Chapter 207: I Will Find Eighteen Handsome Young Men

Shen Shuangning seemed to sense his breath in her sleep, instinctively nuzzling into his embrace; her black hair slipped from her shoulder and lay across the soft couch behind her.

The woman's cheeks were flushed with a light red by the room's warmth, her full lips tinged pink, showing a touch of loveliness.

"How endearing," Xiao Jingyuan murmured, a softness flickering in his eyes.

After gazing at her for a while, he couldn't help lowering his head to kiss her cheek; recalling the vile Zhai Ji, a flash of cruelty crossed his eyes.

She was so beautiful, like moonlight from the clouds—pure and clean; anyone who defiled her deserved death.

When Shen Shuangning woke again, she found herself lying on the bed in the chamber, covered with a soft cloud-brocade quilt.

All was quiet, only the candle on the table burning steadily, serene and warm.

Shen Shuangning stared at the canopy, blinked, and a doubt rose in her heart.

She clearly remembered dozing on the couch by the window before sleep; how did she end up on the bed? Had she sleepwalked in a half-dream?

Just then, Mu Yu entered with the fetus-soothing medicine, interrupting Shen Shuangning's thoughts.

After watching Shen Shuangning take the medicine, Mu Yu took her pulse, then left with the empty bowl.

Afterwards, Aheng brought delicate pastries and hot water, served Shen Shuangning her snack, then readied a handkerchief for her to wash up.

Shen Shuangning asked Aheng whether she had been the one to carry her to the bed.

"No, I've been in the outer room all along," Aheng replied.

"Wasn't it you who massaged my shoulders?"

Aheng shook her head: "Maybe it was some little maid."

Shen Shuangning stopped asking, suddenly recalling the recent oddities.

After becoming pregnant, she grew prone to drowsiness, occasionally dozing on the couch; yet each time she woke, she found herself covered with a blanket, the drafty windows shut, sometimes waking already in bed with her shoes and socks removed...

She had always thought it was the maids being thoughtful, never questioning it, but now it seemed otherwise.

Thinking this, Shen Shuangning ordered: "You may go out later; no need to attend my bath."

Aheng, though a little doubtful, still answered obediently.

Last night the wind and snow did not cease; outside, snow had accumulated two fingers thick, while the house was heated by ground ducts, so it wasn't cold.

Warm vapor filled the air; Shen Shuangning leaned in the tub, her hair loose, her whole body suffused with a faint pink.

Time passed slowly; just as the water in the tub began to cool, a tall figure appeared reflected on the carved screen.

Xiao Jingyuan saw her eyes closed, seeming asleep, so he took a nearby handkerchief to wipe her down, then lifted her from the tub.

Feeling the water's slight chill, Xiao Jingyuan's handsome brows furrowed; he thought he must replace Shen Shuangning's attendants.

After gently laying her on the bed, he was about to fetch her folded inner garments when suddenly the corner of his robe was seized.

"Where are you trying to hide again?"

Xiao Jingyuan turned his back to her, his figure stiffening slightly.

Seeing him then, Shen Shuangning finally understood why Qing Yun and his men had never found him—he had always been by her side, merely never revealing himself openly.

Shen Shuangning sat up, wrapped in the quilt, her snow-white shoulders exposed, still bearing the red mark from half a month ago.

Xiao Jingyuan saw it, guilt and heartache welling uncontrollably in his eyes, his lips pressed tighter as he reached to pry open her fingers clutching his sleeve.

But Shen Shuangning clenched even tighter; fearing to hurt her, he dared not use force, and could only plead helplessly: "Ningning, don't do this, listen to me."

Shen Shuangning stubbornly said: "Why must you hide from me? How long will you keep hiding—until death?"

Xiao Jingyuan dared not meet her gaze, his voice hoarse: "If you knew what I saw back then, you'd understand why I acted this way."

"I don't understand!!" Shen Shuangning shouted, eyes red: "You're clearly unafraid of death, so why have you become so timid?"

Xiao Jingyuan's heart felt as if a knife had torn a great hole in it, bleeding profusely, yet the blood that flowed was icy, devoid of any warmth.

He pulled her into a fierce embrace, summoning all his strength to utter a complete sentence: "Being with me, you will die."

A bitter feeling welled in Shen Shuangning's chest; she curled her lip slightly and whispered: "Let me die then—I've died before. I'm not afraid; what's a big man like you scared of? How embarrassing."

Some scalding liquid splattered patter-patter onto her neck and shoulder, as if it wanted to burn holes through her heart.

She heard him say: "I cannot bear to watch you die. Ningning, I want you to live well."

Xiao Jingyuan brushed his lips against hers with extreme gentleness, yet it carried a resolute intent.

A salty taste lingered—whose tears, she could not tell.

Outside, Mu Yu, Aheng, and the others heard the commotion within, all deeply distressed.

Mu Yu glanced at Qing Yun and Qing Feng, who held ropes and chains nearby, and said softly: "If the lady cannot keep him, we'll have to resort to this measure."

Qing Yun and Qing Feng nodded firmly, looking as if facing a great enemy.

At that moment, a young servant hurried over, as if bearing urgent news.

But just as he was about to speak, Mu Yu and the others shushed him, signalling him to stay silent.

Qing Feng went further, covering his mouth and dragging him aside.

Indoors, Xiao Jingyuan helped Shen Shuangning put on her inner garments; no one spoke during the process—then she suddenly raised her hand and slapped him.

Xiao Jingyuan, a martial artist, could easily dodge, yet he let her palm strike his face without resistance.

That slap landed heavily, leaving Shen Shuangning's palm somewhat numb.

Xiao Jingyuan's handsome face quickly showed the imprint of fingers, yet he seemed unconcerned as he grasped her hand, asking anxiously: "Does it hurt?"

Shen Shuangning remained silent.

Xiao Jingyuan rubbed her palm, then asked: "I just saw Mu Yu bring you the herbal decoction—are you ill?"

Shen Shuangning, furious to the point of death, jerked her hand away, turned her back, and lay down: "Get out—never come back again. When you die, send word so I can remarry."

Xiao Jingyuan knew she spoke in anger, yet he couldn't help feeling jealous, pressing his lips: "Who do you want to marry? Xie Lin or that Pei Zhi?"

Shen Shuangning glanced back at him, retorting: "Who I marry is none of your business. No, I won't marry—I will find eighteen handsome young men to serve me together."

Xiao Jingyuan clenched his fingers: "Under the laws of Great Liang, only men may take three wives and four concubines."

Shen Shuangning choked for a moment, then shot back: "Then I'll go to the Jurchen State, where it's legal—I'll take eighty handsome youths, and no one can interfere!"

Xiao Jingyuan remained silent for a long while, finally replied softly "Okay", and also said: "As long as Ningning is happy."

He said that with his mouth, but what he thought in his heart was: "Handsome young man, right? One counts as one, kill them all."

Xiao Jingyuan tucked the blanket in for her, then got up and left.

Just as he was about to reach the door, he heard Shen Shuangning's aggrieved voice: "You don't want me, you don't even want your own child?"

Xiao Jingyuan's expression changed drastically, he was utterly astonished.