Chapter 105: The Beginning of a Dream

-Let us talk about dreams.

This has no meaning whatsoever.

This is merely an imitation of a writer who continues to write dreams in despair.

First of all, you wouldn't look for meaning in a dream, would you?

This has no meaning. I wanted to see it, so this is a dream.

It has only just begun, let us talk about the nostalgic and faintly passing dreams.

Although I miss my short black hair, I cannot think of why it would be nostalgic.

Kurapika said to Sora, who had fallen to the ground, feeling no incongruity regarding the discordant sensation of memories and thoughts where the past and future intersect.

"Sora. Are your eyes the same as the Scarlet Eyes?"

"? Beauty of the sun? What is that?"

Mutual introductions... though only names were exchanged, other than that, this was the first decent conversation.

Thinking about it now, it is a bit tricky to say whether it went well, but the conversation ultimately arrived at an undistorted and carefree answer.

In this situation, it is unusual for Sora to be without fault.

Asking someone who fell after helping you, "Are you okay?" I had no choice.

However, for Kurapika, who was in the midst of distrusting humanity at the time, treating him as the only reason to believe was truly annoying.

The more he thought about it, the more arrogant he felt, wanting to choke his own neck and questioning what kind of person he was at the time, but Kurapika, whose sympathy for others had already been worn away, was completely unaware of his own rudeness as he spoke, continuing to talk to the lying Sora with a look of disappointment.

... Although disappointed, I still clung to her, hoping to receive her affirmation.

My arrogance at the time was nothing more than a bluff to cover up my own loneliness.

I don't want to believe it, but I want to believe it.

Kurapika asked more questions because he wanted someone he could trust, rely on, and depend on.

"Scarlet Eyes, as the name implies, are scarlet eyes.

Do you know the Kurta Tribe? In the case of the Kurta, they are scarlet, but they change color just like your eyes. Didn't you run away and hide because you have that constitution?"

I knew from the beginning that I was not a member of the Kurta Tribe.

However, because his eyes so strongly reminded him of his kin, Kurapika thought he was the only person in the world whose "eye color changed," so Kurapika knew the other party was a tribesman similar to himself, and he was convinced that the reason he was weak enough to collapse in the corner of the slum was the same as his own.

In this regard, Sora was not bad, but Kurapika was worse. Kurapika's guess was more natural because, regardless of his ignorance or distrust of people, he could not imagine the situation on Sora's side.

Kurapika naturally understood from the answer he heard from Sora, who was lying face up with a slightly puzzled expression, that his guess was completely wrong.

"... Eh?... My eyes changed color?... Why?"

"... Hmm?"

Unexpectedly, he knew nothing about the change in color, and even his disappointment was blown away by Kurapika.

Looking up at that voice and face, Sora's expression changed.

She was weak because she had not yet recovered enough to stand up, but she still smiled and reached out to touch Kurapika's cheek.

Better than Kurapika, she stroked his cheek with her extremely dry and dirty fingertips, and this time Kurapika was confused by his sudden smile and warm hand.

"Sorry, I am not the same as you."

Sora knew almost nothing about Kurapika's situation.

However, I can only guess his extreme obsession with his own "eyes," and why he was so obsessed.

Without his own meaning and value, he only knew that he had found meaning, found value, and the reason Sora wanted to let him live in those eyes where he only hoped "I don't want to die."

This is the reason for Sora's apology.

Seeing his face, the color being different from what he wanted, and being different from him, this was an acquired nature... the cause of loneliness, even the most suspicious opponent could be held in his arms. Able to sympathize.

Faced with that apology, this time Kurapika was dumbfounded.

When my thoughts were reset by Sora's unexpected apology, my expectations of "perhaps she is the same," the disappointment of disappointment, and the frustration caused by disappointment were also reset.

Kurapika, who regained his composure after the restart, realized how unreasonable his words and thoughts were toward the person who had fallen while helping him, and as Sora touched his cheek, he shook his face away and retorted angrily and unreasonably.

"Ah, don't apologize! Why apologize!?"

No matter how you look at it, Kurapika was completely offended.

"No, I'm sorry. I said 'okay,' but I didn't even say a witty remark, let alone help you."

In response, Kurapika rolled his eyes again and turned to face Sora.

Awkwardly, he looked away with meaningless stubbornness and did not see it.

Kurapika did not know that when he shook off Sora's hand, her eyebrows twisted in pain.

When she turned around, she was a little embarrassed, but she smiled as if she had forgiven everything.

Kurapika was stunned again by that overly kind smile, but he did not understand why she could smile at him like that, nor did he understand how she could show such a smile, and his doubts flowed out naturally.

"... Are you serious?"

Faced with Kurapika's question, Sora lay down and tilted her head curiously.

This alone was enough to answer the question.

Seriously, you must be willing to accept Kurapika's request for "help," as he cried and hugged you. To the point that she did not expect to be asked about this again, the more she understood that this was a matter of course for her, the more she could not explain it.

Thus, Kurapika asked again.

"... Why is it like this?"

Proving that Kurapika's explanation was correct, Sora tilted her head again and asked, "What?"

She knew nothing.

Why would a child who just met, not the person who helped me, but the person I helped, even so, continue to be unreasonable and illogical and want to "help"? Sora did not understand that he tried to respond to this request so naturally that he did not want to be asked, or that he was looking for a reason.

This is the reason I asked.

"... Why did you help me?"

"You and I... we just met... if your reason for being weak in a place like this is completely different from mine, then you have no reason to help me, right?"

"Trying to help me instead of pitying or sympathizing... what exactly is the reason for responding to my 'help me'?"

Although Kurapika was crying while holding him, she still did not believe Sora's words: "It's okay."

I don't want to believe. I am afraid to believe.

That day happened in a small town, where he and his best friend dreamed of the "outside world" and visited as a test.

The kind person who protected us from being pestered by thugs apologized for not being able to help us, and picked up the money saved by the Flame Soldier when I fought back against a thug who was almost twice my age and build.

Thinking about it calmly, it wasn't that those people were afraid of the change in eye color, but that Kurapika possessed a power that even adults could not withstand, letting this power run wild with emotions. I know I was afraid of my own violent behavior, and I understand that fear is natural.

But even so... the thought of "Why?" still burned in Kurapika's heart.

The old woman who threw a Stone at her called her a "Red Eyes monster."

When he was picking up the Flame Soldier's gold, he seemed to hate thugs, but when he discovered Kurapika was a "Red Eyes monster," he was incomparable to the thugs; I looked at him with curious eyes.

And the woman who seemed to be her granddaughter was holding the old woman to stop her, crying.

"This will get us killed," he said, not for Kurapika, but for themselves, for the old woman.

The bitter memory of being treated as a "monster" by those who watched me gently, by those I thought were protecting me, by those I loved as I loved my kin. A defense you cannot believe or do not want to believe.

By not believing, I tried to convince myself that my expectations would not be betrayed, and even if I were seen as a monster, I would not be hurt.

However, this person named Sora easily crossed that line of defense and touched the softest part of Kurapika's heart.

"............ Thank you, perhaps?"

".............. Respect?"

At the moment I was called a monster, I couldn't understand why anyone would say that to me, or why people would look at me that way, but I couldn't understand Sora's answer even more than that.

Unable to understand, unable to accept, unable to explain, but unlike the situation at that time where I had to accept it, Sora answered the reason for this incomprehensible answer.

With the same eyes as when I was a child, until seeing her scarlet eyes... deeper than the affectionate eyes of the girls back then, Sora looked straight at Kurapika and spoke.

"Hmm... I have always been helped by the people around me, so you are the first to help others. When you let me help you, I thought I could be useful, I could live on.

Therefore, thank you."

No matter how you look at it, Kurapika should be the one to thank, but even so, Sora smiled and said: "Thank you for letting me help you, thank you for relying on me."

The reason for that smile is even more incomprehensible. This is something I cannot accept. This is completely unacceptable.

But Kurapika...

"... Aren't you called a freak?"

"Hmm? You think I haven't been told that?"

I don't understand. I can't believe it. Unacceptable.

But even so, this is also the reason I am willing to believe.

I remember the ideals I had no choice but to let rot while protecting them, not through reasoning, but by setting up a line of defense; I wanted to be like this, I wanted to be like this.

I remember believing there was a world, not just in stories but in reality, where if I lived properly, there would always be equally good people to help me.

That is why I am willing to believe.

I don't know what happened, I can't imagine it, but I know he has the same eyes as me, is just as weak as me, but he grabbed what I thought I had already given up on and threw it away... I believed.

Not because he was like his brethren, nor because he was like himself. On the contrary, I think he is a person completely unlike me.

I thought you were much stronger than me.

He believes in the kindness of people, no matter how much he is hurt, he thinks she is "strong" and wants that kind of power.

——It was at this moment that I wanted to know more about the person named Sora Tokiori.

I was attracted by her beautiful smile, as if someone had begged to save her.

... It must have been at this moment that I regretted it, the warmth touching my cheek had already left me, even though I had shaken it off myself.

The "dream" that should have slowly rotted and died was revived.

Kurapika's self-enclosed "shell" cracked.

"... Not good, you should still eat a little, you won't recover forever."

"Ah... sorry, I can't. I'm not backing down, but I am currently severely unable to eat solid food. I will vomit and consume extra physical strength, so if you don't mind, I just want some water."

"... I understand... it's fine not to be shy."

A full day has passed since meeting Sora, but to be honest, Sora and Kurapika have not opened their hearts to each other.

We cannot open our hearts to each other, we have barely exchanged conversations that look like conversations.

The reason we barely talk is that Sora is not yet in a state where he can say he has recovered.

You talk to him, he talks to no avail, but no matter how you look at him, his complexion is not good, so Kurapika realizes that his long-windedness is to hide his illness, and the reason he hides it is that he is worried about himself. I dare not say anything special, because I am there, so I just leave it alone.

However, rather than considering Sora, it is more convenient for Kurapika.

Kurapika does not think of Sora as a selfish substitute for "someone similar to my kin," but because he likes Sora as an individual and wants to believe in him; on the contrary, he wants to know what he should talk to him about, what kind of person he should ask. I don't know how to handle it.

I was born and raised in a narrow, close-knit, special community, my kin were all relatives, and I lost this community in the worst way. I realized I wanted to die because of my extremely unreasonable words and actions. I have done that to Sora.

Especially towards "people I want to trust or want to trust," I really don't know what to say or how to say it, which is different from "relatives who don't need to hide anything" or "other people who only need to get along on the surface." Kurapika was dumbfounded.

I want to be considerate, as if the other party treats me as if they care about me, but the words that come out are not cute at all.

I at least want to restore her exhausted physical strength, but Kurapika, in such a corner of the slums, I cannot say that I have completely opened my heart to Sora, there is no reason to prepare a nutritious meal that even Sora can eat, warm bedding, etc. It is best to be able to secure drinking water.

When I felt like my eyes were going to be dug out, someone helped me, I feel like I owe the person who helped me, I don't know if I can pay it back in a lifetime. Kurapika feels unreasonable and feels very frustrated.

"What's wrong, Kurapika?"

Sensing Kurapika's frustration, Sora turned over and asked Kurapika.

Despite the dark circles on her rare beauty, whether male or female, she still said with a smile.

"Are you sleepy?"

As Sora spoke, he tried to hand Kurapika the rough cloth he had been wrapped in, which could hardly be called a blanket.

"...... I didn't back down! You're only thinking of yourself, not me!"

Kurapika raised his voice with explosive emotion, even though he knew he would hate himself again soon after saying it.

If I had to say it, it was limited to words that could be understood as worry and concern for her; I barely swallowed the true feelings deep in my heart.

However, my face could absolutely not hide my true feelings.

Kurapika's face, reflected in Sora's night-sky-colored eyes, was not angry, but pitiful, looking as if he were about to cry.

Seeing that face, I felt even more inferior.

If you are angry, that is still fine. It is unreasonable, but if Sora herself is angry because she didn't take good care of herself, it proves that she truly cares about her.

Although he felt indebted to the other party, he truly wanted to repay the kindness, but Kurapika's real intention was that, besides repaying the kindness, he had nothing he wanted to do; reminding him was to cling to Sora, who was getting weaker and weaker and had to rely on him.

I was so happy I wanted to cry; he cared for Kurapika without considering himself, and he tried to hand the blanket to Kurapika as if it were a matter of course.

I wanted to be spoiled by these words, regardless of whether I was truly tired or sleepy. No, if I really lost control, I would rather sleep with Sora than sleep alone.

There was no way to take the blanket from Sora's hands, but there were no concerns.

However, Kurapika wanted to fall asleep like a child, immersed in someone else's warmth, at ease and carefree. I boldly hoped that I could obtain what I thought I could never obtain, what I lost a year ago, and that I could never get it back.

I don't like the wish to return to childhood, I don't like Sora, not giving anything back; although I know it is unreasonable, Sora tries to spoil me. Kurapika closed his mouth, grabbed the plastic bottle, which was still half full, and said, "Water, I'll go get some," then left.

Kurapika did not notice.

The more I wanted to drain the blood rising from the top of my head, the more I thought about my own pitifulness, and I didn't look around or listen to the sounds around me, so I didn't notice.

I heard the sound of something slimy dragging behind me, or the sound of something slimy crawling around behind me.

Weakly, completely unaware that Sora called him "Kurapika," he walked to the place where the pipe had burst and was leaking, which could serve as drinking water.

I didn't expect Sora's eyes to change, standing up and leaning against the Wall to chase after him.

＊＊＊

It was no longer the time for a child of Kurapika's age to be out of the slums, but Kurapika, who had been wandering for a certain amount of time, was in the slums regardless of whether it was late, broad daylight, night, or early morning. But I knew the public order would not change.

However, ignoring my vigilance more than usual was truly too vain.

No, in this situation, being as vigilant as usual or more vigilant than usual didn't make much sense.

Kurapika didn't know this, sighed, and walked around slowly with a plastic bottle in his hand.

I thought that if I left her, I would feel better, but although my frustration had subsided, my regret and self-loathing only increased as the frustration faded.

"...... I'm an idiot who will never learn."

Although I knew my personality was easily triggered, I couldn't help but hate myself for not improving at all, even though I couldn't count how much trouble I had caused because of that personality.

...... My parents, who mocked my personality for being like my mother's, although they were short-tempered, I found that my best friend told me, "I have a strong core that can go straight through." There. I wanted to kill myself.

Why am I the only one alive?

Why are my kin, parents, and best friend no longer by my side, or anywhere else in the world?

Kurapika kept asking questions no one could answer because he didn't want to be convinced, even though he knew the answer.

What if it wasn't you who was allowed to go out indefinitely, but the Flame Soldier?

Dreaming that the survivor was the Flame Soldier.

If the one who met Sora wasn't me, but a Flame Soldier who was different from me, who could endure unreasonable things and think for others......

"...... If it were the Flame Soldier, I could make her feel a little more at ease."

Muttering, what floated into his mind was Sora's cheerful and kind, yet overly faint smile.

He had known her for almost a day, but Kurapika knew she hadn't slept much.

Although I fainted at first, I regained consciousness in less than an hour. Since then, she had barely slept.

For some reason, she didn't want to sleep. The sleepier I got, the harder I forced my eyelids open.

I thought I had fallen asleep, but I jumped up in less than five minutes. Although I shouldn't have had the strength to get up, I still jumped up, looking around with heavy breathing.

It was clearly a reaction to having a nightmare, so even Kurapika, who had the lowest self-esteem, didn't misunderstand it as "I don't trust myself, so I'm careful not to sleep," but if that were really the case, I didn't know what to do, how to make her sleep peacefully and recover her strength, and I felt very helpless.

You don't even know what kind of nightmare you are having, and you don't even know if it's okay to ask this question. However, Kurapika, whose thoughts were increasingly focused on self-reproach, did not notice that the thought he had been thinking for a long time had fallen from his mouth.

"............ Why am I still alive?"

Ever since he learned that the Kurta Tribe had been massacred and he was the only one left, he had a question, and he also wanted to escape from this world without his brothers.

I blamed myself for being the only survivor, I cried until my tears and the sound of my crying dried up; I should have found the answer.

In order to take revenge for his kin, he lived to take back the kin who had become a heretical comfort.

I should have reached such a conclusion, that the rest of my life was for revenge and taking back the eyes of my kin, but now this answer was very wavering.

When I asked him to "help me," he replied "yes."

Until a year ago, I still dreamed of the Flame Soldier who was stolen, destroyed, and lost a year ago.

I thought if I were with her...... Sora, I could answer "yes" to the question "Are you having fun?"

...... That "dream" no longer gave me the strength to stand up from any difficulty.

It was only that he was the only one who survived; although it was trouble that appeared because the Elder solved the problem early, he should have been rejected because of that trouble, but because of the Flame Soldier's plan, he was able to pass. It had turned into something that made the guilt of survival heavier than it could bear.

When I closed my eyes, my brothers, who had been destroyed to the point where it would have been better if they had left human prototypes in their hollow eye sockets, criticized Kurapika's survival.

"Why only you"

"You lied, passed the exam, and then ran away."

"Coward"

"I won't let you be happy"

He knew it wasn't the ghosts of his kin, but Kurapika's own voice.

If he were in the opposite position, as long as the survivor wasn't the traitor who sold the Kurta Tribe to the Phantom Troupe, he would be happy that he survived, and would rather forget the Kurta Tribe and live a happy life from then on, because for the sake of revenge, I absolutely did not want to throw away all happiness, dirty my own hands, and live on.

Not all kin thought like Kurapika, but even so, Kurapika could not bear the feeling of loss; they were not the type of people who liked to be tied down, so he would feel guilty for not being able to bear losing them.

If I were to attain happiness, I might choose death because I could not bear the guilt, but I also know that a way of life that moves forward while accompanied by my unhappiness is a way of life that would sadden those I truly care about.

I knew from the very beginning that the answer I gave a year ago was merely to distract from the guilt of having survived and the guilt of not being happy even though I am still alive.

So when Kurapika met Sora and rediscovered his "dream," he fell into a predicament.

Because I want to live, and I don't know how to live, I just stand there.

Rather than being stuck in such a dead end with no way to escape, I dream of the worst kind of escape; I think I would rather end up with the same fate as my kin.

That dream Imaginary Uro but calling.

"Then, are you a brother from the field?"

"Hm?"

I heard a woman's voice.

Due to the nature of the slums, there are few female residents, but they are not non-existent. So I thought you were a beggar.

If I thought he was a beggar, I would usually ignore him and walk away quickly, because he does not trust people and has no room to do anything, but I turned around inadvertently.

It was such a vague and blurry voice, sounding like it was speaking underwater.

When I turned around, even though my eyes had grown accustomed to the Pitch Darkness, I could only see five meters ahead.

Kurapika could not see anything that looked like a human figure, but Kurapika concluded that it was "imaginary," but when he tried to start walking again, a wet, slimy "thing" stuck to his ankle from behind.

"!?"

Open your eyes and look around again.

Now turn your gaze to your feet.

Kurapika saw something grabbing his leg, trying to climb up, entangling it as if clutching it tightly.

"If you don't want it, if you don't want it, if you don't mind it, if you have no resentment toward it, why don't you give me a field?"

Like a mud man that is dissolving and crumbling, but that is not mud; a thick, putrid stench, hollow eye sockets, bare teeth, white maggots wriggling in the mouth. I understand.

"!?! "

I immediately covered my mouth with my hand, holding back the scream that was about to rise.

It is not that I did not want to raise my voice. Ever since I extended my rotting arm to Kurapika's mouth, this was just my instinctive reaction, preventing me from trying to feed myself to Kurapika.

Kurapika could not understand what this rotting corpse attached to him was, or what kind of situation he was currently in, desperately covering his mouth and nose with his hands and kicking the attached corpse with his feet. It was already in a semi-liquid state, and no matter how I kicked, the mud and flesh scattered everywhere, and the corpse that looked like the main body did not leave Kurapika.

And Kurapika's constant flailing in a panic, with the corpse clinging to the sludge-like rotting flesh, caused Kurapika to lose his balance and fall.

Kurapika fell to the ground, his back and head hitting the ground, but Kurapika still kept his hand over his mouth.

The rotting corpse covered Kurapika, gnashing its teeth in disgust and saying.

"I am a monster. This is not bad. But it is too late. I don't know what is bad. Even though it is tough. I don't want to do this. But my brother. Brother. Brother. Brother--"

Kurapika finally understood that this was not a real corpse, but a ghost.

As soon as I understood, I remembered.

The reason why the slum ruins where I took Root had no vagrants other than myself, and even if I woke up there, no hooligans would try to make money through things like "territorial claims," I remembered that the ruins were known for what is called "Exit."

About a dozen years ago, the public security in this area began to deteriorate, but when there were still legal residents living here, a Robbery and murder incident occurred in the ruins, where a female resident was drowned in a bathtub, and the corpse was destroyed. It was soaked in the bathtub for months, and when it was discovered, it had melted into a muddy mess.

Since then, rumors have it that whenever you step into the ruins, a woman's ghost will attack you, thinking you are the Robbery murderer who killed her, following you wherever you go, just like she did when she drowned.

In fact, I heard that once every few years, corpses drowned in places without water were found in and around that abandoned house.

However, Kurapika does not believe in ghosts, and it has been a long time since I became my hometown, but so far nothing strange has happened to me, so I thought it was a scam and forgot about it.

I realize now that the situation is indeed the case.

Judging from his statement, unlike the rumors, he does not think he is the person who killed Kurapika, and neither the information in Kurapika's memory nor his understanding could save him.

Rather, if the rumors are true, why am I being attacked suddenly now!?? This question grew larger, making Kurapika even more panicked.

For Kurapika, who has never had psychic experiences, let alone knowledge of "just in case," Kurapika had no way of knowing, but the reason Kurapika has been fine sleeping in a real haunted house until now is because he does not trust people, Kurapika believes in nothing, and even when he opens his eyes, he does not look at the surrounding environment, "I don't want to die, I want to be resurrected."

A ghost created by chance due to "Death Nen," having never practiced "Nen" while alive, so no matter how strong the "Nen" is, it has no substance, and the target and wavelength are also different. If they do not match, there is almost no effect, unless the other party realizes "there is something here."

I don't know if this "Death God" is a genius who opened his orifices without semen, or an obsession with life that transcends talent, but he is undoubtedly a powerful villain. Kurapika did not even notice his existence, regardless of how he complained, "I don't want to die, I want to be resurrected."

Kurapika harbors huge emptiness such as loneliness and hatred, but he cannot utilize them, he cannot utilize them. Field.

That is why I cannot reach the "Deadmind" from which I cannot escape if I recognize my own existence.

However... the shell cracked.

A cowardly, weak self that still cannot get rid of the shell peeks out from the crack.

I saw the "dream" I yearned for through the crack. I looked outward instead of inward. I recognized someone other than me, something, the "outside."

Because I strongly wanted to live, I exposed the emptiness of wanting to die due to guilt.

It is just that the dead did not miss the opportunity to take advantage of the void.

"Hey, why did you go out? I'm going to noon. Igideru is not good at all. Why, why are you so angry? If you are the same, if you are not, you are my brother."

The dead person dripped with rotting juice and rotting flesh, accusing Kurapika of still being alive.

Those words made me feel like I wanted to vomit in addition to the physiological reaction, but if I spat my hand out from my mouth, I would definitely drown myself.

I felt from instinct rather than reason that I didn't even understand the natural premise that I must not kill the other party's body in order to be resurrected.

However, in the corner of Kurapika's panicked head was calmness, or rather a kind of panic, a more logical thought.

Just as this dead person said, if I live like this, what should I do? I asked myself.

I can no longer find the meaning of life, and I don't even know if I really want to take revenge, but a year ago I thought I wanted to die like everyone else. I asked myself.

Then, wouldn't it be better to give this body to someone who wants to live?

A thought flashed through my mind: if this ghost or dead person could really be resurrected, if they could hand over the body, they would regain their sanity, and everyone could end happily without hurting anyone.

Kurapika does not know if it was a thought generated by Kurapika's own mind, or induced by the dead person in front of him.

But, at that moment, I certainly thought that I was better off living than living.

Thought............. But--

"Kurapika"

I heard two voices, two voices.

"Is it fun? ---I asked, and I could answer 'yes' from the bottom of my heart. Let's have a journey like this!!"

His best friend suppressed his own worry and anxiety, believing Kurapika would overcome any difficulty to make his "dream" come true, and made a promise with a smile.

I cannot answer "yes" to this promise.

Because everything has not yet begun. I cannot begin anything. Because I have even been deprived of the beginning.

So Kurapika's words were miserable and pitiful, yet... because he cannot give up his "dream," it is precisely the wish he does not want to abandon.

"………………Help……"

I do not want to die yet; I do not want to hand over my body, my life, to someone else.

Even if he cannot find the meaning of life, even if he wants to die again and again, Kurapika still searches for it in his own hands.

When I mentioned the "dream" I saw again, the person who called my name together with my best friend smiled and said.

"Okay."

"What are you doing to Kurapika, you rotten monster!!"

"!?"

The dead were kicked away by the best friend and the smile of the "dream" that surfaced in his mind.

Every time Kurapika thought of this, he had a splitting headache.

Up to now, you do not have to execute it immediately.

Sora ruthlessly kicked the semi-liquid torso instead of the head, so no matter how violently Kurapika struggled, the corpse that could not be shaken off was blown away, and Kurapika finally gained freedom.

Fortunately, the corpse of the dead was not real, so when the dead left, the rotting juices and flesh that had undergone Infiltration into the whole body disappeared, and the smell vanished as well.

Even so, the discomfort remained. On the contrary, when I finally left, the slackness returned a little; I understood what I did not understand, because of the paralysis caused by panic, what I was sticking to, this time I was vomiting.

However, before Kurapika's arm could even vomit, it was pulled down.

"Kurapika!!"

Sora pulled her weak body away to drive Kurapika off, then used all her strength to run and kick him, unable to stop her momentum, and fell spectacularly to the ground.

However, she did not care at all that she had fallen, as if she had not noticed it at all, immediately got up and sat on the ground, pulled Kurapika to her side, and hugged him.

Although he knew what Kurapika had been attacked by, knew what he was stuck and wrapped in, he did not feel any disgust, and without hesitation told him that he was here and still alive. He cried as if to confirm, and continued to hug him tightly.

"... I'm glad, Kurapika... I'm glad you're safe... I'm glad I made it in time..."

Could it be that the ghost of a rotting corpse is something that can be physically kicked in many ways? Kurapika still did not understand the fact that he had kicked that thing away, and continued to hold him.

I forgot the nausea that must have welled up in my heart; although I should have wanted to say something, I could not think of what I wanted to say.

Why are you here, even if I can't get up, is it okay? But how can you kick a ghost!? Kurapika's hand unconsciously gripped him tight, not even knowing what he should be thinking.

I wrapped my arms around Sora's back and held myself tightly.

Kurapika stubbornly grasped the body heat he had shaken off, while masking his embarrassment.

"Right... no no no

However, the peaceful time ended after a few seconds.

The dead person, kicked away by Sora, turned their face to an impossible angle using the force of the kick and complained painfully.

"No matter, no matter, don't waste money!"

"Yo, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go!!"

Kurapika recalled their resentment and obsession and shouted: "Sora! Grab me, because I am going to run away!"

However, Sora grabbed Kurapika's shoulder and stood up himself.

Just like that, I stood in front of Kurapika.

In order to protect him, he turned to face the dead and glared at them.

A midnight blue radiance rose, shooting straight into the blue sky.

The figures of the dead were reflected in his azure eyes, along with the boundless firmament far from the blue sky, and he said.

"... Is it useless to be alive?"

"Even if you could die with dignity, you cannot truly kill yourself, because you didn't even try to do anything wrong, so what is the point of resurrecting you?"

"I know it is impossible to destroy the body you want to steal for the sake of resurrection, because you can no longer resurrect, so you are just venting your frustration on the living, and for you, 'I don't want to die' is just an excuse to justify the eighth strike!!"

It had been less than a week since Sora obtained the "Deadly Evil Eye," but Sora originally possessed a not-so-rare "Evil Eye" suitable for capturing the world's disharmony and impossible things. This is why I have been tired of seeing ghosts since I can remember.

So I knew at a glance whether it really wanted to resurrect.

If you really wanted to resurrect, you could pretend more. When Kurapika turned his gaze "outward," when he realized his own existence, it was natural for him to launch an attack.

Most importantly, if you want to steal Sora's body more than Kurapika's, you don't want to admit it, but you have to admit it because you escaped from there. This body so close to me should be the perfect Container, but the fact that I deliberately targeted Kurapika is nothing more than an excuse to give me a body because I want to resurrect.

This dead person might have been different at first, but unknowingly, he had put the cart before the horse, letting the living suffer like him until they died.

So Sora had no intention of backing down.

"Shut up... noisy! Shut up!!"

"Sora! You don't need to say anything more!! Run!!"

Along with the dead person raising their voice, which seemed to prove that Sora's words had resonated, Kurapika also demanded that they stop Sora's provocation and run away, not to do anything dangerous.

However, Sora had never listened to Kurapika's requests like this.

"This is not superfluous."

While holding Kurapika with his left hand so that she would not step forward to protect Sora and would not collide with the dead, he pushed his right hand forward like a knight holding a Sword and said.

"Kurapika, I don't know what you said, but forget what he said, and never take it seriously."

"You can live, I want you to live, I want you to live happily; perhaps some people will envy and hate your happiness, but please don't forget, there are also people who wish for your happiness."

……Kurapika. I will help you.

No matter who it is, what it is, who helps you, who hinders you, obstructs you, or deprives you of your happiness, even if it is your own guilt, even if it is the god who gave you such a painful Fate, I will do it.

The dead screamed and made sounds, drowning out Sora's words, and jumped at Kurapika and Sora.

He probably did not like Sora, denying his own words, denying despair, and speaking full of hope.

But no matter how loud his voice was, Sora's words still reached Kurapika's ears.

Kurapika's ears were not drowned out by those ugly screams that could not even be called the struggles of the dead.

I am not afraid of anything.

Even if the rotting corpse that almost claimed him attacked him again, Kurapika was no longer afraid, just watching.

Sora flashed and split the corpse in two, and before the upper body hit the ground, Sora's gold and silver threads were buried into the left eye socket, and the rotting corpse disappeared like mist.

Then, Sora smiled at the "Ghost Extermination" that ended in an instant.

"Like this."

The man who had done something more absurd than the story he dreamed of with his best friend had a bright smile on his face, just as he had dreamed, longed for, and Stick to.

＊＊＊

That nightmarish dead man had indeed disappeared like a dream, and Sora's body swayed.

"!! Sora!!"

Kurapika held the falling Sora in a panic, remembering that he was so weak he had almost forgotten, and still found it difficult to get up.

For a while, Sora struggled to normalize his rapid breathing, so Kurapika kept stroking his back, even though he realized that as long as he comforted him until he could breathe normally, it would be enough.

A few minutes later, Kurapika's breathing returned to normal, and Kurapika also breathed a sigh of relief, but when her breathing stopped, Sora suddenly widened his eyes, grabbed Kurapika's shoulders, and pulled her away from her side.

"!?"

"Sorry! Sorry Kurapika!!"

Kurapika opened his eyes in confusion, Sora began to apologize, and then was hurt by the sudden rejection.

Sora was somewhat flustered for some reason, so flustered that he was about to lose his breath again; he just sat on the ground and apologized to Kurapika without saying why he was apologizing. Kurapika did not understand.

"Calm down, Sora! Why are you apologizing?"

"But... you don't like it, right? Like this... like this..."

When Kurapika asked directly because he was unclear about what was going on, Sora said hesitantly with tears in his deep black eyes.

So hesitant and reluctant to say it, Kurapika finally guessed the reason for Sora's words and actions.

"Although he helped me again, he didn't say anything. Kurapika thought he had misunderstood and raised words of denial, "Sora! No!"

But Sora said before claiming he was not afraid.

"Sorry! Although it's dirty and smelly, it's annoying to be hugged and held!!"

"No! What are you saying!?"

It was different, but Kurapika inadvertently stuck his nose into this mystery because he was told a diagonal reason he hadn't guessed at all.

Then Sora, looking like he was about to cry at any moment, his face flushed red, spoke little by little even in the pitch-black night with only stars and the moon.

"... Because... I can't even wipe my body clean, let alone take a bath... I don't have time to worry about it, but if you could help me, I would be very interested... I was worried..."

".................. You... you really are an idiot."

I don't know how you feel, but do you care now? Kurapika spoke his heart to the woman who was worried about this.

My impression at the time could be summed up in one word, "stupid," but when I look back, another impression arises.

Kurapika remembered that she had been a "girl" from the beginning.

However, Kurapika, who was too young to notice this, was simply stunned by Sora's worry that he would head in that direction the day after tomorrow.

"To the extent that you care or dislike these things, is there a difference between your appearance and mine?"

"Is there such a reason!?"

So, although surprised, I tried to follow up, but when I said it because of paranoid delusions, Sora denied it.

"That's not true! Rather, I absolutely hate not being able to touch you!"

"............ But... you don't like being touched by me, do you?"

Kurapika was dumbfounded, leaning forward and speaking passionately, but the lonely words that followed made him widen his other eyes.

At first, I thought "Another misunderstanding that cannot be understood...", but I realized this was not a baseless misunderstanding.

"Oh, don't apologize! Why must you apologize!?"

I remembered what I had done to her.

I wanted to cry, remembering that I was the first to get rid of and reject that kind of warm warmth.

"Wrong!!"

Kurapika cried because she wanted to cry, but she didn't want to cry because she didn't want to repeat the same mistakes.

He grabbed Sora's hands, who was startled by Kurapika's sudden shout, with both of his hands.

"No! Even I... want to touch Sora! I want to be by your side more! I don't want to leave you!"

The more I spoke of my pathetic, true feelings, the tighter and more painful the guilt in my chest became.

It made me want to die, because I remembered how incompetent and incapable I was, unable to repay any favor.

But... still, I was reminded that I could not let go.

"... Sora... I... you have been helping me, but I cannot repay you. On the contrary, I am just spoiling you. Even knowing this, I am a hopeless fool who rejects your kindness."

"... Being with you, the more you help me, the less I can stand it. I can't stand my own incompetence and inability, feeling like I'm about to lose the meaning of life that even I don't know..."

"... But still... I want to be with you! I don't want to be alone anymore! I hate living alone! I like being with you and Sora!!"

The shell that locked me in, that locked myself up, was broken.

I pretended not to see it in my shell, hoping it would rot and disappear one day... the things I couldn't throw away broke out of the shell and overflowed.

No matter how pitiful or guilty the desire, I still cannot let it go.

This body temperature and this person.

When I sought help, they answered, "Yes," and then came when I truly needed help. I cannot let go of this happiness that has already been answered.

A "dream" cannot be left ignored.

So Kurapika used all her strength to squeeze Sora's hand and pray.

"Sora... I... want to become strong."

Talking about the future instead of begging for help. Talking about dreams.

"I... want to be by your side. I want to be Together with you forever. I want to become strong enough to say I am... I want to repay you."

"I want to become stronger... and live on."

I cannot even think of what I want to do, I want to die, I cannot shake off the guilt of wanting to escape to the end of death, but I still chose to live.

I want to live.

"... Yes."

Sora, hearing Kurapika's wish, was confused at first; Kurapika suddenly said something completely opposite to what she had said and done until now, speaking instead of what she wanted and what kind of future she dreamed of. As far as I know, my round eyes narrowed gently.

Then, Sora, with a gentle smile, placed the hand Kurapika was not holding behind her head and brought their foreheads together, so that neither would look away, as if measuring their temperature.

"... I also want to live Together with you."

For Kurapika, who wanted to become strong, she would say "You can" and "Do your best" to support her wish.

He told me he had the same dream.

This sentence made Kurapika's tear glands burst, just like when a dream sees the face of a compatriot, and the tears that she thought had already dried up overflowed once again.

But this time, she cried without Stick.

Kurapika did not persist, crying and laughing.

For the first time in a year, I laughed.

"Thinking about it now, Kurapika's first psychic experience was really difficult."

After finishing talking about Kurapika's first psychic experience and ghost extermination after Sora came to this world, it was already too late for the first sentence Sora said.

"... Kurapika. You don't faint often."

"He hasn't had the courage to do strange things for a long time."

Sure enough, Sora did not talk about Kurapika's detailed actions and behavior at the time, because he knew that Kurapika's past was quite embarrassing, even if it wasn't a dark history.

Precisely because of this, even if an adult faints it doesn't matter, even if there is incontinence, she would not be blamed for the psychic experience being vulgar, and Killua was generally satisfied.

Actually, Kurapika's mentality is weak, but her nerves are relatively thick, so even Sora did not deny it.

"Wait a minute. You aren't talking about that guy Kurapika, are you? Pushing to here. Pushing away this guy who kicked a rotting corpse without hesitation."

Instead, Zepile rushed in.

Of course, this was not for Kurapika, because he knew nothing about Kurapika. However, since the first push point passed, I pushed it myself.

For Zepile, in the second half, killing the ghost god instantly was still okay. I understood "Nen" as Magic or supernatural power, so if it is so crazy and unfair, I can understand it, but how can I make a ghost that is a semi-liquid rotting corpse emotionally and physically? I really don't know if I can kick it away. Or rather, I don't want to know.

Zepile's thrust was legitimate.

However, Leorio patted Zepile on the shoulder and taught him that being honest is meaningless.

"Zepile... This is normal driving for this woman."

"No, I really don't want to kick that level of truly rotting corpse."

Worthy of Leorio's words, Sora also added a sentence and refused, but the two children looked at Sora's answer with distant eyes.

Senritsu guessed all kinds of things from their eyes and heartbeats, but she dared not believe her guess, so she pointed at Sora and asked the two of them.

"... Uh... impossible, it's already a zombie..."

"Competition."

The two expressed at the same time that Leorio's words were true. Indeed, Kastro's zombie had been dead for about half a day, so attacking them directly probably wouldn't involve any hesitation; this is compared to a rotting corpse, but no matter how you look at it, they were already dead. When Hisoka threw the shining Wizard of art at the zombie opponent, Sora's words were not convincing.

"Who are you!? Are you a zombie Destroyer!?"

"Well, it can't be denied, even I am a little sad."

Facing Senritsu's question and Gon's answer, Zepile rushed in again, Sora folded his arms and smiled bitterly, and I expressed sincere hope for my own curiosity.

"However, from a long time ago, Sora was really amazing."

Gon and the others decided to recruit players for Battera instead of buying me themselves. Somehow, he asked me for a story about a ghost that I didn't know if I should sympathize with.

"Other stories? There are many, but most of them are because of work, so I can't say much... Ah, there is one."

Kurapika did not wake up for Sora, but her state was calming down little by little; is talking about some things more distracting than continuing to worry, digging into memories, and continuing the story?

Others didn't do that, and although it was provocative, it was still interesting, so they prepared to listen to Sora's story again.

"This was also about four years ago, when I was Together with Kurapika..."

However, when Killua learned that he was talking to Kurapika again, his mood was a bit low. Although his voice dropped, he didn't stop listening when he left the room. Because I pulled.

"There was a period before we broke up, but Kurapika and I were always looking for 'Fairy Village'."

"... Sora. Is there anything I can do?"

Kurapika asked Sora, and Sora supported her shoulders and walked slowly behind her.

Kurapika wanted to carry him, and also wanted to be carried, because he had pushed someone already weak too far, but Sora stubbornly refused.

Thinking about it now, no matter how weak she was, with a height difference of more than 10 centimeters, being held in the heart by a short person, she must have been very uncomfortable.

I want to become strong.

I want to be able to say that I am Together with you not to get protection or help, but that I am Together with you because I want to be Together with you. Ask.

However, Sora's answer was cruel, because it was kind.

"...... You only need to be here. That is enough for me."

Seeing the image of his kin in those eyes, finding value in those eyes, finding meaning in her struggle not to want to die—how much she had been saved, to Kurapika, this sentence seemed like nothing more than a refusal born out of concern for himself.

That was why he bit his lip, almost frightened to tears by his own weakness, but not wanting to refuse unreasonably, "Hmm..." he simply replied.

That should have been the end. I thought it was over.

I think this was not an unreasonable refusal like mine, but a refusal based on kindness, precisely because I was thinking of myself.

"...... So Kurapika. I have something I would like to ask for your help with."

I do not know how much she has saved me.

However, I know this was not a refusal, but a statement from the bottom of her heart.

"...... Will you sleep with me?"

Kurapika turned around with a bewildered look, and Sora spoke up shyly.

She said she was afraid to sleep alone, that she didn't even have nightmares, she just couldn't fall asleep because she only dreamed of falling into an empty Abyss.

It was not to comfort Kurapika, nor to make excuses for Kurapika's true feelings and desires, but a genuine wish from the bottom of her heart to sleep with him.

When Kurapika said that sleeping with him could put him at ease, and that Kurapika's existence had a certain meaning, Kurapika tightened his tear ducts and replied.

"...... I understand...... Let's sleep together."

Say it and then smile.

A year ago, I thought the smile that had been killed along with the lives of my hometown and my kin had not been killed; it had been there all along, it emerged naturally, and you do not know what it is.

"Let's sleep together... and have the same dream."

Kurapika said with a smile.

Even if it is a nightmare, if Sora is there, if it is the same dream as Sora's, I feel that in the end, it will turn into a joke like today's.

Even if it is a nightmare, if she is still there after waking up, then it is just a dream.

...... Nothing more than a fleeting, faint dream that cannot rival reality.

Seeing Kurapika's smile, Sora also began to smile.

With the smile that Kurapika wanted to watch over and protect forever, she walked gently to Kurapika's side and held his hand.

Unknowingly, Sora, who had become weak and haggard, had her complexion with dark circles improve, and her appearance became quite neat.

Kurapika himself was wearing similar clothes and did not look like a vagrant, but Kurapika did not notice any changes in himself or Sora.

The surrounding landscape had changed from a slum of ruins and graffiti-covered Wall to a mountain covered in trees, but the two continued to move forward noncommittally.

The dream continues.

The faint dream that even they themselves did not realize was a dream continued.

Just for the record, Mr. Otoriya has nothing to do with the next Immortal King story.