Chapter 205

He pushed aside the sourness in his heart and briefly sketched the past: "The princess never mistreated me; after she died, the Jurchen State wanted me to

Shen Shuangning had also heard that the carefree Jurchen princess had died in a royal power struggle, and Xie Lin, as her prince consort at the time, must have been in a bad situation, surely facing grave danger while fleeing.

And in his absence, she too had gone through several life‑and‑death trials.

Shen Shuangning was about to speak when Xie Lin suddenly added, "Nothing happened between us."

Shen Shuangning was taken aback by those words, blinked, and instinctively lifted her eyes, meeting his solemn gaze.

She was momentarily at a loss for words.

The atmosphere grew subtly awkward, and Xie Lin realized his remark was ill‑timed, likely only adding to her worries.

Xie Lin hurriedly explained, "Don't overthink it; I didn't mean anything else."

Shen Shuangning turned her face aside, changed the subject: "I should go; Mother's been waiting a long time."

Xie Lin pressed his lips, the words on the tip of his tongue reducing to a soft "Okay."

Just as Shen Shuangning turned to leave, Xie Lin stepped forward quickly and blurted, "That night, you didn't show up at Yunxiao Lou—was it because you resented me for abandoning you to go to the Jurchen state for the marriage alliance?"

Shen Shuangning's body stiffened imperceptibly for a moment.

She had gone.

But he had arrived too late.

From an angle Xie Lin couldn't see, Shen Shuangning closed her eyes and ultimately did not explain what had happened that day.

She tilted her head slightly and said softly, "You're overthinking; I've never blamed you. Take care." Having said that, she did not look back and left together with Ah Heng.

Xie Lin stood where he was, his raised hand still hanging in midair. He really wanted to hug her.

As that slender figure faded into the distance, his hand finally lowered slowly.

Shen Shuangning returned from outside and was about to go back to her room.

But just as she reached the door, she reached out to push it, only to find it bolted from inside, refusing to budge no matter how hard she tried.

She instantly sensed something was wrong; she had just heard the servants say Xiao Jingyuan had already returned and should be in the room.

She therefore asked tentatively, "Xiao Jingyuan, are you in there?"

The room was silent; just as she was about to call out again, a muffled "bang" suddenly came from inside.

Like the sound of porcelain shattering on the floor.

Shen Shuangning quickly raised her hand to knock on the door, shouting, "Xiao Jingyuan, open the door—what's happened?!"

"Ningning, don't come in, I'm fine," Xiao Jingyuan's voice finally came from inside, though it was hoarse and clearly strained.

It sounded as if he were gritting his teeth, forcing each word out with all his strength, every syllable betraying unbearable pain.

How could that possibly sound like "I'm fine"?

"Are you having another poison outbreak? Quickly open the door and let me in!"

But her shout received no reply, and the room fell silent again.

Shen Shuangning panicked at once, tried to shove the door open with force, but to no avail; she had to call someone to kick it down.

The guard Qing Yun, stationed outside the courtyard, heard the commotion and rushed over immediately.

"Madam, please step back so I don't accidentally hurt you."

Shen Shuangning obeyed and stepped back, her gaze worried as she stared at the tightly shut door.

With a "bang," Qing Yun kicked the door open.

Shen Shuangning rushed in without hesitation, lifting her skirt, and saw Xiao Jingyuan half‑slumped over the table, one arm limp and hanging.

His ink‑black hair was disheveled, spread across his neck and the table; his white hair seemed to have increased, and the half of his face visible was deathly pale, devoid of any color.

Beside his hand lay an exquisite brocade box, opened and empty inside.

Shen Shuangning's pupils contracted; she hurried to his side, supported his shoulder, and asked in a trembling voice, "What did you take?"

The brocade box had contained the medicine Pei Zhi gave him back when they were in Tongzhou; its purpose was unknown.

Hearing her urgent call, Xiao Jingyuan lifted his scarlet eyes, glanced at her for a moment, then raised his hand to caress her cheek: "I told you not to come; why did you still come in? You're so disobedient."

A chill shot up from her spine to her crown in an instant, and for the first time Shen Shuangning sensed the threat of death emanating from him.

The man said, "You promised me you'd stay with me properly; you can't abandon me."

Shen Shuangning replied, "What are you talking about? Of course I won't leave you."

"But you went to see Xie Lin again. Is he really that good that you can't forget him?"

Shen Shuangning was about to speak to explain, but before her soothing words could leave her lips, Xiao Jingyuan seized her mouth fiercely, depriving her of breath in an instant.

His lips and tongue invaded, laced with hidden anger.

Seeing this, Qing Yun's scalp tightened; he instinctively wanted to avert his gaze, but fearing the master's state might hurt the lady, he turned away, his whole body tensed.

Shen Shuangning was gripped tightly at the waist by Xiao Jingyuan, her whole body pressed against the table, unable to move an inch; his kiss carried an almost destructive possessiveness.

The next second, a sharp pain shot from her lips, a hint of bloody sweetness spreading through her mouth—he had actually bitten through her lip.

Shen Shuangning's round, moist almond eyes instantly reddened, and she bit back defiantly.

Xiao Jingyuan let out a muffled grunt, his gaze on Shen Shuangning's eyes darkening instantly, and he said, "Get out."

He was speaking to Qing Yun.

Qing Yun lingered not a moment, left at once, and remember to close the door.

Xiao Jingyuan's warm lips trailed along her ear, settling on her neck, his tongue seeming to brush her skin, making Shen Shuangning tremble.

"Do you know what I most want to do right now?" Xiao Jingyuan lifted his eyes, red blood vessels creeping across the whites.

Shen Shuangning's eyes, just forced to shed physiological tears, were now watery as she looked at him.

Xiao Jingyuan directly stripped the woman's clothes, then supported her waist and laid her on the icy table, one hand exploring downward while the other gripped the back of her neck, deepening the kiss.

The faint scent of blood in the air was quickly replaced by a wave of heated intimacy; he was more intense than before, driven by an almost destructive, profound desire.

Shen Shuangning's scalp went numb, the leg resting on the table went weak and trembled; she clenched her teeth, barely suppressing a sound. Her snow‑white foot, unable to touch the ground, dangled in its silk stocking, swaying as if about to fall.

After their lips parted, their foreheads pressed together, their ragged breaths intertwined.

A speck of fresh blood still stained the man's pale lips, yet it curved into a near-sickly arc; the calloused pads of his fingers lightly rubbed her flushed cheek, flushed from emotion.

His movements were so gentle, as if touching a priceless treasure, yet his next words sent a chill through everyone.

"Let's die together, okay?"

As soon as his words fell, his hand slid down violently and then he clenched tightly around her fragile neck!

The blood in his eyes grew ever darker, filled with destructive obsession, as he watched her life slip away bit by bit......

Suddenly, Xiao Jingyuan jerked awake, the blood in his eyes draining completely, leaving only overwhelming terror and collapse.

What has he done? He actually killed her?

Shen Shuangning had just caught her breath, her whole body weak and sore; seeing his eyes finally regain clarity, she thought he was fine, but the next moment she saw his face filled with panic, tears streaming.

"How are you? Are you still feeling unwell? Don't worry, I've already sent someone to summon Mu Yu; you'll be fine." She cupped his face in both hands, heartbroken as she wiped away his tears.

She had never seen him cry so heartbroken; his bean-sized tears fell pattering, almost imprinting themselves on her heart.

Xiao Jingyuan trembled all over, sensing her warmth, and only then did his sluggish reaction kick in— the scene of him choking her neck, watching her die in his hands, had merely been his hallucination.

Yet his heart continued to race, the huge wave of dread and self-reproach flooding over him like a tide.

He dared not imagine what he would become if he hadn't awakened in time, if the hallucination had become reality.

"Ningning...... I'm sorry......"

His voice broke beyond recognition, his tears falling even more fiercely as he carefully pulled her into his embrace, "I'm sorry, I'm sorry...... I just...... I just almost......" almost killed you.

Shen Shuangning had no idea what terrifying hallucination Xiao Jingyuan had just experienced; she merely thought his mind was unsettled from the poison's onset, and she gently patted his back, like soothing a frightened child: "It's alright, it's alright, don't blame yourself."

Who would have thought Xiao Jingyuan would suddenly shove her away and, without a word, burst out the door.

Shen Shuangning didn't even bother to put on her clothes; sensing something wrong, she hurriedly shouted outside: "Qing Yun, stop him quickly!"

Outside the door, Qing Yun immediately set off in pursuit, and the hidden guards in the courtyard followed as well.

But Xiao Jingyuan was already highly skilled in martial arts; if he truly wanted to flee, Qing Yun could exert all his strength in pursuit and still only watch that black-clad figure recede farther and farther.

In the end, they lost him completely.

Xiao Jingyuan seemed to have vanished into thin air; Shen Shuangning had people search the entire city for a full half month, yet they could not find where he was.

No one knew whether he was dead or alive.

That evening, Qing Yun returned to the Duke's Mansion with his head bowed in dejection, lowering his head to report: "Madam, I am incompetent; the people I sent have searched every corner of Jingcheng and its outskirts, yet still found no trace of the master......"

Shen Shuangning's face bore a hint of fatigue; over the past half month, she had hardly gotten a single night of restful sleep.

After hearing Qing Yun's report, she gritted her teeth and whispered a curse: "Xiao Jingyuan, you coward!" Her eye sockets, however, grew red and wet.

Shen Shuangning drew a deep breath, her face cold, and said: "Withdraw everyone; we're not searching anymore."

Qing Yun stared, startled, and lifted his head.

Shen Shuangning gently stroked her belly, lowered her gaze, and spoke softly: "Since he wants to keep hiding and not show himself, I'll find another stepfather for the child."