Chapter 138: Chongzhen Picks Up Girls in the Rear Palace

At that moment, Hong Taiji desperately wanted to drag Tong Shouyue's corpse out and flog it all over again — that idiot was utterly infuriating. The head on his neck served no purpose except to make him look taller!

A place as critical as Tongyuan Fort — how could it just be taken like that? The stockpiled grain and fodder, the weapons, all destroyed in a single day.

Well, that's just perfect. The whole plan to attack Joseon and Dongjiang has now mostly fallen apart, and everything will have to be prepared all over again.

As for the intelligence report now in his hands — a letter supposedly written in Yuan Chonghuan's own hand, claiming he had already killed Mao Wenlong — Hong Taiji sneered without end. He practically wanted to ride straight to the capital and hack Chongzhen to death himself.

Are you fucking treating this Khan like a fool for your amusement? Do you think I don't know Yuan Chonghuan has already fallen?

And that he killed Mao Wenlong? If Mao Wenlong were dead, then which bastard son of a turtle pulled off the business at Tongyuan Fort?

Hong Taiji's towering rage meant absolutely nothing to Chongzhen. However many Jianzhou barbarians Mao Wenlong killed, at worst it just cost him some laborers. Anyway, those people paid no taxes and rendered no corvée — they were utterly useless to him, so why should he care if they died?

Right now, the single most important thing was that little ancestor in the Empress's belly. Whether a son or a daughter, it was his regardless.

A daughter would make up for the regret of having no daughter before he transmigrated. If it was a son, then the Great Ming would have its dynastic foundation.

As long as the kid didn't screw his father over too badly, this child would be the next emperor without question. So it was hardly surprising that Chongzhen couldn't help being anxious about Empress Zhou's belly.

Because he had ordered Empress Zhou's younger brother to be put to death, Chongzhen occasionally felt a bit guilty about it. So he picked a fine day and accompanied Empress Zhou to the imperial garden to admire the flowers.

Ever since Chongzhen ascended the throne, he had been diligently immersed in government affairs — when had there ever been a moment like this, a young couple enjoying the flowers together? Just as Empress Zhou was brimming with happiness, she heard Chongzhen heave a sigh.

Empress Zhou asked curiously, "Why does Your Majesty sigh?"

Chongzhen, who was experimenting a bit with some later-era techniques for picking up women, gave another short sigh before speaking: "Ever since We assumed the throne, We have not properly kept the Empress company.

Even the several snowfalls this year — We were unable to enjoy them with the Empress. Thinking on it now, We feel rather sorry for it in Our heart."

Hearing this, Empress Zhou bowed and said, "Why does Your Majesty say such things? Your Majesty's diligence in governance and love for the people is a blessing to all under Heaven. How could military and state affairs be set aside for the sake of this one concubine?"

Chongzhen shook his head. "Government affairs can never be fully dealt with. A while earlier or a while later, they must always be handled slowly. We only regret not having properly accompanied the Empress to enjoy the snow."

Having said this, he instructed Wang Cheng'en at his side: "Make a note of it. If it snows next year, remember to remind Us. We wish to accompany the Empress to enjoy the snow."

After Wang Cheng'en bowed and acknowledged the order, Chongzhen turned to Empress Zhou and said, "If We enjoy the snow together with the Empress, We shall certainly forbid these servants from holding umbrellas.

When the time comes, We and the Empress walking together in the snow — would that not be walking together until our hair turns white?"

The original Chongzhen was practically a bookworm. The transmigrated Zhu Xiaosong was originally a programmer.

Terrified of death, he spent every day thinking about how to prolong the Great Ming's life, and naturally neglected Empress Zhou somewhat. When had he ever spoken such romantic words to her?

Now that the situation had finally improved a little, Chongzhen took these lines he had seen on a later-era internet and used them on Empress Zhou. Empress Zhou, who had never seen or experienced the later generations' methods of flirting, fell for it on the spot.

When Chongzhen looked at Empress Zhou, he saw that her eyes had already grown as alluring as silk threads, her small hands twisting and twisting the handkerchief she held, her entire breathing growing somewhat quickened.

Chongzhen, however, suddenly felt regret. If he had spoken these words back when Empress Zhou was not pregnant, who knew how many new positions he might have unlocked.

After escorting Empress Zhou back to rest, Chongzhen then ordered someone to summon the newly promoted Consort Wan — Wanyan Yuzhuo — to come keep him company while admiring the flowers.

To Chongzhen's disappointment, however, the romantic words sufficient to make Empress Zhou unlock many new positions had absolutely no effect whatsoever on this little minx Wanyan Yuzhuo.

Wanyan Yuzhuo, whose artlessly charming nature had not changed after entering the palace, laughed aloud upon hearing Chongzhen's theory about white hair.

"Your Majesty wishes to enjoy the snow — what is there to enjoy about this lousy snow?

In Liaodong, which day does it not snow? As for growing white hair together — what's so difficult about that?

Someday when my husband has pacified the Jianzhou barbarians and slaughtered every man taller than a cartwheel, Your Majesty can take your consort on a pleasure trip to Liaodong. Wouldn't we be able to grow white hair together however we pleased?"

You make so much sense, We are actually left speechless. Feeling as though he had been casting flirtatious glances at a blind woman, Chongzhen laughed and said, "How is it that Consort Wan thinks of nothing but fighting and killing all day long?

And slaughtering every man taller than a cartwheel — that's a Mongol method, isn't it?"

Wanyan Yuzhuo was ordinarily rather bold. Now that she felt she had gained Chongzhen's favor, she spoke whatever was on her mind even more freely.

She said directly to Chongzhen, "Your Majesty only says the Mongol Yuan's methods are brutal, but you do not know that this is the supreme principle of the steppe. The Jianzhou barbarians were originally a branch from the steppe — wolves that can never be domesticated.

Kill all their adults, keep the children and slowly train them — that is the proper way. After all, ever since the Xiongnu, the tribes of the steppe have always needed a master of their own.

Rather than let the Jianzhou barbarians be that master, it would be better for Your Majesty to be that master. Your Majesty is, after all, Yuzhuo's husband."

Hearing this, Chongzhen deliberately teased Wanyan Yuzhuo and let out a laugh. "Then what of your father's tribe? What of the entire Xibe people?"

Wanyan Yuzhuo's expression did not change in the slightest. Without the slightest hesitation, she said, "This consort's father is this consort's father.

If one day my husband must go to war with my father, this consort will also, without hesitation, take up bow and blade and lead out the warhorse for Your Majesty."

After a brief pause, Wanyan Yuzhuo continued, "Your Majesty must not think this consort heartless. On the steppe, since ancient times, the strong are honored.

The strong rightfully possess everything; the weak deserve to die. The Great Ming has been far too merciful toward the steppe in the past.

As for the Xibe, if Your Majesty can win the hearts of the tribe, they will be far more reliable than even Ligdan Khan and the Three Duoyan Guards."

Just as she was about to continue, she noticed Chongzhen's expression had turned somewhat odd. Wanyan Yuzhuo immediately asked curiously, "What is the matter, Your Majesty? Could it be that this consort spoke incorrectly?"

Chongzhen shook his head and gave a wry smile.

"Everything you said is correct.

But do not speak these words so casually in the future. Otherwise, if someone impeaches you before the Empress for interfering in state affairs from the rear palace, even We would find it difficult to plead for leniency on your behalf."

Wanyan Yuzhuo pursed her lips and said sullenly, "Yes, this consort understands."

Is this chapter filler? Does it count as driving? The whole country got snow, only Beijing perfectly missed it again... Those of you who want to pick up girls, go ahead and use these romantic lines. No need to thank Us — Our name is Chongzhen.

By the way, continuing to recommend Our in-law's novel "Dominating the Primitive" — Holy shit! Whose saber-toothed tiger got loose!

(End of chapter)