[{"data":1,"prerenderedAt":-1},["ShallowReactive",2],{"origin-i-m-in-warhammer-please-don-t-praise-the-dora-te":3,"chapter-i-m-in-warhammer-please-don-t-praise-the-dora-te-i-m-in-warhammer-please-don-t-praise-the-dora-te-chapter-157":6},{"origin":4,"title":5},"chinese","I'm in Warhammer, Please Don't Praise the Doraemon Machine God",{"chapter":7,"nextChapterSlug":19,"prevChapterSlug":20,"totalChapters":21,"novelImage":22},{"id":8,"novel_id":9,"title":10,"slug":11,"index":12,"content":13,"wordcount":14,"created_at":15,"updated_at":15,"volume":16,"translator":17,"content_hash":18},2264980,4422,"Chapter 157: Huang Daxiong, the Master of Squatting on the Toilet","i-m-in-warhammer-please-don-t-praise-the-dora-te-chapter-157",157,"\u003Cp>“What a coincidence—we’re going the same way.” Zhou Yun’s lips curled into a smile.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>He decided to follow the judgment of the Fortune-Omen Machine.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Second Fardia Town—Zhou Yun had once lived in Nao Du Fardia in Asford, and this place clearly was a gathering point for Asford refugees.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>There, he might run into some old acquaintances. Zhou Yun’s gaze swept over the linen-colored clothes of these Asford people.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>This color scheme was strikingly, even nine-tenths, familiar.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Was this the chance to find the map?\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Upon hearing Zhou Yun say they were going the same way, the Asford people visibly relaxed their guard.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>In their eyes, Zhou Yun had become an ordinary Asford man seeking a ride.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“You want a lift?” asked the leader of the Asford group.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>The leader’s face was weathered, his chin covered in fine stubble, and a grotesque scar ran from his temple down to his jaw.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Zhou Yun recognized it—the mark of a Tyran blade, likely from a single knife-worm.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>The leader had good fortune—he’d survived a knife-worm strike without falling.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Zhou Yun nodded slowly: “I can pay for the ride.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>The leader hesitated slightly: “We need to discuss it.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>He turned his head and huddled with his companions, whispering.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Their voices were low, but they couldn’t escape Zhou Yun’s enhanced senses, strengthened by the Phantom DX suit.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“He really does sound like an Asford man—his accent matches the Thirteenth District and nearby major zones.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“It’s not that we doubt his identity; many still hold prejudices against our faith.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“True. Out here in the Red Mist, with no villages ahead or behind, a conflict would be disastrous.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“But far from home… sigh, none of us have it easy. We should help if we can.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“Don’t forget what the Hierarch taught us, don’t forget what the Saint demands—we may temporarily conceal our faith to avoid conflict; the Saint will grant His blessing.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Those final words settled the Asford people’s resolve.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>The leader lifted his head and stepped toward Zhou Yun:\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“Get on, brother. We must reach Second Fardia Town before nightfall.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“The nights in the Bahr Desert are too dangerous.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Zhou Yun nodded lightly and smiled: “Thank you. I will pay you.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>The leader waved a hand gently, signaling Zhou Yun to stop.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>He patted Zhou Yun’s back as he guided him onto the vehicle: “We’re all Asford people.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“Our homeland is gone, but home isn’t. We’re all one family—don’t speak of such things.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>As they spoke, the vehicle sputtered to life and lumbered slowly into the thinning Red Mist.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Seeing how easily these Asford people had agreed to let him ride—even offering to take no payment—\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Zhou Yun couldn’t help but raise an eyebrow: “I offered a generous reward.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>At this, the leader burst into laughter and shook his head: “No means no. Solidarity among Asford people is more precious than any reward.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Such a familiar feeling—Zhou Yun’s eyelid twitched slightly.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Had these Asford people shown even a trace of mutation, Zhou Yun would have suspected them of being Jijie.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>And outside the Jijie, the only group in Asford this selfless was…\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Shit. Could it be Leina? Has she still not given up on religious superstition?\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Zhou Yun’s expression turned slightly odd.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“Danton,” the leader said with a smile, introducing himself as Zhou Yun pondered.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>As he spoke, the scar on his face tightened slightly, making it look even more grotesque.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“Huang Daxiong,” Zhou Yun replied with a smile, changing Niouss to Huang.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>In the Lower Nest, the name Niouss had become widely known through Jijie propaganda.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Zhou Yun didn’t want to draw too much attention yet.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“Are you a member of the Ark Gang?” Zhou Yun asked the leader, Danton.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>At this, Danton visibly froze, then immediately wore a look of pride:\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“Brother, sharp eyes—I’m a former Ark Gang member. I fought alongside Lord Leina, Old One-Eye, and Lord Ryan Russ.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>He pointed to his scar as if it were a medal of honor:\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“This was earned defending the Ninth District’s entrance in the Lower Nest. That damned knife-worm nearly killed me.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“Thankfully, Saint Gileth, the Emperor, and Saint—”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Danton’s voice cut off—he suddenly remembered he was supposed to conceal his faith—and hastily corrected himself:\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“Thankfully, Saint Gileth, the Emperor, and the Saint watched over me. I was lucky to survive.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“Danton, you’ve told this story hundreds of times already.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>The driver, an Asford man, turned his head and joked:\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“Brother Huang Daxiong, watch out—he’ll tell you this all the way there.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“I could brag about this for life, okay!” Danton laughed heartily.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Then he offered a faint smile and shook his head: “Of course, compared to the true legends and the brothers who fell, I’m just a lowly grunt.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“I know my limits—that’s why I came to Bahr Three Stars.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Came to Bahr Three Stars? Hearing this, Zhou Yun paused slightly.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>But before he could think further, he saw the Asford men passing around a water jug.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>After gulping down a drink, Danton handed the jug to Zhou Yun.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“Take a sip. We’re about to cross the desert—it’s too dry.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Zhou Yun nodded lightly. He knew every drop of water on Bahr Three Stars was precious.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“Thank you,” Zhou Yun said, taking the jug and drinking. The dryness in his throat eased slightly.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“No thanks needed—just water,” Danton chuckled. “Back when I fought with Leina, Ryan Russ, and Old One-Eye, I’d have given my life—”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“Look, look—he’s at it again!” the driver burst out laughing.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Laughter erupted across the vehicle.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Hearing the laughter, Danton slapped his thigh: “Alright, I’ll tell you something else.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“I witnessed it,” Danton lowered his voice. “I saw Ryan Russ grow wings.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>As he spoke, the atmosphere in the vehicle turned solemn.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“Danton,” the man beside him shook his head, glancing at Zhou Yun without drawing attention.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“It’s fine. Brother Huang Daxiong isn’t evil.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Danton shook his head and turned to Zhou Yun:\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“Brother, I’m only telling you what I saw. Don’t overthink it.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“We’re all faithful good people. I believe you are too.” “Yes, yes,” Zhou Yun nodded approvingly.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>The winged figure in the white light laughed aloud, as if Zhou Yun’s piety were a joke.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“I saw Ryan Russ grow wings—white, tinged with blue, so holy and majestic.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“I saw him spread his wings and soar, like Saint Gileth himself, wielding a spear of light, piercing the Brain Tyrant in an instant, slaying the Tyrant.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Danton’s voice unconsciously filled with reverence:\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“Brother Huang Daxiong, I knew then—Ryan Russ bore something divine.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“Angels. Archangels—they must have been with him.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>As Danton spoke, the others’ faces also grew reverent.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Only Zhou Yun’s lips twitched with an awkward, fox-like smile.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Though Danton’s words were true, hearing them spoken aloud made Zhou Yun feel uneasy.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Clearly, some Asford people had already begun worshipping him as a Saint, an Angel, even a God.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>It sent chills down his spine—he was no god.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>!. Read\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>The winged figure in the white light shook his head, as if saying something—but Zhou Yun still couldn’t hear it.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>His power had not yet recovered enough to pierce the barrier between reality and the Warp.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Noticing Zhou Yun’s expression, Danton sighed softly and dropped the subject of Ryan Russ.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>As the patched-together vehicle drove deeper into the desert, the Red Mist thickened around them.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Even Bahr’s sun grew hazy and blurred, becoming a faint, faint dot in the sky.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>In contrast, the crimson scar stretching across the heavens—like a wound in the fabric of the universe—became sharply clear.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Zhou Yun glanced at the crimson scar above, recalling the legend that it had been carved by the Blood God’s blade.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>It hung in the sky, almost dripping blood.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“Brother Huang Daxiong, don’t stare too long,” Danton quickly warned.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“Here, unlike in the Nest, the sky is unobstructed—the Crimson Scar is fully visible, and clearer than in the Underworld.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Danton whispered:\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“Stare too long, and rage takes root in your heart. You grow agitated. You may fall into hallucinations and attack indiscriminately.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Why do I feel no effect? Zhou Yun raised an eyebrow but kept the thought to himself.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>He had some resistance to psychic influence; this indirect effect from the Crimson Scar likely had little impact on him.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>If it really has an effect, you could just chant the Rogedorn Clear-Mind Mantra a few more times.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>The vehicle slowly halted in the desert; the driver lifted his head and looked back at the others:\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“The car ran smoothly today—the engine seems happy, didn’t give me any trouble at all.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“But no matter how strong the vehicle, people can’t take it anymore. Let’s all take a break and grab something to eat.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Zhou Yun blinked in confusion as the Asfordians beside him nodded in agreement,\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>unable to resist clutching their buttocks, groaning as they rose from their seats and stretched their bodies.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Danton noticed Zhou Yun’s slightly bewildered expression and couldn’t help but chuckle:\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“Brother Huang Daxiong? Are you made of iron? How can you sit through all this bumpy riding?”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Hearing Danton’s words, Zhou Yun suddenly understood.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>After all, this vehicle was cobbled together—it was genuinely bumpy.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>But Zhou Yun truly had an iron butt; beneath the clay-formed fake buttocks lay the shock-absorbing metal buttocks of the Ghost Thief DX suit.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Thinking of this, he grinned:\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“I trained this by squatting on the toilet for years—I can now squat for ten thousand years straight.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Danton burst out laughing: “You’re something else. Come on down and have some food.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Zhou Yun climbed out of the vehicle; Danton pulled several pills from his pocket and handed them out to everyone present.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>These were radiation-prevention pills—essential for life on most planets of the Crimson Scar.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Without taking them, one might mutate under the Crimson Scar’s dangerous radiation.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Zhou Yun picked one up and popped it into his mouth, though he didn’t need it.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>The Asfordians began unloading food from the vehicle; while they weren’t looking, Zhou Yun pulled several portions of Fire Scorpion Meat from his fourth-dimensional pocket—items he’d taken from the Blood Scorpion Tavern—and also produced a bottle of Old One-Eye’s old Crimson Wine.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Asford had been consumed by flames; Old One-Eye’s whereabouts were now unknown. This wine was a bottle less with every sip.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>By the time Danton and the others had brought the food down, Zhou Yun had already pried open the bottle.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Danton stared, stunned and bewildered, at the scorpion meat and the Crimson Wine in Zhou Yun’s hand.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“Where did you pull all this from?” Danton couldn’t help asking.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Zhou Yun smiled without answering, instead bringing Old One-Eye’s Crimson Wine close to Danton’s face.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“Smell it,” Zhou Yun said with a grin.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Danton involuntarily sniffed—and immediately caught a sharp, familiar, sweet wine aroma.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“This… this is the smell of Asford,” Danton murmured dazedly.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“I brought it out from Asford,” Zhou Yun gestured for Danton to fetch some containers for the wine.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Danton nodded urgently, quickly retrieving several metal cups from the vehicle and wiping them clean.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>All the Asfordians watched expectantly as Zhou Yun poured the Crimson Wine into the cups—the vivid red liquid bubbled and churned, releasing a scent utterly unlike that of Bar II.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>This was wine, brewed in Asford, by Asfordians, using Asfordian methods and ingredients.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Zhou Yun handed a cup to each Asfordian present.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Danton’s hand trembled as he accepted his cup.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“To Asford.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Zhou Yun lightly clinked his cup against Danton’s and said:\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“To you, and to all who lived and died.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“To Asford,” the other Asfordians murmured, raising their cups one by one.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“To Fedia City!” “To the Underworld System!” “To Lady Leina!” “To Lord Lane Rus!” “To the warriors of Cardian and the Ark Gang!” “To the Holy Blood Angels!”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Danton downed a deep gulp of the thick, crimson wine; his eyes glistened as he raised his cup and shouted:\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“To Asford! To Holy Doraemon!”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“Danton!” The Asfordians beside him gasped in shock; Danton instantly realized his mistake.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>At the sound of “To Holy Doraemon,” Zhou Yun’s lips twitched involuntarily.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Danton’s face flushed with embarrassment: “Brother Huang Daxiong, actually we—”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“Hm?” Before Danton could finish, Zhou Yun frowned.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>He sharply turned his head toward the thick crimson mist behind him—his enhanced vision caught sight of:\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Two figures slowly emerging from the swirling crimson mist—two towering, muscular silhouettes over two meters tall.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>The winged figure in Bai Guang let out a mournful, almost agonized sigh.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Still yesterday’s Gu, keep recommending.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>(End of Chapter)\u003C\u002Fp>",2072,"2026-06-19T20:02:14.192Z",1,"Qwen3-Next 80B","92cab4d2d08eaa35ed9247299290f2791f0cda0f2baa27f2a4aab2996ed69a46","i-m-in-warhammer-please-don-t-praise-the-dora-te-chapter-158","i-m-in-warhammer-please-don-t-praise-the-dora-te-chapter-156",711,"https:\u002F\u002Fnovelzhen.com\u002Fimages\u002Fcovers\u002Fi-m-in-warhammer-please-don-t-praise-the-doraemo-cover.jpg"]