Chapter 26

Why does Zhuge Liang marry A Chou as his wife?

1o9 Why does Zhuge Liang marry A Chou as his wife?

Liu Guozong

One,

"Fans" pester him not a few, but he has not a single "root" that catches his eye; "star-chasers" chase him not a few, but not a single one meets his liking——

Since Zhuge Liang picked up a nickname, "fans" and "star-chasers" have been pestering him nonstop. Some send nauseating messages, some write tear-jerking love letters, some simply cling on relentlessly—you go there, I'll "follow" that; if I can't "kiss", I'll throw a "flying kiss".

Faced with those affectionate, righteous, and fairy‑looking maidens, Zhuge Liang is both pleased and a bit annoyed. He is pleased that a nobody, a poor boy preparing to be a bachelor for life, now has so many beautiful women chasing him and not letting go—this is a good thing beyond his wildest dreams. What annoys him is that among these star‑chasers, the genuine and the fake are mixed, hard to tell apart. Some seek profit, some seek fame; of course some just do it out of boredom and emptiness, chasing for fun. There isn't a single righteous person, not even one; not a single red‑petal confidante, not even one. But no matter why those "fans" and "star‑chasers" act, Zhuge Liang remains unmoved.

I, Zhuge Liang, how could I be a lecher? How could a proper gentleman sink into greed for women's beauty? Zhuge Liang has long known the principle: "Since ancient times, emperors who lust after beauty topple states; scholars who love beauty ruin their careers; people who cherish beauty lose their reputation." In the matter of taking a wife, I, Zhuge Liang, will certainly not choose by looks; I seek talent, not beauty.

Looking at Zhuge Liang growing day by day, in the blink of an eye he's in his twenties. A man should marry when grown, a woman should wed when grown. Although many matchmakers come to the door proposing matches, this Zhuge Liang hasn't found a single one to his liking. He is single‑minded, stubborn to the core. Zhuge Liang says he's not anxious or worried, but his family is anxious: the neighbors and peers his age have all taken wives and held sons, while Zhuge Liang remains a lone bachelor.

Two,

Flowers bloom in pairs, each branch tells its own story. Beside Zhuge Liang there is an ugly girl who still harbors a little feeling for him——

Flowers speak in pairs, each branch tells its own story. Speaking of Zhuge Liang's teacher Huang Chengyan, he has a "thousand gold" daughter named "A Chou". They are both in their twenties and still unmarried. In the past, saying a man in his twenties has no woman wasn't particularly rare. This girl, in her twenties, if she still hasn't found a husband's family, it's troublesome, because once a woman reaches thirty her chances are gone. Many have spoken of marriage for A Chou, but none suit her taste. Either they fault the man for being too tall, or too short, or too fat or too thin—something always wrong. In short, she can always find a flaw. Neither high nor low works. At that time, marriage was arranged through matchmakers, not as free as today, where it's as free as buying goods in the market.

When the mountain doesn't move, the water does—opportunity has arrived. Someone gave A Chou a matchmaking proposal: "What's this Zhuge Liang kid like? He's your fellow disciple, looks tall and handsome, and is full of strategic talent, with ability enough to outshine eight dou. If you marry him and become allied by the Qin‑Jin bond, I guarantee you a life free of blame."

"Look at my ugly appearance—who could possibly take a liking to me? If he really did, he'd have to come himself to propose. Only then could I marry him. Otherwise, no way." A Chou says "no way" with her mouth, but in her heart she still has a little "that feeling" for Zhuge Liang. Because she knows him: Zhuge Liang is broad‑minded, stands tall as heaven, stands firm on earth, resourceful and strategic—a true man. To be his lifelong companion would be unparalleled in this world or any other. Although he now dwells in a thatched hut on Wolong Ridge, often subjected to ridicule—that is "the dragon lying in shallow waters, played with by shrimp."

Three,

One plants flowers with intent, yet they do not bloom. Zhuge Liang says, "A Chou is my junior sister; how could I harbor designs on my teacher's "thousand gold" daughter?"—

The matchmaker also heard that there was something hidden in A Chou's words, so he went to Zhuge Liang to talk about matchmaking. Zhuge Liang, hearing this, became very angry and said to the matchmaker: "Huang Chengyan is my benefactor; how could I secretly scheme against his daughter's marriage?"

Upon hearing "foreign devil performing opera, dazed", the matchmaker said: "I meant well to help them, how could you say I was secretly scheming against them? I never expected my good intentions to be regarded as dog's liver and lungs. You, Zhuge Liang, are an eight-generation bachelor, a nine-generation monk, and I won't act as matchmaker for you." Zhuge Liang's few words drove the matchmaker away in anger.

Part four: Who would have thought that A Chou was also the world's number one talented woman, leaving Zhuge Liang staring dumbfounded――

As the saying goes, "Without coincidence, no book." One day, Zhuge Liang's benefactor Huang Chengyan celebrated his birthday; Zhuge Liang brought a gift, filled with gratitude, and came early to wish him a happy birthday. The guests gathered, the banquet was set, and everyone praised the books, poetry, and paintings in Old Master Huang's room without cease. Especially Zhuge Liang, unable to put them down, heartfelt and sincere, exclaimed: "This person's talent surpasses others, his ambition reaches a thousand miles. His poetry, calligraphy, and painting are above our peers; to befriend him would be a fortune of three lifetimes. May I ask, benefactor, what is this person's surname and name, and where does this eminent scholar come from?"

At the banquet, a clever and quick-witted little maid who was serving tea and water to the guests exclaimed, "This is the great work of our household's Eldest Daughter, Miss A Chou!" The guests were astonished, and Zhuge Liang stared dumbfounded: "Who would have thought there exists such a talented woman in the world!"

Part five,

Zhuge Liang wasn't really there to look at flowers; he had an ulterior motive――

After the meal and drinks, the guests dispersed. Zhuge Liang went to the garden to stroll about.

In fact, Zhuge Liang's strolling was a pretense; he merely used the walk as an excuse to speak with Miss Huang. This 'ulterior motive of the drunken patron' is obvious. It is a tactic commonly used by lovers worldwide, like Lin Daiyu in Dream of the Red Chamber, who in her heart longs for Baoyu but dares not say it outright, so she sends him an old handkerchief under the pretense of a gift to convey her feelings; the Song dynasty poetess Li Qingzhao, hearing that her fiancé Zhao Mingcheng had arrived, wanted to go see her future husband's bearing but felt embarrassed, so she pretended to go back and forth to the gate to sniff the fragrance of green plums. Actually, was the poetess really there to sniff the plums? No, she merely used the excuse of sniffing plums to steal glances at her beloved.

Part six,

A vicious dog lunged at him, and Zhuge Liang jumped in fright――

Little did he know that as soon as Zhuge Liang entered the rear garden, a vicious dog lunged at him, causing him to stagger backward repeatedly.

"Don't be afraid, don't be afraid, Mr. Zhuge! This is a dog made of wood. Though its appearance is frightening, it does not bite." The little maid explained with a smile.

"A dog made of wood?" Zhuge Liang said half-believing, half-doubting.

"Don't believe me? Try touching it with your hand." The little maid said.

Zhuge Liang, still shaken, crept forward intending to touch it. As his hand touched the wooden dog, a sudden whoosh sounded, and a fierce tiger leapt out from the bushes and sprang before him.

Zhuge Liang was horrified, frightened to the point of falling to the ground.

"Sir, don't be afraid, this is a wooden tiger made by our young lady. People say tigers **cannot be touched, but please go ahead and touch it!" The little maid teased.

Zhuge Liang got up from the ground, touched the wooden dog, then touched the wooden tiger, and exclaimed, "Your young lady is truly a living Lu Ban!"

"Mr. Zhuge, there's even more ingenuity to come." The little maid said, "Would you like to see it?"

"Don't keep me in suspense and scare me; if there's more marvel, just take me to see it quickly." Zhuge Liang said.

Part eight, Zhuge Liang followed the little maid into the rear garden, where bees flew about in chaos and butterflies danced wildly. Amid the fallen blossoms, Zhuge Liang again beheld a marvel of the world――

"Sir, come with me." Zhuge Liang, harboring a curious heart, followed the little maid into the rear garden.

The rear garden was silent and still; it was the cusp of late spring and early summer, with bees flying about in chaos and butterflies dancing wildly throughout the garden.

Yet Zhuge Liang could not appreciate the beautiful scenery before him; he wanted to investigate what kind of miracle a talented woman had created.

Just as Zhuge Liang anxiously looked around, proceeding cautiously, a whoo-whoo sound came from deep within the flower house. Zhuge Liang followed the sound and looked――

Only then did he see, deep in the thicket, two modest thatched huts; it turned out the sound was coming from inside those huts.

"Who is grinding there?" Zhuge Liang strode purposefully toward the thatched hut.

Zhuge Liang approached the thatched hut, pushed open the door, and saw a tall man operating a grindstone. Upon seeing someone enter, the tall man did not lower the handle of the grindstone, but continued to push it with his chest held high.

Zhuge Liang clasped his fists and bowed: "Elder brother, thank you for your hard work; I pay my respects." The elder brother acted as if no one were there, continuing to turn the grindstone at a leisurely pace. Zhuge Liang thought, "This grindstone operator must surely be deaf, his hearing poor."

Zhuge Liang raised his voice a bit and said to the man operating the grindstone, "Elder brother, thank you for your hard work!" Yet the grindstone operator still ignored him. Zhuge Liang thought, "This man operating the grindstone must surely have water in his head."

At that moment, the little maid following Zhuge Liang laughed nonstop. Zhuge Liang was left in a fog by her laughter, feeling dazed.

Seeing Zhuge Liang's befuddled expression, the little maid explained: "Mr. Zhuge, this 'elder brother' operating the grindstone is a masterpiece made of wood by our young lady. It can only work, it cannot speak."

"Your young lady is truly a marvelous woman of the world!" Zhuge Liang exclaimed involuntarily.

Just as Zhuge Liang was incessantly praising his benefactor's daughter, he suddenly saw a girl drenched in sweat, pushing a small

cart walked toward the mill where Zhuge Liang was……

Part nine, Zhuge Liang sucked in a breath of cold air and said: "Can the world really have such extraordinary people and events?"

Zhuge Liang saw a girl pushing a small cart, wobbling as she rushed toward him. Startled and at a loss, he kept stepping back. Just as the girl's cart collided with Zhuge Liang, the cart overturned, scattering wheat everywhere; it turned out the cart was loaded with wheat, and the girl pushing it also fell to the ground.

Zhuge Liang repeatedly said, "Sorry, miss! Sorry, miss!" But when he approached the girl pushing the cart, he was startled even more: the girl pushing the cart was actually a wooden figure, truly unexpected!

This wooden person could not only operate the grindstone, but also push a cart to transport grain.

This is the little maid beside him, displeased, saying: "Mr. Zhuge Liang, how dare you block my young lady's"

's grain-transport cart.'

"Your young lady's grain-transport cart?" Zhuge Liang asked, puzzled.

"Yes, this is the grain transport cart made of wood by my young lady. It's called the Wooden Ox and Flowing Horse. Do you understand?" the little maid said, deliberately mocking Zhuge Liang.

Zhuge Liang secretly admired and praised his teacher's daughter's extraordinary talent, yet he felt unconvinced by the little girl's words before him. Thinking to himself, he blurted out: "You also underestimate people too much; there is nothing in the world that I, Zhuge Liang, do not understand."

"Alright, you say you understand, my lady says this wooden ox and flowing horse can only be made and understood by her alone, no one else can. If you are smarter than my lady, then please lift up the person and the cart lying on the ground—how about that? Do you have this courage?" The little girl deliberately made things difficult for Zhuge Liang.

Nine,

Zhuge Liang finally found the mechanism, understood the reason, and also thought of other uses for this wooden horse and flowing cart——

Upon hearing the words of Miss Huang's maid, Zhuge Liang said, very unconvinced: "Your lady is also bullying people too much! I cannot find the mechanism and hidden button of this wooden ox and flowing horse; I swear I will not be a person!"

"Then please go ahead!" the little girl said, and flicked her sleeves away.

Zhuge Liang faced the 'young lady' and the cart lying on the ground, turning it over and over in his hands, pondering deeply. That Miss Huang is no ordinary mortal, and this Zhuge Liang is no common man.

After a period of deliberation and thought, Zhuge Liang finally found the mechanism and hidden button to lift up the 'young lady' and the cart lying on the ground. He made them walk again, and at the same time he completed the diagram of the wooden ox and flowing horse; a grand and far-reaching idea also appeared in his mind——using this wooden ox and flowing horse in the Eight Trigrams formation, to make up for the deficiency in the Eight Trigrams formation, making the Eight Trigrams formation have movement in stillness. This is like having searched high and low in vain, then finding it effortlessly.

Ten,

Lovers finally become family, Zhuge Liang became A Chou's ideal husband——

Zhuge Liang, while playing with A Chou's maiden's wooden ox and flowing horse, also calculated: movement and stillness combined, that is the essence of the Eight Trigrams. I was worried that the Eight Trigrams lacked movement; could A Chou's wooden ox and flowing horse be specially made for my Eight Trigrams research? Wait until one day I, Zhuge Liang, have a place to display my talents and become a military advisor; this wooden ox head can be used to grind flour as a good tool for garrison farming grain; the flowing horse used on the battlefield can also make the enemy hear the wind and lose courage; using it for transporting grain and fodder in mountainous areas is also very convenient. This is truly heaven helping me.