Chapter 1: Liu Bian

"Liu Bian, it's been so long and you still haven't finished this program. Don't bother coming in tomorrow. And don't even think about getting this month's salary — the company doesn't keep useless people around!"

In a finely decorated office, a big-bellied, balding middle-aged man of about forty glared viciously and roared at a clean-cut, well-built youth standing before him.

"Manager Wang, please give me one more chance. The main thing is, this assignment was just too much, and the deadline was too tight. If I work overtime, I'll definitely finish it before the end of the day!"

Liu Bian held back the anger in his heart and pleaded softly with the fat man.

"Get lost! A useless piece of trash like you — I've wanted to fire you ages ago, why would I keep you around? If you know what's good for you, get out on your own right now. Otherwise, I'll have security throw you out!"

The fat man paid no heed to Liu Bian's pleas and, full of arrogance, berated him harshly.

Liu Bian walked out of the manager's office in a daze, quietly returned to his seat, and began packing up his things.

"Liu Bian, did Fatty Wang give you trouble again?"

A coworker asked with concern written all over his face.

"That damn fatty is so black-hearted — all he knows is squeezing us dry! He's only putting on airs because he's the boss's brother-in-law!"

At these words, the whole office began buzzing with discussion, each person venting their dissatisfaction with Fatty Wang — a clear sign of just how unpopular he was.

"It's nothing — even if I got fired, I've come to terms with it. Here, no matter how well I do, Fatty Wang will always bully me. Better to find a new work environment. With my credentials as a graduate of a 211 university, I refuse to believe I can't survive without that Fatty Wang!"

Liu Bian pushed down his dejected feelings and forced a smile for his coworkers.

That night, Liu Bian found a barbecue stall, ate some skewers, drank some beer, and planned to relax properly — a reward for all his hard work lately.

Wandering through the neon-lit streets of the city, Liu Bian was pondering his plans for the future, when he happened to see a beautiful woman darting across the road, just as a car coming from the opposite side was about to hit her.

Liu Bian, without knowing why, had some kind of brain spasm and rushed forward to push the woman aside. Then, with a screech of car brakes, he felt his whole body lift into the air:

"Shit, I'm done for this time. I've lived this long and I'm still a virgin — I've never even held a girl's hand!"

In his panic, this was Liu Bian's final thought, and then his consciousness sank into darkness.

The late Eastern Han — an era of outstanding talents and warring Marquises vying for hegemony, an era of unbearable suffering for the common people. The Han Empire, having weathered four hundred years of storms, had entered its final, darkest chapter.

Since the April of the sixth year of Zhongping (189 AD), after Han Ling Emperor Liu Hong passed away, Han Shao Emperor Liu Bian—

—having ascended the throne with the support of Grand General He Jin and Empress Dowager He Lian and others, and being still a child, had Empress Dowager He Lian rule from behind the curtain, while Grand General He Jin presided over court affairs.

At the same time, another faction within the Imperial Palace — the eunuchs led by Zhang Rang and the Ten Attendants — seeing He Jin's growing power and fearing a threat to themselves, immediately engaged in fierce clashes with the aristocratic faction led by He Jin.

In the end, the Ten Attendants lured He Jin into the palace and took the chance to assassinate him. Meanwhile, He Jin, following Colonel Yuan Shao's counsel, had summoned Xiliang Army's Dong Zhuo and Bing Province Inspector Ding Yuan to come to the capital to rescue the emperor.

Unfortunately, He Jin lost his life to his own arrogance before Dong Zhuo and the others could arrive.

The Ten Attendants and the other eunuchs, upon hearing that Dong Zhuo and Ding Yuan were entering the capital, took Han Shao Emperor Liu Bian and the others and began to flee.

Later, by the Yellow River, they were discovered by Dong Zhuo. Dong Zhuo killed the Ten Attendants and the others, welcomed back Han Shao Emperor Liu Bian, and took control of the imperial capital Luoyang.

At the same time, Bing Province Inspector Ding Yuan also arrived in Luoyang shortly after and confronted Dong Zhuo's army. Dong Zhuo adopted the stratagem of his adviser Li Ru, using the prized steed Red Hare as the price to buy over Ding Yuan's adopted son Lü Bu.

After being bought by Dong Zhuo, Lü Bu killed Ding Yuan, ordered his trusted men to take command of fifty thousand Bing Province Wolf Cavalry, and brought them under Dong Zhuo's banner.

From then on, Dong Zhuo, with the price of a single Red Hare, took Ding Yuan and his army without shedding a drop of blood, becoming the most powerful faction at the time.

From that point on, the Eastern Han's imperial capital Luoyang fell into the hands of Dong Zhuo and his Xiliang Army. Dong Zhuo and his men took control of Han Shao Emperor Liu Bian and proclaimed themselves Prime Minister of a Commandery.

Thereafter, Dong Zhuo began to live in extravagant debauchery, spending his nights on the Dragon Bed, running rampant through the Imperial Palace. The entire imperial capital Luoyang was ruled by Dong Zhuo's tyranny.

In the third month of 190 AD, Liu Bian sat on the resplendent Dragon Throne in utter disbelief, looking at his own arm — it was a pair of fair, slender hands belonging to a youth.

"Hahaha, I'm not dead! No, wait — I must have been reborn. Look at how the original owner dressed — he's even an emperor. Woo-hoo, I'm taking off! I want to wake and hold power over Tian Xia, and lie drunk in the lap of beauties!" Liu Bian foolishly fantasized about the wonderful life to come, a glistening liquid trickling from the corner of his mouth. Hiss — my head hurts!

Immediately, a flood of unfamiliar memories poured into his mind. After sorting through the memories in his head, the expression on his face gradually froze.

"Holy fucking shit, I'm cracking up. What kind of joke is this? I've actually been reborn as the short-lived emperor from history — Han Shao Emperor, Liu Bian."

"I knew it — good people get no reward. Damn, fine if I'm reborn, but couldn't you let me be reborn as some badass character? Why did I have to become Liu Bian? I thought it was some awesome emperor — how did it turn into Han Shao Emperor Liu Bian?"

Liu Bian sat on the Dragon Throne, thinking nonstop.

"The third month of 190 AD — isn't this exactly the time in history when Dong Zhuo's army arrived at Luoyang, the most desolate and darkest moment for the Han Empire? And according to the historical records, Han Shao Emperor Liu Bian was also deposed by Dong Zhuo on some pretext and then poisoned to death in this very year."

From the memories in Liu Bian's mind, he knew the current time period very clearly.

Moreover, after the national traitor Dong Zhuo entered Luoyang, he used Red Hare to buy over the Three Kingdoms' number-one warrior Lü Bu, and took the fifty thousand Bing Province Army from Ding Yuan's hands.

Now he had proclaimed himself Prime Minister of a Commandery, and was currently commanding all the officials and presiding over court affairs. He, the Han emperor, had been completely sidelined by Dong Zhuo.

Thinking of this, Liu Bian felt another wave of sorrow.

"This is a guaranteed-death opening. No solution at all."

"A powerless, friendless puppet emperor like me doesn't have long to live."

"Enough. The die is cast now, there's no turning back. Since I'm here, I might as well make the best of it."

But thinking of the looming crisis, Liu Bian felt a wave of frustration and helplessness. Was he really supposed to just sit and wait for Dong Zhuo to poison him?

Creak!

Suddenly, the doors of the Grand Hall were thrown open, and a procession of people came into Liu Bian's view. At their head was a middle-aged man in a long scholar's robe, thin and frail of build, with a sinister, vicious look in his eyes that gave off a very treacherous air.

Seeing the newcomer, Liu Bian knew who it was from the memories in his mind.

Dong Zhuo's top strategist, his confidant and son-in-law — Li Ru.