Chapter 36: Brushing Past

The main street was crowded, bustling beyond compare, as if a festival were being celebrated. Even though the war situation was extremely dire, it still appeared as prosperous and peaceful as it seemed on the surface.

Common folk are probably the most easily satisfied crowd! As long as they're not in the worst circumstances, they strive to live, hustling for firewood, rice, oil, and salt—ordinary yet fulfilling.

All the way, we mostly heard Jin Hong chattering nonstop, while Second Sister wore a smiling face, occasionally replying to him, occasionally turning shy and smiling at us.

Xin Hui perhaps guessed that I had already laid my cards on the table with Fu Junmo, so she kept a wary expression all the way, never daring to meet my gaze. Xin Luo, on the other hand, held my hand tightly the whole way; her face was calm, but her eyes shone.

Only when looking at Fu Junmo did her eyes carry thick vigilance and fear.

As for Second Brother and Fu Junmo, they were basically silent the whole way. Second Brother was shy; the other one—his thoughts are inscrutable, I'm too lazy to bother.

"Ying Ruo, Yin Mo!" Jin Hong suddenly halted, turning back, "We've walked a long way and our stomachs are empty; why not sit down and have something?" He pointed to the inn ahead, which bore a hanging sign reading "Wanderer of the Ends".

"Ying Ruo, this 'Tianya Restaurant' in Yecheng is also the finest tavern in Ting Country. Yet its most famous thing here is neither wine nor any dish—can you guess what it is?"

He stared at me with bright eyes, a look that seemed to say you'd surely like it, and I couldn't help but laugh, "Is it the flower-steamed brew?" Nowadays almost everyone in the Xiang residence knows that Miss Lan Si is crazy about flower-steamed brew, so what's so hard to guess?

Jin Hong wore a look of disappointment, "Ying Ruo, you're really good, guessed it right at once. But that makes it no fun!" The crowd burst into laughter.

Upon entering the restaurant, the grandeur was indeed extraordinary, not at all inferior to Yin Country's "Wangjiang Tower". Jin Hong swaggered to the counter and shouted, "Owner, we want the elegant room on the third floor."

The owner, having been in Yecheng so long, naturally had sharp eyes; seeing our impressive bearing, he hurried forward, smiling and bowing, "Gentlemen, I'm truly sorry, the third‑floor elegant room has been booked today. Perhaps you could deign to take the second floor..."

Seeing Jin Hong's hostile expression about to flare, I tugged him and smiled, "Fine, please take us to the second floor."

Jin Hong snorted, then muttered, "Bring out all the flower-steamed brew you have here, understand? No missing items..."

The innkeeper, whose smile had been plastered on his face, suddenly stiffened, his expression turning sour as he whispered, "Sir, what an ill‑timing! All our flower-steamed brew has been booked by the third‑floor guests today!"

"What did you say!" Jin Hong's face turned iron‑blue; he yanked the innkeeper's clothing, indifferent to the crowd, and barked, "Do you know who I am? How dare you play me like this!"

I was also a bit stunned—an inn's sign… its food being reserved, the man's display was truly grand. Still, even so, Jin Hong, do you really need to act like a bully of the good people?

But without my intervening, Second Sister had already tugged his sleeve; though she said nothing, it was enough to calm him. His expression, however, remained somewhat unfriendly.

The innkeeper kept bowing and apologizing repeatedly, "Truly sorry, gentlemen, please come another day to taste it!"

At that moment, Fu Junmo stepped forward a few paces, produced a stack—about ten silver notes—and handed them to him, saying calmly, "They can't possibly eat everything, can they?"

Our attire, combined with our generous bearing, instantly marked us as guests of illustrious lineage, not to be offended. Since the owner of Tianya Restaurant could run a thriving business here for so long, he naturally understood this.

So when he stepped back again, repeatedly apologizing yet not reaching for the silver notes, I was genuinely taken aback. I couldn't help but wonder what sort of person occupied the third floor.

Seeing a flash of cold light in Fu Junmo's eyes, I hurried forward, took the silver notes from his hand, and said with a smile, "In that case, we'll come another time!"

Although the innkeeper kept nodding and bowing, his gaze was neither servile nor arrogant, suggesting he wasn't an ordinary figure. Yet my words truly eased him; he repeatedly apologized, smiling apologetically, saying he'd welcome us next time.

I gave Fu Junmo, whose expression was slightly cold, a gentle tug and, smiling, prepared to leave.

Suddenly, at the stairwell, a well‑dressed yet somewhat frail boy sauntered down, saying to the innkeeper as he walked, "Owner, prepare the carriage and horses." His arrogant tone was natural, as if such a command from above was taken for granted.

The innkeeper was startled, quickly bowed respectfully and asked, "Young master, are you about to leave?" That respect was equally natural, incomparable to the earlier false politeness.

"Hmm. Hurry up!" the boy replied lightly, then sauntered back upstairs.

"... Miss... Miss!"

I was startled, then recovered; Xin Luo was looking up at me with a pretty little face, so I asked, "Xin Luo, what's wrong?"

"Ying Ruo, ever since we left the inn you've seemed absent‑minded, what's up?" Jin Hong's concerned face flickered before me, yet I still couldn't focus, "Are you tired? Or upset because we didn't get the flower-steamed brew?"

"No... I..." I frowned slightly, "I just feel that person... looks familiar..."

"That boy?"

I didn't know who was asking me, I just walked mechanically, nodded mechanically. Then whatever they were saying, I didn't catch a single word.

That boy really looked familiar; I'm sure I've seen him, even his voice... very familiar...

Tears are a bit salty, a bit sweet.

Your chest kisses my side of the face.

Looking back at the snow we stepped on.

Slowly melting into a prairie.

And I am like you.

Not a single second have I ever regretted.

The blood in my body surged for some unknown reason, my mind went blank; who was that boy? A buzzing sound rang in my ears. I know... it's important... who this person is, it's crucial to me...

Someone was speaking to me, someone held my hand, yet I felt nothing; my steps slowed, my mind cleared, and suddenly a sentence surfaced.

"Are you the ugly freak that Sister Zixuan mentioned?"

My steps halted abruptly, my whole body trembling uncontrollably.

A slight, skinny figure looked at me with contempt and said, "Are you the ugly freak that Sister Zixuan mentioned?"

Love is so lingering, so sticky.

Fate dictates who must part.

The coastline makes one linger even more.

Always more beautifully winding.

We are too stubborn.

Even the heavens cannot bear to oppose any longer.

Blood seemed to drain from my chest, then surged back in a rush.

My fingers clenched tightly in my palm, sinking into flesh. In this noisy street, my ears felt blocked; apart from the "thump‑thump" of my heartbeat, I heard no sound.

Tears welled up from my heart, moistening the corners of my eyes.

That person... is Qi Ran.

The one who booked the third floor, who booked all the flower-steamed brew, was indeed Qi Ran!

A loving gaze, a devotion lasting ten thousand years.

Through countless reincarnations, love remains unextinguished.

Lay the years out as a red carpet.

Witness our limits.

In this life, I may have many regrets; when I do them, I fear how I'll face the future. Emotion and reason are always opposed, checking and balancing my actions.

But at this moment, my mind has neither reason nor feeling, only that peerless grace, those profound blue eyes……

The wind kept blowing in my ears, my heart almost jumping out of my chest. I ran desperately, exhausting my inner strength, exhausting my life, knowing only to keep running through the bustling crowd.

Because I know that if I don't turn back, if I don't run, I will surely die.

——"Idiot, why are you crying? I'm fine…… cough…… really, I'm fine……"

——"When I wake up and can't see you. When I, see Bu Sha holding you, covered in blood, I'm really scared……"

——"Silly girl, I'm the same as you, I just don't want to watch you die!"

——"Good! I can comb your hair for a lifetime."

——"But if anyone dares to hurt those two…… I will repay them a thousandfold!"

……

Tears, as if they would drain all the water from my body, keep falling.

Such a person, such affection, such…… longing, how can I not turn back?

——"In this life, I will never forget that a boy once promised a lifetime oath, accompanying me through the season of falling blossoms."

""Bang——" I shoved away those pulling me and flung open the door to the third-floor private room."

Aching, a phrase cherished for ten thousand years.

An oath should stretch farther than forever.

If not for the vicissitudes of life.

How could true love surface?

On the table, small bowls were filled to the brim. I walked up slowly.

Inside the bowls were all flower-steamed fermented rice; each bowl a different flavor, each only half left……

I lifted one bowl to my lips; a faint osmanthus fragrance mixed with the bitterness of tears, as if that person's taste still lingered between my teeth. Memory surged like a tide, turning in my chest, sweet yet sorrowful……

""Bing Yi, what do you like to eat? You order.""

""Actually, I don't care.""

Qi Ran frowned slightly at me, ignoring the astonished looks of those around: ""Don't you have anything you most want to eat?""

I froze, suddenly remembering that every month we used to agree to go home for a few days, where Father would personally cook. His favorite to make was fermented rice balls, said to have been Mother's favorite before she passed.

A wave of sorrow and longing rose in my heart; I might…… never eat such fermented rice balls again in this lifetime.

""Your favorite?" I laughed. ""Fermented rice balls. Each flavor gets its own bowl, filling the round table so I can pick freely. Clearly my brother loves pear flavor, I love osmanthus, yet I always snatch his. But he still yields to me…… Father…… too……"

Later, Qi Ran finally understood that the fermented rice balls I spoke of were the flower-steamed fermented rice.

The next morning I woke up, my nostrils filled with rich fragrance. I stared blankly at the table full of fermented rice balls, each bowl a different flavor, filling the whole table.

Qi Ran pushed the door open, placing the last bowl of fermented rice balls on the table; his peerless visage was fresh and unworldly, yet his smile carried indulgent, slightly childlike eager praise as he looked at me and said: ""I just learned this from my master last night; I don't know if it's right or tasty—try it.""

Tears burst forth.

I'm not someone easily moved, but at this moment, aside from tearful emotion, I could do nothing.

That's Qi Ran! Noble as a heavenly deity, served since childhood! Yet for me he stayed up all night, learning from others how to cook this table of fermented rice balls……

What kind of fortune could let me meet him? Having met him, to be held in his palm……

I gazed at the table full of flower-steamed fermented rice, at the empty carved wooden chair, tears slipping down softly.

Qi Ran, we still missed each other, right?

Sorry! It's me saying I have no right to love anyone. It's me…… fleeing from your life.

I let my tears flow, yet I don't want to wipe them away. Qi Ran, we might truly never see each other again!

But I…… really long to see you again, even just once!

Suddenly, someone grabbed me, holding me tight, almost crushing me, an icy yet angry voice sounded in my ear: ""Whose tears are you shedding? Ruo Er, you are my woman, you are not allowed to…… ah——!"

""You——!" he shouted, releasing his grip, supporting his bloody arm, face shocked and furious.

I held a dagger thin as a cicada's wing, tears still on my face, I coldly stared at him and coldly said: ""Now is not the time for you to provoke me or come near me!""

I am not Lan Yingruo; I am…… Shui Bingyi!

Having said that, I silently turned and left the room permeated with Qi Ran's aura, for I truly could not stay any longer.

I walked indifferently down the street; a purple carriage brushed past me, kicking up my disheveled hair as it vanished in a swirl of dust……

Inside the carriage.

A youth wore a silver-gray mask, holding a food box in his hands. His face was unseen, but his eyes were pale blue like water, yet also tranquil like water.

The carriage jolted; Qian Xuan, unsteady in his seat, lurched forward and crashed into the youth. His body slumped sideways, his elbow striking the carriage wall, yet the food box in his hand remained perfectly still.

Qian Xuan hurriedly called out: ""Sorry, Young Master! Xiao Xuan didn't mean to. Let me…… I'll take it for you!"

The youth neither blamed nor replied, his eyes tranquil like water, merely gazing indifferently out the window, clutching the food box tightly.

""Young Master……"

Qian Xuan's eyes welled up; the Young Master has changed greatly since his return. He doesn't like to speak, won't smile, no longer gently strokes his head. He also never takes off that crescent-shaped mask, revealing his peerless visage.

""Bu?" a voice as heavenly as it was clear and cold rang out.

""Reporting to the Young Master," Chen Jue—the third person in the carriage—immediately replied, ""These past days Bu Sha…… Mister has been sneaking out, his whereabouts unknown……

Saying this, his face showed difficulty; he paused and said: ""Young Master, should I send someone to follow……

The youth staring out the window finally turned his head, his eyes still tranquil, voice indifferent: ""If you have the guts, try it."" Though his tone held no inflection, it made the two in the carriage shudder.

Chen Jue hastily bowed his head: ""Subordinate…… subordinate dares not!"" After speaking he felt a chill run down his back—he had broken out in a cold sweat.

The youth lowered his gaze to the food box in his hands; at this moment his cold blue eyes finally reflected intense feeling—despair and sorrow.

He lifted his head again; his blue eyes were already dead empty. The youth continued to gaze indifferently out the window at the bustling crowd, a world apart from him.

When love brushed past, I also once wanted to cherish that flutter.

But I couldn't hold onto each other's hands, which went in different directions.

When you and I brushed past, we also once left behind a moving legend.

Could I still wait for me, stay for you?

I don't know how long I've walked; my feet feel nothing, my body feels nothing, because my heartache surpasses everything, overwhelming everything.

Until…… something darted into my arms.

I stared blankly at a pair of eyes as black as liuli, full of surprise gazing at me; the wet, soft tongue kept licking my icy cold hand back.

Is…… Xiao…… Yin…… Xiao Yin?

「Master…… master? 」

I lifted my head; a man whose whole face was covered by a mask, only a pair of bright and surprised eyes looking at me, shouting…… master.

「Wu…… Ye? 」 I slowly, syllable by syllable, called out his name.

He saw my face streaked with tears, and froze.

「Miss! 」

「Miss! 」

Xinhui and Xinluo anxiously ran toward me; they saw Wu Ye, and Wu Ye also saw them. But none of them asked about each other's identity; they just looked at me with very worried, very worried eyes.

Qiran, I promised you I would definitely live on. So I myself have continually strived to live, strived to be happy.

Even if I grow even sadder, I will not cry; even if I grow even more sorrowful, I will smile.

Because I know, without you by my side, I can only be strong, stronger still, to possibly live happily.

But……

I gazed at Xiao Yin, gazed at Wu Ye, gazed at Xinhui and Xinluo; each pair of eyes full of concern, I slowly squatted down.

But Qiran, I am really tired now. I can't smile anymore, nor can I pretend to be happy.

Can I, just a moment, just a moment, let me in front of these people who care about me, not have to be strong, let me cry freely?

I buried my face in the crook of my arm, burying it deep. The tears scorched the skin beneath the silk, but they were nothing compared to the myriad heartaches. The sorrowful cries echoed around me, by my ears, in this bustling street……

I really miss you all, Qiran, Bu Sha.

Sorry! Qiran…… why did I only today regret not having personally told you…… I love you!

On the bustling street, a girl squatted on the ground, weeping sorrowfully, as if endless grief, inexhaustible regret.

On the bustling street, three people, a fox, tightly surrounded a girl, as if to use their lives to protect her from harm.

On the bustling street, someone stood still, coldly gazing.

Just on the bustling street, people still come and go, even with this much sorrow and obsession……

(End of chapter)