Chapter 21: The Cow Who Died of Longing

"Hey, you little Chen brat, stop right there; today I'm determined to kill you!"

Bang—

The main hall door of the Duke of Su's Mansion burst open, and the many servants and maids saw two figures dash out of the hall, one chasing, one fleeing.

"You come, you come." Chen Yan used all his strength to run, while shouting nonstop: "Keep hitting me, go eat a fart!"

"Alright, alright!" Cheng Yaojin shouted furiously, "You'd better not let me catch up, otherwise I'll smash your butt into eight pieces!"

"Eight pieces!!"

"I'll smash your head!" Chen Yan, also angry, retorted: "I even called you Uncle Cheng, yet you let Brother Chu Mo bring Qing'er to scare me—do you even act like an elder?"

"No wonder Uncle Yuchi calls you Cheng Laohei; your heart is truly black!"

Chen Yan kept running in circles around, occasionally leaping over various objects.

Thanks to his youthful, agile body, he managed not to be caught by Cheng Yaojin.

"You stinky brat!" Cheng Yaojin snapped, "Did you call me Cheng Laohei?"

"I'm going to beat you up today!"

"If I don't call you Cheng Laohei, what should I call you? Cheng Laobai?!" After saying that, Chen Yan laughed to himself, "You're not white either!"

In the main hall, the previously calm Cui lady, who had been sipping tea, heard this and couldn't help but burst out laughing.

She really liked having Chen Yan over.

Every time he came, it always brightened her mood.

"You little Chen, I'm your uncle, uncle!" Cheng Yaojin's face turned red with anger; even having the nickname Cheng Laohei was enough to give him a headache.

Now there's also Cheng Laobai.

If this got around, Yuchi Gong would laugh himself to death.

Chen Yan shouted, "Uncle, who are you calling?"

"Uncle is calling you!"

"Ah, I'm such a big nephew!" Chen Yan laughed heartily.

Cheng Yaojin was momentarily stunned, then, realizing, he roared, "Fine, Chen Yan, you even dare to take my cheap advantage; you really are filial to death!"

"Stop for me!!"

"Why don't you say you're teaming up with someone to scare me?" Chen Yan snorted, "You don't even act like an uncle!"

"No matter what, I'm your elder; did your master teach you to respect elders like this?"

"My master said, as Zengzi said: I examine myself three times a day!"

"I'm not wrong! I'm fine! I deserve it!"

Chen Yan made a big leap over the wooden rail and shouted, "Come on, as long as you can catch me today, what's the point of beating me?"

Cheng Yaojin no longer wanted to speak, his face flushed as he chased furiously.

At this moment, some newly arrived servants, seeing Cheng Yaojin so angry, tried to step forward to help catch the fleeing man.

But they were stopped by someone nearby, "You're the newcomers, right?"

"That's the Marquis of Weinan, the Duke's nephew; from now on, when you see this scene, just pretend you didn't see it, do whatever needs doing, and stay out of it."

A group of longer‑serving servants calmly explained to the newcomers, then actually got on with whatever needed doing.

They paid no heed to the distant chase and shouting.

They had long become accustomed to such scenes.

Every time the Marquis of Weinan comes, it's like this; the Duke of Su has never caught up.

Sure enough, after a bout of chaos, the two stood apart by the pavilion, panting and staring at each other.

Cheng Yaojin, seeing he could't argue nor catch up, softened his expression and said, "Esteemed nephew, the one who came up with the idea wasn't me; I had no choice either."

Chen Yan chuckled, "Putting aside whether I believe you, even if you didn't devise it, the black pot still ends up on your shoulders, doesn't it?"

"What's the difference?"

Cheng Yaojin: "......"

He thought again; initially only he and Li Shimin knew about this.

Although he didn't devise the plan, everything stemmed from Li Shimin's twisted taste, yet he carried it out in reality.

Now that Chen Yan is at his door, he can't just say it was Li Shimin's fault and shift the blame onto him, can he?

So this black pot truly has to be borne by him.

Cheng Yaojin's face darkened, "Anyway, as long as you understand, that's enough."

He said, "I'm too lazy to argue with you; just tell me why you came today."

Chen Yan, hearing that, laughed merrily, "I heard Uncle Cheng's family today had a cow that died from longing to the point of illness."

"To be frank, little nephew is very fond of romance, especially admiring a cow whose longing became an illness."

"Little nephew wishes to ask Uncle Cheng to hand over the cow's corpse to me, so I can find a fengshui auspicious spot to bury it; may I know if Uncle Cheng would agree?"

Cheng Yaojin was slightly stunned, then laughed in irritation.

He finally figured out Chen Yan's purpose.

In short, he's here to demand beef.

However, Cheng Yaojin had never before seen anyone request beef in such a fresh, refined way.

The divine horse especially longs for love, even seeking a fengshui spot to bury the cow.

Where to bury?

What place qualifies as a fengshui auspicious spot?

In your belly?

Looking at the boy in the distance, Cheng Yaojin originally intended to refuse.

After all, he's always been the one snatching others' belongings; when did it ever become someone else's turn to come and snatch his?

However, Chen Yan's next words forced him to swallow his excuse for refusing.

"Cheng Bo Bo, today this junior nephew still saw the furniture and tea from my home at His Majesty's presence; you say, isn't that strange?"

"Junior nephew, when did the things from my home get transmitted to the palace?"

"Oh dear, from now on we must properly hide the things at home, lest they be snatched away; otherwise we won't even know where they'll end up."

Cheng Yaojin, how sharp he is; upon hearing these words, he immediately understood Chen Yan was telling him: "If you don't give me the ox, you'll never want anything from my household again!"

Thinking of those novel items, Cheng Yaojin took a deep breath and still compromised.

"Only half, no more!"

As for why it's only half, that's naturally because the other half has already gone into his stomach.

"Half..." Chen Yan pondered a moment, nodded, and said, "Half is fine; then please trouble Cheng Bo Bo to have someone send it to my residence now."

"Qing'er, let's go home!"

Inside the main residence, Qing'er poked their head out, saw Chen Yan still not caught as usual, and ran over giggling.

"Young master, are you alright?"

"What could happen to me." Chen Yan shrugged, then waved at Cheng Yaojin, "Goodbye, Cheng Bo Bo; this junior nephew will come visit you again next time!"

"Get lost, scram!" Cheng Yaojin's eyes widened.

That look made him seem like he wanted to devour Chen Yan whole.

Chen Yan smiled, said nothing, turned and led Qing'er out of the Duke of Su's mansion.

After he left, Cheng Yaojin suddenly stopped panting.

The angry expression on his face vanished completely in an instant.

Squinting his eyes in thought, he waved and summoned Zhao Guanjia: "Go, deliver that half side of beef to the Marquis of Weinan's mansion."

"Yes, sir!" Zhao Guanjia replied respectfully.

Cheng Yaojin seemed to recall something, and added: "Right, also pick five clever, observant maidservants from the manor to send to the Marquis of Weinan's mansion—quickly."

"......"