Chapter 85: Just Call Me Your Wife

Xia Xi's reflex arc is longer, so her roommates shouted in surprise before she reacted, hugging Wang Qiuyu and planting a series of fierce kisses on her face: "Qiuyu, you're really my benefactor!"

Without Wang Qiuyu's help, she couldn't get Xu Yanfeng's WeChat; without WeChat, she'd have no chance to communicate with him, after all she couldn't catch him in person.

In short, Wang Qiuyu fired the first shot in her campaign to pursue the male god.

Wang Qiuyu pushed her away, feigning disgust as she wiped her face: "You'd better hurry up and think about how to start a conversation with the male god. You finally got his WeChat—don't mess it up."

Oh yeah yeah yeah.

If she didn't remind Xia Xi, she would almost forget, leaving the newly added Xu Yanfeng on WeChat hanging aside.

Xia Xi sat down, lightly bit her lower lip, and carefully chose her words.

Happy Little Crab: "Senior Xu, hello. Since I haven't had a chance to meet you, I boldly added your WeChat this way; I hope I'm not bothering you."

After sending it, Xia Xi read it over once, her brows slightly furrowed—was it a bit too formal?

She summoned her roommates to help analyze: "Is this greeting appropriate?"

The three strategists all frowned after looking, seeming dissatisfied.

Xia Xi panicked: "Say something."

Zhao Lei bluntly said: "Too stiff and formal, not like your usual way of speaking."

Wang Qiuyu nodded, agreeing with Zhao Lei: "Indeed a bit coy; you've openly said you're pursuing him, so don't hide—this isn't good. Be bolder, throw a straight ball."

Even Wu Qinglu, who has no romantic experience, could see something was off: "At times like this, the more natural you are, the more sincere you seem—don't put on that affected reserve."

Xia Xi clutched her head, full of regret; usually so articulate, how could her skills fail her at the crucial moment?

"What now? Recall it?" she asked.

Zhao Lei quickly shook her head to stop her: "Don't recall it—that's too calculated. First see what he says, then respond accordingly."

After waiting ten minutes, Xu Yanfeng hadn't replied; Xia Xi thought it was over, like a chess game where the first move is wrong—no matter how you try to salvage, you'll lose the whole board.

Wang Qiuyu poked Xia Xi's shoulder and asked: "Haven't you introduced yourself yet?" She glanced at the screen, confirming: "He might not know who you are, so he can't reply. By rights, your friend request should have been instantly approved; he ought to be online and wouldn't have missed your message."

Xia Xi realized, hurriedly typed in the chat box while reading aloud: "I'm Xia Xi, the girl you rescued at Lan Jing Youyong Guan last Friday. Do you still remember?"

Just as she was about to send, the other side suddenly flung two pictures at her.

Xia Xi's heart jumped; she opened the pictures first— they were photos of scratch paper, covered with the solution steps to a problem, various formulas and symbols, densely written across two pages, too much for one picture, so she took two.

"What does Xu Yanfeng mean?" Xia Xi was caught off guard by this unconventional move.

The three strategists were also bewildered, completely unsure how to reply.

They stayed silent; Xia Xi decided on her own, deleted the self-introduction she had just edited but not sent, and typed a question mark.

Besides the question mark, she couldn't think of any words to express her current thoughts.

Xu Yanfeng replied quickly this time: "Didn't get it?"

Happy Little Crab: "You read it and replied randomly, right?"

Could it be that Xu Yanfeng uses this trick to drive away the girls chasing him?

Xu Yanfeng seemed to realize he might have made a mistake, asking: "Who are you?"

Remembering Wang Qiuyu's advice—she had two past relationships—to be bold and throw a straight ball, Xia Xi's fingers flew across the screen, typing a sentence even she found daring.

Happy Little Crab: "Let me grandly introduce myself—I'm surnamed Lao, given name Po; just call me my wife. 【Heart】"

*Xu Yanfeng wasn't in the dorm; he had returned to his apartment near campus. The light was on in his study, he had just finished writing the problem, lifted the cup to drink water, held his phone in one hand, long eyelashes slightly lowered, gaze casually sweeping the screen.

Seeing the words clearly, Xu Yanfeng's hand shook, spilling half a cup of water, which his pants caught entirely, leaving a patch of icy cold on his leg.

Xu Yanfeng furrowed his brows, set down the cup, grabbed a few sheets of paper, stacked them, and wiped. It was useless—the loungewear fabric was soft, skin-friendly, highly absorbent, not a drop leaked.

He went to the bedroom to change his pants, returned to the study, picked up his phone, and looked again. The message hadn't disappeared, proving it wasn't just his imagination.

Xu Yanfeng stared at the other's avatar—a red cartoon little crab with round, bulging eyes, two large pincers raised, a mouth shaped as an upward-curving arc, and a small dot on each cheek representing blush; it perfectly matched the nickname "Happy Little Crab," which indeed looks cheerful.

He tapped the avatar; the red person symbol after the nickname indicated the user was female, not the junior he had assumed.

Xu Yanfeng didn't even bother checking her Moments to figure out who she was; he lightly touched the top‑right corner of the screen, entered 'Data Settings,' and directly added her to the blacklist.

An hour earlier, he had left the library when an outside‑department underclassman chased him out, asking for help with a problem; he was in a hurry, so he snapped a photo of the question with his phone and told the underclassman he'd send the solution later.

The underclassman pulled out his phone from his backpack to add his WeChat, pressed a few times with no response, then realized his phone had died and shut down automatically sometime earlier.

He just gave the underclassman his WeChat ID, telling him to add it once his phone was charged.

He got home, busied himself with his own affairs, had just sat down to write that problem when his phone chimed—someone had added his WeChat via account search; he instinctively thought it was that underclassman and agreed without a second thought.

Afterward, he didn't look at what the other party sent; he rushed to finish the last few steps, snapped a photo, and sent it over.

The other party then sent a question mark. Up to that point he hadn't realized he'd made a mistake, assuming the underclassman just didn't grasp the solution idea—until the 'read and replied randomly' message arrived, he felt something was off.

The facts proved—indeed, it was his mistake.

He didn't know which girl had obtained his WeChat by some means and was now harassing him.

He'd seen this tactic many times, felt no ripple in his heart, set his phone aside to focus on his own matters; a while later, his phone chimed again—another friend‑request notification.

The remark field read: "I'm Pang Bowen, the underclassman who came to the library to ask the senior for help with a problem."

This was the real underclassman.

*Xia Xi screamed in the dorm late at night; even the birds roosting on the camphor trees outside were startled into flapping their wings.

"Ahhhhh, he blacklisted me! How could he blacklist me? I just added his WeChat—how did I get blacklisted right away? This isn't reasonable!"

Her three roommates, however, unanimously thought it was quite reasonable.

"You come out the gate demanding they call you wife—if they don't curse you as insane, that's already generous; blacklisting is mild."

Wang Qiuyu felt she was also at fault, hugged Xia Xi, and comforted her wounded spirit: "Honey, I told you to be bold, but not to go this wild."

Zhao Lei asked on Xia Xi's behalf: "What should we do in this situation?"

Xia Xi pulled away from Wang Qiuyu's embrace, gathered her clothes, headed to the bathroom to shower, and before closing the door tossed out: "What can we do? Go big or go home."

Roommates: "……"

Xia Xi took a shower, lay in bed tossing and turning, and remained half‑awake all night.

The next day was the Mid-Autumn Festival holiday, a three-day break; Xia Xi slept in until past ten in the morning, got up, went to the cafeteria and had a brunch, returned to the dorm, grabbed her sports bag, and prepared to go to the swimming pool.

Zhao Lei lay on the bed, eating potato chips while reading a novel; hearing the movement, she glanced down: "Xi Xi, you're going to stalk Xu Yanfeng again?"

"No more stalking; I'll swim a couple laps to calm down."

"Oh."

Xia Xi took a taxi to Lan Jing Youyong Guan.

Having been there a few times, she knew her way to the changing room, changed into her swimsuit, and headed toward the pool.

Suddenly, Xia Xi noticed a lithe figure in the pool, arms moving smoothly as the person swam with great fluidity; the figure resembled Xu Yanfeng somewhat, but she wasn't sure if it was him.

Xia Xi walked over, stood at the poolside, and stared at that figure for a while; it was definitely Xu Yanfeng.

What is this? After painstakingly waiting like a farmer guarding a stump for a rabbit, ending up with nothing, she had given up her stakeout, yet he appeared before her eyes. The fitting saying is: "Intentional planting yields no blooms; careless insertion of willow twigs brings shade."

She decided to go ask him why he had blocked her on WeChat.

(End of chapter)