Chapter 1511

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Protagonist:

Li Xiulan

Niu Linxin was still crying, but Niu Chunsheng had already noticed Li Xiulan's arrival.

"Xiulan, you're here..."

A glimmer of light suddenly returned to Niu Chunsheng's dull, lifeless eyes.

Niu Linxin looked back and hurriedly wiped her tears; what she saw was Wang Xiaohua:

"Brother Xiaohua! How did you all come?"

Wang Xiaoqian also hurriedly called out: "Brother Xiaohua!"

Wang Xiaohua said to Niu Linxin:

"We came to see your dad."

He was a bit surprised:

"Xiaoqian, didn't expect you to be here too."

Wang Xiaoqian said:

"I accompanied Lin Xin over."

Seeing Niu Chunsheng like this, Li Xiulan couldn't help but sigh with emotion.

The Niu Chunsheng in her memory still remained in that era of youthful vigor.

How, in the blink of an eye, had he become so sickly?

"Chunsheng, you... are you alright...?"

Li Xiulan didn't know what to say; even her greeting was a bit stiff.

It wasn't that she didn't want to, but too many emotions were blocked in her throat, making it hard to speak.

"Not bad, won't die for a while yet."

Niu Chunsheng forced out a smile.

This man, all his life in front of outsiders, had always cut a fine figure.

In front of Li Xiulan, even more so, he had never left any wretched image.

So naturally at this time he also didn't want to reveal his fragile side.

"Lin Xin, you and Xiaoqian, and the three brothers Dashan, Erhai, and Xiaohua, why don't you go outside for a walk? I have some words I want to say to Xiulan alone."

Niu Linxin knew her father wanted to send her away and be alone with Li Xiulan.

In the past she would definitely have complaints, but now she didn't want to say anything anymore; she only wanted her father to be healthy and safe.

So she obediently listened and left the ward together with the three Wang brothers and Wang Xiaoqian.

After the whole group of young people left, only Niu Chunsheng and Li Xiulan remained in the ward.

Li Xiulan was a bit restrained; she actually didn't want to be alone with Niu Chunsheng, afraid it would cause misunderstandings again.

After all, she had experienced Lin Xiaofang's fierceness.

Niu Chunsheng hurriedly said to Li Xiulan:

"Xiulan, sit. The environment is just like this, nothing much to entertain you with."

Li Xiulan sat on a chair by the hospital bed, looking at Niu Chunsheng's face so thin it was almost unrecognizable, and for a moment didn't know what to say.

After a long while, she finally squeezed out a sentence:

"You must take care of your own body, don't just focus on earning money and lose your health."

Niu Chunsheng said:

"You're right, this thing called health, you only know it's important when you get sick."

"What about your wife?" Li Xiulan asked carefully, "How come she didn't come?"

"She's not used to staying here, and the son is still small, still needs looking after, so she went back."

Niu Chunsheng smiled, his face bearing a bitterness he couldn't hide.

Li Xiulan couldn't help but say:

"You're so seriously ill, how can she be at ease? When my husband was sick, it was me taking care of him."

"Do you dislike it?" Niu Chunsheng asked.

"Dislike what?" Li Xiulan didn't understand.

"He's sick and you don't dislike it? Still willing to take care of him?"

Li Xiulan said:

"What dislike or not dislike, we've just made do and lived a lifetime together, no matter what you say he's still my husband."

Hearing this, Niu Chunsheng's nose soured.

What this world fears most is comparison.

But people at their most vulnerable often can't help but compare.

Women are like this, men are also like this.

At this moment, Li Xiulan's sense of responsibility and Lin Xiaofang's fear and retreat stood before his eyes like black and white, a stark and dazzling contrast.

But very quickly he let it go.

Because when he was first diagnosed with cancer, he wanted to divorce Lin Xiaofang.

And he had already submitted the application; as long as the divorce cooling-off period passed, the procedures could be finalized.

"Xiulan, I actually have something I've kept in my heart for a long time, always wanted to ask you, but never managed to ask it out loud. If I ask now, will you answer me honestly?"

Niu Chunsheng looked at Li Xiulan, his gaze carrying a plea.

Li Xiulan asked:

"What is it?"

Niu Chunsheng said:

"If, I mean if, if time turned back twenty-plus years, back when we were running the small shop together in Shangou Village, if I had confessed to you then, would you have agreed?"

Li Xiulan was stunned.

Her inner heart trembled slightly.

As if struck by something.

This question, she had actually thought about it earlier than Niu Chunsheng.

And not just a little earlier, but over ten years earlier.

Especially when she learned Wang Zhanggen had another woman outside, was irresponsible toward the family, and she had to shoulder everything alone.

She didn't think about this for a day or two, but day and night, crazily.

If she had been more resolute back then, before Lin Xiaofang appeared, and rushed to Niu Chunsheng without regard for anything, would her life have been different?

But later, she didn't know when.

She couldn't even remember that turning point anymore.

Anyway, she suddenly didn't want to think about this question anymore.

She accepted everything.

Accepted the fact that Niu Chunsheng and Lin Xiaofang were together.

Also accepted the fact that Wang Zhanggen didn't love her.

Then she just persisted day after day, from the prime of youth all the way to old age and fading beauty, persisted until three sons grew up, persisted until Wang Zhanggen passed away.

Although Wang Zhanggen was her husband, the biological father of three children, she still had to admit one thing: ever since Wang Zhanggen died, her life got much better, she felt the world was much wider. At her eldest son's place, taking care of her grandson every day, cooking and cleaning, days passed quite fulfillingly too.

She never found the answer to that question in her lifetime, but now she no longer thinks about it, and doesn't need to think about it.

Some things, once missed, can never come back.

"I don't know."

Li Xiulan fell silent for a long while, only then giving her answer.

She truly didn't know.

She hadn't thought about love and romance for a long time. As for why she felt worry upon hearing Niu Chunsheng was sick last night, that was purely out of concern for a friend of many years.

Niu Chunsheng couldn't help but stare blankly, his face showing surprise.

He had originally thought Li Xiulan would say if she returned to the past, she would be willing to be with him.

After all, Li Xiulan had suffered too much hardship in this life.

If she started over, she shouldn't want to suffer those hardships again.

And following him, Niu Chunsheng, she wouldn't have to suffer those hardships.

Unexpectedly, Li Xiulan was in a trance for a long time, yet gave the answer "I don't know."

"Xiulan, did you ever have... for me..." Niu Chunsheng wouldn't give up.

But Li Xiulan cut off his words:

"Chunsheng, we're both old now, discussing these things has no meaning anymore."

Niu Chunsheng couldn't help feeling a bit lost, smiling bitterly:

"Right, right..."

At this moment Li Xiulan instead answered him openly and generously:

"To tell you the truth, back when we ran the shop together, I did have a good impression of you, but because of the children, because of the family, I hesitated, and I was also afraid you wouldn't accept my three sons. Following you would certainly mean less suffering, but my three sons definitely wouldn't be like they are now. Perhaps everything was the best choice after all."

Li Xiulan thought, Niu Chunsheng couldn't even educate his own daughter well, let alone educate someone else's children.

She didn't know if she would have agreed to Niu Chunsheng if she went back to that year, but she was very certain: if she had agreed, her eldest son couldn't have married Du Xiaojuan, her second son couldn't have become a boss in the county town, her third son couldn't have tested into Tsinghua University.

So from the perspective of her three sons, she should be unwilling.

The main thing is, back then Niu Chunsheng, from beginning to end, never opened his mouth to her about that.

Not even a hint.