Chapter 493: Return

That evening, I took off from Bailian Airport, landed at Shanghai Hongqiao Airport, and then took the airport bus back to Hangzhou from Shanghai.

In the restroom at Hongqiao Airport, I saw my face. The mask skillfully avoided all the places where I would grow a beard; otherwise my beard would now be growing into my flesh against the mask. I used to think that having a little beard would make me look more manly, but now it seems not everyone is suited for a beard, especially this old face full of stubble, plus the ill-fitting clothes—looking like some style icon from the scavenging world.

Xiao Hua told me that in ancient China, people who wore this kind of mask had to use a medicinal solution to destroy all the pores on their face, a very painful process. Not being able to grow a beard isn't particularly tragic for someone like me, but I'm still glad they didn't do that.

That was the last bus. On the bus, there were only me and a girl who looked like a student. She kept her earphones on, staring out the window with a dazed expression. She had a braid, looked very clean, and had a very special temperament.

I couldn't help but think of Yuncai again, the feeling in my heart indescribable. From the moment I set out from Guangxi, I had been keeping my emotions tight, but now, watching the streetlights flash by, the various pains filling my heart began to leak out bit by bit.

I closed my eyes, trying not to cry. Fatty's wailing still echoed in my ears. I thought of that painting of Yuncai, the one with us in it—the first time we went to Banai. Although our hearts were full of mysteries, we looked happy, because at that time, fate was still in our own hands.

Ironically, everything we did afterward was to deliver the fate we held in our hands entirely into the current situation.

What fear still remained in my heart? Even in such an emotional state, I felt that none of my inner entanglements had eased.

My inner demon had not faded. Or rather, this time I came back, I didn't even think of it as an end. I deeply knew that I was just returning as a passerby; things were not over, but rather continuing without pause.

The bus's terminal was at Kaixuan Road. I got off and took a taxi home. It was already midnight. Looking at the familiar streets, I compared it to my previous returns to Hangzhou. Those times, my first feeling upon returning to Hangzhou was exhaustion: never go to such places again, this time would definitely be the last. That was a common thought back then.

But not this time. I wasn't exhausted. I even had a feeling of 'it's just so-so.'

"If this keeps up, you'll be critically ill."

So be it, then. I lit a cigarette, got out of the car, and looked at everything in front of me, suddenly stunned.

In front of me was Third Uncle's shop.

Wasn't I supposed to go home? I was a little dazed, and suddenly remembered that the address I gave the driver when I got in was Third Uncle's home.

I couldn't go back to my own home. Even when I returned to Hangzhou, I had to stay here.

I turned around; the taxi had already driven off. Standing in the dark alley, I found it funny. I took out the key Panzi had given me earlier, walked to the iron gate, took a breath, and opened it.

The entire small villa had no lights. I walked into the courtyard and saw Third Uncle's potted plants. Thanks to a gardener, the plants were growing very well, scattered around haphazardly. Third Uncle's usual tea table was set in the middle of the yard.

This was where Third Uncle usually lived. I had stayed here for a few days before, but I never expected that this time I would return to this very place.

I didn't immediately go inside, because I didn't know what I would do inside. I didn't want to wander around in such a house at this hour. For some reason, I resisted the life that awaited me. The later it started, the better. I sat down on the tea chair, wrapped my clothes tighter, and stared at the night sky, motionless, until dawn.

It was the gardener who came daily who woke me up: when I opened my eyes, a face was looking at me with a puzzled expression.

"Boss, you're back? Why are you sleeping here?"

"Uncle He?" I replied groggily, then immediately realized my mistake and corrected myself, "Old He, you're here so early?"

"Better go inside the house. It's cold, boss," Old He said. I nodded and looked inside. The hourly worker hadn't arrived yet. Third Uncle had an hourly cleaner come every day, but only for the third floor. The second and first floors were where goods were stored.

Most people who deal in antiques don't like particularly clean or modern interior designs. Generally, antique dealers like to display things in a cluttered manner. This is to satisfy the customer's psychology: picking goods from a mess of antiques feels more reassuring. Many regional antique shops like to throw antiques on the floor to sell, for the same reason. If it were done like a jewelry store with salesclerks in suits, it would actually look unprofessional. In fact, if everyone really understood antiques, it would be fine, but the truth is that real collectors who understand antiques are too few. In this business, ninety-nine percent of the people we meet every year are complete laymen pretending to be experts. These buyers care a lot about the 'feeling.'

I skirted around these antiques, passed through several security doors, and reached the third floor. The things on the first floor were not valuable. The second floor had a safe with slightly better items. The truly good stuff, when the shop wasn't open, was kept in Third Uncle's secret room on the third floor. The security doors on the third floor looked shabby, but they were actually made of tungsten steel, with locks designed by an old locksmith Third Uncle had hired. The mechanisms were all inside the walls. Unless someone used explosives, they couldn't be opened.

The third floor was a large suite. Third Uncle was a person who knew how to enjoy life but didn't show it outwardly. He wasn't interested in many modern entertainments. All the rosewood furniture in this large suite was very expensive, but compared to them, I actually preferred soft sofas. So I knew that since I was going to stay here for a considerable time, I'd have to add some things.

Actually, when I stayed here last time, I had already discovered that Third Uncle lived a pretty bleak life. Someone like him, who had experienced too much in his youth and enjoyed too much, found women, wealth, and status completely unappealing. His entire room was filled with furniture, calligraphy, paintings, and various playthings like the four treasures of the study. But if you opened his drawers, you'd find that almost all of them were empty, and some had a thin layer of dust.

This indicated that since the furniture was bought, these drawers had never had anything put in them.

No life.

A lonely old man, aside from some things from his territory: account books, teacups, tea leaves. Then there were many ancient books used for decoration. The books were genuine old books, but it was clear that Third Uncle had hardly ever flipped through them. The most common things found in his room were various expired newspapers.

This place was too big for him; he didn't have enough stuff to fill all these drawers. After I returned from Xisha, I had thoroughly searched the place, so I knew where the things I was interested in were. The documents from Third Uncle's investigation of the archaeological team back then were mostly useless, but I still planned to read them again, just not now.

I sat down at his desk. On his desk were a desk lamp, an incense burner, a telephone, and some paper and pens. Exactly the same as before I left.

The only somewhat decent item was a computer, but it was a very old model with only a fifteen-inch monitor. Third Uncle used it to play card games and view electronic ledgers. He didn't know how to use a computer, only how to use the mouse for simple operations. The system was the original Windows 2000; it had no network card and couldn't connect to the internet at all.

I closed my eyes, trying to feel if I could fall asleep. Although I felt a bit tired, perhaps because the intensive underground activities over this period had accustomed me to such high levels of fatigue, I had no sleepiness at all.

I took out my phone and sent a text to everyone that I had arrived. Then I took a deep breath and suddenly didn't know what to do.

Did Third Uncle also spend every day like this, sitting behind this desk lost in random thoughts?

No wonder he was so tormented. If he had been so poor that he couldn't even pay the water bill, maybe he wouldn't have ended up like this.

Humans are really strange creatures. Their most important goal is survival, yet survival is often not their biggest worry. When people have satisfied all their needs, they often create an unsolvable trouble for themselves.

Inborn, humans exist for troubles. And even if you think through this problem, it's useless. There are always some troubles that even if you understand the logic, you can't help but get involved in, just like me now.

I touched my own face, knowing that during this time I had to find something to keep myself occupied, otherwise I would be tortured to death by all kinds of memories. Panzi was no longer around. Although I did not plan to announce his death, without him, many things would not go as smoothly as before.

There were also Ya Jie and Second Uncle. The former was someone I had to convince; as for Second Uncle, it would be best if I could avoid meeting him altogether, because he was too smart, and there was absolutely no way I could deceive him. I still had seven days before I could remove my mask. To deal with any emergencies, there were some things I should do.

I went to the bathroom at Third Uncle's place, shaved my beard, took a shower, then called one of my subordinates' manager and told him I wouldn't see any guests today; I was going to sleep all day. Then I climbed into bed, turned on the TV to watch cartoons, and kept watching until I fell asleep.

This sleep was very difficult. Various dreams caused me to wake up startled more than once. Several times I felt I saw Panzi, covered in blood, standing beside me.

I didn't feel the slightest bit of fear. I only felt despair, a despair that was consuming me all the time.