Chapter 11: Heartbroken, She Changes!

Waking up, Feng Yan and Chen Hao continued like this back to the classroom, sat in their seats, they couldn't leave this game. Or rather, could they forget her? Feng Yan felt a bit lost, Feng Yan asked Chen Hao: "Are you sure?" "I don't know, but if we don't try, there's definitely no chance!" Chen Hao said.

"Tonight we have off, we can go out and play!" "Really? That's not bad!" "Finally off, I'm exhausted." Feng Yan heard their quiet discussion, heard the news of the day off, which also made him happy, "Really? That's truly good news, we have off." Feng Yan laughed, thinking in his heart.

Wang Wan Ting looked at the notebook, she had looked over it again and again during night self-study, she clearly knew in her heart that this matter should have an end, but, what should she do exactly? Between the two, someone always gets hurt, she doesn't want anyone to be hurt because of her, so she also fell into deep thought. Yang Xin came over, saw the notebook Feng Yan gave Wang Wan Ting, opened it, he had a grim face, after flipping a few pages, he returned the notebook to her, and said to her: "Your own matters, you settle them yourself. Besides, I am your boyfriend!" After saying that, Yang Xin left, Wang Mu was still at his seat, not knowing what to do, Feng Yan had also been one of her best friends, when she was at her most miserable he gave her encouragement, she values her grades so much, but Feng Yan seems not to worry at all, sometimes seeing him also studying hard, yet still unable to improve grades, "Him, what exactly should I do?" Wang Wan Ting felt terrible, she had no idea.

Feng Yan awaited a good story, together with her, yet still not wanting to ruin the friendship, bit by bit, they didn't know what to do, one longed to return to the former close friendship with her, the other had already become a boyfriend-girlfriend relationship, once good friends were instantly shattered into pieces, impossible to mend, Feng Yan thought of these, his heart felt bitter, he still couldn't let go, that was a friend, once the best friend, he wanted to shout out loud, but couldn't, Feng Yan imagined people putting on an honest front, unaware he also wanted to be as wild as them, go crazy and noisy like them, then say to others: "Look, they can do it, so can I!" But he ultimately couldn't do that, he felt it improper, and felt that such him, was he still himself? He just acted like that, putting on an honest front? Perhaps just on the surface, but he simply didn't want another him to appear.

Chen Hao looked at Feng Yan and asked, "What are you thinking?" "I'm wondering if I did something wrong," Feng Yan said. Chen Hao stopped continuing, he knew what he was saying and what he was thinking, but he still couldn't understand, why exactly, revenge? Or sorrow, being deceived by someone is already very upsetting, yet he forces himself not to let others notice? Whether to say he's strong or pitiful, Chen Hao knows that after sending the things this time she will receive them, but he also doesn't dare tell him this is also his last conversation with her. Chen Hao asked him: "Do you think you might succeed?" "I know the chance is almost zero, but I don't know why, I just think, what if…" Feng Yan's words trailed off, he couldn't go on, he deeply knew this was him deceiving himself, these he himself couldn't even believe! Feng Yan shook his head, sat down, gave a bitter smile: "Am I still a pitiful person?" The class bell rang, the girls behind also stopped speaking, everyone fell silent, the classroom had not a single sound, Feng Yan looked at the blackboard, his heart also didn't know what he was thinking.

After evening classes ended, everyone was rushing to leave the school gate, how they missed the big beds at home. Feng Yan alone slowly packed his things, he wasn't in a hurry to compete with them for the time to leave the gate, he slowly packed his things, returned to the dormitory and picked up his backpack, doing this slowly, slowly, perhaps then he could forget some things. After finding the car, he saw the scenery outside the window: rice had already been harvested, the paddies left with the cut stalks, leaves began to turn yellow, when the wind blew, they slowly fell, the yellow leaves drifted slowly in the wind, the water in the ditch flowed gently, leaves landing on it were slowly washed away, Feng Yan watched this scene and thought: "Is life also like this? Like those falling leaves? No, humans aren't falling leaves, nor could they be; autumn wind blowing leaves is a rule, an inescapable fate, but we are humans—how could we willingly let others arrange our lives for us?"

Feng Yan returned home, though it had only been half a month since he last came back, yet he felt as if they'd been apart for ages. He saw the big tree he once liked, only its rings remained; the grove where people once cooled off in the scorching heat was now just a pile of stumps! He didn't want to think further, he quickened his steps home. That day the teacher said to him: "Feng Yan, you're smart, but you haven't applied it to your studies." "I don't want to read dead books." Feng Yan mustered the courage at that moment and blurted it out; the teacher said nothing more, slowly returning to the classroom. Feng Yan also slowly returned to the classroom, expecting? Indeed, he was very much looking forward to it, yet he also felt uneasy inside, afraid this would be their last meeting. Until that moment, Feng Yan's phone rang, he answered, the voice on the other end gave him hope, it said: "Is this Feng Yan?" "It's me." Feng Yan replied, "Let's meet after we're back at school." The other side continued, then hung up.

The Feng Yan on the other end of the phone was full of joy; for the two days since he returned home he couldn't sleep, each day he was in a highly spirited state, he had been waiting for this day to arrive for a long time, and this day finally came! How could this not make one happy? He sent a message to Chen Hao, feeling that everything was turning for the better, Chen Hao told Feng Yan: "Forget it, there's no hope left." Feng Yan didn't understand why Chen Hao would say that, but he still told him he could definitely succeed this time, saying: "I haven't even tried yet, how would you know what comes next?" Chen Hao hung up, Feng Yan lay on the bed, waiting for tomorrow afternoon's meeting with her.

The next afternoon, Feng Yan arrived early at the station, waiting for the train to come, Feng Yan imagined that moment, he felt it was a good thing, also a beginning perhaps. He completely didn't notice, a hand from behind directly slapped onto him, Feng Yan was startled almost losing his soul, turning his head he blurted: "I said Lin Xiyan, not to scare me like this, almost scared to death." Lin Xiyan saw Feng Yan's expression just then, suppressing a smile, she said: "You're lost in thought, I don't want to disturb you. The train's here, get on first." So Feng Yan and Lin Xiyan boarded the train, just as before, Feng Yan sat by the window, Lin Xiyan sat beside him, after sitting down, Lin Xiyan asked him: "What good thing has you so engrossed?" "This? I'll tell you next time I come back, for now keep it secret." Feng Yan said, Lin Xiyan looked at him with a look of contempt, then added: "I don't see it as anything good either." "How can you look at me like that, I'm an honest kid." Feng Yan said, "Never mind, let's sleep first." After saying that, Feng Yan leaned against the window and fell asleep.

Lin Xiyan watched him, watched him asleep, she softly said: "Someone is pursuing me, I still need to ask your opinion—what should we do?" After saying that, she also slowly leaned against Feng Yan's body and fell asleep, until the ticket collector's voice sounded as they were about to disembark, Feng Yan slowly woke up, he saw Lin Qin asleep on his shoulder, not knowing what to do, he whispered: "I also don't know how to talk to you." As soon as he finished, Lin Qin slowly woke up, she said: "I need to get off." Feng Yan got off with her, escorted her to school, along the way they didn't speak, they waited for the other to speak, but between them it was as if there were a prohibition, finally, before she reached school, Feng Yan finally spoke, saying: "I don't know how to say it, but I still need to say, we are friends, right?" "Mm, very good friends." Lin Xiyan slowly walked into the school gate.

When Feng Yan reached the school gate, Wang Wan Ting was already waiting there, Feng Yan said to her: "Let's talk at the playground, this place isn't for talking." "Mm," Wang Wan Ting replied, Feng Yan and Wang Mu walked together toward the playground, Feng Yan stopped and said: "What's the matter, speak." Wang Mu said: "I have a boyfriend." "I know." Feng Yan said. "You, why?" Wang Wan Ting asked, "Is it necessary? Why ask why, I came here also to experience some things, go through some things, but this also makes me feel terribly pitiful." Feng Yan replied. "Alright, then I'll say it straight: I have one, you don't come bother me anymore, I won't like you, this time it was also Yang Xin who sent me." "Hahahaha," Feng Yan laughed, then said: "Turns out it was all me being overly sentimental, sorry for the bother, I'll leave first." Feng Yan walked off alone, before leaving he shouted loudly: "Don't dream of youth, wake to white‑hair parting. Originally a sentimental youth, now a pitiful state, from morning past events, past old feelings, today forever gazing."

Wang Wan Ting stood where she was, she so wanted to call out to her, watching Feng Yan slowly drift away, she knew that their friendship, or rather Feng Yan's affection for her, were slowly crumbling, and now they were completely shattered, she only hoped that these two people would not become enemies.

The wind brushed Feng Yan's cheek, Wang Wan Ting's words completely crushed his affection for her into powder, which the wind blew away, leaving not a trace.

"Now everything is over, her, what does she have to do with me from now on?" Feng Yan felt heart‑broken, yet his face still bore a smile, he gave a bitter laugh and said: "What comes after, what does it have to do with me?"

"What's wrong?" Chen Hao asked him, "Nothing, I've untied this knot." Feng Yan replied. "How's it going?" "All good, let's just have fun and study well."

"What's wrong?" Chen Hao asked him. "Nothing, I've untied this heart knot." Feng Yan answered. "How's the situation?" "It's fine now; we should just have fun and study well."