Chapter 153: How disgusting

Lin Xiuqing happened to be at the doorway, turning over the fish drying in the sun. Seeing Ye Yaodong return home with a piece of pig liver and a pig stomach, she asked in surprise, "Where did you buy those?"

"I didn't buy them. I got them from Fatty. His father-in-law sent over a pile of pig offal and told me to take some back."

"This pig stomach must weigh over three jin, right? How are we going to finish it all? Should we take it to Mother's place and have her stew it?"

"Sure, take it to her to prepare. Once it's stewed, we can go over and fill two bowls; it saves the trouble. We'll keep the pig liver; you should eat more of that."

"Okay."

Pig stomach is good for warming the stomach. The local way of cooking it is to stuff a small hen inside the stomach and stew it, which is called "pig stomach chicken."

Alternatively, the ends of the pig stomach are tied shut, a few farm-raised chicken eggs are cracked into the middle, and it's stewed with medicinal herbs. Once cooked, it's cut into rings with scissors and shared.

There were no small hens this time, so Ye Mu cracked eggs into the pig stomach. It had been many years since Ye Yaodong had eaten it this way; no one had bothered to organize it.

For dinner, they had a bowl of steamed fish, a bowl of stir-fried cabbage, and then the pig stomach soup.

Lin Xiuqing cooked the pig liver and spinach soup and set it aside, covering it to save for tomorrow. Otherwise, if the pig liver sat out overnight, it would go bad. If it was cooked and left there without being stirred, it wouldn't spoil.

After a satisfying meal, he helped look after the children for a while. Once it turned dark, Ye Yaodong planned to go out and stretch his muscles.

The three of them went straight to the vicinity of Xu Laifu's house. Whether they could catch him or not, they were idle anyway; it didn't matter if they just went out for a stroll to help digest their food.

A-Zheng had just gotten married and was currently inseparable from his wife; it wasn't convenient to disturb him late at night. A-Guang had to go out to sea at night, so they didn't call him either. It was just the three of them.

Xiao Xiao had the foresight to pull two bags of melon seeds out of his pocket.

Ye Yaodong chuckled as he took the paper-wrapped bundle from his hand. "You're quite well-prepared, bringing melon seeds along."

"It's because I was afraid of being bored. I passed by a small shop just now and bought two bags on the way. Instead of just waiting around, it's perfect to have two bags of seeds to crack."

"I wonder when this turtle's grandson will come out."

"If he's desperate to pee, he'll definitely just use a chamber pot in the room. You have to wait until he's desperate to poop."

"Won't we beat the crap out of him in a little while?"

"Do we have to be that brutal?"

"Then should we wait until he's finished pooping before we beat him?"

"Can you guys stop talking about poop? The melon seeds don't even taste good anymore."

"Don't you poop? The pig stomach you took away this afternoon is for holding pig poop!"

Ye Yaodong looked at the fat guy speechlessly, then moved two steps to the side and leaned against a large tree.

Fatty raised his eyebrows triumphantly.

"You dead fatty, can you not talk about it so disgustingly? I even ate stir-fried pork intestines for dinner." As Xiao Xiao spoke, he also moved closer to Ye Yaodong.

"Eating is eating, talking is talking. Eating, drinking, pooping, and peeing are life's major events! Great vulgarity is great elegance!"

The three of them babbled on while cracking melon seeds and chatting. Fortunately, it was only October, so it wasn't very cold yet.

"The seeds are finished. Let's go buy two more bags. If he still hasn't come out after we finish those, we'll each go home. We have to get up early on the first day of the lunar month to scour the sea. The tide goes out after 6 o'clock..."

"Shh—he's out, he's out. No need to buy more..."

The three of them looked down the slope and saw a figure limping along, walking with a hitch, looking left and right.

When they first arrived, they had deliberately chosen to stand on the high slope so they could see the bottom more clearly.

"At least the wait wasn't in vain."

"Eating, drinking, pooping, and peeing, he's bound to..."

"Shh—stop talking about eating, drinking, pooping, and peeing. Be quiet. He's only just stepped out of the house; don't scare him back in—"

The three of them sneaked along behind him, one below and three above, until they were almost at the outhouse.

Xiao Xiao: "He really did come out to solve a major life event."

Ye Yaodong: "Otherwise, did you think he was a mythical beast that only takes in and never puts out?"

Fatty: "Are we really going to guard here and wait for him to finish pooping!"

Ye Yaodong: "Otherwise what? Do you really want to beat the poop out of him?"

Xiao Xiao: "He's gone in. Why don't we go and scare him first? When he comes out pulling up his pants, we can just bag him in a sack?"

"It's so smelly..."

"Go on, it's not like you've never used an outhouse."

The outhouse at this time was just a small, low shack, worse than a pigsty. Below was a large pit, and inside, small white animals were wriggling around.

Above, a few wooden boards were simply laid down so people could stand on them. The front was covered only by a small curtain woven from straw, and a tiny bit of feet could still be seen from below.

If someone approached, they would know someone was inside, or the person inside would pretend to cough a few times to remind those outside that someone was in there.

The three of them whispered to each other as they walked down, "How should we scare him?"

Xiao Xiao said with a hint of triumph: "Watch me in a minute!"

"Okay, then we'll watch you."

Then, as he walked, he felt, why was he the only one left?

Turning his head, he saw that those two guys had stopped in their tracks right after he finished speaking!

Damn!

He frantically signaled with his eyes, telling them to move forward, but they just shook their heads without moving an inch! They even pursed their lips at him, urging him to hurry up!

Son of a bitch!

They had agreed to go together, and now the two of them were hiding in the back!

He glared until his eyes were almost blind, but the two of them still didn't move. It infuriated him!

Hearing the sound of pants being pulled up inside the pit, he had no choice but to go himself.

Silently clearing his throat, he used a shrill voice and pretended to cry there...

"Sob-sob-sob—I died so miserably—sob-sob-sob—return my life to me—"

Feeling the vibration of the wooden board, his confidence surged, and he continued to press on.

"Sob-sob-sob-sob~~ It's been hundreds of years~ I've finally found you~~ Brother Fu~~"

"Bang—"

"Thump—"

"Ah—help—blech—"

Hearing the commotion in the pit, Xiao Xiao jumped up in excitement, his heart shouting "holy crap" over and over, filled with exhilaration.

Ye Yaodong and Fatty also covered their noses and mouths in surprise and ran forward. Listening to the retching sounds coming from the pit from time to time, they all grinned silently, both giving Xiao Xiao a thumbs up.

This was just a small pit, not very large or deep. If someone fell in, they could still stand up and climb out.

Just then, they saw a hand reach out from the pit and heard the sound of him climbing up. They quickly ran back up the slope and squatted there, whispering.

"You're really something, you actually scared him into falling into the pit?"

"It's just that he's a coward, can't take a scare, really useless, a weakling."

"That's why it's called a guilty conscience!"

"Blech—so disgusting..."

Seeing him climb out of the pit with a bruised face, his body covered in wriggling white worms, while he jumped around retching as if trying to shake off the disgusting things on him...

The three of them shuddered in disgust, yet they watched with great interest, not even blinking.

Xu Laifu was also disgusted with himself. Looking at the things hanging on his body, he felt like dying.

He also suspected that someone had deliberately scared him just now, but he looked left and right and there was no one anywhere. His body was so disgusting that he could only limp home while retching.

The three of them looked at the puddle of disgusting unidentified matter on the ground in front of the pit, as well as the liquid dripping from his body along the way and the footprints with marks, their faces full of disgust.

Xiao Xiao: "Should we not beat him? It's too disgusting."

Fatty: "Who would dare to touch him?"

"Damn, I've got goosebumps all over. It's too damn disgusting, I almost threw up."

As Ye Yaodong spoke, he shuddered again. Fortunately, he had prepared a chamber pot at the back door of his new house, so he didn't need to go to the outhouse, nor did he need to go through the trouble of carrying it to the manure pit to dump it. It was perfect to just use it mixed with water as fertilizer for the vegetable garden.

"Tonight's experience will probably be unforgettable for him for the rest of his life!"

"I'm never going to the outhouse again. With my tonnage, I'm so afraid that I'll accidentally end up like him!"

Ye Yaodong looked up and down at his physique. He really did need to visit his house often!

"You be careful! You've been using the toilet for so many years without falling in, you're quite lucky. If your weight goes up any more, the wooden boards won't be able to bear your weight."

"I have to tell my wife to buy a big chamber pot! At worst, I'll just be more diligent about dumping it."

Xiao Xiao stretched his neck to look at the figure in the distance, which was only a tiny speck. "Should we follow him?"

"Go, go, go. We're idle anyway, why not follow and see?"

"Mommy, tonight's experience really hit the spot!"

"You're really a pervert!"

"Likewise!"

The three of them followed Xu Laifu with great interest, keeping a long distance from him to avoid any soul-stirring, pungent odors drifting into their noses...

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Following him to the slope position of his house, they stopped and squatted there, pricking up their ears to listen.

"What's that smell?"

"I smell it too?"

"Did someone tip over their room's chamber pot?"

Before long, the lights in the entire Xu house turned on. Xu Mu was cursing and swearing, knocking on every room to ask, only to find that her youngest son was not in his room, and there were some unidentified liquids and stains on the floor of the main hall.

She squatted down to smell it, and her whole face immediately wrinkled up. Her mouth kept opening and closing as she cursed...

The three of them squatted on the hillside, watching with great interest through his house window...

Before long, Xu Mu heard the sound of water at the back door. She opened the door and took one look, immediately waving her hands in front of her nose and mouth in disgust, wanting to drive away the disgusting smell.

"What are you doing? What's that smell?"

"Mother, I didn't mean to!"

How could he not mean to?

She stared forward and took a closer look, immediately feeling even more disgusted. There were actually worms wriggling on his body?

"Did you fall into the pit? Are you an idiot? You actually walked home? There are marks everywhere, you fool..."

Xu Mu scolded him severely and ordered him to wash clean before he could enter the house, then went in to clean the floor...

The three of them didn't pat their butts and stand up in satisfaction until they had finished watching the whole farce.

"Tonight was really not a wasted trip!"

"Laughing to death. Tomorrow, the people who go to the outhouse will see the filth all over the ground around it and will have to curse again."

"Disgusting to death, hurry home, wash up, and sleep."

Seeing him return late again today with a bright smile on his face, Lin Xiuqing couldn't help but lower her voice and ask: "Did you pick up money? Why are you so happy?"

"Something happier than picking up money?"

With a face full of smiles, he told her what happened that night, and Lin Xiuqing was speechless.

"You guys are really vicious! Falling into a pit is much more uncomfortable than getting a beating."

"Haha, that's because he's a coward himself, it has nothing to do with us. We didn't even move a finger on him, laughing to death."

"Don't laugh, don't wake the children, hurry up and wash your hands and feet and go to sleep."

Ye Yaodong happily complied.