Chapter 26: Audacious Beyond Belief

In the afternoon at the Goushi County government office, Zhao Fang, the County Accessory Attendant for Banditry stationed in the side corridor, was reviewing the county’s criminal documents.

It must be said, the position of Accessory Attendant for Banditry was a very important and powerful post in a Han dynasty county. Generally speaking, if not for the jailer still holding some power of arrest and seizure, this position would essentially be equivalent to grasping all public security, prosecution, and judicial authority in later ages. Of course, the premise was that the County Magistrate and the Assistant County Magistrate above him were not fond of hoarding power.

And speaking of this, Zhao Fang’s luck was rather good, because both the County Magistrate of Goushi County and that Assistant County Magistrate were students of the classics. With so-called grand prospects ahead, their eyes were always looking upward, so such low-level mundane affairs had always been left to the various section attendants in the county to handle. Add to that the fact that the county jailer was a tactful man who had always followed Zhao Fang’s lead… well, Attendant Zhao’s days could not have been more comfortable.

“Lord Zhao.” A rare sight — a subordinate clerk directly under the Assistant County Magistrate appeared at Zhao Fang’s workplace.

“Clerk Zhang.” Zhao Fang immediately stood up warmly. There was no helping it; in officialdom, sometimes one could not judge attitude by rank. This was his superior’s ‘secretary’ — try putting on a sour face and see what happens. “This is a rare sight. Is there some matter, or does the Assistant County Magistrate have instructions?”

“It is not only the Assistant County Magistrate.” This subordinate clerk cupped his hands in reply. “The County Magistrate is also in the hall, and bids you come at once.”

Zhao Fang immediately straightened his expression, adjusted his robes and cap, and followed the man, hurrying toward the hall.

Of course, on the way, Attendant Zhao could not help but ask a few more questions: “Clerk Zhang, thank you for your trouble. Do you know whom else the County Magistrate has summoned besides me?”

“There is also the jailer, Lord Huang.” Clerk Zhang was also amiable.

Summoning both himself and the jailer — it was certainly some case that had arisen. Attendant Zhao reacted at once: “Then does Clerk Zhang know who it is, and what crime was committed?”

“I truly do not know the specifics.” This Clerk Zhang shook his head repeatedly, but out of consideration for the other’s standing in the county office, he added a few more words. “I only know that it is that youxia leader of the county, Yuan Zhong. Bare-chested, he was delivered to the front of the hall by a group of Hebei scholars from Mount Goushi. They simply said that someone literate from the county office should come out to receive the man. But after Clerk Gao came out, that group of scholars said nothing at all and just left directly. And that Yuan Zhong was dead drunk, not uttering half a word.”

“What kind of matter is this?” Attendant Zhao was dumbstruck. “Just call any county runner to go to the street and have Yuan Zhong’s companions come fetch him… How did it alarm the Assistant County Magistrate and even the County Magistrate?”

“This is precisely what makes this matter so suspicious.” Clerk Zhang continued in a low voice. “For some unknown reason, after that Clerk Gao saw Yuan Zhong, his expression changed drastically, and he went directly to report to my superior, the Assistant County Magistrate. And after my superior saw Yuan Zhong, he immediately ordered the county runners to carry that scoundrel Yuan Zhong into the hall, and also invited the County Magistrate. The County Magistrate then sent us to summon Lord Zhao and Lord Huang…”

Zhao Fang was utterly baffled.

However, before Attendant Zhao could think much further, he had already arrived at the hall. Before he could even kneel to pay respects, the County Magistrate’s icy voice rang out from above: “Zhao Fang!”

“Present!” Attendant Zhao, hearing the tone was off, hurriedly lowered his head and knelt.

It must be said, among the Han dynasty gentry, kneeling was generally not practiced. But the full title of Banditry Attendant was actually Accessory Attendant for Banditry — under whose auspices? The County Magistrate’s. In the Han dynasty’s dual-lord system, a subordinate officer facing his direct superior was akin to facing his sovereign. When the sovereign was enraged, what of it if your bones went soft and you knelt?

In fact, nothing escapes the human heart. It was precisely because of this logic — that when a superior grew angry, an inferior’s legs went weak — that a very common kneeling ritual existed in the Han dynasty: namely, pleading guilty!

Attendant Zhao was in fact kneeling to plead guilty.

“I entrusted the county’s public order to you, yet never expected you would breed such an arrogant scoundrel!” The Assistant County Magistrate’s voice also rang out at once.

“It is all my incompetence!” Zhao Fang was still utterly confused. Was this arrogant scoundrel Yuan Zhong or that group of Hebei youths? Nevertheless, that did not stop him from admitting fault first.

“Enough, do not delay!” The County Magistrate’s voice sounded again. “Zhao Fang, you and the jailer Huang Yu go together. Use my official carriage to deliver this audacious scoundrel to the government office of Lord Zhu, the Intendant of Henan, in Luoyang City. When you arrive, you must clearly explain to all the worthies under Lord Zhu’s command that this villain was seized by me the moment he swaggered through the streets. Request Lord Zhu’s clear judgment!”

Having spoken, without waiting for Zhao Fang and that jailer to assent, the County Magistrate and the Assistant County Magistrate hurried away as if avoiding something.

A single word from a superior sends subordinates running themselves ragged. The moment they left, Zhao Fang and this Huang Yu swiftly rose and called for hands… preparing to deliver that scoundrel Yuan Zhong to Luoyang before dark. And yet, even at this moment, Zhao Fang still did not know what exactly this Yuan Zhong, the great xia who was so considerate in every way and extremely adept at reading situations, had provoked.

Getting drunk, not saying a word, and just snoring — could that also be a capital offense, warranting a special cart to escort him to Zhu Ye, the Intendant of Henan, that supernumerary high official? If so, would his own monthly tribute not be cut by more than half from now on?

Just as he was letting his imagination run wild, Zhao Fang felt someone tugging at his official robe. Turning his head, it was unmistakably the jailer Huang Yu… He saw that this colleague’s face was pale, one hand clutching his own official robe to barely stay upright, while the other hand pointed at that Yuan Zhong on the ground.

Zhao Fang followed the other’s fingertip and fixed his gaze upon the arm of the great xia Yuan Zhong. In this third month of spring, he actually felt a chill shoot from the soles of his feet straight up to his neck, making his whole body sway unsteadily. In the end, it was likewise by grabbing Jailer Huang’s official robe that he barely managed to stand firm.

“Lord Zhao.” Jailer Huang recovered his composure first, his face pale and utterly bloodless. “This great xia Yuan Zhong is doomed beyond escape this time, is he not?”

“Ai!” After steadying himself, Attendant Zhao also drew a sharp breath, but did not directly answer his colleague’s question. “The leaders of that group of Hebei scholars are those two brothers called Gongsun Zan and Gongsun Xun, are they not? I have met them too. Both started as commandery clerks; by any reckoning, they should be respectable men. How could they strike so viciously?!”

The entire hall fell silent.

Lamentations aside, the work still had to be done quickly. The County Magistrate’s official carriage was prepared. This great xia Yuan was directly lifted onto the carriage, banners were raised, Jailer Huang watched over him inside, and Attendant Zhao, in his prime, personally drove the cart. Seven or eight county runners rode horses as escorts, and off they went in a single file toward Luoyang City.

Yuan Zhong was awakened by a basin of cold water being splashed on him.

Still seven-tenths drunk, the great xia Yuan hugged his arms, squinting as he looked around at his surroundings. It seemed to be a prison… This place was somewhat familiar, but it felt cleaner and brighter than the one in the county. He did not know if it was an illusion brought on by too much drink.

“Yuan Zhong, is it? From Fengguan Hamlet, Changping Village, Goushi County?” A man dressed in official robes, shaped like a jailer, appeared before him, basically confirming the great xia Yuan’s conjecture. “Where is your ancestral home?”

“Did I get drunk and lie down in the road, violating the curfew?” The great xia Yuan slurred with a giggle. “Brother, you seem… seem somewhat unfamiliar? To be honest with you, I am indeed Yuan Zhong. I have connections with your Jailer Huang and Attendant Zhao… It’s just the county curfew, why be so serious? When there’s a chance… I’ll take you out of the city at night to have some fun!”

“Then many thanks.” This jailer lowered his head and smiled. “But great xia Yuan, you do not know — today, Luoyang City has dispatched quite a few officers to patrol public order, so we have no choice but to be a bit more stern.”

“I understand!” The great xia Yuan continued to laugh, hugging his arms. He vaguely felt a stinging pain somewhere on his arms, not knowing if it was from scraping something when he was brought into the prison earlier. “You mean we should keep a low profile, right? This matter… this matter, just send someone to say so, and I will naturally stop the night racing, so as not to cause trouble for you gentlemen. Why go to the trouble of specially summoning me here?”

“It is precisely because we feared you would not understand keeping a low profile…” The jailer said with his head lowered. “In this region of Henan, who does not know the mighty name of great xia Yuan?”

“A trifling reputation, makes you laugh… laugh, brother.”

“I dare not be your brother.” The jailer seemed to hear some movement behind him, so he became more direct. “Well then, great xia Yuan, let us continue… Where is your ancestral home?”

“Wu region.” The great xia Yuan answered cooperatively. “An island at the mouth of the sea where the Long River ends, very remote, the kind of place where birds don’t even shit… By my father’s generation, we abandoned the ancestral property and followed those who came to Yangzhou to recruit soldiers, coming to the capital to make a living…”

“Then great xia Yuan, what is that on your arms?”

Yuan Zhong looked dazedly at his own arms, and sure enough, saw some kind of writing or pattern on the outer side of his arms. Coupled with that faint stinging sensation, he suddenly realized: “This… this is naturally a tattoo! What…”

“I understand.” The jailer nodded repeatedly, but cut off the great xia Yuan’s train of thought. “Great xia Yuan’s ancestral home is Wu region, and it is a custom of Wu region, existing since ancient times. Tattoos there are a mark of honor, unlike the tattooing punishment of the Central Plains. Besides, these days, as long as it is not on the face, even Central Plains people have tattoos. I have heard that in Nanyang, quite a few illicit lovers who have privately pledged themselves to each other like to tattoo each other’s names on their bodies?”

“That is indeed so.” By now, Yuan Zhong was somewhat on guard, but the intoxication surged up, and he could only answer with difficulty. “Nanyang, after all, belongs to Jingzhou. Brother, you do not know, but men on both sides of the Great River often have to bare their bodies. Wherever bodies must be bared, the custom of tattooing as beauty… naturally exists.”

“Enough, one last question.” The jailer finally raised his head. Judging by this man’s attire, it was actually quite neat, unlike that of an ordinary jailer. “Is the great xia Yuan Zhong literate?”

“Naturally!” The great xia Yuan answered with particular crispness. “I was illiterate before, but these years I have specially studied reading and writing, and have already ascended the hall and entered the inner chamber!”

The jailer turned his head to look behind him. Seeming to have received some instruction, he paid no more heed to this great xia Yuan, but directly stood up and walked out.

Yuan Zhong was alarmed and uncertain, and the wine gradually sobered to seven-tenths. When he looked again at his surroundings, he was even more vigilant. He turned his gaze to his own arms, but could only recognize that some characters had been tattooed there. It seemed there had only been time to apply the medicinal liquid; the scabs had not even formed yet… He also recalled the matter before he got drunk, of being called to the wine shop by Gongsun Zan and his group. For a moment, his head ached as if it would split, and he completely could not figure out what was going on… Surely those Hebei fellows had not tattooed some rebellious text on his arms, had they?

But looking closely, he could only make out the characters ‘Henan’, ‘live’, and ‘die’. Any further reading was truly too difficult.

“Alive, fear not the Intendant of Henan; dead, dread not the King of Youdu!” A short while later, in a narrow courtyard no more than a hundred paces from the great xia Yuan, a middle-aged man with the air of a scholar was stroking his beard, tilting his head back toward the moonlight and chanting something. “Fine tattoo! Fine literary talent! Fine dominance!”

And right behind this scholar dressed in plain clothes, over a dozen officials wearing official seals and ribbons were kneeling neatly in rows, not even daring to raise their heads — clearly also collectively pleading guilt. At this moment, upon hearing these words, they buried their heads even deeper together. As for that jailer who had asked the questions earlier, he was simply kneeling far away at the prison entrance, not daring to approach at all.

“To think that I, Zhu Ye, come from a long and distinguished family line, with renowned ministers generation after generation. When my great-grandfather was still a child, even bandits praised him as ‘a blade within a child.’ Later, he was even appointed Prefect of the Masters of Writing, overseeing all court administration. My grandfather studied Confucian arts from a young age; after his passing, Court Consultant Cai Yong honored him with the posthumous name of Zhenxuan. And my father, grieved and indignant at the eunuchs’ meddling in politics, first abandoned his post as Inspector of Jizhou to become a convict laborer, for whom a thousand people submitted petitions to cry out his injustice, and later abandoned his post as Minister to die for his principles, with Court Consultant Cai honoring him as the posthumous Duke Wenzhong… You all tell me, how is it that when it comes to me, Zhu Ye, in my tenure as Intendant of Henan, there springs forth a line: ‘Alive, fear not the Intendant of Henan; dead, dread not the King of Youdu’? Is my virtue, Zhu Ye’s, so meager as to come to this?!”

So it turned out, this scholar was actually the current Intendant of Henan, Zhu Ye, scion of four generations of renowned ministers!

“My lord!” An official behind him mustered his courage to offer a word of comfort. “Just now I have already inquired clearly. This tattoo was likely only recently applied. That County Magistrate of Goushi immediately had this audacious scoundrel sent over… Such arrogant and reckless words may not necessarily spread… Would my lord not first set his mind at ease?”

“Forget it!” This supernumerary Intendant of Henan, Zhu Ye, suddenly sighed. “Why speak such self-deceiving words? Just watch — before many days, this ‘Alive, fear not the Intendant of Henan; dead, dread not the King of Youdu’ will spread throughout Wan and Luo… I, Zhu Ye, am also a man who knows shame. Rather than vainly regret here, it is better to restore public order and recover some virtue. As they say, it is not too late to mend the pen after the sheep are lost… You all prepare as well. This year, all the youxia and great magnates under Henan’s jurisdiction — arrest those who should be arrested, execute those who should be executed. Absolutely do not permit a second great xia Yuan Zhong to appear!”

“We respectfully obey!” The group of Henan Intendant’s subordinates kneeling behind immediately assented.

“In that case, I shall return to rest first. You all disperse as well! It is not… not any great matter!” Having said this, this Zhu Ye, Grand Intendant Zhu, was actually about to leave the place.

“My lord…” At this moment, an official suddenly could not help but press another question. Of course, the moment he asked, this fellow regretted his tactlessness. “How should that Yuan Zhong in the prison be dealt with?”

“Since the great xia Yuan Zhong does not fear me, the Intendant of Henan,” Zhu Ye said without turning his head, “then send him to meet the King of Youdu!”

"Yes!" the assembled officials answered as they rose to their feet.

And only after watching their own Grand Administrator disappear from sight did the lead official turn back with a dark face and gesture for the prison clerk kneeling far off at the porch to rise: "Did you hear? Beat him to death with clubs! Then have his family collect him and hold the funeral rites... If his household has no money, we will hire a Daoist priest for him to go meet the King of Youdu!"

"Yes!" The prison clerk, trembling and shivering, nevertheless mustered all his strength and answered loudly.

"In the Xiping era of the Later Han, there was in Goushi County under the jurisdiction of the Intendant of Henan on the outskirts of Luoyang City a youxia named Yuan Zhong, who often acted lawlessly and was a scourge upon the county, whom the people of the county could not restrain. The Martial Emperor, Grand Ancestor of Yan, traveling to study at Mount Goushi with his clan brothers and village youths, was also much troubled by him. One day, the Grand Ancestor called him over to drink, and when he was dead drunk, hired a tattooist to inscribe characters upon his arms. On the left: 'Alive, I fear not the Intendant of Henan,' and on the right: 'Dead, I dread not the King of Youdu.' This done, he left him on the road. Zhu Ye, Intendant of Henan, heard of it and laughed, saying: 'Then send him to meet the King of Youdu.' Thereafter the county was at peace." — A New Account of the Tales of the World, Chapter on Quick Perception

PS: There is also a new book group. Interested readers can join: 684558115.

As promised, this minor character was to be born lowly and die greatly... I wonder if Uncle Yuan Zhong is satisfied?

(End of Chapter)