Chapter 184: The Life of a Hedgehog

Your thought process is extremely erratic

One moment they were talking about a nuclear explosion, the next, Old Fuli blurted out that he wanted to buy a house in a metropolis—suddenly, the slightly tense atmosphere loosened a bit

Grandmother Hedgehog's eyelid twitched; she could no longer maintain her sexy, commanding demeanor and muttered under her breath:

"Modern communication is advanced; humans are unlikely to be as wild as they once were, but their equipment keeps evolving. Now, when they capture spirit beasts in the wild, they use mouse glue to stick them, then knock them unconscious with physical or chemical methods before packaging them."

"You don't want to be covered in sticky glue and then get your fur shaved off in some research lab, do you?"

The golden-edged hedgehog spoke slowly, recounting to Fuli the glorious past of humanity

Demons and monsters, right?

Lure them into remote wastelands and detonate them—the light of materialist science dispels feudal superstition, and meanwhile, they can use those demons and monsters to test the aftereffects of new equipment on carbon-based lifeforms

The golden-edged hedgehog was born in the Xi Xi Desert; after witnessing certain things, it packed its bags overnight and sneaked from Xi Xi to Xi Dong, far away from those scientists muttering about smashing superstition

As times progressed, archaeology unearthed certain artifacts, and biology made advances

Creatures humans couldn't understand gradually shed their labels as demons and monsters and were officially recognized—they no longer needed to be shot

In the golden-edged hedgehog's era, a creature like Fuli would've been tricked out of the city and blown up by a mortar

Any spirit beast that had studied even a few years knew how martially formidable the people of Xi had once been

"Let them stick whoever they want—it has nothing to do with me. Honestly, I haven't even applied for my bravery reward from them yet!"

After hearing the golden-edged hedgehog's words, An Sheng stared at it with a blackened face: "Don't go spouting nonsense like that."

What the golden-edged hedgehog said was terrifying enough to shake the fox

An Sheng couldn't help but sink into thought, imagining himself being vaporized by a nuclear blast in his little mind

But An Sheng quickly snapped back—what the hell, if a spirit beast gets nuked, what's it got to do with him?

When you came here, didn't you even bother to ask what kind of business Old Fuli of Zhangxizhen runs?

I, An, specialize in quelling spirit beast disturbances and granting wishes—my reputation among peers is universally praised: 【Xi Dong Dora Fox Dreams】

You'd nuke me, the mighty Dora Fox Dreams?

"I'm on the government payroll—unlike you tax-evading freelancers. You nearly led me into a dead-end with that nonsense, you golden-edged giant hamster," An Sheng bluntly scolded the golden-edged hamster

I get two hundred yuan monthly welfare from Su Qiyuan just for living expenses—even without passing the civil service exam or being promoted to Director of the Spirit Beast Prevention Office, I'm still on the official whitelist

Wait, you, a tax-evading freelancer, really think it's appropriate to lecture me, a law-abiding citizen?

"Golden-edged giant hamster?"

Hearing Fuli's insult, Grandmother Hedgehog's fair cheeks froze; her lips twitched slightly—was she really being called a hamster now? Who did that?

Back when I still had spines, my grandkids worshipped me like the sun!

"Don't meddle in fox affairs—anyone who gets hit by my fist is someone who defies the fox's authority," An Sheng waved his hand casually. "Just get the stuff ready. I said I'd come by last night, but something came up—I'll pick it up tonight."

"By the way, aren't you guys loaded with younger brothers?"

"Please watch your wording, Old Fuli—we've never employed 'younger brothers.' They're all security personnel dispatched by labor agencies," Grandmother Hedgehog corrected his improper phrasing

"Who cares about semantics? Like anyone else can hear us. Anyway, help me out—there might be spirit beasts coming after me for revenge. When I need it, cover for me while I smash them to pieces."

A pure white fox and a large hedgehog with white fur streaked with golden hairs sat facing each other

The fox murmured softly; the golden-edged hedgehog chirped a few times in response, while beside them, the human occasionally stepped forward to light a cigarette for the hedgehog and hand it fruit—the scene was deeply bizarre

Yet none of the "younger brothers" present laughed; all wore solemn expressions, guarding the perimeter tightly, terrified any tourist might disturb the two 'Masters' in every sense

When the conversation ended

The younger brother who had been holding an umbrella under the sunshade closed it, sat across from them, and, having just poured tea for Yu Xueqing, Lin Hao received a signal and smiled at her:

"Sorry, our White Immortal needs to use the restroom due to physiological reasons—I'll go with him."

Ordinary hedgehogs are famously lacking in restraint—chewing food in their mouths while defecating wildly is perfectly normal

Lin Hao seized the opening, returned to his grandmother's side, rolled up his sleeves, and helped her and the younger brother leave

Meanwhile, Yu Xueqing and the livestream audience all sat with jaws dropped

Yu Xueqing hadn't turned off the livestream, worried Lin Hao had ill intentions—and also worried she might overreact

Lin Hao knew Yu Xueqing was livestreaming, but since they'd only discussed cute pets, he hadn't cared

"Phew—"

Yu Xueqing watched Lin Hao's back and saw the hedgehog's tiny paw holding a cigarette, extending it toward the cutting board; beside it, a young man in a black suit bowed respectfully, pulling out a disposable ashtray. The golden-edged hedgehog tapped the ash, then brought the cigarette to its mouth, exhaling smoke

Yu Xueqing's gaze went blank; she turned to the lonely little figure sitting alone at the tea table—Xiang Xiaoan—and felt a pang of sorrow in her chest

"Xiang Xiaoan… is so pitiful."

【Such a stark contrast! The teahouse's junior attendant versus the group's billionaire heiress.】

【F***! All my hard-earned salary doesn't cover the hedgehog's weekly electricity bill!】

Lin Hao discussed pet-rearing tips with Yu Xueqing

The livestream audience gained a deep insight into the superstition and wealth of Xi Dong residents

In Lin Hao's account, Grandmother Hedgehog was a 【Immortal】 passed down through his family

His grandfather, nearly starved to death and collapsed by the river, was passed by a hedgehog with fruit stuck to its back—he ate the fruit, grateful for the hedgehog's life-saving act, and kidnapped the little creature

Since then, their family prospered

This golden-edged hedgehog is the descendant of the one who saved them; now, it is the seventeenth generation

The golden-edged hedgehog is the purest bloodline; the Lin family reveres it as an Immortal

Even in marriage, they prioritize partners from regions that revere hedgehogs as 【White Immortals】

Lin Hao wasn't lying here—when his relatives married, they either chose locals or people from Xi Bei. Grandmother Hedgehog's dignity could not be offended; even a native of Hao Village who disrespected her would be expelled from the family tree and forced to fend for themselves

Grandmother Hedgehog is a symbol of wealth, the true goldmine of Hao Village

Grandmother Hedgehog's electricity bill is nearly eight thousand yuan per day

One heated swimming pool costs eight hundred yuan alone—add in the temperature-controlled wine cellar and other property expenses—it's insane

Yu Xueqing and the livestream audience were speechless

Same cute pets—think of Grandmother Hedgehog, then think of Fuli, living on eight yuan a day

Yu Xueqing felt nothing but sorrow

(End of Chapter)