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Chapter 2: Did I Wake Up Too Suddenly?

~17 min read 3,292 words

Chen Yan was shuffling the tiles.

Yes, that's right, he sat at the table.

Just after arriving home, Old Grandma had no mind to attend to him, so Chen Yan could only move a small stool and sit beside her.

Just watching wasn't enough!

When Old Grandma went to the toilet in the middle, Chen Yan even had to take a seat at the table and play a round for her!

Looking at the tiles lined up in a row before him...

One bamboo, one bamboo / five-six-seven of characters / two characters, two characters, two characters / four-five-seven of dots...

Chen Yan suddenly felt a bit dazed.

Wait, what did I come back here to do?!!

I've been grieving and sorrowful for several hours on this journey!

Two and a half hours on the high-speed rail, one hour on the long-distance bus, plus walking three li!

I almost cried before I even stepped through the door, you know, Old Grandma?!

Huh? This hand isn't bad.

Discard the seven of dots, wait for the three and six of dots...

Wait, what am I doing!

My emotions aren't even coherent anymore!

Chen Yan felt his mind was getting a bit chaotic.

He turned his head, and Old Grandma was sitting on the stool beside him, holding a washed cucumber in her hand and gnawing on it.

Glancing at Chen Yan, Old Grandma snapped the cucumber in her hand into two pieces with a crack, and handed him half.

"Want some?"

"..."

·

Around five in the evening, after today's eight rounds were finished, the old regular partners took their leave one by one.

After seeing off neighbor Grandma Zhang and Old Uncle Xu the Lame, the last to leave was Uncle Niu, who ran the small grocery store.

Before Uncle Niu left, Old Grandma actually called him back.

"Old Niu."

"What's up?" Uncle Niu had lost ten or eight yuan today and was in a bad mood: "The money wasn't counted wrong! I didn't give less!"

Old Grandma smiled, looked carefully at Old Niu, sighed lightly, and waved her hand: "Never mind, I calculated the events that will happen in your family in the future. I originally wanted to give you two words of advice... but by the time those things happen, you'll be long gone.

No need to say more, no need to say more, it only adds trouble."

Old Niu's head froze for a moment—wait, is that a good thing?

But Uncle Niu and Old Grandma were familiar; knowing that Old Grandma usually spouted strange talk, he immediately laughed and scolded: "You're just teasing me again? I'm going to the county tomorrow morning to see my grandson, and we'll play cards next week."

Old Grandma squinted and smiled, said nothing, and saw Old Niu off.

The grandfather and grandson could finally face off 1v1.

After staring at each other with wide eyes for a while, Chen Yan couldn't hold it in first.

"Old Grandma, you won the money Old Niu used to buy meat again, right? The Niu family will have to eat vegetarian for the next couple of days," Chen Yan muttered cautiously.

"No problem. Old Niu has high blood lipids; eating less meat is good for him."

Old Grandma, with her smiling appearance radiating such kindness, turned and went into the kitchen first, pulling out a bowl of cold jelly noodles from the cupboard.

"Made from mung bean starch. Knowing you were coming back, I had someone deliver it this afternoon. The sesame oil is in the cabinet; get it yourself."

Wait!! The words haven't been clarified yet, why eat cold jelly noodles?

Chen Yan looked at that bowl of cold jelly noodles and angrily drooled.

Chen Yan steadied his mindset, took a deep breath, and stared at Old Grandma.

"The old village head called me."

"Hmm. What's up? Is he sponsoring a stand-up comedy variety show?"

Whoa~~! (In the tone of Boss Guo again)

Old Grandma, you're quite something; it seems the Penguin membership I recharged for you has been in use all along?

Old Grandma took a puff of smoke with a click, walked over and closed the main door of the hall, while Chen Yan followed closely, pressing for answers.

"The old village head said you fainted yesterday morning and went to the hospital?"

"Hmm, that's right, I went and came back," Old Grandma said lightly.

"What does that mean?"

"Went to check, the hospital found nothing wrong, so I came back," Old Grandma said with calm indifference.

Chen Yan was stunned for a moment: "Then how did you faint? Heatstroke? That can't be right; it's this season, and in a few more days it'll be snowing."

Old Grandma didn't reply, walked straight back to the table, looked at the cold jelly noodles on the table, picked up her chopsticks and took a bite herself, smacked her lips, and looked at Chen Yan sideways: "The taste is quite good, are you really not eating?"

Chen Yan grabbed his hair hard, feeling a bit irritated: "Grandma! Ancestor! What exactly is wrong with you? Is there something wrong or not?"

"Ah, nothing major," Old Grandma said while eating the cold jelly noodles, smacking her lips with an air of nonchalance: "But speaking of which, it is indeed time to call you back."

Chen Yan helplessly smiled bitterly: "Go ahead and say it."

Old Grandma put down her chopsticks and looked at Chen Yan with a smile.

"That... if I say I'm about to die, do you believe me?"

Chen Yan: o_o....

·

Two seconds later.

"What?"

Chen Yan jumped three feet high.

The Old Grandma waved her hand good-naturedly, her emotions stable and her attitude kind: "Don't jump yet.

This is just how things are. I've calculated it; there's still one day left."

Chen Yan panicked!

"Stop messing around, will you? My ancestor!" As he spoke, he moved to grab the Old Grandma's arm: "Let's go!! I'll take you to the hospital! Right now!"

"Alright, I already told you the hospital found nothing. Why go to the hospital?" The Old Grandma casually flicked her hand, brushing Chen Yan's hand away, and leisurely took a puff of smoke... The Old Grandma was indeed calm and indifferent, even performing a small 'returning dragon' maneuver.

Hmm, that kind where you take a puff into your mouth, don't inhale it into your windpipe, but directly blow the smoke out of your mouth and then suck it back in through your nose.

With that little trick, unless you've smoked for less than ten years, you couldn't possibly practice it without getting bronchitis seven or eight times.

·

The Old Grandma chuckled softly, saying: "No need for the hospital. I calculated it myself; this is called the approaching end of my life!

It's destined by fate. Your grandmother here, I still have..."

As she spoke, she glanced at the clock on the wall... Hmm? The wall clock wasn't moving; the battery hadn't been replaced and it stopped long ago.

The Old Grandma casually grabbed Chen Yan's mobile phone from the table and glanced at the time on the screen.

"... I still have eighteen hours and forty-three minutes of life left."

Wait, hold on!

How did you calculate that time?

Chen Yan was dumbfounded.

Probably because the Old Grandma was usually so mystical and pretentious, used to playing tricks and fooling Chen Yan far too many times.

Hearing these words now, Chen Yan's first reaction was actually not sadness.

But rather...

Calculating life span? Damn, can it be calculated this accurately?

Down to the minute?!

·

It wasn't really that Chen Yan had a big heart; it was simply that he had experienced the Old Grandma speaking nonsense like this so often from childhood to adulthood.

Hmm, remember, your biological mother was a transformed white fox.

However, hearing the Old Grandma talk such utter nonsense, Chen Yan's heart actually gradually settled down.

He roughly judged that—this time, just like the countless pranks he had experienced from childhood to adulthood, the Old Grandma was just playing tricks on him.

Have you ever seen a grandmother trick her eight-year-old grandson into thinking that to learn the Divine Art of the Fiery Cloud Evil God, he had to eat a spoonful of stir-fried bird's-eye chilies every day?

That summer, Chen Yan's buttocks hurt for two weeks!

What a sensation!

As for the dark history of him watching TV, wanting to learn the Heaven-Disabling Kick, and then being tricked by the Old Grandma into walking barefoot on cow dung, just thinking about it now makes Chen Yan shed tears...

Anyway! Over time, Chen Yan knew the Old Grandma's character all too well.

Various pranks, various boundary-less and limit-less jokes were an indispensable spice in the twenty years of life between the grandmother and grandson.

Fine, Old Grandma, you love to act, do you?

Act then!

Chen Yan suddenly wasn't anxious anymore; he went straight to the kitchen, grabbed a pair of chopsticks, and began to focus on attacking the bowl of cold jelly noodles in front of him.

Watching Chen Yan eat the cold jelly noodles, the Old Grandma smiled with a kind and benevolent expression.

"By the way, my burial clothes are ready too. In a while, I still have to try them on. If they don't fit, there's still time to alter them. While it's not dark yet, I'll go knock on the tailor Liu's door."

Just as Chen Yan finished the cold jelly noodles, the Old Grandma suddenly dropped this line out of nowhere.

"... Fine, fine." Chen Yan helplessly rolled his Bai Yan. Old Grandma, are you addicted to playing games?

·

Midnight, lying on the bed in his small room, Chen Yan actually tossed and turned, feeling a bit uneasy in his heart.

But then, listening to the earth-shaking snoring of the Old Grandma in the next room, like a mountain collapsing and a sea surging, full of vital energy!

With that lung capacity! With that spirit?

I, with my sub-healthy physique after living in the city for a few years, if I don't quit strictness, alcohol, and masturbation, maybe she'll be the one to send me off!

Chen Yan felt a bit more at ease, turned over, and finally fell asleep.

·

Yesterday's journey had been too tiring; Chen Yan didn't get up until nearly noon the next day. He put on his clothes but hadn't even brushed his teeth yet when the Old Grandma sent him to the village entrance to buy soy sauce.

Chen Yan walked to the village entrance yawning, when suddenly he saw a black sedan roar past him.

Oh? A big Mercedes.

Eh, wait, not a big Mercedes.

This is a Maybach.

After all, having attended university for a few years in a big city like Jin Ling, Chen Yan had seen a bit of the world.

Could it be that some wealthy investor has come to the village?

Chen Yan slapped his face and looked back a few times, only to find that after the Maybach drove more than ten meters, it slammed on the brakes and stopped, then quickly reversed back to Chen Yan's side before stopping again.

The window rolled down, revealing a rugged, burly face inside, covered in flesh, who asked in a rough voice:

"Are you Chen Yan?"

Chen Yan was stunned.

But looking at the other person's burly face, he didn't look like a good sort!

Chen Yan paused, then shook his head calmly: "No."

"Oh… then how do I get to Chen Yan's house?"

Chen Yan smiled calmly and pointed in the opposite direction: "About five hundred meters that way, cross the river, then turn right."

"Thanks."

The Maybach started and drove off; Chen Yan immediately turned and ran toward the village security chief's house—the chief's two sons were both police officers.

He also kept two big dogs at home, terrifyingly fierce.

Unfortunately, a few seconds later, the Maybach came back.

It made a sharp turn and stopped directly in front of Chen Yan; two burly men in black stepped out and headed straight for him.

"You liar! We've seen your photo—you're Chen Yan!"

Chen Yan struggled but couldn't break free; he panicked.

"No!"

Either you don't react at all, or you react too late!

Having just enough intelligence to be annoying is really hard to deal with!

·

Without another word, the two men dragged Chen Yan into the car, shoved him into the back seat, and flanked him on either side.

The Maybach drove off.

Inside the car, Chen Yan cautiously sized them up.

The driver in front, the passenger beside him, and the two burly men beside him.

Four men total, all dressed in black suits, radiating brute strength.

Heavy facial features, buzz cuts—put them in Da Hengdian Country as extras, and they wouldn't need makeup to play gangsters or fugitives.

Chen Yan forced a smile.

"Uh, big brothers, what can I do for you?"

No answer.

As the car left the village, Chen Yan hesitated, then ventured softly: "Big brother, I'm kidney-deficient, my kidneys aren't worth anything… uh, I've got fatty liver too, my liver's worthless too…"

The brute on the left finally couldn't hold back.

"Don't talk nonsense—we don't want your organs."

The black-clad man in the front passenger seat, apparently the leader, turned and glanced at Chen Yan: "Don't be afraid. We're not bad people. Our boss wants to meet you."

Boss?

What boss?

…

The Maybach left the village and, after more than ten minutes, entered the nearby town.

The town's best hotel was called 【Da Dongfang Grand Hotel】.

Hmm, two 【Da】 characters—clearly showing the boss's shallow cultural background.

The name was grand, but it was only two stories tall.

The car stopped at the back lot of the hotel; Chen Yan was dragged out by the two men and escorted all the way to the top floor.

The door at the end of the hallway opened; one of the black-clad men beside Chen Yan gestured for him to enter.

Chen Yan rolled his eyes.

Though nervous, he knew clearly: his family's savings weren't enough to warrant murder for money.

Besides, curiosity had taken over at this moment.

He walked through the door.

Then he saw a thin, small old man with an alien-like face sitting on a sofa, smiling warmly at him.

Holy shit, that face is so familiar!

Looking at that face, so iconic and unmistakably alien-like…

The words "Boss!" nearly burst from his lips!

Chen Yan rubbed his eyes hard.

Holy shit!

It's real!

I'm seeing the real person!!

The middle-aged man stood up and extended his hand with a smile.

"Mr. Chen Yan, hello, I'm Ma…"

"I know, I know, I know! Ma Dad… no, Boss Ma! Who doesn't know you?!"

Chen Yan was a bit bewildered.

Boss Ma looked at Chen Yan with a beaming smile: "Come, let's sit and chat. I've never been here before, so I don't know local customs—I had them prepare a few things casually."

On the dining table in the room were several local specialty dishes.

And right in the center, the two bottles of state banquet-grade Maotai instantly caught Chen Yan's eye.

"Can you drink? Let's have a couple of glasses." Boss Ma waved his hand grandly, tilting his head: "Cancel my afternoon appointments—I'll get thoroughly drunk with Mr. Chen Yan."

Chen Yan froze, then noticed, in the corner beside the sofa, another man—a plain-looking middle-aged man, likely Boss Ma's trusted aide. After receiving Boss Ma's instruction, he nodded, pulled out his phone, sent a few messages, then stood quietly in the room.

Chen Yan was pushed to the table and seated.

"How old are you this year, Mr. Chen Yan?"

"Twenty-two."

"Young and promising! Where are you working now?"

"Uh..." Chen Yan felt a bit conflicted, then stammered, "Well... actually, I was originally interning in the planning department of a subsidiary ground-promotion advertising company under an Ali-affiliated firm in Jin Ling Prefecture."

"Oh? You're from our Ali-affiliated group? A local subsidiary ground-promotion advertising company, planning department?" A glint flashed in Boss Ma's eyes, mixed with a hint of secret delight.

"Uh, I'm not anymore..." Chen Yan felt a bit awkward—Boss Ma, I really didn't mean to slap your face...

"Why?" Old Ma suddenly looked disappointed.

"Because... hey, never mind, let's not talk about it." Chen Yan wasn't the kind of petty person who loved to tattle whenever he got the chance: "I just didn't get along with the department manager. Nothing worth mentioning. It's the workplace, after all."

Boss Ma let out a long "Oh," then suddenly tilted his head: "Check who the person in charge is at that advertising company under the Jin Ling Prefecture branch, and also who heads the planning department there."

"Sure." The middle-aged man, who had been virtually invisible, nodded and was about to pick up his phone.

Boss Ma suddenly shook his head, waved his hand with a smile, and said, "Never mind, no need to check."

Before Chen Yan could even react, Boss Ma casually added another sentence.

"Fire them all."

All!

Fire!

Them!

All!

In an instant, Chen Yan finally came to! Suddenly, a jolt ran through him!

Suddenly, an absurd and unimaginable thought flashed through his mind.

Wait a minute!

Wait a minute!!

Didn't Old Grandma always say she picked me up?

This Boss Ma, could he not be... could he not be...

But then Chen Yan immediately dismissed this ridiculous speculation.

Look at my face! My looks! My height!

Look at Boss Ma's alien face, that tiny frame...

He couldn't possibly have a son as good as me!

"Um, President Ma." Chen Yan finally steadied himself now, took a deep breath: "I don't know why you sent someone to bring me here... um, I don't even know how to say it. I'm just a small fry... I hadn't even brushed my teeth this morning when my Old Grandma called me out to buy something. You see... I'm honestly a bit bewildered right now."

Boss Ma's eyes suddenly narrowed.

He picked up his chopsticks, grabbed a bite of cold shredded cucumber, put it in his mouth, acted as if he didn't care at all, and asked a question.

"Is your Old Grandma doing well?"

"Huh?"

Old Grandma?

Does Boss Ma know our family's old shaman?!

Chen Yan took a deep breath, his heart pounding like a drum.

"You... know our family sha... um, my grandmother?"

"I do!"

Boss Ma's answer was very straightforward. Then, his voice was not loud, but firm as he said, "Back then, your grandmother helped me once."

Chen Yan was a bit at a loss.

Helped you once? With our family's superstitious Old Grandma, what could she possibly help you with?

Perform rituals to call back your soul? Or did she force talisman water down your throat when you were sick?

"Many years ago, I hit a rough patch. Through an introduction, I found the elder to have her calculate my fortune once. That time, the help she gave me was very great." Boss Ma suddenly felt a bit emotional and couldn't help adding, "Huge."

Wait a minute!

Wait a minute, okay!

Chen Yan rolled his eyes.

Our family Old Grandma's business has even expanded to the Forbes list!

No...

What kind of situation is this!

Did I wake up too abruptly today?

Or was my waking-up posture wrong?

·

(Starting tomorrow, the new book will have two updates a day!

Favorites + Recommendations, let's have a wave~~~~)

·

【Serious Statement: The story in this book is purely fictional, set in a fictional alternate world. All characters or events appearing in the story are fictional, do not involve reality, and are completely unrelated to the real world!

(Serious face)】

·

◈

End of Chapter

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