Chapter 41

I laughed, took up the brush, signed my name on the three flourish‑written agreement papers, then picked up the white jade said to be called the Purple Phoenix, dipped it in ink, and stamped each paper.

Does this count as stamping the phoenix seal? I broke out in a little sweat.

Hy Lingfeng looked at the paper I handed him, smiled helplessly, his crystal‑clear fingers lightly touching his forehead, and said half‑smiling, "I must be mad to agree to your third condition."

Seeing me laugh even more happily, he shook his head and unconsciously revealed an indulgent smile; I couldn't help but stare.

After laughing, he took up the brush and signed his name, then produced a square piece of jade, pure white except for a red tip—presumably the imperial seal—and stamped it on the paper.

As for the witness, Wen Ce, he was clearly dumbfounded, holding the paper that had been passed over, unable to decide whether to put it down or keep it.

Good heavens! Who will tell him that such an imperial marriage exists in this world? A contract marriage? The emperor actually… actually agreed to such an outrageous condition!

And he, a grand minister of a great nation, ends up being the witness to this bewildering marriage?

His hand trembled violently as he picked up the brush…

"Three copies!" I laughed, carefully tucking my agreement paper into my bosom, and said proudly, "If one day either party violates the terms, the other can make this agreement public. However, Minister Wen, as the witness, you must be fair then!"

Having said that, I waved my hand and turned to leave.

"Yingruo." Hy Lingfeng's voice sounded again as I grasped the door handle; perhaps it was an illusion, but today his voice seemed less harsh and calculating, softer: "Peacefully wait for me to come and marry you."

My heart lurched, irritation welled up; without answering, I opened the door and hurried away.

Back at the Lan manor, in my room, I collapsed exhausted on the bed, too tired to speak another word. This day has been a mix of shock and deceit, writing and drawing—whether mental or physical strength, I can't take it anymore.

Xin Hui and Wu Ye gathered around.

"Miss, how did the negotiations go?" I muttered a few "uh‑ahs"; Xin Hui, thinking it had failed, hurried to comfort me: "Miss, I said the emperor would never accept such a ridiculous condition. Don't worry—I just got the antidote sent by 'Ying'er'; let's just run away now."

I lifted my head and, weak‑voiced, handed her the paper from my bosom.

Xin Hui took it, and she and Wu Ye leaned in to look. After a moment…

"Good heavens, Miss——" Xin Hui exclaimed, "How… how did you manage this?"

I barely sat up, gave a hehe laugh, and said, "Move them with emotion, enlighten them with reason, finally lure them with profit." Actually the first two lines are nonsense; it's that last profit that got Hy Lingfeng to agree.

Wu Ye snatched the paper, examined it carefully for a while, then said, "The emperor actually agreed?"

I nodded and couldn't help complaining, "You have no idea how much talk and effort I expended to get this paper."

Wu Ye looked at me, shook his head in disbelief, and handed the paper back: "Master, you should be glad you returned unharmed."

That makes sense. I couldn't help shivering, set the paper down, then simply flopped back to continue my "rest and recuperation."

A knock sounded, accompanied by Jin Hong's slightly tired voice: "Yingruo……" I heard two sets of footsteps; there should also be Second Brother.

I hurriedly told Xin Hui to open the door and let them in.

They both still looked exhausted, but a faint gleam had appeared in their eyes. I smiled; perhaps Hy Lingfeng's subsidies had given them a bit of hope.

However, their gazes felt odd; they didn't dare settle on me, darting about furtively.

Once they sat down, I couldn't help but ask strangely, "Jin Hong, Second Brother, what happened?"

Jin Hong glanced at me and said, "I heard the minister of Qi State brought a massive bridal gift to propose to Father Lan, saying he wants you to marry into Qi as his consort."

I forced a smile and nodded. Indeed, good news stays home while bad news travels far.

Second Brother let out a long sigh, his tone bleak and resigned: "It seems the only thing that can save our Ting State now is Qi."

I remained silent, thinking to myself: That's because you don't yet know the wolfish ambitions of the Qi king.

"The minister just returned with his guards and brought up the old matter again with Father," Second Brother said after gazing at me for a while, "He also said that once the wedding date is set, the Qi king will send troops to help. Father… has already agreed."

Wen Ce sure acts fast! I thought to myself, but Old Fox Lan Junqing probably still doesn't know I've already agreed—how dare he presume to consent on his own, humph!

"Fourth Sister…" Second Brother interrupted my reverie, looking at me as if he wanted to speak but hesitated.

I was stunned, about to inquire, when Jin Hong leapt up and shouted, "Jianyun, stop hemming and hawing—I'll say it myself!"

"Yingruo, we've come hoping you can save this nation. Personal happiness is trivial; without a country, where is the home…"

I didn't hear a word of what Jin Hong said afterward; only a buzzing filled my ears and mind. I slowly rose, clenched the fists hanging at my sides, and asked word by word: "You came to persuade me to marry into Qi, didn't you?"

Second Brother—no, Lan Jianyun—also rose, his eyes full of guilt, almost whispering: "Fourth Sister, Second Brother knows it's asking a weak woman like you to save our country; I… we men are all useless, but…"

I don't know if my voice trembled, but I clearly felt my heart shaking painfully; a surge of qi rose from my limbs and pores to my chest, almost making me suffocate.

Holding onto the last sliver of hope, I looked at them and asked softly: "You mean, if we set aside your male pride, I should willingly marry into Qi to exchange for our nation's survival?"

"This has nothing to do with men or women!" Jin Hong exclaimed excitedly. "We are all citizens of this state; as long as we can protect the country, any sacrifice is worthwhile. Yingruo, you usually understand these principles, don't you?"

"Hah… I usually understand?" My laugh sounded worse than a sob. "What should I understand?"

"Liu Jin Hong, you bastard——" I grabbed the weeping Xin Hui and shoved her toward Wu Ye, whose whole body was bristling with killing intent; Xin Hui still cried, "Do you even know what Miss has done for you…"

"Wu Ye, take Xin Luo and Xin Hui out!" I said, my face ashen, coldly.

Wu Ye's fists were clenched tight, as if he were about to rush out and kill someone. I shouted again, sternly: "Wu Ye!"

He squeezed out three words from between his teeth: "Yes, Master!" He dragged the weeping Xin Hui and the dazed Xin Luo out of the room.

In the room, not even a pin drop could be heard.

I suddenly grew calm, not knowing whether I was numb from pain or simply didn't want to hurt anymore. I lifted my head and gave them a bland glance: "Liu Jin Hong, I only ask you one thing: if it were Second Sister who was to marry today, what would you do?"

Jin Hong's face turned pale; he bit his lips, his expression sorrowful yet resolute: "True great heroism lies in sacrificing everything to defend the nation and its people. If my own happiness could buy peace for this country, I believe it would be worth it."

"Yingyue, though merely a woman of this realm, I know her pure nature well. For the country, let alone marrying someone she dislikes, even if she had to give her life, she would hesitate not at all."

"And I will remain unmarried all my life, revering and loving her more than myself."

Jin Hong spoke with fervor, with decisiveness, speaking… with righteous confidence, noble and unyielding.

I had nothing to refute, nor did I want to, for my heart grew cold bit by bit, until… it chilled to the bone.

I could no longer bear my own weight, slumped into the chair, and without lifting my gaze to them, waved my hand: "I… I agree. You may go and report back."

Their fervent zeal, their loyal patriotism, struck me like a fist hitting cotton—utterly ineffectual.

"Get out." I repeated, not turning my head.

"Fourth Sister!"

"Yingruo!"

I bit my lower lip tightly and softly said, "Get out!"

I got up, closed the window and door, faced the worried Xin Hui and Wuye, shook my head, and softly said, "Sorry, I want to be alone and calm for a while."

I climbed onto the bed, drew my knees up and curled myself at the head of the bed. My body trembled nonstop, whether from cold or something else.

I once heard that people only revert to the posture they had before leaving the womb when they are extremely grief‑stricken and lack a sense of security.

I don't know if that's true, but right now I just want to hold myself like this, silently licking my wounds in the slowly descending night, in the boundless stillness of the night.

I don't regret what I've done; I just finally realize that some people, some things, really aren't as simple as I thought.

Kindness can be a synonym for weakness, and justice can also become a sword that pierces a person's chest.

Boundless darkness enveloped me, and I suddenly recalled those bleak childhood memories—the corpse as beautiful and pure as a white lotus, my older brother tightly embracing me and saying, "Bing'er, don't be afraid; I will become the finest assassin and forever protect you."

Memories flashed like a horse galloping through flowers, swirling in my mind: Qiran's warm smile, Bu Sha's silent guard, Xiaoyin, Wuye, Xin Hui, Xin Luo, Wei Lingfeng, Fu Junmo, Jin Hong, and my second older brother…

Every figure churned violently in my mind. Turns out I'm utterly foolish.

Can sunlight be easily chased with such a deliberate heart?

Did I truly believe naively that if I wanted something and then acted on it, I would be happy?

I clutched my knees tightly, not knowing whether my body or my heart was so cold I felt suffocated. I'm not sad—what do I have to be sad about? Anyway, I was merely a passerby to them, and they to me.

It's just that after finally wanting to embrace the crowd, I ended up wounded and bloody—nothing more.

It's just another reminder that the world's hustle and warmth will never belong to me—nothing more.

It's just realizing clearly that, having lost Qiran and Bu Sha's protection, I am still utterly useless—nothing more.

What else... is there to be sad about?

The door was gently pushed open, someone approached my bedside. I didn't lift my head; my gaze lingered on the hem of their gray‑black clothes, but my awareness did not stay.

The room remained as quiet as when I was alone.

His hand slowly reached out in the darkness, stroking my hair; my posture remained unchanged.

"Wuye." The hand stroking my hair paused slightly, and I spoke calmly, "Do you know? In a time and space far from ours lies another world, different from Earth, an ideal perfect world."

"It is a world where consciousness reigns supreme; they have a maiden called the 'Pillar'. As long as she prays without cease each day, the world will know no slaughter or war, forever peaceful and beautiful. Yet that maiden fell in love with the guardian priest who protected her. That love grew deeper, eventually outweighing the weight of her nation in her heart. Because of this selfish love, the world is no longer peaceful and happy; monsters run rampant, homelands are destroyed, people are displaced. Everyone blames the maiden, clearly if she just prayed and guarded properly, countless people could live happily and beautifully. The maiden also feels guilty for her selfishness, so she sealed herself away and then… summoned someone from another world to kill her. For she hopes that by her death she can exchange for a new Pillar's appearance, continuing to guard this world."

Wuye reached out and pulled me into his embrace; his warm body heat transmitted through his clothes, and I returned the hold, burying my face deep in his chest: "That world is indeed more beautiful than Earth—only one person's loneliness can exchange for everyone's happiness. But Wuye, why doesn't anyone think about that?" I slowly withdrew my hand, curling it before his chest, gripping then releasing, "People's happiness can be guarded by the maiden, but whose heart guards the maiden's own heart?"

Tears slowly welled up; I was unwilling, truly unwilling.

"If I were truly Lan Yingruo, should I not be obligated to sacrifice my happiness for the country? And in the face of national interests, is a maiden's heart truly insignificant?"

Why is it that the two people I sincerely call friends are the ones saying such things?

I don't dare hope for anyone to guard my heart; I only wish no one would hurt it—just that, is that too much to ask?

"Wuye, I truly regard them as friends and sincerely wish them happiness." (sob)

I clutched his chest, already soaked with my tears; sorrowful sobs burst from my throat: "What if I'm not acknowledged? What if my efforts go unrewarded? I'm not sad... really, I swear, from now on I will never be sad about this again... never!"

Suddenly, a numbness struck my neck; my mind went blank, my exhausted body went limp in his arms, and I lost consciousness.

In the quiet room, a man in plain gray clothes, ordinary in appearance, lifted the sleeping girl in his arms horizontally and gently laid her on the bed.

Under the moonlight, his fingers were like white porcelain, like beautiful jade, crystalline as if holding a glow.

His slender fingers brushed over the girl's tear‑streaked face, then slowly withdrew. In the darkness, those eyes, incongruous with his plain face, flashed with a sharp light; afterward the light gradually softened and deepened, complex and unfathomable.

He leaned down and whispered two sentences softly into her ear.

Thereafter, a faint sigh echoed in the room; the man furrowed his brows and slipped out silently.

"Miss!" Xin Hui woke from her dream, saw me sitting properly at the table eating flower‑stuffed dumplings, a bit dazed. She glanced at the already awake Wuye beside her; Wuye also gave an inexplicable shake of his head.

"Miss." Xin Luo snuggled up to me; I fed him a spoonful of flower‑stuffed dumplings, which he swallowed happily before saying, "Sister said you were very upset yesterday, Miss; are you happy today?"

I stroked his head and smiled, "Mm, I'm no longer upset."

Upon hearing that, Xin Luo's usually cold face broke into a smile as he clung to me and ate a few more bites of the dumplings.

"Miss..." Xin Hui looked at me with eyes full of worry, wanting to speak but stopping; needless to say, Wuye felt the same.

I broke into a bright smile and reassured, "Don't worry, I'm fine."

Setting down my spoon, I gave Wuye a deep grateful glance, then turned my head to the window‑outside garden steaming with summer heat, though my thoughts drifted far away, and I murmured, "In this world, who isn't learning strength while stumbling?"

(End of chapter)