Chapter 135: Bitter Gourd Feast

Yet he completely failed to notice the fleeting pride and hint of a smile that flashed in Zhang Fan's eyes.

After Ba Ke Er finally forced down the bitter taste, finishing all the bitter gourd juice and the dressed bitter gourd, Zhang Fan finally gave him an approving look.

Seeing Zhang Fan smile, Ba Ke Er felt that as long as he could make his beloved happy, he would willingly eat any amount of bitter gourd! Of course, he would also be willing to eat other things, like the cured meat in the courtyard.

Thinking this, Ba Ke Er couldn't help but break into a pleased smile, as if the person who had just been tormented by bitter gourd and furrowed his brows wasn't him at all!

Ba Ke Er's beaming, eyebrow-raising smile caught Zhang Fan's eye, and he thought it shone even brighter than the sun that day. Still, he had to overlook the bitter gourd juice at the corner of Ba Ke Er's mouth and the fine bits of dressed bitter gourd on his chest.

Ba Ke Er, however, seemed completely unaware of his own appearance, still standing there foolishly grinning, which made Zhang Fan inexplicably feel an urge to slap him a few times to jolt him awake, lest he remain so foolish.

But Zhang Fan thought it over and decided to hold back—there's plenty of time ahead! No need to rush into a fight! After all, he still has a lifetime to torment him to his heart's content!

Thinking thus, Zhang Fan suppressed the urge to strike, paused, then reached out his hand—not to slap him as he had imagined, but gently wiped Ba Ke Er's mouth with his sleeve and cleared the bits of dressed bitter gourd from his chest.

Seeing Zhang Fan treat him so gently, Ba Ke Er grew even happier, his smile turning more foolish, and taking advantage of Zhang Fan's momentary inattention, he lifted him up and planted several fierce kisses.

After receiving Zhang Fan's fierce glare, Ba Ke Er reluctantly set him down. Having served Zhang Fan a seat, he then began busily washing the pots, pans, bowls and utensils Zhang Fan had just used to prepare the 'Fire-Reducing Grand Meal' in the kitchen.

After waiting for Ba Ke Er to tidy the kitchen, Zhang Fan went out with him to the courtyard to add cypress branches to the branch shelter.

Zhang Fan had originally thought Fei Er and the others would come by in the afternoon, so he specially asked Ba Ke Er to keep an eye on the cured meat while he went to the kitchen to prepare some snacks, intending to entertain Fei Er and company later.

However, upon realizing that the snacks Zhang Fan had prepared had gone cold and that Fei Er and the others still hadn't arrived, Zhang Fan couldn't help but feel puzzled.

"Ba Ke Er, you said Fei Er usually comes to our place the most often! These past two days he's been coming every day to check in! You said it's almost been a whole afternoon, yet Fei Er hasn't shown up—I even prepared his favorite nuts and sugar for him! He actually didn't come to eat them! Really!"

Hearing Zhang Fan's words, Ba Ke Er inexplicably felt a twinge of guilt; he shrank his neck and gave no response to Zhang Fan's remarks.

Seeing that he had said so much and Ba Ke Er still ignored him, Zhang Fan also felt a bit bored and thus stopped speaking.

After a while, Ba Ke Er finally noticed that Zhang Fan had fallen silent—what was going on? He furtively observed Zhang Fan's facial expression, and seeing no signs of anger or a blackened face, he also let out a sigh of relief.

Only then did Ba Ke Er say to Zhang Fan, "Mm-hmm, exactly! How could Fei Er do such a thing? It's such a waste of all this good food!" As he spoke, he himself reached out, grabbed a handful of raisins, and began eating them.

Seeing Ba Ke Er actually eating fruit left Zhang Fan astonished, completely reshaping his impression of him. He blinked hard, shook his head, and upon focusing his gaze, saw that Ba Ke Er was indeed eating raisins, relishing them as if they were a delicacy.

Zhang Fan felt utterly astonished—mixed with disbelief and delight!

"Ba Ke Er, you actually want to eat raisins now! I still remember the first time you ate grapes—you were all scornful. How come you're…"

He didn't finish the sentence, but his facial expression already conveyed everything to Ba Ke Er.

Ba Ke Er looked at Zhang Fan's expression, froze for a moment, dazed a beat before recovering, then earnestly gave Zhang Fan a diligent smile and said:

"Hehe, Fan Fan, it's not that your dried fruit is delicious, is it? Look! Those grapes are so hard to eat, so sour and astringent, yet after you lightly processed them they became this tasty!"

Saying this, Ba Ke Er, as if offering a treasure, fed Zhang Fan the raisins he still had left in his hand.

Zhang Fan looked at Ba Ke Er, smiled pleasantly, then opened his mouth and mischievously took in both of Ba Ke Er's fingers holding the raisins.

Seeing Zhang Fan also take his fingers into his mouth made Ba Ke Er a little nervous, after all his lips had just been struck at noon. If his fingers were also bitten, and Fan Fan discovered that the wound matched the one on his lips, that would be a big problem!

However, the feared outcome did not occur; all that happened was Zhang Fan gently grinding his teeth on Ba Ke Er's fingers once—and that alone made Ba Ke Er's heart race with anxiety.

Fortunately, after lightly biting, Zhang Fan spat Ba Ke Er's fingers out of his mouth. Ba Ke Er finally relaxed: "Phew! Great! Fan Fan really still loves me—he didn't want to bite me! Indeed, it must have been a dream at noon when he unintentionally wounded me!"

At this moment Ba Ke Er didn't realize that Zhang Fan had now fully perceived all his changes, nor that he himself was about to face great trouble; indeed, Ba Ke Er was still basking in self-satisfaction.

Zhang Fan thought it over and still felt it better to play a while longer, so he likewise took some raisins and personally fed them to Ba Ke Er. As they fed each other, they somehow drew closer and closer, until they nearly ended up kissing.

Ba Ke Er, quick-witted, realized this was a rare opportunity; just as they were about to lean in, he suddenly pretended to lose his balance and lunged to kiss Zhang Fan's lips.

Zhang Fan, completely unprepared, was kissed squarely on the lips. For a moment he didn't know whether to cry or laugh; faced with such childish behavior from Ba Ke Er, he could only laugh and cry at once.

After furtively glancing at Ba Ke Er, Zhang Fan thought it over and decided this couldn't just be let go—the matter from noon wasn't settled yet, and now he was being tormented again.

Zhang Fan couldn't help muttering to himself: "Hmph, looks like I have no choice but to play with him today, otherwise I'd feel guilty for biting him!"

If Ba Ke Er had noticed Zhang Fan's expression at this moment, he would surely have realized his impending misfortune; however, things are never that predictable. Ba Ke Er not only failed to notice Zhang Fan's expression, but more importantly he had already immersed himself in his imagined blissful world.

When Ba Ke Er finally came to, Zhang Fan had already finished adding firewood; upon sensing Ba Ke Er's return, he immediately lunged forward, feigning an accidental tumble, and suddenly shoved Ba Ke Er to the ground.

With a loud 'thud', Ba Ke Er lay on the ground, while Zhang Fan deliberately pressed himself atop him, feigning remorse, widening his innocent eyes, and incessantly apologizing to Ba Ke Er.

Yet Zhang Fan's inner monologue was: "Hmph! Serve you right for falling! I've taken advantage of you again, you little brat! Hmph! We're an old married couple, yet you're still so childish! Can't you act more mature? Fine, I'll just decisively knock you down! Damn! When did my Ba Ke Er become so useless!"

Meanwhile Ba Ke Er, oblivious to Zhang Fan's inner thoughts, saw only Zhang Fan's red, innocent, watery big eyes fixed on him, and without realizing it, felt his own body temperature rise.

After Zhang Fan finished his string of apologies, he climbed to his feet and then pulled Ba Ke Er up from the ground.

After all that horseplay, the sky gradually darkened, and Zhang Fan began silently calculating what to have for dinner. After thinking it over, he abandoned the idea of consulting Ba Ke Er.

After all, Zhang Fan felt he hadn't had enough fun yet, and he still hadn't repaid Ba Ke Er for his little tricks; thus, having made up his mind, he greeted Ba Ke Er and went to the kitchen to prepare dinner.

Ba Ke Er, meanwhile, having been knocked down by Zhang Fan and covered in dust, wanted to avoid offending the cleanliness-loving Zhang Fan, so almost as soon as Zhang Fan left, he fetched several buckets of well water and went to the bathroom to wash up.

When Ba Ke Er finished his bath and came out, he heard Zhang Fan calling him to eat. He wondered idly whether Fan Fan, having not rested enough at noon, was tired and didn't want to cook dinner, so he was just taking stored provisions from the Yu pan zhi to eat.

Thinking thus, Ba Ke Er's feet didn't pause; within a few breaths he entered the main hall. Upon glancing at the table and seeing everything covered, the sight only reinforced his suspicion.

However, after he and Zhang Fan had seated themselves and he lifted the lid— "Am! Beast God!"—he nearly burst into tears from fright.

All he could see was a vast expanse of green, glossy bitter gourd! Even the bowl of roasted meat sauce originally used for wrapping pancakes had been swapped by Zhang Fan for dressed bitter gourd.

Even the floral tea they usually drank to relieve greasiness had been replaced with bitter gourd juice; the whole table was filled with endless bitter gourd.

Dressed bitter gourd, stuffed bitter gourd, stir-fried bitter gourd, bitter gourd soup…

The sight made Ba Ke Er's face turn almost green! Watching him, Zhang Fan couldn't help chuckling to himself: "Hmph! Let's see how you deal with this!"

Nevertheless, on the surface Zhang Fan adopted a solemn tone and asked Ba Ke Er: "Ba Ke Er, what's wrong with you? Hurry up and eat! Why are you just standing there? Look at how good I am! For you I specially prepared this whole table of bitter gourd feast!"

Faced with that, Ba Ke Er could do nothing but force a smile—what else could he do?

Oh, right! He could also eat more bitter gourd as Zhang Fan wished, to reduce his internal heat!

That night, Ba Ke Er waited until Zhang Fan fell asleep before daring to get up, heading to the bathroom to rinse his mouth over and over—yet even after dozens of rinses the bitterness remained. He could only eat some preserved fruits and dried snacks, and only after consuming them for most of the night did the bitter taste finally fade.

Yet his bitter gourd nightmare wasn't over! Over the next few days he ate successive bitter gourd feasts, dozen after dozen, until he could barely keep them down—only then did Zhang Fan relent.

Zhang Fan stood before Ba Ke Er with his arms crossed, half-smiling, and asked: "Ba Ke Er, do you still dare to sneak a kiss? What's wrong with being open about it? Even if you suddenly pounce on me, I'd hold no grudge—why go through all this?"

Ba Ke Er could only reply with a bitter smile—turns out his clever Fan Fan had already noticed! If that's the case, why bother enduring? Enduring longer would only mean eating more days of bitter gourd feasts!

Without another word, Ba Ke Er summoned his boyfriend power, swept Zhang Fan up in one motion, flung him onto the bed, and consumed him completely.

Afterward, Zhang Fan also softened, curling up like a harmless little kitten in Ba Ke Er's embrace, and slowly fell asleep. Seeing this, Ba Ke Er smiled gently and also drifted off to sleep.