Chapter 34

After coming out, Pangzi earnestly warned me that no matter what, I must not tell his father— that is, QingSongShu— about today's events, and even more so, I must never mention the name Qi Ye in front of his father.

From Pangzi's tone, it seemed there was some shameful secret, and moreover, just now I heard Qi Ye address QingSongShu as 'rotten bark', which made me realize their relationship… it was not just an ordinary difference.

The more this was the case, the more I wanted to gossip, I kept pestering Pangzi to spill the beans on these two old-timers' past affairs, what scandal there was. In the end, Pangzi, annoyed by my nagging, finally revealed something.

"Qi Ye is my father's senior fellow disciple."

Although this news was surprising, it wasn't exactly earth-shattering, and of course it didn't satisfy my curiosity, so I kept pestering Pangzi with questions: "Shouldn't fellow disciples be on good terms? Why do they seem to be sworn enemies?"

"Ah, are you annoyed or not" Pangzi flicked his hand, hitting my shoulder.

Instantly, my face scrunched up like a bitter melon. It wasn't that Pangzi's strength was too great, but his hand happened to land on my displaced collarbone.

Some say that when a person suffers an injury to a certain degree, they initially feel no pain, only feeling it later. For example, a car accident victim might be hit by a car yet still be able to stand and walk a few steps, as if unharmed. But afterwards they might suffer a concussion, even surgery would not be surprising.

This is because during injury, consciousness and body experience a brief separation.

For instance, I am like that now— at first I was overly excited and felt no pain. After coming out, my shoulder gradually grew sore. Especially after Pangzi slapped me hard, the pain surged up like a torrent, I slumped to the ground, my left hand completely immobile.

"Hey, are you okay? Don't scare me." Pangzi crouched down, looking at me anxiously.

I told him my shoulder hurt, my collarbone was displaced.

Pangzi, without a word, rolled up his sleeves: "Come, let me rub it for you."

"Can you do it?"

"Sure, absolutely sure— twenty years of professional bone-setting, I specialize in all kinds of… no, I specialize in treating men's injuries and women's waist sprains. You have to trust your brother Pangzi."

This time, I again chose to trust Pangzi and let him give me a massage.

But in less than a moment, I immediately regretted it— my trust was met only with Pangzi's ruthless kneading.

"Damn, you fat bastard, let go of me, be gentle, be gentle, don't use so much force, you're killing me" my anguished wail echoed from the alley.

Pangzi grabbed my left hand, sweat pouring down his forehead: "Hang in there, you'll feel comfortable soon."

No matter what I said, he wouldn't let go, but his technique was truly awful, the pain was unbearable, so we started tugging at each other in the alley; finally, I pulled him and he fell flat on top of me.

"Damn, I told you, I'll twist harder and you'll feel better soon." Pangzi, straddling me, gripped my arm tightly.

Just then, a middle-aged woman leading a few-year-old boy walked past the alley, covering her nose, unable to bear looking at us.

"I tsk, two grown men fooling around in broad daylight and shouting so loudly— truly sinful." After saying that, she covered the child's eyes with both hands and earnestly advised: "Little Bao, don't look; looking too much will give you a sty."

Her words made my blood boil; if I had a basin, I would definitely cough up three liters of blood for her to see— no exaggeration.

To make matters worse, as I flailed trying to shake off Pangzi, I somehow grabbed the child's hand, frightening the woman so much she almost knelt down.

"Oh great heroes, I beg you, if you're going to fool around, do it yourselves— don't look at my son; he's still young and doesn't understand. Our whole family has only this one son, and my husband and I hope he will carry on the family line; I beg you."

Me: "..." Pangzi: "..." The two exchanged a glance, and in perfect unison they leapt up ninety degrees, landing neatly in front of the woman.

Pangzi gave a sheepish grin: "Um, ma'am, you've misunderstood us."

The woman seized the moment, pulling the child close, giving me and Pangzi a "I understand" look, then dragged the child away in haste. Left behind, we were left wanting to cry but with no tears.

Ma'am, how should I explain this to you? Actually, I'm not into guys—I really only like women.

After the woman walked away for a while, Pangzi gave me a resentful glance: "It's all your fault, you shouted so loudly."

Me: "..." Damn it, who's really loud— me or you being unreliable?

……………………

All the way, feeling stifled and gloomy, Pangzi and I carried the herbal medicine back to Chan Yi Hall.

Although Li Xun lay on the stretcher, moaning as if near death, he probably wouldn't die just yet.

Pangzi and I brewed a dose of herbal medicine and gave it to him. At first I was curious how the medicine would relieve gas, but within moments I fully understood.

Li Xun had drunk it for less than half an hour when he suddenly started farting loudly in Chan Yi Hall, ruining any semblance of tranquility and making the place reek like a cesspool.

The fact that he could fart meant his meridians were clear; he was out of danger, and all that remained was to properly nurse his body back to health.

Although Li Xun had been punished by Qi Ye, Pangzi and I feared that once his wounds healed he'd forget the pain and continue cheating people outside Chan Yi Hall, so we spun an elaborate lie.

Pangzi drew three talismans for him and lied, saying, "If you want your illness to be completely cured, you must do exactly as I say."

After taking the herbal medicine, Li Xun's condition had improved considerably, so he naturally believed Pangzi's words without doubt.

"Master Wang, you said I will definitely follow your instructions!"

Pangzi instructed Li Xun: "Take these three talismans home, burn one each three days and drink the ashes; every evening at six, you must face east and kowtow ninety-nine times, sincerely repenting. Moreover, starting now, return to the places where you used to cheat people, find those you deceived, and repay all the money you swindled from them; once the money is returned, your illness will naturally heal."

In fact, Li Xun's illness would heal just from the herbal medicine, but to steer him onto the right path, Pangzi drew three harmless dispelling talismans for him, half-bluffing half-truth to scare him into returning the money to those he had cheated. Though a lie, it was well-intentioned, and quite natural— everyone must answer for their own mistakes; ill-gotten gains must be repaid in full.

Li Xun left with the talismans and medicine; before departing, he earnestly assured us that he would definitely follow our instructions upon returning, without the slightest hesitation.

After Li Xun left, Pangzi and I finally greeted the other person in the room, Yuan Qiu.

Pangzi plopped down beside Yuan Qiu, slinging an arm around her shoulders and asked, "Um, Yuan Qiu, what brings you to see us this time? It's not just to catch up, is it?"

At this point, Yuan Qiu sold a secret, throwing back at us: "If I'm not mistaken, Hai Sheng, you and Brother Weiqiang are Daoists, right?"

Pangzi and I glanced at him suspiciously and in unison asked, "What kind of cooperation? We don't do business."

Yuan Qiu shook her head: "No, actually if you're willing, there's plenty of business we can collaborate on; without you, I couldn't pull this off alone."

"Well then, what kind of business? We won't do anything involving murder, arson, or that goes against our conscience." Pangzi also grew curious about Yuan Qiu's idea and beforehand made clear his principles.

At this point, Yuan Qiu sold a secret, throwing back at us: "If I'm not mistaken, Hai Sheng, you and Brother Weiqiang are Daoists, right?"

I rolled my eyes— this isn't nonsense? You're not a Daoist; who helped your niece with her fetal spirit last time?

Yuan Qiu pointed at herself and then said: "Do you know what my family does for a living?"

Pangzi and I shook our heads, clueless.

Yuan Qiu said: "My family runs a pawnshop and auction business; we deal in antiques, real estate, cars— you name it. We've dealt with everyone from high society to street thugs…"

"Speak plainly, get to the point" I waved my hand, cutting off his nonsense.

"I want to cooperate with you; if I later discover any supernatural matters requiring a Daoist's expertise, I'll refer them to you! But I want to take a one-tenth 'water' cut, the rest goes to you— how about that?" Yuan Qiu held up two fingers, full of hope as she looked at us. Her eyes brimmed with sincerity and anticipation. She finally gritted her teeth sincerely and said: "Hai Sheng, Brother Weiqiang, I truly sincerely want to cooperate with you."

Before I could speak, Pangzi slapped Yuan Qiu's shoulder and said: "Done."

Me: "..." Pangzi, couldn't you be a bit more straightforward?

Although Yuan Qiu's suggestion sounded good, according to my personality, I still felt it would be better to consider it more carefully.

I pulled Pangzi aside and scolded him: 'Pangzi, don't you need to think it over? You agreed so readily.'

Pangzi clasped his hands and said righteously: 'Helping others eliminate disasters and solve difficulties is the duty of people like us; besides, my father taught me so many skills, I should make use of my strengths, otherwise I would not live up to his painstaking teachings.'

"Speak plainly."

"I've been short on money lately; I don't even have the cash to buy flowers for Sister Jingjing." Pangzi gave a shy smile and said bashfully.

Me: "......"

Finally, after discussion between the two of us, we felt Yuan Qiu's suggestion was not inappropriate. Although QingSongShu also took us to look at feng shui a few times and visited several places, frankly speaking, our experience is still pitifully lacking. How can flowers in a greenhouse withstand wind and rain? How can a young eagle protected by its mother all year learn to soar the skies? So, Pangzi and I think this is not a bad opportunity for training.

But we two are not rash, nor do we believe whatever others say. Pangzi examined Yuan Qiu's eight characters and physiognomy, concluding that although Yuan Qiu is shrewd and has a head for business, he is not a treacherous villain; only then did we agree to Yuan Qiu.

Before that, I also made a three-article agreement with Yuan Qiu: first, we will not do anything against our conscience; second, we will not do anything harmful to others; third, no matter how much money, we must see whether we are willing to do it. If we are unwilling, we can leave at any time.

Yuan Qiu readily agreed to our demands without the slightest hesitation.

"Good, since that's the case, the three of us are now partners; if there is any business in the future, I will introduce it to you two right away."

Having said that, Yuan Qiu left, full of joy.

After Yuan Qiu left, Pangzi had a somewhat puzzled question for me: 'Hey, to be frank, I don't quite understand Yuan Qiu's approach—he introduces business to us but only takes a ten percent commission; what's the difference between that and not making money?'

I smiled, pursed my lips, and shook my head: 'It seems he isn't making money, but he is actually the real big winner; there are many tricks to this.'

"Oh?" Pangzi looked at me doubtfully,

I smiled and said only two words: 'Connections'.

Immediately, Pangzi also had a sudden realization.

Yes, exactly—connections. Someone said that in this world, money is not the most valuable; wisdom is most valuable, and next comes connections. This saying is not without reason.

Nowadays, officials, nobles, wealthy merchants—most of them will invite a feng shui master to examine their homes; and how many people encounter unsolvable problems and need to ask us Dao practitioners? Although Yuan Qiu's family runs an auction house and pawnshop, his dealings with most people are merely business transactions, not close. He uses the connections in his hand to introduce business to us, and through our ties with those connections he can go a step further, building his own network.

Although we Daoists don't care about these things, for a merchant the importance of connections far outweighs money. That's why Yuan Qiu gave us a big apple to eat, and did so wholeheartedly.

"If that's what you say, then we're letting people take advantage of us for nothing." Pangzi calculated on his fingers.

I shook my head: 'No one is taking advantage of anyone; with Yuan Qiu around, haven't we also gained many opportunities for training? Moreover, you just looked at Yuan Qiu's eight characters. The day master is heavenly stem yang metal, born in winter, born at the chen hour, making it a Jiao Long emerging from water destiny; and in the eight characters, water and wood hurt the palace and see the wealth palace. The fate formula also says: "Water and wood seeing official brings prosperity, the hurting officer is clever and unstoppable, great display of talent shakes the world. Even if not entering the official tiger list, he is still a fine son of a noble family." So even without us, his future achievements will certainly not be low.'

"Moreover, his wealth, officer, and seal are all prosperous, with the wealth star transforming and draining the hurting officer's energy, so his eight characters flow smoothly; he will certainly not be a great villain." Pangzi added.

I said contemptuously: 'Since you already know, why are you asking bullshit?'

Pangzi picked his nose and mocked me: 'Actually, I already knew what you said; I just watched you say it so happily, not wanting to disturb you. Don't forget, when it comes to fate calculation, I, old man, am not just one level above you.'

I rolled my eyes, letting Pangzi continue to be self-absorbed.

However, we never expected that less than three hours after Yuan Qiu left—namely, in the afternoon—he would call us, saying there was business at the door, and asked us to follow him to handle it.

The speed was fast, exceeding my and Pangzi's expectations..