoli Weng, Zhang Longxiang, and Beiting Xian likewise rose and returned the salute.

The Wu Sheng and the Yao Kings stood in a dense row, rising together.

Shi Chong chewed peanuts listlessly, eating one and dropping one; General Yuan's huge turtle claw pinched the small porcelain bottle, precisely filling the thumb-sized cup with nectar; seeing this, he hurriedly pricked up his ears.

"Shhh!"

The scene shifted.

Before everyone's eyes it suddenly brightened; when they came to, they found white clouds flowing all around, the sky tile-blue — they had long since left the Long Gong and arrived at a cloud-borne immortal island!

"Eh? Where's General Yuan?" The Whale King looked back.

"Damn it, you cursed Bai Mao monkey! A Dao discourse and you leave me behind?"

The Long Gong plaza, teeming with heads a moment ago, was instantly empty — only two river otters sweeping the steps remained; General Yuan smashed the small porcelain bottle in rage, frantic with anger.

"Clatter!"

Scarface smashed a broom onto General Yuan's forehead, holding up a small wooden placard.

"Littering, fine, five hundred taels?" General Yuan recited word by word, smoke rising from his seven orifices, angrily raising his turtle claw to grind the shattered porcelain into powder, "Yellow-mouthed little monkey, insulting this old turtle — if this can be borne, what cannot! Waaah—"

"Shhh."

The view shifted.

Jade reflected light, auspicious clouds flowed, sound trickled quietly from on high.

"Right, the grand ceremony is over; next we begin class. Today I'll lecture on the basic principles of the Four Barriers Seven Paths' Rainbow Transformation, and the preliminary conception of the Heavenly Court and Earthly Office — we'll start with Chapter One, Section One, First Sub-point—"

General Yuan hastily withdrew his claw, sat upright, solemn to the utmost.

"If not for deep affection, why would the King jest with me! Hahaha, the Water Lord is loyal!"

Shi Chong grew ever more sorrowful, dead drunk, swaying east and west.

Suddenly a turtle claw reached out, flicking away the nectar.

"When the Water Lord speaks, how can you be so disrespectful!" General Yuan rebuked, "No drinking honey water during class!"

A sharp, explosive cry!

"—Last row, that big turtle, not the Turtle King, not talking about you, yes, you, the one carrying a mountain — no whispering in class! No bizarre attire! I'm only lecturing for one double-hour; do you know, you waste one person half a cup of tea, ten people and a whole double-hour is gone!"

Everyone snapped their heads back in unison, glaring.

Who the hell calculates like you?

Rainbow Transformation time is different from everyone else's, is it?

General Yuan's anger rose from his heart, malice grew at his gallbladder's edge; fiercely he extended his claw, tearing through the long sky, and in one grasp seized the Time Worm's pointed beak, pinching off its violent shrieking.

"Understood!"

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