Chapter 53: Three Rules

"If you ask me, if one-third—no, one-tenth—of the women in the world were as clear-headed as Xia Yehe, the world would definitely be ten times, no, a hundred times better than it is now!"

On the way back to Shanghai, Qi Yuntian was driving, speaking loudly as if making a declaration.

Chen Nuo said, "Are you that happy that I'm not dating anyone?"

"Bullshit! As your agent, if you decided to date at your current age, I'd have to wave flags and beat drums to cheer you on. I'd definitely be cursed to death by my peers."

"By the way, Xia Yehe sent me a text message. Do you want to know what it said?" Qi Yuntian drove the G-Wagon with one hand, the scenery on the highway flying past him, looking both imposing and domineering.

Chen Nuo asked irritably, "Why would she send you a text message?"

"Because I'm her bestie. Got a problem with that?"

"……What did she say?"

Last night, his arrival had clearly provided the girl Xia Yehe with immense comfort, and it had made his trip worthwhile.

It wasn't just in the back seat of the car, where the girl had given him a passionate, salty-tasting kiss.

Afterward, the two had talked a lot about the situation, which also involved a problem they had to face: how they would get along in the future.

However, at that moment, Chen Nuo hadn't expected Xia Yehe to take the initiative and propose a suggestion that caught him off guard.

This made him really want to know what she had told Qi Yuntian.

Because even in his countless romantic encounters in his previous life, no woman had ever taken the initiative to tell him, "I won't be your girlfriend, I'll just be your woman."

"She said she doesn't want to be your girlfriend," Qi Yuntian said in a deep tone. "This isn't because she doesn't love you, but because she knows her place. She's just an ordinary sparrow, while you are a male... who is about to spread his wings and fly high..."

"Alright, alright, stop!" This elementary school essay-style writing gave Chen Nuo goosebumps, and he quickly called a halt. "Can you speak like a human?"

"Hahahaha, don't blame me. That's really what her text said. I threw up two basins' worth before I finished reading it."

"…………Alright, I get it. Say no more, just drive."

Qi Yuntian drove well, but he didn't shut up. He continued, "Alright, now I'm relieved. You two are doing just fine right now. I'm very satisfied. Otherwise, I really..."

At this point, he glanced at Chen Nuo and said, "Speaking of which, I want to have a heart-to-heart with you."

Chen Nuo was still thinking about Xia Yehe and said absentmindedly, "Talk about what?"

"Talk about you."

"If anyone else were like you—winning a Berlin Best Actor award right out of the gate and having your family background—wow, I wouldn't know how many bottles of champagne I'd pop or how many beauties I'd play with. I'd probably be following behind you every day picking up condoms."

"But you? The first thing you said to me on the phone after winning Best Actor was that you wanted to go back to Xichuan to read books."

"On one hand, being your agent is really worry-free, but on the other hand, I kind of suspect you might be sick."

Chen Nuo interjected, "……Whether I'm sick or not, don't worry about it. Since you're so worry-free, shouldn't you lower your salary a bit?"

"Hahahaha, NO WAY! Actually, at your age, being handsome, having a rich dad, and now stepping into an entertainment industry filled with beauties, I totally understand if you want to play around with women in the future. However, I want to set three rules with you."

"……You say?"

"First, whoever you get involved with, tell me directly. Like Xia Yehe this time, there was no need to hide anything from me. I'm your agent, not here to play mind games with you. I don't want to dig into your private life every day, and I certainly don't want you to hit the headlines one day while I'm kept in the dark."

Qi Yuntian was uncharacteristically serious. Chen Nuo listened in silence and then nodded. "Alright."

"Second, play is play, but don't think about publicly dating anyone before you're 30."

"Fine."

"Third, I understand women, and I'm not afraid of them. If you have many women in the future and they want to make a scene, I should be able to help you smooth things over. Like Xia Yehe, you don't need to worry about her in the future; I'll keep an eye on her for you. However, there is one exception: pregnant women. So, you must, must take safety measures. OK?"

"Absolutely OJBK!"

Chen Nuo discovered that choosing a gay man as an agent was, if nothing else, really fucking great in this regard.

It was equivalent to the Grand Steward of the Imperial Household in ancient times. Managing the harem—they were professionals at that.

The two chatted while driving. When lunchtime arrived, Qi Yuntian found an exit and got off the highway.

Driving a short distance along the road, they saw a restaurant by the roadside with a sign that said "Neijiang Catfish."

The restaurant wasn't big, and the owner was indeed from Xichuan. Chen Nuo ordered a plate of spicy garlic catfish in Xichuan dialect. Turning his head, he saw Qi Yuntian staring intently at the TV on the wall, watching very seriously.

The TV screen was playing an interview, and the person being interviewed looked very familiar. The program was already reaching its end.

Host: "Don't you think it's a bit difficult?"

The teenager smiled: "But I'm not in a hurry."

Afterward, the narrator on TV summarized:

"When Chen Nuo said he wasn't in a hurry, I was speechless. I suddenly remembered that the teenager in front of me is only 18. When he said he wanted to win an Oscar, what came to my mind were issues like race, discrimination, and language. But a month ago, surely no one in the world would have thought this 18-year-old teenager could win Best Actor at the 55th Berlin Film Festival. So, let us wish him well, and hope that regardless of the outcome, Chen Nuo will enjoy the joy of cinema on this journey."

Qi Yuntian waited until the narrator on TV finished speaking, then said speechlessly: "Oscar? You really dare to say that~"

Chen Nuo said: "What's there not to dare?"

Qi Yuntian looked at him quite seriously and said: "You think you can do it?"

"Heh, so many people can't do it, why should I?"

"Then you're just looking for trouble?"

Chen Nuo smiled: "But if you don't try, who knows?"

Qi Yuntian was thoughtful. "If you're really aiming for this goal, we'll go to Hollywood after you graduate from university. It just so happens I have acquaintances there."

Chen Nuo smiled. "Alright. I have acquaintances there too."

"You have me; I'm your acquaintance."

Qi Yuntian thought Chen Nuo was joking with him, but in fact, Chen Nuo wasn't. He really did have acquaintances in Hollywood.

The two of them casually, as if joking, set such a seemingly crazy goal, but acted as if nothing happened, sitting down to wait for their meal.

Five minutes later, the landlady brought the fish up. Qi Yuntian took a bite and shouted: "Wow, why is this fish so spicy? Chen Nuo, don't you know I can't eat spicy food?"

"Heh, you can't even eat spicy food, how are you going to go to Hollywood with me? Be a little young and reckless, eat up!"

The boss behind the counter suddenly interjected: "You're Chen Nuo, right? I just watched the program. You've brought glory to our Xichuan. Good, good, I'll give you a 40% discount on this meal."

Chen Nuo laughed: "Then thanks, boss."

Seeing Chen Nuo was straightforward, the boss was quite happy and even gave them a bag of peanuts to snack on the road. It was just that in this day and age, there were no mobile phones that could take pictures. Otherwise, they would definitely have posed for a 'V' sign together.

After finishing the spicy garlic catfish, the two continued on their way.

On the road, Hearing Qi Yuntian mouth was swollen like a sausage, but he suddenly got into the mood to improvise a performance with Chen Nuo.

"Come on, Chen Nuo, now this is the Oscar stage. I'm the host, and I'm announcing that the winner of the 87th Oscar for Best Actor is~ Nuo Chen."

"Haha, I'm afraid I'll break character and laugh."

"Hahaha, no matter what, you have to thank me, you hear? Hurry, now it's your turn to go on stage and give your acceptance speech. Be serious. Otherwise, I'll fall out with you."

"Can't act it out..."

Qi Yuntian was about to say more when his phone suddenly rang.

Qi Yuntian picked it up. It seemed to be from some media outlet. The tone and manner of Hearing Qi Yuntian speech were unlike anything Chen Nuo had ever seen, his expression quite serious. He spoke in a crisp Beijing accent, both polite and pleasant, but if you listened carefully, he hadn't said anything and hadn't promised anything.

After hanging up, Qi Yuntian let out a breath and said: "Now let's unify our stance. Tell the outside world that you're going back to prepare for the Gaokao, that you don't plan to accept any more interviews in the near future, and that there are no filming plans. OK?"

Chen Nuo was, of course, OK.

But the media wasn't very OK. Until the two batteries in Hearing Qi Yuntian phone were completely dead—a full three hours—his phone hadn't stopped ringing. It seemed the CCTV interview broadcast earlier was some kind of starting pistol; now that the gun had fired, media outlets large and small were swarming in.

Qi Yuntian stopped halfway to buy a case of water. By the time they reached the entrance of the Shanghai Film Base, he had already drunk half of it.

The two sat in the car, looking at the crowd of people with all kinds of recording equipment at the base entrance, and couldn't help but stare at each other.

"Looks like the reporters all know you're here to film. What now?"

"……How about we just drive into them?"

(End of Chapter) ===== CHAPTER 54 =====