Chapter 313: The Fat Actor

"I see my love off to the Five-Li Mound, then walk another five li to make it a full stage…"

A woman in a long skirt, clutching the hem of her garment, sang loudly on stage in a drawn-out, lilting voice — her tone piercingly bright, carrying a raw, unpolished beauty. Below the stage sat Chen Xin, Huang Side, Yang Yunnong, and others, much like judges at a talent show, except there was no button in front of them.

Chen Xin had come today to inspect the Laiyang training base — this was already his second visit here. Huang Side happened to be here checking on the work of the cultural troupe; Yang Yunnong, from the Foreign Affairs Department, was responsible for dealing with the Dengzhou-Laizhou guard battalions. Relying on Dengzhou Garrison's overwhelming power, he had gone to Aoshan Guard and used a mix of threats and inducements, forcing the Seal-holding Guard Commander to agree to let military households enlist and to give up some embezzled farmland. This batch of soldiers had been recruited from Aoshan Guard, and he had delivered them to the training base for selection. The three had come together, and Huang Side invited them to help guide the cultural troupe's play. The three sat below the stage, watching with rapt attention.

"I meant to see my love off for thirty li, but my shoes are tight, my stockings small, each step so hard to take…"

"Cut!" A loud shout rang out. Huang Side turned his head in surprise. The two cultural troupe members singing on stage also stopped. Everyone stared at Chen Xin, sitting in the front row, not understanding what this "cut" was supposed to mean.

Chen Xin stood up, jumped onto the platform, walked up to the actress, and said, "You sang very well, and very loudly, but when you sing, you have to look at the audience. You need to connect with them. Connecting means making every single person feel like you're singing to them. That's how you create immersion. Understand?"

The female soldier nodded blankly. Just as Chen Xin breathed a sigh of relief, he heard the female soldier say, "Don't understand."

Huang Side said angrily from below the stage, "Then why did you nod if you don't understand?"

Afraid he might frighten the female soldier, Chen Xin waved a hand at Huang Side and went to stand beside her himself. He struck a pose. "'I see my love off to the Five-Li Mound.' Here, don't clutch the hem of your clothes like that — your clothes haven't done you any wrong. You need to look at the lover across from you. You're here to see him off; you need to have that feeling of being unable to let go."

The female soldier asked timidly, "What does 'unable to let go' mean?"

Chen Xin was starting to sweat a little. "What's your name? Have you never seen anyone off?"

"My name is Guan Xiaomei. I've only ever seen my elder brother off. I didn't even see my younger brother off — he went to study, all smug and pleased with himself, so I wasn't willing to see him off. My elder brother left last year and still hasn't come back. He ran off to Lushun to fight the Tatars."

"Then you have seen someone off, that's right." Chen Xin clapped his hands. "So how did you see him off back then?"

"I wrapped my elder brother's leggings for him, and bought him some tobacco."

"Tobacco? Right." Chen Xin decided to add a bit of product placement. He said to Huang Side, "Add a scene about buying tobacco. The shopkeeper's voice needs to be loud, and he absolutely must say the words 'Wendeng Aroma.'"

Huang Side clicked his tongue in admiration. "My lord, you even know how to direct a play — truly, a capable man can do anything. But this play is set in the Tianqi era, and Wendeng Aroma didn't exist back then."

"Never mind all that." Chen Xin chuckled. Who was going to research the timeline anyway? There were no textual purists here.

He sized up Guan Xiaomei in front of him again. Her skin was a little dark, but she was very fresh and pretty — exactly the right kind of actor for commoner roles. He said to her, "Guan Xiaomei, when you act, just treat your partner as if he were your elder brother. Change the clothes — wear what ordinary settlement households wear every day. Don't go for those gaudy, flashy costumes. Also, you need to change your name to something that sounds better. Use this as your stage name."

Yang Yunnong chimed in from below the stage, "This troupe member is so fresh and pretty. How about calling her Peipei?"

Chen Xin didn't quite follow Yang Yunnong's logic — the name he picked was on par with Mengmeng from Red Cliff — but it was good enough for a stage name. Giving Yang Yunnong face, Chen Xin settled on the stage name Guan Peipei for the actress, then jumped off the platform and shouted, "Lovers in Troubled Times, Scene One, begin!"

Guan Xiaomei imitated Chen Xin's manner. In her heart, she thought about the feeling of seeing her brothers off. The scene of her eldest and second brothers leaving home appeared before her eyes — especially the second brother, who had never returned, and the eldest, now in the most dangerous part of Liaodong. Tears immediately welled up in her eyes. Chen Xin, below the stage, was completely focused. He raised both hands slightly and said softly, "Good, good. Now look at the audience — yes, that's it — then turn back to look at your partner, and start singing."

"I see my love off to the Five-Li Mound, then walk another five li to make it a full stage…" Guan Xiaomei sang out loudly. Infused with emotion, it felt completely different from the beginning. Huang Side couldn't help but click his tongue in wonder.

Chen Xin listened with great satisfaction. After Guan Xiaomei finished singing, it was the male actor's spoken line. The male actor had clear enunciation and a very handsome appearance. When Guan Xiaomei looked at him, her eyes sparkled, truly carrying a hint of looking at a lover. Chen Xin whispered to Huang Side, "Is this real or acting?"

The male actor then said loudly, "Xiaoxiao, you needn't see me off any further. Your brother is only going away for two or three days. I'll go to Fenghuang City, buy some grain, and bring you back rouge and red hair ribbons. I'll buy your mother some needles, thread, and salted meat, so she'll agree to our marriage sooner."

"Cut!" Both actors looked toward the audience again. This time, however, it was Huang Side who called cut. He had picked up Chen Xin's style with lightning speed.

Huang Side stood below the stage and said, "Xu Pingjie, Lord Chen just said it — interact more with the audience below the stage. Do you understand 'interact'? When you deliver your spoken lines, you also need to sweep your gaze across the audience once. Were you not listening?"

Xu Pingjie had no choice but to do it over. Huang Side kept correcting him. Normally, in the army, Huang Side often had to put on official airs, but now, returning to his old trade in the entertainment world, he threw all concern for his image aside, gesticulating wildly and occasionally demonstrating in person for the actor, passing on his performance experience. Yang Yunnong, knowing the Chief Training Officer's standing within the Dengzhou system, also came over to play along with Huang Side, helping to offer ideas and suggestions.

After they had made a fuss like this for quite a while, Huang Side finally stopped to drink water and rest. The rehearsal continued on stage. Chen Xin, Huang Side, and Yang Yunnong, their foreheads covered in sweat, found it a bit amusing. As they watched, Chen Xin asked Huang Side, "What other plot points come later?"

"The man in this play is called Yang Gang, and the woman is called Tang Xiaoxiao. Both are from Fenghuang City in Liaodong. The two pledged themselves to each other in secret, but unfortunately, the woman's parents wouldn't agree. Today, Yang Gang has harvested his grain and goes into the city to sell it and buy cosmetics. On the road, he learns the Jianzhou Bandits have come. Later, the Jianzhou Bandits arrive at their village. They want to seize Yang Gang to be a bondservant, and they also want to violate Tang Xiaoxiao."

"That's it?"

"This… please, my lord, give us your guidance."

"The way it is now, it doesn't show how hateful those Jianzhou Bandits are. The time you choose should be like this: Yang Gang figures that no matter who comes, he'll still have to pay taxes, so he doesn't resist the Jianzhou Bandits. Then he comes back from selling his grain, buys a gift for Tang Xiaoxiao's mother, and her mother agrees to the marriage. But on the wedding night, the Jianzhou Bandits come, snatch Tang Xiaoxiao away, and force Yang Gang's family to hand over grain to buy their lives. Yang Gang's family has six members, but only enough grain to save one. They choose four people to go to their deaths. Yang Gang rises up to fight back, rescues Tang Xiaoxiao, and flees to my Wendeng Battalion, vowing to drive the Jianzhou Bandits out of Liaodong."

Huang Side licked his lips, his mind racing. "My lord, your concept is profound. There is just one point — your subordinate has a small suggestion. Tang Xiaoxiao should die. Just as Yang Gang goes to rescue her, he sees her resisting and being killed. This way, Tang Xiaoxiao preserves her chastity, which makes her even more pitiable. Pity leads to hatred. And because Yang Gang did not resist the Jianzhou Bandits, his family and wife all die tragically — that will strike the heart even more. It will make everyone understand that resisting the Jianzhou Bandits to the death is also for their own sake. Yang Gang later flees to Wendeng — that is his awakening, his struggle against the Jianzhou Bandits' tyranny, which then highlights the value of righteousness."

Chen Xin stared at Huang Side in astonishment, then clapped his hands repeatedly in praise. This storyteller truly was from the entertainment world — he had a real gift for performance, to have such a deep study of scriptwriting. Chen Xin couldn't help but praise him: "Chief Training Officer Huang, you truly live up to your title as head of training. With these changes, it will surely become a classic, widely recited."

Huang Side, all smiles, bowed and said, "Your subordinate is unworthy of my lord's excessive praise. Just now, I was merely inspired by my lord. It is rather strange to say — whenever your subordinate feels his talent and ideas have run dry, just hearing a few words from my lord makes the ideas flow like a spring. To this humble one, my lord is like a guiding light in the darkness of night."

Chen Xin accepted all the flattery. Although he knew perfectly well that Huang Side was speaking empty, formulaic words, he still found them pleasant to hear. The two had been talking the whole time, and the rehearsal on stage had continued. Soon, the plot reached the wedding scene, and the bride began stepping over the fire basin and bowing to the parents.

Chen Xin whispered to Huang Side, "This part needs to be livelier. Find more people to play the relatives and friends. When she steps over the fire basin, have someone shout, 'May your days ahead be prosperous and fiery!' That way, when the Jianzhou Bandits destroy everything later, the contrast will stand out."

Before Huang Side could speak, a loud shout came from the stage: "What a beautiful Nikan woman! I, Huang Taiji, claim her! Hahaha!"

Chen Xin nearly choked on his own saliva. He hurriedly looked up and saw a tall, burly male actor stepping onto the stage. He wore a magua jacket, his head wrapped in white cloth with a long fake queue trailing behind, and a large blade slung over his shoulder.

The male actor bellowed, "I am the Jianzhou Bandits' Great Khan, Huang Taiji! Liaodong is now occupied by me! All the houses and grain here are mine! All the men and women are my household bondservants! Bondservants — that means clothes wrapping flesh…"

"Cut!" This time it was Chen Xin. He pulled Huang Side aside. "This actor is too handsome. We need to swap him for someone ugly."

Huang Side did not hesitate for a moment. The investor had spoken — how could the producer dare not change the supporting male actor? He immediately called over the cultural troupe's commanding officer and muttered with him for a while. The officer hurriedly summoned seven or eight male actors. Chen Xin looked them over one by one — all handsome young men. He shook his head.

Seeing that the leadership was not satisfied, Huang Side knew that even the smallest problem could absolutely not be treated as a trifle. He called over the team leader and gave him a thorough scolding: "How can you use such good-looking people to play these Jianzhou Bandits? And you came from an opera troupe, no less! Has any villainous minister or evil tyrant ever been good-looking? How do you recruit people? Can't you use your own head when doing things? Must you wait for Lord Chen to teach you everything? Lord Chen has countless matters to attend to every day — can you bear the responsibility for delaying him?"

The team leader's forehead was sweating. It was clearly Huang Side who had told him to find better-looking people, saying that the settlement households preferred to watch that. He had followed those instructions to the letter, and now, in the blink of an eye, it had become him not using his own head. In truth, Huang Side had simply forgotten Chen Xin's additional instruction and conveniently tossed the blame onto this team leader.

Chen Xin stopped Huang Side and said to the team leader, "The play is rehearsed quite well. It's just that this actor needs to be changed. This official dislikes nothing more than watching pretty-boy, pretty-girl Qing palace dramas. What if some young girls or young wives who don't know any better come and think the Tatars are all this handsome? Would they still support fighting the Tatars? Besides, the Tatars weren't good-looking to begin with."

Neither Huang Side nor the team leader knew what a "Qing palace drama" was, but they understood that Chen Xin did not like Tatars being portrayed as good-looking. The team leader said hurriedly, "This humble one will change him right away. It's just that I can't find one immediately. Give me a few days to search. It's just… to what degree of ugliness, I beg the two lords to give me some guidance."

Chen Xin and Huang Side's eyes darted around. Yang Yunnong, however, leaned in and said, "Naturally, the sort with crooked features and a repulsive face."

Huang Side shook his head. "A repulsive face can be seen clearly from the front rows, but those in the back, if they're too far away, might not see it clearly. If only…" Huang Side suddenly sized up Yang Yunnong's spherical figure. Yang Yunnong felt a chill under his gaze and suddenly realized what was happening. He stammered, "L-Lord Huang, this humble one cannot sing opera."

Huang Side ignored him and whispered to Chen Xin, "My lord, the settlement households all toil bitterly. Only the wealthy households have fat people. These refugees, in the end, resent the wealthy households. If we make the Jianzhou Bandits both evil and fat…"

Yang Yunnong waved both hands frantically. "Lord Huang, that won't do! This humble one is only here to deliver the new recruits. This… this humble one would rather die ten thousand deaths than dare to go act in a play."

Chen Xin laughed heartily and patted Yang Yunnong on the shoulder. Yang Yunnong was an official of the Foreign Affairs Department. In this era, actors had very low social status, so naturally, Chen Xin wouldn't actually make Yang Yunnong go act. He merely consoled him, "You won't even take the male lead — what a pity. But you're an official of the Foreign Affairs Department; it wouldn't be appropriate for you to go sing opera."

Yang Yunnong breathed a sigh of relief. The cultural troupe's team leader said worriedly, "My lord, it's truly not easy to find fat people among our settlement households. Ugly ones, though, are plentiful."

Chen Xin pointed toward the drill field. "Isn't there a fat one right over there?"

Yang Yunnong turned his head to look. At the edge of the drill field stood a row of people of varying heights, curiously watching this side. Among them was a plump one. Having just escaped a disaster, Yang Yunnong quickly said, "My lord, those people are all recruits delivered by your subordinate. Most are military households from around Aoshan Guard. This row here are all the rejects who didn't pass the selection. They'd be perfect to pick for the cultural troupe."

Chen Xin waved a hand, and the group walked over together. The people rehearsing on stage also stopped. Several female soldiers chattered noisily, following behind the high officials to watch the excitement. The cultural troupe had never undergone unified training, and their discipline was very lax. Chen Xin didn't bother with them, letting these young girls tag along behind.

Chen Xin walked up to the row of rejected recruits. The fat soldier had a round, chubby face. Though he couldn't compare to the hugely fat Yang Yunnong, he was much fatter than the average settlement householder. Seeing a group of people who looked like high officials approaching, he was so nervous that beads of oil appeared on his face.

Yang Yunnong said to the fat soldier, "This is the renowned Regional Commander of Dengzhou Garrison, Lord Chen."

The fat soldier dropped to his knees with a thud. Chen Xin smiled and nodded at Yang Yunnong.

Yang Yunnong said impatiently to the fat soldier, "Get up, get up. There's no kneeling salute in the army. How many times have you been told? Now, why are you so fat?"

The fat soldier scrambled to his feet and stared in astonishment at Yang Yunnong's physique, looking him up and down. Yang Yunnong, a large ball topped with a smaller ball, was a full size bigger than him — yet here he was asking why he was so fat. For a moment, the fat soldier couldn't process it.

Yang Yunnong gave a dry cough and barked angrily, "Speak!"

The fat soldier jolted alert. "My family runs a small grain shop. I'm the only child at home. My mother gave me lots to eat every day."

Huang Side stepped up and asked, "An only child? Why did you want to join the Dengzhou garrison as a soldier? And why weren't you selected?"

"My mother said if someone in the family serves as a soldier, we'd be eligible to compete for one of those market shops. So I came. In the running just now, I came in last. I couldn't lift the stone either. The officer said I'd been eliminated."

The crowd of eliminated soldiers nearby let out low snickers. The fat soldier's face grew redder.

Chen Xin walked over and asked with a smile, "This officer is the Regional Commander of Deng Garrison. You weren't selected as a combat soldier in this draft, but there is a cultural troupe here, which also counts as military service. Would you be willing to join?"

The fat soldier, having been interrogated in succession by several high-ranking officers, was utterly flustered. He had no idea what this cultural troupe did. Just as he was about to agree, he recalled seeing someone performing opera in the distance earlier. Still retaining a sliver of sense, he asked, "My lord, what does the cultural troupe do?"

Huang Side answered with a beaming smile, "Performs opera." He pointed at the cultural troupe members watching the excitement behind him. "You'll be with them. The lord has said, propaganda is also combat."

"Ah! Opera performers!" The fat soldier let out a miserable cry. It really was opera. He did not want to become an actor — how shameful that would be. His family counted as petty bourgeoisie in the village and ate very well. He had been fat since childhood and was often mocked by the village children. He was very thin-skinned and dreaded speaking in public or anything of the sort.

"I…" The fat soldier hastily shook his head, ready to refuse. Just as his head turned, a pretty face appeared before his eyes, peeking out curiously from beside Huang Side to look at him. Her two eyes sparkled brightly. Though her skin was a bit dark, she was brimming with a lively spirit, and her gaze was full of mirth.

The fat soldier was dumbstruck for a moment. His head-shaking turned into slow motion. Their village had never had such a good-looking woman. He stared blankly at the woman's curved, smiling eyes, his head still swaying slightly. After a long while, he murmured, "I… am willing. I am… willing."

Huang Side straightened his chest and waved a hand. "Good, then transfer him to the cultural troupe." He turned to face Chen Xin and immediately lowered his posture by a third. "My lord, the rehearsal schedule for this play is extremely tight. In about a dozen days, we have to perform for the new recruits here. This new actor knows nothing at all. Could he be exempted from the new recruit assembly training and start rehearsing with the cultural troupe first, then make up the training later?"

Chen Xin had no intention of using the cultural troupe for combat anyway. After a moment's thought, he agreed, "Rehearse first, make it up slowly later. One month of assembly training is enough for these soldiers."

Huang Side answered in a low voice, then turned back to face the fat soldier, who was still staring blankly. Immediately, he straightened his chest again and said to the fat soldier, "You have been conscripted. You will join the cultural troupe to rehearse the play today. You must play that Tatar well."

The fat soldier was still staring at Guan Xiaomei and had not even heard clearly what Huang Side said. He murmured in reply, "Okay, I understand… What!? Play a Tatar?" The fat soldier suddenly caught on and hastily turned his head to look at Huang Side in panic.

"You will play the Jianzhou Chieftain Huang Taiji."

The fat soldier plopped down onto the ground and wailed, "No! I won't play a Tatar! I'm not joining the cultural troupe! I want to go home!!"

The eliminated soldiers and cultural troupe members nearby all burst into loud laughter, including Guan Xiaomei — several of the female soldiers giggled and laughed together in a knot. Yang Yunnong stepped up, smacked him hard on the head, and scolded, "You were conscripted into the army just now. Now you want to go home — that makes you a deserter. According to Dengzhou military law, deserters shall be… shall be executed."

The fat soldier stopped his howling and looked at Yang Yunnong with utter despair. Huang Side had already swiftly summoned the conscription officer from the Military Affairs Division and told him to register the fat soldier's military record. The conscription officer came up and gave him a kick. "Stand up!"

The fat soldier scrambled to his feet. The conscription officer immediately used his whip to teach him how to stand at attention. The fat soldier was struck repeatedly, crying out in pain, and his learning speed was extremely fast.

The conscription officer asked in a voice like a roar, "Name!! Age!!!"

"My name is Tang Wei! I'm seventeen in nominal years! Haven't reached full… Aiya!" (To be continued.)

ps: Begging for monthly tickets! Begging for monthly tickets!! Begging for monthly tickets!!!