Chapter 39: Stop Fighting!

It was supposed to be a quiet night, but an unexpected encounter turned it into a clamor.

"Liu Lingzhu, why are you here?"

"Dugu Ru, I should be asking you!"

"My Lord, Liu Lingzhu and Dugu Ru are fighting!"

"Really?"

Yang Kan, who had come to report, saw Li Shuang's eyes bulging like copper bells, his corners of the mouth unable to be held down!

"Hm?"

"Then why don't you go break it up!"

"As you command!"

"Wait!"

Li Shuang thought for a moment and ordered:

"Have our men surround that side courtyard and keep others from approaching."

Seeing Yang Kan go down to execute the order, Li Shuang looked at Huluguang beside him.

"A-Guang, is there anything else I haven't finished today?"

Huluguang answered with an innocent face:

"Nothing!"

"Not a single thing?"

"Not a single thing!"

"Think again?"

Huluguang counted on his fingers, listing them one by one:

"The fifty thousand cash owed by the Fei Ye Tou tribe in the west, settled with two hundred horses as debt repayment, has been recovered; the Bu Luo Jian Hu in the south had no grain, borrowed a thousand shi of grain from us, and pledged five thousand livestock and ten carts of furs from their tribe, and the matter is settled; the Che Le tribes in the east said the interest on the money we lent them was too high and planned to cause trouble, but Zhang Zhu Gao Ang dealt with them."

Speaking to this point, Huluguang had a flash of inspiration and remembered something.

"There really is one!"

"What?"

"Those Hu Ren in the north are ungrateful, daring not to borrow money or grain from you, claiming they want to be self-reliant and planning to raid instead, truly audacious! The officers and soldiers in Ma Yi City are all indignant about this and are ready to request orders to fight these damn Hu Ren; do you wish to agree?"

Li Shuang raised an eyebrow and guided him gently.

"A-Guang, remember, do not speak rashly about matters that have not been verified."

Huluguang felt somewhat guilty.

"My Lord, did I say something wrong?"

"We are the official army, the royal troops, and must care for the people. How can we let them raid on their own? With the outside so chaotic, how dangerous it is; do they know how to raid properly?"

"Then what should be done?"

"First, summon the leaders of these tribes and have them get a 'Punishing the Guilty and Consoling the People' certificate from me for free."

"And then?"

"With this certificate, they become the Ma Yi City government-run auxiliary defense force."

"Is that enough?"

"Of course not; even with an identity and the right to punish the guilty and console the people, they have no soldiers, no armor, and their horses are thin with long hair; how can they survive in this harsh northern border? They will soon discover that this way is not viable."

"Then what to do?"

"We can provide them with weapons, armor, and horses, but they must pay for them themselves!"

"But where do they have money?"

Li Shuang smiled.

"Isn't the problem solved here? They can borrow from me!"

Huluguang suddenly understood.

"My Lord, I understand!"

"A-Guang, remember, do not keep shouting for fighting and killing in the future, making us look like bandits and mountain thieves!"

Huluguang's eyes lit up, and he nodded heavily.

"Hm!"

Li Shuang nodded and asked:

"Are there any other proper matters, such as military affairs, administrative affairs, and so on?"

"Then there really is nothing."

Li Shuang felt somewhat helpless and let out a long sigh.

"It's all my damn diligence's fault, leaving me with nothing to occupy myself with on this long, long night."

"Then, My Lord, what shall we do next?"

"If all else fails, take a bath!"

"But the residence has not prepared!"

"It's not too late to prepare now!"

Huluguang was stunned.

"Start a fire now!"

By the time Li Shuang had comfortably taken a bath, the great battle in the side courtyard had reached its end.

Li Shuang had originally thought that with one being the number-one green tea of the Hetao region and the other the number-one charlatan of Hebei, their collision would surely last for three hundred rounds.

But the situation was completely one-sided!

In the small courtyard, Dugu Ru had somehow found a bamboo broom, snatched it up, and started chasing after Liu Lingzhu with it.

That stance, good lord, it really was—

Body like lightning, steps like wind, dare descend to the sea to seize dragons. Ask where the heroine has gone — she's beating the old man till he curses his mother!

Old Liu was no longer young after all, and after being tossed around for several hours, he truly couldn't hold on any longer. Dugu Ru seized an opening and kicked him flat onto the ground.

Dugu Ru grabbed the chance and delivered two crisp slaps.

Looking again at Liu Lingzhu, although he was at a disadvantage, he was quite the trooper.

That bearing, that posture, it really was—

Why ask a hero's birth? Though mired in mud, he still has spirit. The broom sweeps in, the horsetail whisk blocks, iron bones ringing, no weaker than any man!

Off to the side, Yang Kan was watching the show. Seeing Li Shuang approach, he offered a salute.

"Zuxin, why don't you go talk some sense into them?"

"One old man, one woman, fighting like this — who would dare step in!"

"True enough. If those two shameless rascals latched onto us, that wouldn't be good either. But letting it go on like this won't do either!"

Li Shuang felt he couldn't let things continue this way, so he decided to exercise his own initiative. After exhausting every means at his disposal, he shouted at the top of his lungs:

"Stop fighting, you two!"

By now the great battle had already reached its end. Even though Liu Lingzhu was iron-boned and unyielding, he could no longer hold on. Just then, Liu Lingzhu heard a familiar voice, turned his head, and a light of hope shone in his eyes.

The distracted Liu Lingzhu failed to defend properly. First, Dugu Ru swept the horsetail whisk out of his hand with one broom-stroke, then another kick landed on his backside, sending him into a wild-dog-pouncing-on-food sprawl!

However, Liu Lingzhu, sprawled on the ground, didn't hesitate for a single instant. As if aided by the gods, he leaped up, dashed toward Li Shuang, grabbed Li Shuang's thigh with both hands, and wailed:

"Lord of Ma Yi, you must see justice done for me! Look at what that shrew did to me!"

When Liu Lingzhu raised his head, he truly gave Li Shuang a fright — that bruised and swollen face, where was the immortal poise and Daoist bearing of days past?

Just then, a personal guard from outside the courtyard came to report.

"My lord, She Di Gan has returned. He's been making a fuss, insisting on seeing you!"

"How did he get back so quickly?"

Shanwu isn't exactly close to Ma Yi either — there wasn't enough time for a round trip.

"Let him in!"

But then She Di Gan rushed in. Seeing Li Shuang, he threw himself forward, grabbed Li Shuang's other thigh, and began to weep.

"Lord of Ma Yi, you must see justice done for me!"

"What happened to you this time?"

"I took your words to heart and rushed straight back to Mount La Wu. But before I'd gone far, I ran into some clansmen coming to bring me word halfway. They said…"

At this point, She Di Gan seemed to have lost all his strength, so choked with sobs he could barely speak.

"Those damnable Hu Ren robbed me! All those horses in my valley!"

Li Shuang spread his hands, somewhat helpless.

"Then what do you want me to do about it?"

She Di Gan raised his head, righteous indignation burning in him!

"Those heaven-cursed ones weren't robbing me — they're challenging the harmonious and stable northern order under the Lord of Ma Yi's governance!"

"Lord of Ma Yi, you must see justice done for me!"

……