Chapter 33: The Three Realms' storyteller ought to be replaced

In hiding?

Bodhi seemed to have heard a huge joke.

He made a casual gesture.

A rattan chair condensed in the void.

He lay back comfortably, crossed his legs, conjured a pot of tea, and took a sip.

The sequence flowed smoothly, making Sun Wukong below swallow his saliva.

That's too carefree.

I'll definitely have to learn that.

Old Hong!

Bodhi called out affectionately, like calling the second elder at the village entrance.

Don't flatter yourself.

Back then I merely slept in the Chaos Realm.

Upon waking.

My home is gone.

It was split open by that big oaf Pangu.

Bodhi pointed at the surrounding Heaven and Earth, wearing a look of disdain.

Everywhere is filled with foul miasma.

There's not even a quiet place to sleep.

I just want to find a corner to continue sleeping.

So what happened?

You lot are constantly scheming this and that.

Today is the calamity of measure, tomorrow is the calamity of slaughter.

The noise makes my head ache.

Hongjun's mouth twitched.

So, in your eyes, this Primordial Calamity is just a noise disturbance?

This reason...

It's truly fresh and unconventional.

So then?

Hongjun asked, suppressing his anger.

Therefore.

Bodhi set down the teapot.

The smile on his face faded somewhat.

That terrifying sense of oppression once again enveloped this space.

Since you can't manage this home.

Then let someone else take charge.

Hongjun furrowed his brows.

Do you want to take my place?

Me?

Bodhi snorted with laughter.

I can't be bothered with these trivial matters.

He reached out his hand.

He pointed to the monkey wielding a staff on the ruins of Gao Lao Village below.

Him.

I want him to be the lord of the Three Realms.

Upon saying that.

The Three Realms trembled.

In Gao Lao Village.

Zhu Bajie lay on the ground, the grass stalk in his mouth falling out.

Although he couldn't understand what the celestials above were saying, he instinctively felt fear.

That monkey... wants to be the lord of the Three Realms?

Then Marshal Tianpeng would have no chance, right?

Sun Wukong also froze for a moment.

He looked toward his Master.

In his golden eyes, two flames ignited.

Lord of the Three Realms?

Never mind that.

As long as the Master says it's okay, then it's okay.

Anyway, he's long wanted to sit in the Jade Emperor's throne.

Not allowed.

Hongjun refused without even thinking.

He is a demon.

When the demon race dominates Heaven, disaster will surely arise.

Moreover, the Heavenly Emperor is ordained by Heaven…

Heaven‑ordained? Bullshit.

Bodhi cut him off.

That useless Jade Emperor is the reincarnation of your boy disciple Haotian, right?

That's just a privileged connection.

What?

You only allow your own people to rise, but forbid my disciple from having a home?

Bodhi stood up.

The teapot in his hand turned into fine powder.

I'm not negotiating with you.

I'm informing you.

You may disagree.

Then I'll smash the Heavenly Court, level Ling Shan, and even go to Zi Xiao Gong to burn that broken mat of yours.

When the time comes.

Whether no one governs the Three Realms or the monkey does.

The outcome is the same.

A naked threat.

Hongjun's complexion shifted from pale green to white.

He knows.

Bodhi can do it.

This guy is a lunatic.

A lunatic with absolute power.

If they truly clash…

The consequences would be unimaginable.

You…

Hongjun took a deep breath.

Weighing.

Calculating.

Compromising.

As the spokesperson of the Heavenly Dao, his specialty is handling multiple‑choice questions.

As long as the Primordial Chaos remains intact and the Heavenly Dao does not collapse.

Replacing the Heavenly Emperor doesn't seem unacceptable.

In any case, if the great trend stays the same, the minor trend can be reversed.

First, secure this lunatic.

Fine.

After a long while.

Hongjun nodded.

His voice carried deep helplessness.

But he must not act recklessly.

He must not destroy the foundations of Primordial Chaos.

Cannot…

Enough, enough.

Bodhi waved his hand.

As if shooing flies.

Don't give so much nonsense.

My disciple is far stronger than your boy disciple.

Just don't stir trouble and don't set traps for him.

These Three Realms cannot be thrown into chaos.

Hongjun gave Bodhi a deep look.

Then he glanced at Sun Wukong below.

His gaze was profound.

As if trying to see through the monkey's future.

But what he saw.

Only a swath of Chaos.

It was the "firewall" Bodhi placed on the monkey.

Even the Heavenly Dao cannot peer into it.

Variable…

Hongjun murmured softly.

These two words contained all his worries and helplessness.

"If that's the case."

"Then I, the poor Daoist, will not interfere any further."

Hongjun lightly tapped the bamboo staff in his hand.

The purple qi filling the sky began to dissipate.

That eye of heavenly punishment also slowly closed.

He was going back to the Zi Xiao Gong.

He had already lost enough face today.

Staying longer would only bring him further shame.

"Wait."

Just as Hongjun's figure was about to disappear.

Bodhi suddenly called out to stop him.

Hongjun's figure paused.

He turned around warily.

"What else is there?"

"It's nothing major."

Bodhi pointed outside Gao Lao Village.

There lay a large fat pig trembling all over.

"I remember."

"This pig seems to be of the same generation as your disciple, right?"

"A registered disciple of the Human Sect?"

Hongjun furrowed his brows.

He did not deny it.

Although Marshal Tianpeng was merely a minor figure, he indeed counted as a lineage of the Human Sect.

"My disciple just Fèi le him."

Bodhi said, smiling with narrowed eyes.

"Go tell that old geezer Taishang a word."

"Don't think about giving him special treatment to restore his Xiūwéi."

"This pig is quite good."

"From now on, let him be a breeding pig here at Gao Lao Village, which will also benefit the people."

Hongjun's mouth corner twitched.

The venerable Marshal Tianpeng.

"To be a breeding pig?"

"To benefit the people?"

"Is this even human speech?"

He dared not retort.

Bodhi now is nothing but a powder keg.

Whoever lights it, gets blown up.

"Understood."

Hongjun coldly threw down three words.

His figure completely vanished into the void.

Along with that oppressive, breath‑stealing aura, it also dissipated.

The sky returned to blue.

Sunlight poured down.

Everything seemed like a dream.

Except for the collapsed wall of Gao Lao Village and the pig Zhu Bajie still eating grass on the ground.

"Master!"

Seeing the old Daoist depart.

Sun Wukong leapt up with a somersault.

He landed in front of Bodhi.

His face full of excitement.

"What you just said is true?"

"Really letting me be the ruler of the Three Realms?"

Bodhi glanced at this fidgety disciple.

He raised his hand and flicked his disciple's forehead.

Thud.

It was loud.

But he didn't use much force.

"How come?"

"You don't want to?"

"If you find it troublesome, then let that pig take it."

"No, no, no!"

Sun Wukong covers his head and laughs heartily.

"Take it!"

"Definitely take it!"

"I've long found that Zhang Bainren displeasing."

"When I sit up there, I'll first tear down that Lingxiao Hall and replace it with a Mount Huaguo style."

"Then change all those immortals' salaries to peaches."

Bodhi shakes his head helplessly.

This monkey.

Still this kind of conduct.

However.

This is also fine.

This dead‑weight Three Realms truly needs such an unrestrained fellow to stir up the murky waters.

"Let's go."

Bodhi stands with his hands behind his back.

Takes a step forward.

Walks toward the direction of the Heavenly Court.

"Since you said you want to rise in rank."

"Then you have to go sit in that position."

"By the way."

"And while you're at it."

"Deal with those who are still Unyielding."

"Clean them up."

【204】 Sun Wukong lifts the Golden Cudgel.

Follows closely behind.

Nezha, clutching his fire spear, skips along at the very end.

Three figures.

Facing the sunlight.

Walk toward the pinnacle that represents the highest authority of the Three Realms.

In Gao Lao Zhuang.

The Seven Fairies still stand at the edge of that big pit.

Watching the three departing silhouettes.

The Purple‑clothed Fairy's legs feel a bit weak.

She leans against the Red‑clothed Fairy.

Her gaze is somewhat hazy.

The figure that just blocked her, swinging a cudgel that sent the Heavenly Dao flying back…

So domineering.

Compared to that father emperor who only sits on the Dragon Throne issuing orders…

Much stronger.

Her face is a bit flushed.

Not sure if it's from the sun.

Or if she thought of something she shouldn't.

And at this moment, the Heavenly Court.

Has long been a chaotic mess.

The news of the Dao Ancestor's defeat spread instantly through the powerful onlookers across the Thirty‑three Heavens.

The Jade Emperor sits amid the ruins.

Holding in his hand a fragment of the Haotian Mirror.

His eyes are vacant.

He mutters continuously, "It's over… completely over…"

The Queen Mother crawls out from under the table.

Her hairpin is crooked.

Her makeup is smudged.

Where is any trace of the Motherly Dignity that once commanded the world?

She watches those immortals who are tidying up and preparing to flee.

She shrieks, "Everyone, stop!"

"Who dares to run!"

"I'll chop off his head!"

No one pays her any attention.

Even the few most obedient fairy maidens, who usually obey, secretly slip the remaining few leaves from the Peach Garden into their bosoms, preparing to descend to the mortal realm.

When disaster strikes, each flies away.

This is reality.

And in this chaotic world.

A new order.

At the feet of that white‑robed Dàorén and that golden‑haired monkey.

Slowly being born.