Chapter 271: Old Times and New Days

The sun and moon lack vigor, the heavenly light is dim.

Zhoufu, a hundred li from Dun Cheng, remains utterly silent.

Chinu, Chinu......

Chinu could no longer distinguish the pain coming from all sides, whether it was bodily pain or spiritual pain.

He merely had another great dream.

In his dream, he was still in that small Orphanage beneath Jinling City.

During the day he could not grab much food, and at night he was always hungry enough to feel heartburn.

How old was he then?

Four years old?

Five years old?

Six years old?

Having nothing to eat, he could hardly understand the integrity and backbone spoken of by his enlightenment teacher during the day.

Having nothing to eat, he had to think of every way to fill his stomach and delay the hunger.

He had tried many things: the tree roots in the yard, the teacher's hemp paper, the occasional small insects in the grass......

When there really was nothing to eat, even the chipped rim of a coarse porcelain bowl would be gnawed on by him for a few bites.

But no matter how much he gnawed, it seemed impossible to compare with real food, let alone fill his stomach.

The hunger of his growing body in youth was painful and pure.

He dared not tell anyone of this pain, and he feared even more hearing someone like Yu Baobao ask, "Why don't you eat?" "Isn't this the Orphanage? Surely you can't be short of a mouthful of food," and similar remarks.

Some suffering is hard for outsiders to speak of.

Even if one does not understand this suffering, one should still grasp a simplest principle......

For example, where can a child go to be as good as being beside his parents?

The Orphanage could be established thanks to an imperial decree.

The Orphanage could endure largely due to regular, fixed allocations of funds and grain from the government, as well as donations from various benefactors.

When funds and grain run out, destitution does not cease.

From its inception, the Orphanage was destined to be unable to provide everyone with enough food and warm clothing.

After all, if people knew this was a place where one could eat well and wear warm clothes, it would be far better than the poor families, and thus more people would abandon children......

So-called——

If the Orphanage wafted a bit of meat aroma the previous night, the next day its doorstep would be swarmed by hundreds of children.

Actually, this is not entirely a joke.

Managing livelihood has always been a difficult matter.

The Orphanage, pinching funds, had the children wear old clothes passed from bigger to smaller, then smaller to even smaller, until finally no one knew how many hands the garments had gone through......

As for food, it was merely enough to stave off hunger.

In the Orphanage, everything depended on standing out.

【Be good】 【Be useful】 【Be smart】......

Chinu had heard these words countless times from an early age.

But the half-spoonful of food that accompanied these words would nonetheless truly move him.

During his long years of hunger, whenever these praises sounded, it meant he could eat an extra bite and wake fewer times from hunger at night......

He could also have more pleasant dreams.

Even his pleasant dreams at that time were inseparable from others.

For example, today a child is adopted by a carpenter's family; that night he would dream of the unique scent of wood shavings on the carpenter.

The carpenter's gaze swept over the hundreds of smiling-faced children in the Orphanage, ultimately not landing on the child actually chosen in reality, but instead falling on him.

Afterward, he, like all the children taken away, proudly and smugly took the hand of his new parents, turned back, and smilingly told the unchosen children, "I'm leaving!"

That was the most glorious day for every Orphanage child, and everyone looked forward to its swift arrival.

Unfortunately, in his youth he had a sharp mouth and monkey cheeks, a frail body; even though his face ached each time he smiled, no one chose him.

He still could only wander idly around the Orphanage, hoping someone would notice him and let him do some chores, after which he could eat an extra bite.

Most of his childhood passed in this way.

Indeed, it was all like that.

However, however......

In this dream of recollection, however, things seemed somewhat different from the ordinary.

He recalled some little-known scenes from the long years——

It was an utterly ordinary day, and he helped some children wipe the chairs in the outer hall.

The matron steward stood not far away, watching the children in this room who were not very handy work.

He focused on wiping the chairs, not realizing when a furtive figure had appeared outside the door.

The matron steward shouted at her, scolding:

"No abandoning children here! If you dump one, I'll throw the child out!"

The matron's voice was always loud, and everyone feared her.

He lifted his head and saw that at the doorway was a woman heavily made up to the point her brows and eyes were indistinct, wearing a vermilion jacket and skirt, with a large teal-green cloth bag at her feet, her whole appearance a riot of colors like a garish, eye‑catching bird.

The woman seemed somewhat uneasy, placing the bundle behind her across the threshold, then wringing her handkerchief as she apologetically smiled:

"Older sister, I'm not here to abandon a child; I'm here to deliver something……"

"I rarely come out; I've exchanged the silver I'd saved for a long time into some grain, intending to donate it to the Orphanage."

When there were charitable donations, it meant they could have a decent meal in the evening.

Therefore, despite being young, he couldn't help but glance several more times, thinking he needed to start lining up for food earlier tonight.

But strangely, the stewardess grandma, who usually valued donations highly, did not accept that bulging cloth bag today.

The stewardess grandma merely scolded again:

"...... We here would never sell children to a brothel, so give up that idea!"

"Take the things away! Who wants your trinkets that are like a thousand-person ride, ten-person pillow?"

At that time, he didn't know what a brothel was, nor did he know that flashy clothing were essential items there; a perceptive person could tell at a glance the difference between them and ordinary folk.

He only knew that the stewardess grandma was truly angry; at night, not to mention eating his fill, he likely wouldn't get any food at all.

Nothing was more important than having a full meal.

Thus, like the other children, he felt somewhat uneasy.

The woman, after being scolded, did not talk back, as if accustomed to it, and merely cried again:

"I, I didn't mean it that way......"

"I only... before, I once asked someone to leave a child at the doorstep; I have been tormented for many years, enduring the pain of separation from flesh and blood, daring not to see him...... Now I have fallen ill, and I don't know when I will die; I really can't hold back......"

The woman's sobs were hesitant, and the cheap rouge and powder on her face smeared, revealing faint signs of fatigue.

But the stewardess grandma was unmoved; she somehow grabbed a feather duster, covered her mouth and nose, and drove the person out.

"...... You actually dare to run into the Orphanage while sick!"

"If you truly meant well, you should pretend you never gave birth, and never let your child know his mother is a prostitute!"

The woman, unable to match the tall and sturdy stewardess grandma, could only wear what she considered her most decent clothing, and left with a tear-streaked, disheveled face.

Chinu remembered that day.

Chinu remembered that day.

More than twenty years passed, and Chinu finally recalled that day.

He poked his head out to look, wanting to see whether that sack of grain had been taken away, and saw the woman stumbling and crying past the street corner.

The woman was weeping, the woman was going mad.

The woman would tell anyone she met:

"...... I have a child, I have a child."

"I truly gave birth to one...... I, I just miss him too much...... he, he won't despise me......"

The mad figure raving in the street gradually overlapped with his own mad figure wandering the city.

Equally disheveled, equally insane.

As it turned out, as it turned out, in those bygone days, they......

They, mother and son, had actually once passed each other by.

When Chinu woke up crying, everything had become clear.

The heavens and earth remained dim, but fortunately, this time someone wiped away his tears for him.

Du Shanü had long been beside his sickbed listening to her good slave slave cry for a long while; seeing him awaken, she gently wiped his tears bit by bit, then spoke softly:

"Half a day ago, Afang received a report from the servants saying you had suffered grave injuries and could not return to the city, so I thought to come to Zhoufu to find you."

"Ah Nu, don't cry; the past is all over...... I and the child are both here now."

?? Here it comes, here it comes||ヽ(*￣▽￣*)ノミ|Ю