Chapter 131: Section 15: The Memorial

"Of course." Wu Mu and the two Embroidered Uniform Guard officers answered in unison, their tone so firm it brooked no doubt.

"One against eight? Would the my lords at court believe that?" Huang Shi found the number utterly insane — in one breath, the three of them had multiplied the enemy tenfold.

Wu Mu cleared his throat and spoke with righteous conviction, without the slightest trace of shame: "Of course. Six thousand Jianzhou slaves, routed in one blow by General Huang. I and these two Embroidered Uniform Guard brothers all witnessed it with our own eyes."

Though the two Embroidered Uniform Guard officers said nothing, their faces were full of sympathetic agreement, which made Huang Shi feel it necessary to give them a basic lesson in military intelligence.

"Eunuch Wu, Brother Chen, Brother Zhang. Liaonan is held by the Jianzhou slaves' Two Red Banners. Those two banners together have only five thousand battle troops and just over ten thousand auxiliary troops. Moreover, they could not possibly all be gathered here, and there was the battle at Lushun before this. Six thousand Jianzhou slaves is far too many — it is impossible for that number to appear on such a small battlefield."

The two Embroidered Uniform Guard officers wore expressions that said, "So what?" But with Wu Mu, the Army Supervisor, present, it was not their place to speak, so they still said nothing.

"How could there not be six thousand? The Jianzhou slaves, like the western barbarians, are all cavalry. Am I right, General Huang?"

"That is true, but—"

"General Huang, just tell me: am I right or not?"

"Right."

"There, that settles it. When our Great Ming fights the western barbarians, taking heads at half a tenth is already a great victory. They ride horses and can flee. With these five hundred heads, saying I routed six thousand Jianzhou slaves is already understating it."

"At court..." Huang Shi still wanted to object. He believed that defeating an enemy eight times your number in field battle could only happen between government troops and roving bandits, not between regular armies.

Wu Mu shot back with aggressive force: "With those five hundred heads, who would not believe it? And who would dare not believe it?"

Seeing Huang Shi's worried expression, Wu Mu's face showed pity. Zhang Gaosheng, his face even more wretched, sighed with feeling: "Having witnessed General Huang's martial prowess, I had always wondered why General Huang was only an Assistant Regional Commander. Now I finally understand."

Once this topic was raised, Wu Mu and Chen Ruike both wore expressions of utter indignation, shaking their heads and heaving great sighs: "Too unfair. This is truly too unfair."

Having just vented his dissatisfaction over Huang Shi's lowly status, Wu Mu once again brandished the authority of the Army Supervisor: "General Huang need say no more. The memorial is for me to decide. General Huang need only remember it firmly... Private Secretary, continue reading."

"Of the eight hundred officers and men under my command, over a hundred perished in this battle, and every survivor bears wounds..."

Over a hundred dead? That's not right — clearly only one died. Isn't this just splashing dirty water on your own face? Huang Shi immediately voiced his objection again: "Eunuch Wu, we did not lose that many men."

"Yes, I saw it with my own eyes. But if we report it truthfully, who would believe it?"

An agitated Wu Mu abruptly rose to his feet and looked left and right. Both Embroidered Uniform Guard officers looked up at him. Wu Mu flung out his sleeve and pointed at Chen Ruike: "Five hundred heads taken, and only one soldier dead. Would you believe it?"

Chen Ruike hastily shook his head, his face full of earnestness: "I would not believe it. I would not."

Wu Mu turned back around, his finger nearly poking Zhang Gaosheng's nose, and pressed him in a shrill voice: "And you?"

Zhang Gaosheng let out a hearty, resonant laugh, as if he had just heard the most ridiculous story in the world: "Had I not seen it with my own eyes, I would not believe it even if it killed me."

Wu Mu smiled with satisfaction, sat back down cross-legged, and spread both hands elegantly on his legs: "Both of them are here today. Even now, as I recall the events of the day, I can scarcely believe them. If the memorial is written like this, who would believe it? What do you say, General Huang?"

Seeing that Huang Shi had been persuaded, Wu Mu had the private secretary read line by line, and after each line he explained it.

"...'Every man bears wounds' — this speaks to General Huang's hardship. Besides, routing six thousand Jianzhou slaves without every man bearing wounds — no one would believe it either."

"...Saying that some soldiers fled and were executed on the spot by General Huang — this also shows that General Huang's victory did not come easily..."

This time Huang Shi did not intend to compromise: "Eunuch Wu, I painstakingly trained these fine soldiers, and they truly did not flee. Saying this — isn't that the same as saying I did not train my troops well?"

Wu Mu sighed repeatedly, not knowing whether to laugh or cry. Chen Ruike leaned forward to explain: "Grandfather Yue Wumu said: 'He who can take the field, hold his spear steady, and still have spittle in his mouth is a good soldier.' General Huang's troops faced eight times their number of Jianzhou slaves, and not a single man fled in battle — no one would believe that!"

"Brother Chen, Grandfather Yue was speaking of new recruits. Only new recruits cannot hold their spears steady and their mouths go dry the moment they enter battle. More than half of my troops are veterans. The new recruits were all in the rear ranks, drilled for a long time and led by veterans."

Chen Ruike glanced back at Wu Mu. Wu Mu was already so pained he could not speak, so Chen had no choice but to continue explaining: "They are new recruits. Having new recruits makes the merit even greater. For such a great victory, even if General Huang said a hundred men fled, everyone would still raise a thumb and say the General trained his troops well."

Wu Mu had finally caught his breath: "General Huang, you must make the imperial court feel the weight of your achievement and understand your hardship!"

How absurd! Huang Shi did not know whether he was absurd or the memorial was absurd, but he compromised once again.

"...General Huang, though wounded six times, still fought fiercely to kill the enemy, and at last routed the Jianzhou slaves in one blow, pursuing them for over thirty li and taking four hundred and sixty-seven heads."

Having finished outlining his concept, Wu Mu cast a smug look at Chen Ruike. Huang Shi watched as Chen pulled a rabbit out of a bamboo crate. At that moment, Wu Mu drew a large piece of cloth from his bosom, and Huang Shi immediately recognized it as the cloth he had sent Chen Ruike to tear from the battlefield.

"The wounds, of course, will not be written in the memorial. As for this..." Wu Mu, perfectly composed, placed the cloth on the ground and rubbed it, then wadded it into a ball and kneaded it for a long time before opening it again.

Chen Ruike had already strangled the rabbit. Zhang Gaosheng, with perfect coordination, drew his knife and cut a gash in the rabbit's leg, then carefully presented it to Wu Mu.

"I hear General Huang can write, is that right?" As he spoke, Wu Mu took the rabbit and carefully dripped a little blood onto the cloth, meticulously controlling the shape of the bloodstains.

"Yes, I can write a few characters."

"Excellent," Wu Mu said, wholly absorbed in handling the cloth, continuing without looking up: "After today's great victory, General Huang, overcome with emotion, tore this cloth from a Jianzhou slave's corpse, dipped it in his blood, and began writing a memorial, desperate to report this good news to His Majesty!"