Chapter 307: Beast-Milk Brat

Ye Tian Di helplessly opened his eyes in his own Dao realm; he had just seen a divine light pierce through the Immortal Homeland, tracing back to its origin, and instantly understood what had happened.

Then he heard Huang Tian Di's voice; barely had he dispelled that attack when Huang Tian Di's figure appeared beside him in perfect sync.

"Got any tea?"

"Yes."

In the instant the words fell, a small fire stove appeared beside them, with a plain iron teapot brewing tea atop it.

"You seem awfully idle lately," Huang Tian Di said, picking up the boiling teapot and pouring himself a cup; "In some world, a powerful being—perhaps out of sudden whim, perhaps sheer boredom—deduced my existence from mortal legends."

"Really? That's impressive," Ye Tian Di said without changing expression. "What happened after?"

"At first I ignored him; beings idle enough to deduce truths from mortal fantasies are rare," Huang Tian Di said, pinching a floating tea leaf from the brew and examining it. "He was wise enough—once he sensed the karmic weight, he severed ties. I'd actually intended to summon him."

"Mm-hmm," Ye Tian Di nodded. "In a way, he really is idle. By the way, what were you asking me just now?"

"What's the deal with your past self? Why did you deliberately split it off?" Huang Tian Di set down his teacup and spoke bluntly. "Don't think your interference fooled me—I saw it. That flute he played carried karmic traces, and now the one holding it is that guy who flashed through the void and blinded the eyes. He's got a stubborn life. How did you two end up together?"

"Tch. One moment's distraction and trouble arises. If I hadn't been mingling with you three just now, I wouldn't have touched this thing," Ye Tian Di said, a flash of light appearing in his hand as he gazed at the gilded jade flute with repaired seams. "Can't Su Niuma collect something with cleaner origins?"

"Trouble? You black-hearted Ye!" Huang Tian Di frowned at Ye Tian Di. "What are you secretly scheming behind our backs?!"

"Look for yourself," Ye Tian Di said, displeased at the nickname, and ceased concealment, letting Huang Tian Di observe freely.

In but an instant.

"Take me with you," Huang Tian Di said to Ye Fan. "Or I'll tell the others."

"Has your mindset gotten too youthful lately?" Ye Tian Di narrowed his eyes. "Go find it yourself. Expose time-space before it. Let it pull you in."

"Why didn't you say so earlier? Now I have to find it myself," Huang Tian Di patted his body. "Why hide things from us? If anyone asks, say I'm traveling—don't say anything else."

You're so aloof, so noble—yet you're just as sneaky, always trying to get the early release!

Ye Tian Di gave a cold, humorless smile and made a gesture of "do as you please."

Huang Tian Di vanished in a flash; time and age meant nothing to them, but matters of consequence required personal involvement.

"By the way," Huang Tian Di extracted a fragment from the endless sea of time, adjusted it slightly, then restored it: "Let's say hello first—Wo Long, hehehe."

Ye Tian Di picked up the tea leaf left behind, smiled faintly, and cast it toward the distant past.

"Beast-milk brat."

"Wow, didn't know you could play the flute?" Su Lin opened his mouth. "I've had this score but never played it—honestly, it's really beautiful."

There, Ye Fan finished playing, twirling the jade flute in his hand before gripping it backward, raising a wine goblet toward the moon with his other hand.

"I know far more than you realize," Ye Fan said as the Zui Xian Niang poured down his throat, not a drop wasted. "By the way, what's the connection between Zhuge Liang and this tune?"

"When did I say anything about Zhuge Liang?" Su Lin stood still, thinking long and hard, then suddenly realized: "I meant Wo Long—your brother, Shi Hao."

"What the hell are you talking about? I don't get it," Ye Fan shook his head. "Shi Hao has a tune—where's mine?"

"You ask me, who do I ask?" Su Lin, after downing several cultivators, walked over, took back the jade flute, and grabbed a cloth to clean it.

"Look all you want, but don't touch it or speak of it—if it brings karmic consequences, I can't handle it."

"Let me try," Xiao Yan reached out to touch the jade flute, but Su Lin pushed him away with disdain.

Due to the earlier commotion and Yao Lao's interference, Xiao Yan, Han Li, Zhang Chuyan, and others had briefly regained clarity, but soon picked up the Zui Xian Niang again for another round—after all, the pain of forced sobriety could only be suppressed by more Zui Xian Niang.

"One bottle of Zui Xian Niang costs thirty thousand divine sources. Today we've probably spent six or seven more than planned," Su Lin glanced at the bottle he was sipping through a straw, calculated on his calculator, then charged it all to Ye Fan: "You owe me two hundred ten thousand divine sources. Round it up to three hundred thousand. Remember to pay me next time."

Ye Fan froze. He vaguely recalled someone saying today's expenses were covered. He stepped forward, picked up the calculator on the table—"Reset."

Xiao Yan: "Another bottle."

Lu Mingfei: "Another bottle."

Han Li: "Another bottle."

"This side's empty too, boss—another bottle! The cake's gone too. Weird—wasn't it right here just now?" Xing circled the table, then said: "Hey! Who ate my shrimp from the trash?"

Thud thud thud!

"How's this Zui Sheng Meng Si empty too?" Zhang Chuyan patted the tin container holding Zui Sheng Meng Si, puzzled. "Who's this big a drinker? He's practically a living wine barrel."

He finished speaking, raised his wine goblet to sip—only to find himself drinking air.

"What the hell?! When did I finish it?!"

Li Huowang raised his head drowsily and saw someone beside him wolfing down food, gulping Zui Xian Niang straight from the bottle.

"Friend, slow down," Li Huowang said. "This wine gets you drunk fast."

It was a tall youth with skin as translucent and luminous as jade, a refined and handsome face, thick black hair, now chewing food voraciously.

"Gulps," the youth swallowed a mouthful of Zui Xian Niang. "No problem, I'm not afraid. By the way, this table's out of wine too—where else can I find wine and food like this? This wine helps me a lot."

"Aren't there still plenty left?" Li Huowang frowned. He remembered drinking another cup just earlier when he woke up from the noise—there was clearly still half a bottle left.

Even if this guy could drink, he couldn't finish half a bottle that fast. Everyone else was sipping slowly.

The youth was about to speak when the jade bottle in his hand suddenly emitted dense immortal energy; the fragrance filled his nostrils. He looked closely—the bottle now held half a bottle of wine again.

His eyes lit up. He lifted the bottle and drank straight from it. For a moment, he swayed as if about to collapse—but within moments, he recovered, his complexion noticeably improved.

Gulps, gulps.

"Now it's gone," the youth shook the bottle.

"These are provided by Brother Su Lin—look over there," Li Huowang felt strange but, under Zui Xian Niang's influence, lacked the energy to think—just pointed to the side. "Brother Su Lin said if you finish it, just go get more."

"I see," the youth wiped his greasy lips, picked up an empty bottle, and walked over. "Thanks, brother."

"No problem," Li Huowang adjusted his sleeping posture and fell asleep again.

Here, no one would harm him, so lowering vigilance was fine.

"I wonder if Brother Zhuge is having fun inside the Simulation Universe. Hong Zhong made a friend named A Meng a few days ago—I hope he doesn't get scammed too badly."

"Brother Zhuge, why do you say you're fake? I can bring you back to life."

When awake, questions fester in the heart; when drunk, these worries surface on their own.

Well then, asleep, one needn't care about any of it.

"Miaomiao, I won't let anything happen to you."

Glug glug glug

"Finished? Bring another bottle."

Su Zongzhu stared at the boy before him, unable to pinpoint what felt off—he clearly remembered giving him a fresh bottle of Zui Xian Niang just minutes ago; how had he finished it again?

The man stood right before him, like an endless wine barrel, pouring Zui Xian Niang down his throat cup after cup, until finally he just hugged the bottle and drank straight from it.

Bottle after bottle—how many was this now?

"Didn't you say we could drink freely tonight?" The boy's eyes sparkled with anticipation, blinking brightly. "Is there any food? There's nothing left to eat here—do you still have that sweet thing from before?"

"Cake?" Su Zongzhu glanced at the empty table, dazed, and pulled out another Church Holy Scripture Cake, then another bottle of Zui Xian Niang.

Strange.

How can someone drink this much?

"One bottle of Zui Xian Niang costs so much—I wonder if tonight's host can even afford this." Su Zongzhu thought silently.

"Thank you so much! But could you give me more at once? Maybe a hundred bottles?" The boy had just poured the immortal wine into his jade cup when several others gathered around him.

"A hundred bottles?! Su Zongzhu, as Enforcement Elder, can't I have five more? We haven't received our offerings in ages—you've already given him six!" Ye Fan tugged at Su Zongzhu's sleeve.

"Zhong Li, over here—Financial and Internal Affairs Elder, calculate our salaries." Ke Lian asked, as a Spirit Worm plopped off his face with a *pam*.

The boy's eyes widened in disbelief—he saw the man pick up the transparent worm from the ground and stuff it back onto his face.

"Han Li dares to ask as well—Su Zongzhu, please issue a few more bottles of Zui Xian Niang." Under the influence of the wine, Han Li joined the others in demanding his pay.

Zhong Li thought for a moment, then shook his head. "We never signed any contract for offerings or salaries."

"Burp!" Lu Mingfei belched. "Suggest labor arbitration."

The boy turned to Xiao Yan beside him. "Are you all from the same sect?"

"Yeah, Tianyi Sect," Xiao Yan nodded drunkenly. "Though I think Wujin Huoyu sounds better."

The others chattered on, and half-drunk Su Zongzhu finally understood what they wanted—but then he suddenly remembered something.

"Aren't *I* the one hosting tonight?"

A chill spread through him. Su Zongzhu shuddered, then immediately used his Eternal Furnace Core to forcibly absorb and convert the unabsorbed immortal energy, mixing in Order and Chaos seasonings before distributing it to his Jin Dan and Nascent Soul—his eyes regained a sliver of clarity.

"What the hell! Who just said a hundred bottles?!"

Su Zongzhu shoved the crowd aside and saw the slender, handsome boy beside Xiao Yan—still sipping Zui Xian Niang, clinking cups with Xiao Yan.

He blinked, his foggy mind struggling to recall—he didn't remember seeing this person during the toasts.

Someone this striking wouldn't go unnoticed.

"You drink this much…" Su Zongzhu asked. "Brother, who brought you as a guest?"

"I'm not anyone's guest," the boy smiled apologetically. "Hello, I'm Shi Hao. I accidentally entered this place from the Void God Realm. Thank you all for the hospitality."

He had merely entered the Void God Realm, yet found himself in this strange place—where not only were there great demons, but even true dragons roamed.

He'd originally planned to observe, but then noticed the wine these people drank was thick with immortal energy.

His body was cursed with Zhe Xian Curse; the power in Zui Xian Niang could intermittently trigger the curse's energy—though little, it gave him a glimmer of hope. So he blended in as a guest, eating and drinking, since everyone here was drunk.

He estimated another hundred bottles or so might reduce the Zhe Xian Curse's power to its lowest.

As for Drunken Life and Dreaming Death, it slightly strengthens the body—but nowhere near the effect of Zui Xian Niang.

Should've been more subtle—taken it slow. Now I've accidentally revealed myself.

"Try to negotiate with him calmly."

Shi Hao smiled at Su Zongzhu, ready to negotiate, to see if he could trade something for the Zui Xian Niang—and also prepared for the man to fly into a rage upon realizing he'd been freeloading.

But the man's reaction was strange.

"Shi Hao?" Su Zongzhu rubbed his head. "Where'd you get that Hun Tian Di? You've watched too many simulation universe dramas—the filming's over. Everyone here uses stage names. Don't take it seriously."

"Uh…" Shi Hao had no idea what the man was talking about.

"You're Shi Hao? I'm Ye Fan!" Ye Fan raised his wine goblet, clinked it against Shi Hao's, and drank it down.

"Wait, no—I really am Ye Fan, hahaha."

"Shi Hao? Who's that?" Lu Mingfei scratched his brow. "Sounds familiar."

"Who else? The Beast Milk Tian Di!" Ye Fan laughed. "I love beast milk! I love beast milk the most! Brother, you like beast milk too?"

"Hey, Mr. Fengchu, don't mock him. By the way, how old were you when you stopped drinking beast milk?" Su Zongzhu chuckled.

Ye Fan pointed at himself. "I'm Fengchu?"

Zhang Chuanyan mumbled, "I think ten? I haven't finished reading The Perfect World—just heard about it."

"They say Shi Hao's naming skills rival Su Zongzhu's. Hey, buddy, are your naming skills just as bad?" Xiao Yan grinned. "Big Red, Second Bald, burp!"

Shi Hao's face darkened. He kept drinking, forcing himself not to strike, forgetting even to use the immortal energy to dull the Zhe Xian Curse.

"Aowu! The Dragon Elder loves beast milk!" The Purple Gold Divine Dragon suddenly sang, "Ruling the Wilds, yelling 'I'll eat it all—I love beast milk, I love beast milk, aowu!'"

This was the final straw. Though he'd intended to use the wine's immortal energy, much of the alcohol's power still lingered unused.

"Beat them! Especially that guy named Ye Fan!" A voice echoed in his mind.

"Speaking of Shi Hao," Ye Fan turned to Su Zongzhu. "Was that song earlier his? You didn't summon him with a song, did you, hahaha?"

Su Zongzhu laughed at first, then his smile froze. As his mind cleared, he slowly opened his eyes.

At that moment, the boy before them unleashed a beastlike aura.

"Fight. I win, you sell me the wine." Shi Hao clenched his fists and grinned at them. "I stopped drinking beast milk at eight."

(End of Chapter)