Chapter 342: The Spider Bride

“Then let him be your groom, how about that?”

The Floating Master’s voice reached him, and Xu Yuan stared in shock.

In the main hall, the red candles on the table burned dimly, casting large shadows.

In the corners, beneath the tables and chairs, darkness seemed to writhe with sinister things.

A large red “ Xi ” character was pasted on the main wall, yet it looked unnaturally dark, as if it were congealed blood.

The bride and groom wore wedding robes, each with a large red flower on their chest.

The Floating Master’s red flower, however, appeared to be grown from flesh and blood, squirming restlessly against his chest.

As the Floating Master spoke, he kept winking at Xu Yuan through the air.

“Gek gek gek…”

The bride let out a tinkling laugh, not like silver bells but like funeral chimes.

It slithered into Xu Yuan’s ears, making his brain feel cold and his nape icy.

“My lord, to say such things makes me truly heartbroken.”

“I am utterly devoted to you, our bond stronger than gold.”

“Even if I’ve taken a fancy to your friend, I can first consummate the marriage with you, then devour you, mourn you for three incense sticks, fulfill our marital bond, and then wed your young gentleman.”

Xu Yuan silently cursed: “Fucking hell…”

Now he could see clearly—the bride’s body was light as air, her face stiff and lifeless.

Her eyes and nose were painted on, crudely at that, with two copper-coin-sized patches of crimson rouge smeared on her cheeks.

She was a paper doll bride, yet somehow become a bride.

Today was a day of “forbidden weddings”—this thing was a dire omen.

Yet Xu Yuan still couldn’t fathom why the Floating Master, himself a malevolent spirit, seemed held captive by this bride.

The Floating Master loved haunting scholars—his usual tricks were ink-scented courtesans and ghostly companions for reading.

Could it be… he’d accrued romantic debts?

After the bride finished speaking, the Floating Master said: “Then why are you waiting, my dear? Let’s hurry to the bridal chamber.”

The Floating Master kept winking at Xu Yuan, silently begging him not to enter.

Xu Yuan’s foot accidentally stepped on Da Fu’s webbed foot.

Da Fu had been pulling his legs back, but Xu Yuan’s foot pressed down hard—he couldn’t pull free.

“Gah?” Da Fu blinked at Xu Yuan in confusion.

Let go, I’m going in!

Xu Yuan was still observing.

The writhing shadows inside the hall were the poisonous insects that had slipped in through the door crack.

They had merged with the shadows.

Xu Yuan’s mind stirred—he lifted his foot, and Da Fu shot upward—

Xu Yuan followed almost instantly, stepping through the door.

“Ugh…” The Floating Master was speechless.

Xu Yuan grinned: “It’s your big day—I’ve got to drink a cup of wedding wine.”

“Gek gek gek!” The bride laughed again: “Of course, of course—you’ll soon be drinking wine from our own wedding.”

Young master, don’t worry—my husband… won’t take long.”

Her painted eyebrows flicked playfully as she threw him a seductive glance.

Xu Yuan felt like vomiting.

What the hell is this?

This paper-doll maker’s craftsmanship is terrible.

The bride rose on her own; a wine jug and cups appeared on the table. She poured a cup herself, swaying her waist as she brought it to Xu Yuan.

As she walked, bamboo strips and paper creaked with a strange sound.

“Young master, please enjoy the wine.”

Xu Yuan reached out one hand—not to take the wine, but downward, grabbing Da Fu’s neck and holding him back.

“What exactly are you?” Xu Yuan suddenly asked.

The bride covered her mouth and laughed, her eyes gliding with unnatural stiffness.

“I am the bride you are to wed.”

“You dare!” Xu Yuan roared, and spat—a torrent of fire erupted from his dantian.

This time, Xu Yuan held nothing back.

The full force of his Sixth-Level abdominal fire burst forth like a dam breaking, instantly filling the entire hall.

Crackling, popping…

Countless poisonous insects in the shadows burst into flames.

Da Fu cried “Aong aong aong!”—mourning the loss, mourning the loss.

The bride shrieked—her paper body instantly turned to ash.

Xu Yuan drew his blade and slashed.

Lightning flashed, illuminating the entire hall in blinding white.

The lightning surged like furious dragons, racing outward.

The pillars and beams of the hall carbonized and shattered instantly.

The walls and windows ignited just as swiftly.

The entire house revealed its true form—all of it was paper and bamboo.

The beams and pillars were bamboo strips; the walls and windows were paper pasted and painted.

Amid the lightning and flames, a glint flashed.

Three hairpins shot out and plunged into the ground.

Pinning a poison spider the size of a washbasin to the floor.

“Aaah—”

The poison spider screamed, black venom oozing from its wounds, rising in wisps of thick yin energy.

The three hairpins were Fifth-Level crafted artifacts.

Had they been weaker, they might not have pierced this malevolence in one strike.

Da Fu was startled.

This insect was enormous.

If Da Fu hadn’t blocked him just now, and he’d rushed in recklessly… who would’ve eaten whom was anyone’s guess.

Da Fu had smelled it from the start—the hall was full of insects!

When the door opened, Xu Yuan had used “Wang Ming” to take a glance.

He’d sensed the presence of a malevolent spirit, but not its true form.

Different malevolent spirits required different countermeasures.

Da Fu was hell-bent on charging in—Xu Yuan knew then this wasn’t some wandering ghost.

If it had been a ghost, Xu Yuan might have released the Six-Eyed Ghost Moth.

To capture a great spirit and bind it to his service.

That would’ve been troublesome—the Six-Eyed Ghost Moth had already been captured by this poison spider.

The giant poison spider’s round belly bore white patterns, resembling the crude painted face of a paper doll.

Its nature was this: after mating, it devoured the male.

After becoming a malevolent spirit, it longed to be a bride every night.

Over the years, it had devoured countless men, refined countless souls; its body teemed not only with poison but also with swirling yin energy, granting it ghostly abilities.

The three hairpins held the malevolence fast—it writhed in agony, shrieking as it spewed venom and silk.

Xu Yuan had anticipated this—he tossed his carriage forward, covering it instantly.

The venom and silk splattered against the carriage walls.

But this time, Xu Yuan did not unleash more fire to smother it.

Instead, he flicked his finger—the set of counting rods flew inside.

They arranged themselves haphazardly, locking the spider malevolence completely within.

Xu Yuan had no intention of killing it yet.

“The venom and silk are valuable materials.”

“Take it back to the furnace!”

“See what we can refine.”

Xu Yuan retracted the carriage; his abdominal fire burned the insects and the house to ash.

The Floating Master trembled.

When the flames first erupted, they rushed toward him.

He cried inwardly, “My life is over!”—but the flames roared around him, burning the fleshy red flower on his chest to ash, lifting his bindings.

Yet he dared not move a muscle.

One wrong motion, and that fire might brush him…

Xu Yuan collected the flame and the long knife, and Da Fu, following the scent, swallowed the charred insects one by one.

They were surprisingly crispy and fragrant!

Xu Yuan grinned at Master Piao: “My apologies, my apologies—I’ve disturbed your romantic encounter.”

(End of Chapter)