Chapter 1: Merlin

"Sorry, we aren't hiring..."

"Excuse me, we don't need shop assistants..."

"Ten O's in O. W. L. s, seven O's in N. E. W. T. s... These grades look fake..."

"You're already employed at the Ministry of Magic? And you're still applying for a shop assistant job? Why?"

"This is Essence of Dittany? This refining method would be considered unprofessional by customers. Sorry, you can go."

"Your father is Sanders? That Dark Wizard? Get out of my shop!"

"No one calculates better than a goblin. Gringotts doesn't need a smart-aleck wizard!"

"The main duty of this position is cleaning up animal feces. The daily wage is two Knuts..."

"Bartender? What kind of thing is that? Mixing boogers into the beer?"

"Motherfucker!"

Walking out of the Leaky Cauldron and standing on Charing Cross Road, Murphy couldn't help but curse.

Shitty Diagon Alley.

Shitty wizards!

They are all a bunch of arrogant, stubborn, unreasonable idiots!

Hah!

Letting out a long breath, Murphy calmed his emotions a little.

Finding a job in the Wizarding World is just too damn hard!

Because of the existence of magic, Diagon Alley, as the most high-end commercial street in all of England and a place where flagship stores of major chain brands are clustered, doesn't even have a decent position.

After all, magic is so convenient that it allows a shopkeeper to complete the vast majority of the work alone, with no need to hire anyone at all.

Only places like potion shops that require professional skills might recruit shop assistants.

But they looked down on Murphy's technique.

"Clearly, the Muggle distillation method is much more efficient than a cauldron! And the effect of my Essence of Dittany is more than three times that of the traditional refining method!"

Damn it!

Stubborn, brainless idiots!

While cursing that blind shopkeeper violently in his mind, Murphy quickened his pace.

The previous job hunt had wasted too much time, and he was almost late for work.

Although he was extremely tired of that job, at least it still paid a salary.

Moreover, he really didn't want to continue listening to that fat woman's sarcasm and mockery.

Damn the Floo Network Authority! If it weren't for them delaying...

"Screech—" A harsh braking sound interrupted the muttering in Murphy's mind, followed by a "Bang."

Murphy turned his head subconsciously and saw a red Ferrari F40 swerving its body to a difficult stop. In front of the hood, a small figure rolled on the ground many times and stopped in front of Murphy.

"Ah!! Lisa!" A woman screamed and threw herself toward the figure on the ground.

A man with a mohawk and a deathly pale face also stepped out of the Ferrari.

"It was her, she was the one who rushed out..."

A car accident.

A Muggle car accident.

Murphy was also a bit stunned, taking a look at the injured little girl.

One of her legs was bent at a strange angle, and there were even broken bone fragments exposed on the outside of her thigh, with blood bubbling out.

"The artery is ruptured! Quickly stop the bleeding for her!" A woman shouted.

She seemed to be medical personnel and reacted quickly, pulling over a cloth towel to bandage the wound while instructing the girl's mother to press down on the blood vessel.

"I'm a nurse, quick, call an ambulance! You, come and help! Press this down first..."

The nurse directly ordered Murphy, who was standing to the side. The latter was stunned for a moment but didn't object.

Taking the towel handed over by someone nearby, he pressed it onto the wound as instructed. However, the blood still bubbled out, soaking the towel in no time.

"It's no use! There are too many bleeding points, it can't be stopped like this!"

The female nurse said anxiously, but she didn't have a better way, so she could only let Murphy press harder.

"Is it enough just to stop the bleeding?" Murphy asked suddenly.

"Yes, with this amount of blood loss, if it's not stopped, she might go into shock before the ambulance arrives. Do you have any way?"

Murphy didn't say anything more, threw away the blood-soaked towel, took out a bottle of Essence of Dittany he had made while interviewing for the potion shop assistant job, and poured it directly onto the wound.

The raw materials for this essence were bought by him, and naturally, he brought the finished product back.

A wisp of white smoke rose, and the terrifying wound actually healed rapidly, visible to the naked eye.

"What kind of medicine is this?" The nurse was stunned.

Murphy didn't answer, only saying: "This medicine can only make her wound heal, but it might cause tissue misalignment..."

As he spoke, Murphy handed the remaining Essence of Dittany to the nurse. "Forget it, you take the rest of the medicine. If taken directly, it's also useful for internal injuries. If there is internal bleeding and the situation is urgent, you can also try it. Also, after the surgery, drip some for her; it can avoid scarring during healing."

After finishing, Murphy wanted to leave directly.

Compared to a life, a bottle of Essence of Dittany was nothing, but he couldn't explain the problem with this medicine, so it was better to slip away early.

"Wait."

The mohawked Ferrari owner stopped Murphy.

"You, that kind of medicine just now, I've never seen medicine with that kind of effect..."

"Get lost." Murphy had no time to deal with a Muggle rich kid.

"Wait, wait, I'm a director at Jelida Pharmaceuticals, my dad is the boss. If your medicine..."

The mohawked man looked very excited, even grabbing Murphy's clothes.

"I said get lost!"

The mohawked man was startled by Murphy's gaze, hurriedly retracted his hand, and made a gesture of surrender.

After Murphy walked far away, he called out from behind:

"If you want to sell your formula, contact me! We will give you a lot of money..."

"Heh, Muggles." Murphy sneered, not looking back.

Sell a potion formula to Muggles?

Not to mention the problems with raw materials and refining, does he think the International Statute of Wizarding Secrecy is just for show?

Walking for another block, Murphy found the red telephone booth.

After dialing 62442, a female voice sounded in the booth: "Name, purpose?"

"Murphy Darkholm. Work."

"Oh, poor young man, has Belinda not finished handling your employee permit yet?"

"Merlin's asshole, no!"

"Alright, please enter."

The floor sank, turning into an elevator, which sent Murphy directly to the Ministry of Magic lobby.

As soon as he stepped out of the elevator, Murphy saw a bald dwarf walking out of the fireplace opposite, busily tidying his robes while trying hard to stand on tiptoe to make himself look taller.

"Hey, dwarf... cough, Dolph!" Murphy went up and patted the dwarf's shoulder.

"It's Director Dolph! Kid!"

"Has my fireplace Floo Network application been approved?" Murphy asked.

"It's going through the process, what's the rush."

"I have to walk three blocks every day to get to work, do you think I'm in a rush?"

"You can Apparate to work, I remember you have a license."

"My employee permit isn't finished yet, Apparating directly..."

"Illegal. Yes, I participated in drafting that law, aiming to strengthen the Ministry of Magic..."

"So, I only have the Floo Network," Murphy interrupted the other's chatter, "Where exactly is the application stuck? It's been a month!"

"Your fireplace is very troublesome, you know, because of your parents. This fireplace was previously struck off the register, and to restore the registration, it requires a lot of procedures..."

"How much longer will it take?"

"Maybe a month, maybe two months. If there are other things to get busy with, maybe three or four months..."

"Fuck!" Murphy couldn't help but swear.

"What?"

Murphy used Chinese, so Dolph didn't understand.

"Your mother's leg! I'll fuck your ancestors! You dwarf! Idiot! A pig that only eats and doesn't work!"

Still Chinese.

"You seem to be cursing me?"

Murphy turned and left, not wanting to stay by this dwarf's side for even a second.

Motherfucker!

Ever since he graduated from Hogwarts and joined the Ministry of Magic, Murphy's temper had gotten worse day by day, and he was like a grumpy porcupine. Just now, he almost couldn't control his anger, wishing he could slap that ugly face suspected of having goblin ancestry.

"Hah, calm down, calm down..."

Wizards are all idiots, wizards are all idiots...

Forgive them.

With their sardine-like brains, just staying alive is already not easy.

Be magnanimous, be magnanimous.

After some psychological construction, Murphy's mood recovered a little.

Turning his head, he saw someone else.

"Director Scrimgeour!"

Suddenly discovered that this chapter title had a few characters censored, I'll fill them in, otherwise it's a bit weird.

(End of chapter)