Chapter 180: Showdown

I wasn't surprised at all by Xue Bing's visit. Years ago, she could run to Hengyue City to ask me for a sponsorship when I had only met her once.

When a drought lasts too long, there is bound to be a violent storm.

Xue Bing was actually a woman with a fierce temper. In the years we were together, she appeared soft and obedient on the surface, but in her bones flowed incredibly strong blood. She said this was a war with Huang Weiwei, and I was the trophy of their war. A trophy! It has value; there is no war in the world without value. A man reduced to a trophy in a woman's war—is it an honor? Is it a humiliation? I no longer had the energy to analyze it.

Xue Bing was the woman I loved deeply. Our love was pure and noble, and our love once became the wish of many people, but the castle of love we carefully built was easily breached by Huang Weiwei.

I never regretted having loved her deeply!

I don't know when it started, but my love for her began to fade. Thinking carefully, I realized that ever since I became the Township Head of Suxi, the person appearing in my heart every day was no longer Xue Bing.

A strange thought suddenly sprouted: can love change with a change in status?

The desires hidden in my consciousness were growing stronger, and I suddenly discovered that Suxi Township was no longer my lifelong dream.

Men all have a dream of being an emperor! I was no exception, and I even dreamed it more beautifully.

Most men are polyamorous, wanting all the women in the world to belong to them, as if beauty is the only pursuit in life.

When I was very young, I talked about ideals with several childhood friends. While they dreamed of being scientists, artists, or writers, I was unique in wanting to be an emperor. I even expounded that I wanted to set up a "Castration Platform" to drag all the men in the world and cut off their "dust roots" one by one. Then I would be the only one left in the world, monopolizing all the women.

The children laughed uproariously, calling me a lecher, a sex demon, and even a little girl said I was a beast. She asked if I would cut off my own father's "dust root" too?

The absurdities and unruliness of youth faded year by year, and people slowly matured as they grew up. The more mature a person is, the more terrifying! Mature men and women become terrifying without knowing it, as if there is no one in the world who can be trusted, as if everyone is coveting what they possess.

When I first met Xue Bing, I didn't have any transgressive thoughts. In my eyes, she was a fairy who didn't eat the food of mortals; she was one of the few female scholars to come out of Suxi in a thousand years, and her beautiful appearance and voice like a lark were once the pride and model of Suxi people. She was a god in the hearts of thousands of families in Suxi Township.

Xue Bing and I getting to know each other and finally falling in love was considered a great happy event in Suxi Township. Everyone thought we were the most compatible, a match made in heaven. If it were anyone else, they couldn't have achieved the marriage they had in their ideals.

"Let's go home today." Xue Bing stood before me, looking at her toes with a blank expression.

"Go where?" I couldn't grasp her thoughts.

"To my house; my mother wants to see you." She looked at me, her gaze somewhat flustered.

I smiled faintly, "Is something the matter? It's not a holiday or a festival."

"You didn't go during the holidays either." Xue Bing's toe ground hard against a tiny ant. The ant was too small, hiding in the uneven cement cracks, attempting to escape the disaster falling from the sky.

I broke into a cold sweat. I had known Xue Bing for five years and dated for nearly three, yet I didn't even know if her house faced south or north. It wasn't that I didn't want to go; sometimes things would happen that made it impossible, like this year's New Year's visit—when I set out, I encountered a heavy rain, and mountain floods came, covering everything. To go to Xue Bing's house, I had to cross a small river that wasn't originally wide, but with the flood, it could turn into a chasm in the blink of an eye.

The heavy rain lasted for two days, and the flood didn't recede until three days later. The township government organized post-disaster self-rescue, which delayed the trip.

"Your mother came to see me a while ago." I said, turning sideways into the office. It was bad for our business to be chatting in the corridor.

Xue Bing refused to come in, standing by the door and asking aggressively, "Are you going or not?"

"Not going." I answered cleanly.

"Why not?"

"What is there to go for? Besides, I'm still at work." I found a random excuse, not daring to look her in the eye.

"Do you want to break up?" She went straight to the point, not giving me any room to think.

"No."

"You're even lying to yourself, Chen Feng." Xue Bing sighed, "No wonder people say, 'Better to believe in a prostitute's vagina than an official's mouth.'"

"Xue Bing, you're using foul language." I didn't dare to speak loudly, and I was very surprised she could say such crude things.

"I am a woman. There is nothing a woman doesn't dare to say. What haven't I seen? I've experienced it all, so what am I afraid of saying?" She said, her face flushed, leaning against the door, unhurried.

I went over to pull her in, but she broke free from my hand and looked at me provocatively.

"Come in and talk. Watch your influence." I reminded her.

"Everyone has already abandoned me, so what influence am I afraid of?" She said, tears welling up, looking pitiful.

"Xue Bing." I called her, "You are not an ordinary rural woman; you are a new woman with knowledge."

Xue Bing smiled bitterly, "This isn't Hengyue City; it's Suxi Township. In the eyes of rural people, a woman being abandoned by her man is the most shameful thing."

"You're not a bad woman." I said foolishly, pulling her in again. This time she didn't refuse, following me in and sitting on a chair, but refusing to look up at me.

"Whether I'm bad or not isn't up to you. The common people have a scale in their hearts; they have their own moral standards."

I fell silent. Everyone knew we had lived together; if I broke up with her, she would be a "discarded wife," and if she wanted to find another ideal husband, it would be harder than ascending to heaven in Suxi Township. Public opinion is fearful; no one would be willing to gamble their life on gossip.

Of course, as long as she was willing to lower her standards, she wouldn't be without suitors. There are only men who can't find wives in the world, not ugly women who can't get married. Besides, she was an exceptionally beautiful woman.

But would she consider herself a "withered flower"?

No! She was a woman with a heart higher than the sky, pure and clean. She would rather let her soul drift away.

"Really not going?" She hesitated and said, "It's fine if you don't go. Anyway, I've decided; I'm going to Hengyue City to find Huang Weiwei in a few days."

"What are you going to find her for?" I was shocked.

"To talk it out. To tell her that you are a man with a girlfriend." Xue Bing smiled, her fingers picking tightly at the chair, as if wanting to pick off a piece of wood.

"Nonsense." I was furious, "I have nothing to do with her, why are you going to find her?"

"It's even better if you have nothing to do with her." Xue Bing exhaled as if relieved, "Whether you have a relationship or not, isn't it better to make it clear?"

"Can some things be made clear?" I began to pace around the room like a headless fly.

"It's because I'm afraid it can't be made clear that I'm going to find her." She raised her head stubbornly, a look of determination appearing on her face.

"Fine, I'm afraid of you." I surrendered, "I'll go home with you."

"I don't want you to go anymore." Xue Bing's face instantly turned into a look of victory, "My mother originally wanted me to call you back for a meal; she prepared some good things for you. Now I don't want you to go; don't eat it, go eat in your cafeteria."

"I really want to go." I stated sincerely.

"I don't care if you really want to or not. Anyway, if you go, I still have to find Huang Weiwei; if you don't go, I still have to find her."

"Can you not go?"

"No." Her attitude was firm, making me feel as if I had fallen into an abyss.

"It's meaningless." I gave up pleading, my heart listless.

"I went to find your cousin-in-law, you should know that, right?" Xue Bing returned to a look of smiling but not smiling.

I nodded as an answer.

"And you know my purpose for finding your cousin-in-law?"

I nodded again.

"What are your thoughts?" She looked at me nervously.

Her nervousness suddenly made me understand: Xue Bing finding Huang Weiwei was a lie, and asking me to go to her house was also a lie; she was not a simple woman! Thinking of this, I felt much more relaxed.

"I have no thoughts." I said lightly, starting to smoke.

"Smoke less, your mouth smells like smoke." She scolded, waving her hand in front of her nose exaggeratedly.

"I've always been smoking." I took a hard drag and exhaled a ring of smoke.

"Smoke, smoke yourself to death." She cursed viciously. Instantly, she returned to the tenderness and helplessness of a little woman.

I giggled, "I won't die from smoking. Look, some people don't smoke their whole lives, and they die before they're thirty—the representative figure is Lei Feng. Some people smoke their whole lives and live to be over ninety—the representative figure is Old Man Zhu. Cigarettes are good things; they sterilize, disinfect, remove odors, refresh the mind, and soothe the lungs." After finishing, I deliberately took a few hard drags, filling the room with smoke.

"If your cousin-in-law is willing to help us and transfer me to a primary school in Hengyue City, even if I don't teach, I'm willing." She said with infinite longing, "As long as I go to Hengyue City, what can't be solved?"

My heart stirred; Xue Bing's heartfelt words dealt a heavy blow to my soul. ===== CHAPTER 181 =====