Chapter 3

When Lu Bao'er woke up, it was raining outside the window. The pattering sound of water struck the window, and dampness rushed over her.

She lay on the couch, the thin cotton blanket not keeping out the cold; she didn't know whether it was the weakness from blood loss making her feel especially cold, or whether the weather had changed, so she genuinely felt the bleak chill of winter.

Lu Bao'er tried to sit up, but her five viscera and six bowels felt as if they were torn apart; the pain left her only able to draw breath in, not out.

She wasn't left for dead in the wilderness by a mad horse; being able to feel pain meant she was still alive—truly a blessing of great fortune, perhaps her father was watching over her from above.

Thinking of her dearest father, and then of the ruthless Xie Junling, she finally had a reason to cry; tears streamed down her face as if they were free.

"Does it hurt much?" someone asked softly as they came in through the door, bringing with them a faint orchid fragrance and the gradually enveloping scent of the bitter decoction they had brewed.

That voice…… Lu Bao'er remembered! Could it be Xie Junling?

She wanted to move, but shrank back in fright two steps; a pair of cat-like large eyes locked onto the man holding the medicine. He remained as handsome as ever, even without her by his side, he hadn't faded much.

It seemed that without her, he was just as well off, with food and sleep; it was her foolishness—when she was in the countryside, she would sometimes think of Xie Junling and feel so upset she couldn't eat, only managing two oiled duck necks.

If Xie Junling truly wanted her dead, why bother now to hypocritically bring her medicine?

Could it be poison?

Forget it, forget it; if it's poison, could she still escape? It's just a life—if he wants it, he can take it, letting her reincarnate in the next life without having to suffer this humiliation.

"I've been brewing the medicine for a long time; I remember you hate bitterness, so I also prepared some candied fruit." Xie Junling never touched her, but now he acted strangely, his soft fingertips brushing her cheek as if he felt deep pity, the corners of his eyes slightly narrowed and lifted, unable to bear looking at her miserable state.

Lu Bao'er steeled herself, slightly lifting her chin, obediently pressing her lips to the bowl's rim; the thick medicinal liquid rolled down her cheek, and Xie Junling didn't mind the mess, taking it with his pale, slender hand, and finally even slipped a candied fruit into her mouth.

Thus they remained silent for a quarter of an hour, and Lu Bao'er was not poisoned by the medicine.

"Tired." She held a candied date in her mouth; it was sweet, but her heart remained bitter—if a single candy could make her realize Xie Junling's goodness again, that would be disgraceful.

Moreover, he still wanted to kill her; the vivid image of her near-death experience constantly reminded her that this man had an unknown side. Although they had been husband and wife for a year, she still didn't understand him.

Lu Bao'er was at a loss, so she could only try to drive Xie Junling away like this.

Xie Junling, however, refused to leave, sitting before the couch and muttering to himself: "I had the doctor examine you; fortunately your injuries aren't serious, and with a few months of recuperation you'll recover."

Seeing that this residence was secluded and shabby—even inferior to the home she had put together in the countryside—Lu Bao'er concluded it certainly wasn't inside Xie Junling's top scholar's mansion.

Could it be that he didn't even want her to set foot in his mansion, hastily buying her a place and installing her here, so that they would go their separate ways from now on, with no further ties?

Lu Bao'er barely furrowed her brows, a bitter resentment welling in her heart, and she asked somewhat aggrieved: "This place probably isn't your mansion, is it?"

Xie Junling glanced at her lightly, lips parting softly, and said: "No."

Hearing this, Lu Bao'er lowered her eyes and gathered her gaze, daring not to ask further. What's the point of getting to the bottom of it? It's better to keep some distance, so she can still think fondly of him in the future.

"I think this courtyard is quite good; the sunlight outside is ample. I could even open up a mu of field here on my own, and when I have nothing to do I'd plant two cucumbers, eating them in summer tossed with vinegar."

Lu Bao'er pulled up her lips into a bitter smile; she wanted to smile prettily, but for some reason, forcing the corners of her mouth up looked ferocious—a forced grin.

Xie Junling tucked the blanket around her and said gently: "As long as you like it, everything's fine."

He rarely showed such a refined, gentle smile toward Lu Bao'er; back in the countryside, he would always loudly tell her not to enter the study, lest she ruin his freshly written ink that hadn't yet dried.

Now he shows her tenderness and affection—could it be just to leave a trace of marital affection for their final few meetings?

There's really no need to go to such lengths; she has gained an advantage and won't broadcast it abroad, she could still claim she's never been with anyone, that she's an innocent bride, and later find another lover—Xie Junling's current display of false sincerity only makes her feel vexed and restless.

In fact, Xie Junling didn't want Lu Bao'er to enter the study because he feared she would always bring flower cakes inside to eat.

That scent could attract stray kittens; more than once cats had sneaked into his room scavenging for food, all thanks to Lu Bao'er, who secretly fed the stray cats in the backyard behind his back, unafraid of being bitten on the hands or feet.

Xie Junling still has to go to the Hanlin Academy tomorrow; he can't linger long in this rural area.

He had rented this secluded little compound and prepared five or six rough maids for Lu Bao'er; if anything happened, those maids would step forward to block blades, after all Xie Junling isn't exactly a good person—he holds the fortunes and lives of entire families in his hands.

It's better not to tell Lu Bao'er these things; having finally nurtured her innocent, carefree nature, one shouldn't taint her ears with such matters.

Xie Junling rose, leisurely smoothing the wrinkles from his sleeves pressed by the blanket, drew out his inner garment, and said unhurriedly: "I must return first; I'll come see you tomorrow. I've assigned a few people for you—you can direct them as you wish, and call them if anything comes up."

Lu Bao'er bit her lip, wanting to say something, but in the end said nothing. His frank abandonment of her—did he really need to ask what hour of the Chinese zodiac it was?

Seeing Xie Junling's robes flutter as he was about to disappear from her sight, Lu Bao'er couldn't help calling out: "Xie Junling..." Her voice sounded unfamiliar; before, she had always teased him, calling him her husband.

"Won't you call me husband?" Xie Junling never joked with her like this; if she shouted randomly he would scold her for fooling around. This time, for some unknown reason, he actually brought it up himself.

Lu Bao'er pressed her lips shut, eyes closed, gritted her teeth: "Why do you want to kill me? If you want to kill me, why then save me?"

Xie Junling stared for a moment, his knuckles suddenly clenching: "You think I'm the one who wants to kill you?"

"Only I wrote you a letter saying I'd reach the capital in half a month, detailing which road to take and what kind of carriage—apart from you, no one else knew. Moreover, you're now an official, enjoying limitless glory; someone like me can't help you at all and would only drag you down, so…"

She also wanted to say it wasn't him, but who else could it be? Even if seeking revenge, why not go after his troubles instead of necessarily coming after Lu Bao'er?

"So what?" Xie Junling rarely raised his voice; he had always been a gentle, steady, graceful young master, even being much older than her, and had never quarreled with her like children.

But this time, seeing the gloom in his eyes, as if she had struck a sore spot, Lu Bao'er dared not continue speaking.

Would this provoke his anger? Or would this man, having his thoughts exposed, become furious out of embarrassment?

Xie Junling was merely angry—angry that he had kept her for over a year, she had learned nothing else, yet had read many licentious wild histories from play scripts. He pitied her; back then she was still young, petite, just reaching his waist, and after not seeing her for years she had grown so much, become a young lady.

She was his little wife; while he was away preparing for the metropolitan exam, seeking fame and fortune, all to give her a better life, yet she had never trusted him.

He paused, then said: "Listen carefully—if I wanted to kill you, would you even have the chance to recuperate in this detached residence? I hired people to search for you for three full days before finding you deep in the dense forest. If I wanted you dead, I would have killed you the moment I found you outside; why would I leave evidence? You can't suspect anyone but suspect me—I am your husband."

Having said that, he paused again, finding it hard to continue. Perhaps he had spoken too much today, leaving him somewhat at a loss. To lose composure in front of a young maiden—how ridiculous.

Lu Bao'er thought, and that made sense. She fell silent then, so was it she who had caused this fuss, wrongly accusing Xie Junling? If not him, then who else?

Her expression was complex, and she didn't know how to think about it. At this moment, being quick-tongued, she blurted out another doubt: "Since my husband doesn't despise me, why then have me stay in such a secluded residence, to keep people's eyes and ears away?"

Xie Junling glanced at her, unsure whether angry or mocking: "The doctor said you have wounds in many places; not breaking your neck is already a blessing. It's best you don't move for half a month. Even if I wanted to take you back to the mansion, I'd have to see whether your body can endure it."

Really? Lu Bao'er froze for a second, her face flushing crimson. She felt embarrassed, yet didn't know what to say to explain.

She said she didn't care, but her mind was clearly preoccupied; she had even spoken it aloud, giving Xie Junling something to laugh at.

Lu Bao'er softly tried to appease Xie Junling: "Husband..."

Xie Junling turned back, saying lightly: "Someone like me, a wicked and heinous villain, doesn't deserve your title of husband."

"..." All right, he really was angry now.