Chapter 128

Do you still have even a trace of longing for Xiao Jingyuan?

When the Crown Prince asked that, Song Xizhi froze for a moment.

She thought, yes, there is.

How could there not be?

In her previous life, if nothing had gone wrong, she ought to have been his wife, spending the rest of her life with him.

But fate insisted on tearing them apart, letting her fall from a height into dust and mire, miserably sinking into the abyss, staining herself with blood and filth.

And he forever remained the lofty flower on the mountain peak, the flawless bright moon in the high heavens, silently looking down on her.

So.

Rather than longing, it would be more accurate to call it obsession.

Her feeling for Xiao Jingyuan is just like the Crown Prince's for her: because she cannot have him, she wants to possess him.

Only with affection does obsession arise; when obsession deepens, one can no longer tell how much is love and how much is hate.

"If I say I do, will Your Highness mind?" Song Xizhi's voice was that light, drifting in like clouds and mist.

But the Crown Prince felt the person in the mirror growing ever clearer; as he looked at her, he seemed to see himself clearly as well.

This answer was entirely within the Crown Prince's expectations, so his expression did not change at all.

He did not answer, but instead lifted Song Xizhi horizontally and strode straight to the bed.

Song Xizhi slowly closed her eyes.

If she said she didn't, the Crown Prince wouldn't believe her; by openly admitting it, he would cling tightly to her for that obsession.

The man pressed her onto the soft bed, buried his head in a deep kiss, and murmured, "Zhizhi, you are mine; you are not allowed to think of him again."

The candlelight flickered, and the two gauze curtains were lowered.

After half an hour, the Crown Prince had fallen into a deep sleep.

Song Xizhi, however, kept her eyes open, her hands folded over her lower abdomen, unable to sleep, for the Crown Prince had just told her that Xiao Jingyuan was spending a pleasant night with a woman at the Cloud Pavilion.

The Crown Prince did not say who the woman was, nor did she ask, but the face of Shen Shuangning flashed in her mind.

Last night, Shen Shuangning also appeared at the Cloud Pavilion.

Song Xizhi then recalled the night at Prince Yan's mansion when she had set aside her dignity and offered herself to Xiao Jingyuan.

"If the heir refuses to accept me, could it be that he already has someone else in his heart?"

Xiao Jingyuan gave a cold face and said, "Get lost."

She did not retreat immediately, but stood before him, stubbornly gazing at him and asked, "Is it Shen Shuangning?"

Xiao Jingyuan said nothing.

At that time he was affected by an aphrodisiac incense; his flawless jade-like face bore an abnormal flush, one hand supporting his forehead, the other propped on the painting screen, and he never looked at her.

Song Xizhi slowly removed her garments, stepped forward, but her eyes held no passion or desire, only resentment and dissatisfaction: "Heir, look at me—what do I lack compared to her?"

But before she could draw near, she heard a loud "Bang!"

The painting screen was toppled whole onto the ground, splitting into several cracks. Song Xizhi's heart jolted; she dared not move another step forward, and stared in shock at the man.

Yet a flash of cold light appeared, and in the next moment an icy long sword was already pressed against her neck; its sharp blade even nicked a fine line of blood.

The man's slightly pale lips parted slightly, and he said coldly, "If you don't leave now, then don't bother leaving at all."

Song Xizhi clutched her neck and fled in panic, but as she was about to step out the door, she heard his utterly indifferent voice coming from behind—

"From today on, you are no longer worthy to be mentioned alongside her."

"No longer worthy to be mentioned alongside Shen Shuangning."

Song Xizhi slowly clenched the brocade quilt, her expression wavering, and finally she curled the corner of her mouth into a faint smile.

In her previous life, when the Song family suffered disaster, was confiscated and exiled, she in a distant foreign land occasionally heard news of him. It was said he married the Fourth Miss of the Duke of Rongguo's residence, who was a cousin of her former friend.

She was a few years younger than her, quite beautiful, but overly naive.

She had never regarded Shen Shuangning as a threat.

But until that day...

She clearly remembered that it was her last time going to observe the ladies' rites competition.

When the Song family was at its most glorious, she entered the palace as the eldest daughter of the Song household; along the way, palace maids, eunuchs, and the young ladies who came to watch all greeted her with fawning smiles.

"I heard the Young Master Xiao has returned to the capital; the eldest Miss Song has waited years, and finally her love will come to fruition."

"The marriage alliance between Prince Yan's mansion and the Song family is truly a match made in heaven!"

"Miss Song and Master Xiao standing together are surely a talented man and a beautiful woman, enviable to others. From now on, if we wish to get close to Miss Song, we'll have to weigh our status first!"

At that time the news of the Song family's marriage talks with Prince Yan's mansion had already spread; hearing those teasing remarks, she naturally found them pleasing, and for Xiao Jingyuan she was also determined to win him.

Later, when the party arrived at the venue, someone nearby lightly poked her shoulder and joked, "Miss Song, the heir seems to be looking at you!"

Song Xizhi's heart stirred slightly; she lifted her head, and not far away, Xiao Jingyuan sat astride a horse, upright and handsome, his noble bearing standing out in the crowd, instantly noticeable.

But the next second, the faint joy that had quietly risen in her heart turned cold.

The person he was looking at was clearly not her.

This is a woman's unique, almost instinctive intuition, so clear that she cannot deceive herself.

Later she followed his gaze, and eventually her eyes fell on a spot not far from her—there stood a woman whose radiant smile outshone the sunlight above her head.

Shen Shuangning.

He was looking at Shen Shuangning.

The memories of her two lives almost overlapped.

In this life, the one who captured his gaze remains Shen Shuangning.

She once thought that Xiao Jingyuan's interest in Shen Shuangning was merely a man's ordinary appreciation of beauty—like admiring a delicate trinket or fleeting pleasure—and could never involve any deeper bond.

Even if he married her, it would not involve deep feeling.

But only now did Song Xizhi realize she had made a huge mistake.

Inside the Eastern Palace, candlelight blazed like daylight, yet only the Crown Princess's bedchamber continually glowed with a warm, moist light.

In the silent night, a few suppressed coughs sounded.

Then came a woman's weak voice: 'Hasn't the Crown Prince returned yet? Where is he entertaining tonight?'

The palace maids inside the hall lowered their heads, each as silent as a cold cicada, none daring to speak first.

Seeing their demeanor, the Crown Princess couldn't help but frown and ask, 'Why isn't anyone speaking?'

After a moment, the maid nearest to her timidly lifted her head, her voice tinged with obvious hesitation: 'Your Highness the Crown Prince... he went to the Song residence, and up to now he still... hasn't come out...'

In a corner of the bedchamber still burned the mandarin-duck glass lamp the Crown Prince had given on their wedding day, its warm red glow quietly flowing through the hall.

When the Crown Prince had offhandedly praised the lamp as looking festive, she had taken it to heart and lit it every night.

Upon hearing the maid's words, the Crown Princess stared at the lamp in a daze, the light in her eyes dimming bit by bit.

Finally, she lowered her eyes wearily and said, 'Put out all the lamps; I'm not waiting anymore, and I won't wait from now on.'

Putting on an act, Shen Shuangning returned to the Duke's mansion together with her close friend Su Ran, and no one else in the household suspected anything.

Su Ran didn't ask where she had gone that night, and even if she did, Shen Shuangning wouldn't tell.

Su Ran stayed a few days in the Orchid Garden.

This girl was carefree by nature, yet she could see that Shen Shuangning was preoccupied, lacking her usual liveliness, and even Ah Heng appeared silent.

Su Ran therefore thought it was because of Young Lord Xie.

No, she couldn't call him Young Lord Xie anymore, for he had resigned his position as heir before leaving the capital.

After all, he was going to marry into the Jurchen state as a foreign prince-consort; to outsiders it was like spilled water—no chance of returning—and thus he naturally had no right to inherit the marquisate's estate.

As for the lineage of Xie Yongnian, there were only two legitimate sons: Xie Lin had departed, and Xie Yan's whereabouts were unknown, plus he was a condemned official.

Thus the heir's position of the Yongning Marquis's mansion could only remain vacant.

Su Ran recalled recent rumors and said, 'I also heard that the marchioness had moved out of the marquis's mansion to a Buddhist temple in the suburbs to practice austerities, on the very day Xie Lin left the capital.'

Hearing this, Shen Shuangning stared blankly for a moment; it was much like her previous life.

Seeing her expression, Su Ran secretly chided herself: 'Why did I bring up Ningning's painful matter again?'

Su Ran quickly changed the subject, idly scooping up a handful of melon seeds, and began to gossip about the capital: 'Right, I heard that the Crown Prince spent the night at the Song residence the day before yesterday, and the next day he didn't return to the Eastern Palace to handle affairs but instead took that Miss Song out for a boat ride on the lake.'

Shen Shuangning furrowed her brows: 'Is that true?'

Su Ran pursed her lips, looking rather disdainful.

'Isn't it said that engaged couples should avoid each other before marriage, meeting less, or else it's inauspicious?'

'The Crown Prince, though, acts so ostentatiously—doesn't anyone remind him? I can't fathom whether he truly cherishes and protects that Miss Song or is merely trampling on her reputation.'

Shen Shuangning pondered, discerning a somewhat unusual meaning.

With Prince Chen's consort selection imminent, Song Xizhi nevertheless allowed the Crown Prince to flaunt his affection, which was utterly unlike her usual low-key demeanor.

'There's still one more thing...' Su Ran blinked and asked, 'Do you know Prince Chen?'

Shen Shuangning's eyelid twitched: 'What happened to him?'

Su Ran said, 'Wasn't I just back at the mansion this morning? I also heard from my father that Prince Chen's beloved horse went mad and actually broke his leg! I think it's karmic retribution!'

The censor who had been injured by Prince Chen's horse in the hunting grounds earlier was none other than Su Ran's father.

Naturally, Su Ran hated him to the point of gnashing her teeth.

Shen Shuangning secretly thought, such a vicious hand likely had something to do with Xiao Jingyuan.

After cursing Prince Chen a few more times, Su Ran then said, 'Ningning, you've been cooped up at home for days; if you stay longer you'll get moldy. Come on, I'll take you out for some fresh air and fun.'

Su Ran reckoned in her mind, there are plenty of handsome, outstanding young gentlemen out there—why hang herself on the tree of Xie Lin? Who knows, walking forward she might meet someone even better!