Chapter 111: A Promise from the Heart

"What time is it now?"

A few seconds after responding to Sora's words.

Kurapika's hand, which had been gripping Sora's wrist, slid away.

It was unclear whether it was because she felt relieved, believing that even if she didn't hold onto it, it wouldn't go anywhere, or because she lacked the stamina to persist forever.

But a glimmer of reason had returned to his red-brown eyes.

Kurapika seemed to have finally regained some sense of normalcy; while asking for the time, he was panting from the fever, and Sora answered the question with a smile.

"Two o'clock. In the afternoon."

As Sora answered, he deliberately omitted the date. Senritsu and Leorio realized this, but said nothing.

Kurapika still thought it was the 5th, and the fact that they didn't realize they had deliberately hidden part of the information brought me relief.

To put it bluntly, Kurapika, who was on the same level as Sora and possessed a useless, even meaningless sense of responsibility, knew he had been asleep for a day and a half; even though he hadn't recovered yet, he could return to work. I was going to force myself to return to work anyway; if I could find out sooner, even if I hadn't fully recovered, once the fever broke, no one would want to talk about this jet lag.

In fact, Kurapika asked Senritsu if there was an Underground Auction and how his work was going, even though he had been told to rest for a while, so Senritsu answered with a wry smile.

"Boss Neon... what happened to the Underground Auction?"

"It ended up not happening. Apparently, the Underground Auction itself was cancelled starting next year out of fear of the Phantom Troupe. In exchange, the remaining items for this year will be held in an online auction sponsored by the community. Later, the boss reluctantly agreed, and I gave it to you."

"... That is a lie."

But this answer was discovered almost immediately.

The cancellation of the first half of the Underground Auction was beyond doubt. Kurapika speculated that the Phantom Troupe's bodies had likely disappeared when the Materialization time limit was reached, and the community sensed that the Phantom Troupe was still alive.

Even if one didn't know the Phantom Troupe's bodies were fake, one knew the Phantom Troupe hadn't been wiped out; when I said "beware of the remnants," they understood. Generally.

But Kurapika's employer did not meet the requirements.

"She came here for an immersive experience. I don't think she would be satisfied with experiencing the auction on a computer at home."

In less than a week, Kurapika had seen enough of the ignorance of the world from the girl named Neon, which was why she was so arrogant and selfish that she was younger than her age. Although I knew it was meaningless, I could see that I had encountered a lot of trouble.

However, no matter how many seniors had fans and connections, it was impossible for the community to listen to the selfish desires of a Mafia daughter who wasn't that big, so the result was exactly what Senritsu had said.

This was also the reason for Kurapika's concern about the details of "reluctantly agreed."

Kurapika didn't care if he said, "I've given up on you." When I hid my sleep, he could see where the person who had just woken up was, half-asleep and half-awake.

I really respect her intelligence, but why did she start hurting herself... Senritsu thought, but she yielded to the gaze that drew her to "tell the truth" and spoke of the part she had hidden.

"... I didn't lie.

However... the reason the boss went home calmly wasn't because she gave up on cancelling the Underground Auction... but because of Squala and Eliza."

"...? Squala and... Eliza?"

For a moment, regardless of the former, Kurapika earnestly wanted to know who the latter was, but immediately remembered it was the name of a maid under Neon. But as soon as I remembered, I brought it up, thinking: "What kind of people are those two?"

Seeing this, Senritsu smiled slightly and told him that she hadn't noticed the relationship between the two at all.

"The relationship between these two seems to be serious.

So... Squala wanted to run away with the Scarlet Eyes, Sora-chan..."

"Yeah, that Scarlet Eye... or rather, the No. 3 Auction Item, was estimated to be a fake. After I realized this, I killed the fake immediately."

Senritsu's explanation was certainly a reminder to Sora, but when I took over her explanation, he didn't know that Kurapika even thought the Auction Items were fake, and his eyes widened even more.

However, if the auctioned item wasn't a fake, then the attack on the 3rd would have been meaningless.

"And because I killed it too quickly, Squala escaped with the Red Eyes, thinking it had been stolen by the remnants of the Phantom Troupe. Well, it was an Auction Item at the time, and it seems the time-limited Materialization had expired, so when I checked with the community, it was quickly proven to be a fake, and in the end, it seems there was no punishment."

"I see... I'm sorry that it ended up having to be dealt with so poorly, but it would have been good if it could have been kept to a minimum... but what does this story have to do with Eliza? The boss? But what about it?"

When I said the Auction Item was a fake and Sora killed it, I thought Squala would lose the responsibility for the Scarlet Eyes due to a misunderstanding, so Sora continued to explain, and Kurapika was truly relieved.

However, I don't know if that story would lead to the story of "Neon reluctantly agreeing."

There is no doubt that Neon would cry at the thought of losing their treasure, whether it was stolen, lost, or was fake to begin with.

Because of a lack of thinking, Squala's story couldn't have made her feel threatened by the Phantom Troupe and return quietly. If you had the brains to think that far, or if you didn't have the guts, you wouldn't have caused a commotion three days ago.

Even if he was convinced, there was no need to expose the slightly awkward fact that Squala was dating a Neon maid; Kurapika's doubts would only deepen.

"... Your imagination is right. The boss cried angrily after learning the Red Eyes were gone. As for her father, he has some knowledge and understanding of Nen Ability, so when he found out it was a fake, he didn't punish me, but the boss didn't even realize it was a fake because she didn't know her own ability..."

So Squala was attacked by the boss single-mindedly, but Eliza protected him.

"... Please, don't stuff this person. No matter what I do, I will pay the price for the Scarlet Eyes, so please don't kill me. After killing him, he cried and begged him not to be stuffed."

Senritsu answered after taking over Sora's explanation, and Kurapika was at a loss.

Even if he was lost, he was smart enough to understand why, even without lies, Senritsu tried to hide what he wanted to hide.

Her concern for Kurapika was not that Neon no longer possessed the Scarlet Eyes, but his goal.

"... It seems the boss was shocked by Eliza's appeal.

To her, Eliza... the maids are not just her caretakers, they are friends, people close to her sister... I guess she is an important person the boss can sympathize with.

He seemed shocked that he was considered the type of person to stuff a lover of such an important person on a whim... If Eliza hadn't begged him, he might have really been stuffed. So... after saying that, he calmed down and went home by himself, saying the auction was over."

Reflection was already too late.

First of all, treating a maid as a friend is stupid. If it were just an ordinary lady and a maid, that friendship transcending the employment relationship and the master-servant relationship might have sprouted, but even though she made a mistake, not only buying legal things as a Human Collector but also putting herself in danger, a daughter who doesn't care even if the bodyguard with the longest relationship dies, stuffs the bodyguard into her own collection, and manages her own work—how many people can be trusted?

There is no doubt that the maids must have been afraid of her for a long, long time, thinking that if they offended her, they would be killed, and even their dignity after death would be insulted.

I thought she was speaking frankly, which was a complete illusion. He is not a good friend, and no matter how terrifying the story is, it is nothing more than a smiling mask stuck on him.

... I really don't want my friends to become stuffed toys, no matter what, no matter how unusual his physical characteristics are. Even if I think this behavior is disgusting, I know I am not trusted.

It is natural that she realized she should not be trusted.

Although I haven't come into contact with it myself, I found that among the people I accidentally collected, there were also people mourning their deaths. If it were someone important to me, it would be easy for me to imagine and think it is "disgusting," but if someone is not interested in me, I think it is just an "object." I noticed a contradiction.

Senritsu wanted to hide it from Kurapika.

Even if this is something I would notice immediately after recovering and returning to work, at least for now, I will buy some time so I can rest in peace.

An opponent as annoying as the Phantom Troupe came too late; in order to protect the correct part of myself rather than feeling guilty, I was shocked and felt disgusted, and I thought I couldn't save Kurapika's treasure.

I think this will cause him unnecessary harm, so I intend to remain silent.

But...

"............ Really.

I'm sorry, Senritsu. Take care of me."

Kurapika lowers his eyelids, and despite his rapid breathing, he answers calmly.

Not only his voice, but even his face and heartbeat are calm.

Seeing Kurapika's answer and his appearance, not only Senritsu, but even Leorio stares down at him with wide eyes.

Only Sora remains silent. Like him, she looks down at him with a gentle smile.

Opening his lowered eyes again, Kurapika sees the surprised expressions on the two of them, and he lies down with a bitter smile to answer their questions.

"... If it were me just now, it would definitely have touched a nerve... If you care about people other than yourself and don't want them to die, why do you still Collect human bodies??" The only thing I can think of is anger, thinking, "How can you do such a terrible and disgusting thing?"

... However, because of the Phantom Troupe, I was able to get rid of various things, and perhaps because of the Dream World just now, I cannot forgive her, but I cannot realize that she has bad taste in such a situation. I feel sympathy for the unfamiliar environment and begin to have expectations.

... The boss only knows a world where common sense does not work, because she is the only daughter of the Mafia, apart from being overprotected and boxed in. No one taught her the obvious. He doesn't even know that the people around him are not just Lobo that listen to him, but people with flesh, blood, and emotions just like him. Even a human body is nothing more than an object; she never thought about how it was obtained, and even if told, it is nothing more than the process of harvesting fruit in a rice paddy.

... That's how it is this time, if you finally think that everyone except yourself is a person just like you, and that what you are doing is disgusting, and now you only think of yourself in the end, this is self-loathing, but one day... if he truly regrets what he has done and wants to atone for his sins... that is certainly much better than dirtying my hands, annihilating the Phantom Troupe... much better than killing yourself and pleasing a corpse collector to get your brothers back.

I have such an expectation."

I believe everyone knows it is best not to expect that.

Kurapika did not do so because he knew. The more I expect, the more I hurt myself. Although the other party is guilty, retribution did not come, and the more I watch them live without knowing, this expectation hurts Kurapika more; I should have thrown it away.

However, I remember the expectations I had already abandoned, the expectations I had forgotten, finding them, and then picking them up.

I learned that the Phantom Troupe is not without blood, without tears, and without a human heart.

When this world was white and good, and when it was black and evil, I remember the day I learned that everyone is gray, not separated.

... The wish of "I hope so" came true.

Even if it is a Dream World that turns into foam, that moment was Absolute and real.

Because that world is the world Kurapika lives in.

That is why I just want to believe in it here.

Expectations are not a burden that hurts you unnecessarily.

Kurapika decided to have hope because he wanted to believe that dreams can come true.

Although she has a disgusting habit of collecting things, she still decided to believe in a girl who hopes for someone's happiness and writes down the future, in order to bring her there.

＊＊＊

"... Yes."

Even hearing Kurapika's answer, not only Leorio, but even Senritsu, who can read the other's mind through their heartbeat, looks surprised because he does not understand how he entered that state of mind, but only Sora responds with a smile.

She also knows nothing. Rather, he has no memory of "the sky," and should not know that Kurapika is overwhelmed by various things, yet Sora laughs heartily.

Those who pick up the expectations that Kurapika should have thrown away, as long as she wants to have them again, leave them to Kurapika; not only did I not give up things, I even gave up my own expectations.

To prevent being hurt, Sora not only made a choice that was not her original intention, but hoped that he would choose the path he wanted to walk even if he was hurt.

Looking up at that smile, Kurapika's chest is filled with warmth, but at the same time, it also makes that warmth spread little by little.

"... Senritsu, Leorio.

Kurapika's face twists slightly due to the pain in his moving joints, but he still sits up to ask the two of them.

He didn't say why, but he didn't ask anything either.

No one has told me to go to bed yet, and I turned my head away. I retched and got up to leave the room.

Only Kurapika and Sora were left.

Sora sits on the bare concrete floor, facing Kurapika with a blank smile.

She is smiling, but that smile is different from her previous smile.

Her smile is no longer a happy, sunny, and satisfied smile, but a smile with a bit of loneliness, more like an all-knowing Goddess.

However, in those eyes, there is not a trace of despair.

Kurapika reaches out to prove that no matter how much her hopes, expectations, and future are hurt, she will not let go.

I touch Sora's cheek, stroke the corner of her eye with my thumb, and ask.

"... Is it like this now?"

Sora's blue eyes look straight at him and ask.

I am sure it would be easier if I pretended I didn't notice and didn't know the answer.

But that is because the warmth filling his heart gradually solidifies before he realizes it, and Kurapika cannot go anywhere.

So ask the obvious.

"-Yes."

It is neither the beautiful azure at the end of the world nor the sky blue that lives up to its name, but its eyes are somewhere in the midnight blue that is close to Pitch Darkness like the night sky but still lights up.

The color is still dark, but even from a distance, Sora's deep blue eyes are very bright, and you can tell they are blue rather than black.

"... Yeah. It's always been like this. The side effects of overusing Direct Death might be the same, but it's not temporary. It looks like the default precision has increased."

"... What about your vision?"

"It has dropped, but my vision was quite good to begin with, so you don't need to worry. I think I'm still at a normal 1.0."

"You're not lying, are you?"

"If I were going to lie, I would say, 'It's just the usual extension.'"

Sora replies in her usual tone to Kurapika's question, answering coldly.

Telling him it's nothing. It's not because she is prepared, nor because she doesn't want people to worry, she smiles brightly again, as if to prove her true intentions.

"I really hope you don't have to worry. Or rather, I'm surprised that the aftereffects are much lighter than I imagined, so don't worry."

"I can speak now, but I think there is no hope for my eyesight."

"I think so too, but take that to the grave."

I could really speak now, but even now I didn't want him to talk about the results of increasing the accuracy of Direct Death beyond that limit, so Kurapika patted Sora's head as usual.

While being patted, Sora breathed a sigh of relief, discovering that although he was puzzled by the condition of his eyes, he didn't think much of it.

Without a doubt, my eyes should be blind; I can only see lines and points of death, my eyes should be more hellish than hell. Thank her.

What's worse, the reason Sora came to this world and Direct Death are the same.

If Sora overused Direct Death to that extent and recovered to normal, Sora himself would think it "impossible," unable to remember, and might open the lid on memories that shouldn't be remembered. That Goddess dared to leave it behind.

So, just as Sora said, there is no need to worry about her eyes at all. I know this is for the best.

However, in Kurapika's mind, the destination of these eyes might mean Imaginary Uro will not disappear in the end.

"……Kurapika?"

Just as he thought he was patting Kurapika as usual, Sora leaned over to look at Kurapika's face.

Seeing that his face was definitely not the color of the night sky, but full of Aogyoku pupils, he hurriedly drove the "if" out of his mind and said to Kurapika.

"……Sora. I had a dream."

"I feel like I had many dreams... but I can't remember most of them. I remember... the dream of the world was that in the final exam, I didn't beat back the thugs who insulted the Flame Soldier with violence, so my brothers were not slaughtered by the Brigade. Yes."

Sora ignored the sudden change of topic, opened his eyes slightly to look at the content of Kurapika's Dream World, and then smiled.

"That's a beautiful dream, isn't it?"

After all, it was just a dream. Even Kurapika himself didn't know if it could be called a "good dream," because he couldn't pull the fact that his kin, family, and best friends were still alive back into reality. He said it with a smile, just like the dream he saw.

Because I can't bring it back to reality, it is the only place where I can meet them.

Sora smiled, happy, as if this were proof that Kurapika's loved ones were still alive.

That is why Kurapika's arbiter and executioner, I, Kurapika, I do not allow it.

It is a good dream.

Kurapika lowered his head, holding his head with both hands, both affirming and denying Sora's words.

It is a good dream. It is definitely a good dream. I should have a good dream.

I want to make it a beautiful dream, but I can't.

The only thing I can pat is the curtain of despair.

"It is because of you that I no longer act like the thugs in my dreams. I dreamed of that time when I shouldn't have met you, and I didn't doubt it either." I can't help but think of you, because I remember you.

Thanks to you, I didn't lose my kin, my hometown, or anything else, but I... I... I spent all day in a daze, not having met you.

Without losing anything, I met Gon, Leorio, and Killua, became a Hunter, and lived a happy life ever since.

Thanks to you, I didn't lose anything, but when I forgot you, I... I... left you all alone."

When I woke up, most of my dreams turned into fragments, but I still remember them clearly.

A broken Sora, standing in the center of a sea of blood and human remains.

Because I didn't want to go insane, I pinned a glimmer of hope on it, and as a result, a hollow eye socket faced even more hell.

I cannot forget the ending of a Sora who did not meet Kurapika.

"... Alone?"

I can't get rid of it.

However, that voice reached Kurapika's ears.

It was a truly strange voice.

When I looked up, Sora had a puzzled expression on his face, just like the impression I got from that voice.

"She is laughing." Kurapika pointed at her and asked again with a face exactly like the Goddess.

"? Didn't Kurapika and I meet in that dream? If it's a world where the Kurta clan wasn't slaughtered in the dream, and I wasn't there, then I'm not really here, am I? Just like..."

"……No, we met in the end, but..."

"Then I am not alone."

At first, I didn't quite understand what Sora was saying, but it seemed Sora explained that he didn't appear in Kurapika's dream, and except for the reason Kurapika stopped thinking, he made a correction.

However, even after correcting it, Sora couldn't understand what Kurapika was saying, so he crossed his arms and tilted his head.

Kurapika's reaction made him even more confused, unable to persuade or understand.

"In my dream, Sora and I met four years ago, shortly after you came to this world."

"Yeah. Just like that?"

"……The Kurta were not slaughtered, so I didn't despair, and didn't even step into the slums."

"That's correct."

Confused, he continued to explain, but no matter what, Sora couldn't understand what Kurapika meant, and for some reason, Kurapika's trauma was dug up by that person himself. Maybe I was confused by my own insensitivity. 'Don't understand, I didn't even feel frustrated about the eight.'

"So... the Sora who met me in the dream... didn't die, but didn't live either."

"Probably."

I don't know if he was worried about Sora or just wanted to avoid being remembered.

Kurapika finally realized he had been misunderstood, and Sora was still waiting for Kurapika's answer.

She didn't understand what Kurapika was saying, but the part she didn't understand wasn't what she looked like in his dream.

She knew it from the beginning.

Four years ago, if I hadn't met Kurapika as soon as I drifted into this world, what kind of ending would I have met?

Compared to Kurapika, Sora's understanding of how he would collapse was much more accurate.

Kurapika looked back at him with a blank expression, and Sora looked back with a puzzled expression for a while, but judging from his reaction, he seemed to have realized her understanding of Kurapika, so he said with some surprise.

"If you think this story is inappropriate, do you think you don't understand?"

I know. It's about me. If I hadn't met you four years ago, I would have parted ways in a completely different manner than I do now. If I act now, I won't cause any trouble for anyone.

In that dream, I probably didn't have eyeballs, right? That is why I am more desperate now than I am now, trying to escape "Death"... That is why I lost control, killing the whole world indiscriminately so as not to see "Death."

He spoke indifferently about the possibility that the worst-case scenario might have already occurred.

To her, that broken self was not an impossible existence.

Perhaps even now, if you take one wrong step, it could happen immediately; it could be a familiar ending.

However, Sora did not seem to be frightened by his own "if," and asked Kurapika again.

"So? Then why am I alone?"

It was not Sora who met Kurapika; she had a strong resemblance to her kin, giving her something more precious than she could bear. Knowing he was a Death God without Hatsu, I asked.

Asking while answering at the same time.

I am not alone.

"Hey, Kurapika. Why do you think I am alone?"

"... I didn't meet you four years ago... You had no choice but to part ways..."

"We have only known each other for four years, but you and I have already met."

Kurapika responded by denying this answer, but Sora denied Kurapika's response as "not an answer."

I replied that I was never alone.

He denied Kurapika's guilt.

"... It's too late... Yes! Just like you said, there are no two eyes in Sora's dream! I am going to kill him too!"

"However... however, you didn't throw away those things that destroyed you! That is why... that is why... you... Sora!!"

"Have you tried dying?"

Not knowing why Sora said this, and not knowing what she herself wanted to say, Kurapika shouted; it was already too late, he could do nothing, and the dream ended in despair.

However, Sora responded quietly to that shout.

He spoke calmly and indifferently about the despair he had to endure because he did not let go, and the curtain of redemption was about to rise.

"So what happened?"

Just like that, put it in your mouth.

Even though it should have been the ending, even though it should have been the ending, Sora asked: "What's next?"

"What is wrong with you?"

It should have ended. It is already too late. Everything is new.

He asked what Kurapika had done, and what he could do when he had to collapse because the tragedy did not happen and there was no redemption.

Even if it should have ended, even if it seemed too late, even if it was already too late, I still believe in Kurapika's struggle.

"... I reached out my hand."

So Kurapika also answered.

"... I stopped you from trying to die."

No matter how broken you are, no matter how much you are covered in sin, no matter how late it is, you still hope for it.

In order not to end it, I answered to continue the struggle.

"I—I want Sora to live."

Hearing this answer, Sora smiled.

It wasn't strange or anything. Because she answered what she already understood, she showed a relieved smile, casually adding meaning to Kurapika's struggle.

"Then I am not alone after all."

Even if my heart is broken, even if my hands are full of unforgivable sins, if I can meet you who gives to me, it is enough to save me.

... You didn't do anything wrong, and you didn't lose anything. It's just a little late, but in the world you dream of, nothing important you want to protect is lost.

It ended in the middle, so it just left a bad aftertaste, but it was definitely a very good dream with a happy ending."

Kurapika's eyes widened at Sora's straightforward answer, and then she threw her upper body onto the pillow.

For a moment, Sora was overprotective of Kurapika's collapse and panicked, but when he lay on his back and put the back of his hand on his forehead and said something, I was relieved at the thought that he was startled as usual.

"... How should I put it, feeling guilty toward you is really too silly."

These words came from the heart.

Of course, this has to do with my dream, but also with my impressions of Yorkshin, the Phantom Troupe, how I know myself, and what I will do in the future.

I realized that the Sora in my dream was ultimately a part of Kurapika's own heart, not Kurapika herself.

She is Kurapika's Conscience, so no matter how much Kurapika wants to kill, she will not forgive herself for killing.

Usually, if you find a reason to live because you want to live, if someone wants you to live, if someone teaches you the meaning of life, you should be the kind of person who chooses to live because you don't want to die. I completely forgot about Kurapika.

Even if I didn't think of it, I should have known.

I know that if I shout "Stop" and reach out to stop her, if I want her to live, no matter how much her hands bleed, she will live.

—Because this is exactly how it is now.

"That's right, I do what I do just because I like it and want to do it, so guilt is just a Heavy burden on my shoulders, so throw it away."

Kurapika's weak words were said to be able to make him angry; he smiled indifferently and looked down at Kurapika.

Kurapika looked up at that brilliant smile, which really made her want to cast aside her guilt and scold her bad habit of being contemptuous.

"As Kurapika said, there is no reason to be angry.

... Is this okay? I heard some words while Kurapika was sleeping, and I have something to say to Kurapika."

However, Kurapika's reprimand was a grave pit and a jungle Snake.

Sora said while looking at himself and smiling, but the type of smile had changed completely.

His smile was as beautiful as a flower, but his eyes did not smile. Kurapika looked down at him with the smile he used when nervous. What on earth are you talking about!?

He had intended to apologize and Recapture what he had just said, but Sora said he only had a fever, so he wouldn't preach immediately; that was merely buying time. He wouldn't do that, so he gave up and accepted his first serious sermon in four years.

At the same time, the resistance that would be scolded no matter what interrupted his hesitation.

"I'm afraid you'll get angry, but I will listen quietly, so please wait a moment."

As Kurapika said this and tried to stand up again, Sora, who was preparing to cover for him, gently pressed down on Kurapika's shoulder, once again revealing a soft, reassuring smile.

"Yes, yes, you can rest once your fever goes down. Your fever is still very high, and your body hurts, right?"

"No, if the fever breaks and you feel better, it is best to preach now."

Kurapika grabbed Sora's hand; Sora was interpreting Kurapika's "wait a moment" as "wait until the fever breaks," and Kurapika stood up in response.

"I still have things I want to say to you, listen first.

Since I'm going to be scolded anyway, we might as well be scolded together."

"What on earth are you going to say?"

For some reason, Kurapika had recovered very poorly and could barely sit up, but Sora asked the completely astonished Kurapika with an admiring face and voice.

Kurapika looked at Sora seriously and said:

"Sora. I cannot fulfill your wish."

Sora listened silently to Kurapika's words and his answer.

Although it was sudden, she didn't even ask: "What are you talking about?"

I smiled bitterly, my face helpless.

It was like the smile of a Goddess, with helpless despair carved into the eyes, yet it was a different kind of smile.

It seemed there was no other way; although he accepted Kurapika's answer, he did not give up on anything.

Even though Kurapika himself had no intention of fulfilling her wish, Kurapika knew that even if he sacrificed everything of his own, he was still determined to lead her toward the ending he wanted.

Even knowing this, Kurapika still chose to throw it away.

"I cannot live a life where I kill no one."

Facing what Sora wanted to avoid most, denying what he wanted to protect, sinking into the place where he had fled.

"There is someone I absolutely must kill."

I stained my own hands and announced the abandonment of the right to commit suicide at the last moment.

"I—"

Kurapika reached out his hand.

He extended it, and Sora held her breath when she saw what he touched.

That was "death."

Kurapika, of course, could not see it. There was nothing unusual. There was no reaction when you touched it.

First of all, "death" does not always exist in the same place in reality.

But this was definitely the "death" from that dream.

She tried to pierce her chest with her hand below the collarbone.

I was about to force myself to the end I wanted to escape from most, the end I feared most.

Because the "death point" was right there.

Thus, Kurapika took Sora's breast. He poked his Finger below the collarbone.

Only she could see it, touch it, and kill it.

However, he was certainly touching and stabbing there with his own clear will.

"Your death is mine."

The smile on Sora's face disappeared.

Accepting Kurapika's answer, he did not deny it, but he did not agree to it as it was either; he was not afraid of being hurt or anything, and because he was full of compassion, he wore a crazy smile, that bloodless face looking as if it would burst into tears at any moment. That face made my lips tremble.

"…You… what are you talking about?"

"Just like this. I just killed you. I am responsible for your death.

Even if I die before you, no matter how you die, no matter who you are, the one who kills you today is me. If you cannot commit suicide… if you have long since lost that right… I will kill you."

Kurapika could not give Sora the answer she wanted.

The answer she wanted least was just a quiet reply.

"Don't be stupid!!"

Contrary to Kurapika's calmness, Sora raised her voice and shouted.

"Why are you doing such a meaningless thing! Are you atoning for me!? If that's the case, you've missed the point!!"

Grabbing the fingertips Kurapika had pressed against her chest, Sora's face twisted in anger and she continued to scream.

Sora, who was smart even when truly angry and never gave the other party a chance to take advantage of her, was flustered for the first time.

Flustered, she tried hard to make Kurapika Recapture his words.

"Screw you! I have never killed anyone for you!

Even if I didn't kill anyone, even if I killed myself, it's too late! When I fell into the furthest 【】, I had already decided where I would land!

After I finished living this life, at the cost of losing the future Heaven and Hell, the world after death, I survived. Even if I hadn't, I would rather fall again so that I could go to the destination I want to reach "now" with my own will… I chose it, cut it off, and killed it.

This is all for me, this is my responsibility, and it is something I chose out of my own will. This doesn't suit you, and it isn't your fault."

Sora shouted, then grabbed Kurapika's hand, which he claimed had killed him, and pressed it against her forehead as if begging him to cry again.

"…So, so you don't have to kill anyone. Keep your hands, commit suicide one last time.

Kurapika. There is a future after death. At the very least, the concept of reincarnation… reincarnation is recognized as the "origin" of the world of Magic. As a creature named Kurapika, you will never see your family and best friends again, but when you meet again, you might be another person with a different name, but even so, you might meet again… are you willing to throw away even that possibility?"

"Even if there is no such thing as memory, it is possible that even if Kurapika's existence disappears, everything of yours engraved in your soul will not be interrupted, and you will once again build the same bonds with the people you care about. There is... why would you throw it away?"

Every word of Sora pierced Kurapika's chest.

From the beginning, I was not sure if I really made her so distraught and sad that I wished she would stop being so attached to me.

But even if he made a mistake, Kurapika would not back down.

Non-negotiable.

Words once spoken cannot be Recaptured, just like a lost life.

No matter how much Sora clings to Kurapika, wanting him to Recapture Kurapika's words, it will not come true.

This is why it is a comfort, it is just a lie, even Sora knows it is too late.

Just bear the sin you chose and continue walking the path you chose.

"... That inextinguishable cycle of reincarnation also has an end.

Then... in this world, my kin died first, but if I die, I am just one step ahead of them, right?"

"How can you not know that is stupid!?"

Hearing Kurapika's unyielding reply, he raised his head and shouted with tears in his eyes.

"If you choose to have no future like me, why would you throw it away yourself!? In that case, you shouldn't have been born in the first place!!"

You are not an idiot to say that things that end one day are meaningless or worthless!!"

"Ah, I may be stupid, but I am not that stupid. Or rather, I am not trying to atone for you.

I am just like you, for my own sake, I decided that I will voluntarily take responsibility for your death."

Sora snuggled against Kurapika's chest and shouted with teary eyes, but was momentarily stunned by Kurapika's silent rebuttal.

Guilt also made him believe that he chose to sacrifice his own happiness as punishment.

But it was rejected.

Making Sora feel a sense of responsibility was not a lie.

If these sincere eyes were a lie, then Sora could no longer believe in anything.

"... Sora. You said my dream just now was a good dream because I didn't lose anything I didn't want to lose. Ah, a good dream. That is parallel. I wish the world existed.

... But I don't want to be the me of that world. Even in that world, I lost the thing I least wanted to lose.

Even if you tell me that I would be saved in that world just like now, I would definitely feel guilty in that world and couldn't stand it.... I like your eyes. It doesn't matter if there are traces of kin anymore. I like your eyes as proof that you are still alive, so if I see you without those eyes, it is selfish to say that no matter how many times you save me, I won't be saved.

That is why I want to live in this world with you, just as I am in this world."

Kurapika smiled slightly and continued speaking, Sora did not know why he would say such things.

Once again, the story changed suddenly, but Sora was speechless, still holding onto Kurapika's chest, looking at him with round eyes, and could only listen.

"If I want to revive the Kurta Tribe, I still want you to revive it, and I don't like that either.

It is stupid to ignore the future just because it will end one day, but it is even more stupid to Stick to a past that has already ended. I understand now that if you don't lose anything and don't make anyone unhappy, you cannot be happy.

I have already looked past the Kurta Tribe, I will definitely Recapture the gaze of all my kin, but that is to keep moving forward. To throw away the regrets of looking back, I take it back to mourn.

What I see in the future, what I reach out to take, what I hold in my hand, I live to protect what I hold in my hand.

... Then, Sora. Give me your 'death'."

Sora pressed his forehead against Kurapika's chest and muttered to himself.

"... Don't know what that means..."

I can only say this. I don't understand.

Kurapika said that no matter how much Sora himself is hurt, no matter what is lost, he will choose the lifestyle he wants him to choose. Cannot.

Compared to Sora, who became more confused the more he heard about Kurapika, Kurapika couldn't help but laugh.

When Kurapika was told "I cannot fulfill your wish," the same wry smile appeared on Sora's face.

"... I don't want to lose you. I don't want you to be sad. I don't want you to suffer. I want to live happily with you.

That is why I want the ending you are afraid of losing and continuing to fear to be as peaceful as possible. I don't think it is meaningless for you to try to protect yourself or others without worrying about being hurt, because no matter how happy you are in this 'now', the ending will be yourself. It is precisely because I am afraid of the edge of falling and the edge of melting that I also become meaningless, and I can only think that I am ignoring myself."

If that fear makes you rush to die even when you don't want to die... then I will go too.

I am not lonely Sora, even after this life ends, you will not fall and melt alone. If I finish first, I will wait for you there. I don't want to think about it, but even if you finish first, I will go immediately... so you would rather be angry. However, after the longest few decades, they will all be in the same place... so please wait a little longer.

If you know that the one coming is the undeniable me, rather than a soul that can only be thought of as something else after many reincarnations, can you bear it?

Even after it ends, the 'now' that will end one day."

Kurapika gently stroked Sora's back, grabbed Sora's shoulder, pulled her away from himself, and then looked straight at her and said:

I told Sora, who looked like she was about to cry at any moment, looked younger than herself, like a lost child, and looked tired of walking on an incredible path alone.

"Sora. Keep struggling. Keep struggling. Even if this life is exhausted, even if it is over, even if you run away and fall to the end, keep struggling.

This is not meaningless. This is not the end. I am sure there is a 'next' there. Believe there is a future. Even if you are full of despair that denies it, there is something that can dispel that despair. At least, this is what everyone wants. That is why it continues to create various lives while knowing the final ending."

Even if you are tired of walking, Kurapika will tell you to keep walking.

This wish is too cruel.

But this is what I can do.

Because this is what you can do.

God can only give up, but he is not omnipotent, so he is weak, so he can never give up. Because I look forward to—

Kurapika made a wish.

Neither God nor the Holy Grail.

Although I am furthest from that "normal" place that cannot be hurt, I hope that no matter how much I am hurt, I can obtain ordinary happiness, I hope my wish is fulfilled by someone who believes in me, and will never let me go.

"Sora. Together. Die and live on."

In order to survive, in order not to ignore the "now" because of fear of the end, in order not to waste even a moment of our remaining lives, after this life is exhausted, there is still a "next". Believe and pray for the promise in your heart, in order to break through.

Kurapika has not yet given an answer, whether this wish is due to the "love" or "love" that the Goddess told him.

I have never been able to extinguish it, but I still like Sora, because no matter what happens, it will not change.

Because I want to live together with Sora.

Because I want to be Together with you forever, no matter what.

Because I want to be happy.

That is why Sora answered the answer and hope he had given.

"--Yes."

Sora smiled as a large amount of tears overflowed from the Aogyoku eyes, which were connected to 【Death】, yet radiated a brilliance of life more severe than anyone else's, an Emitter of Hatsu.

After hesitating, he smiled and responded, as if he had finally found the path he should walk.

I swear to continue to struggle.