Chapter 135: Chinu's Soliloquy (Five)

【In this world, there will be no one better than her.

I know.

I know that.

Some people, even if they are high and mighty, cannot avoid being useless.

And some people, even if dressed in coarse cloth, just a glance can let you know her future......

Even brighter than sunlight, three parts more radiant.

At that time, when she said in the darkness that she wanted to win the world, I wanted to follow her.

I wanted to follow her.

Because I all too clearly understood what that gaze meant.

Ambition.

Heroic aspiration.

The desolate night cannot conceal the vigorous desire.

What she said is correct.

Kindred spirits.

We, are kindred spirits.

Even if we haven't met in years, a single glance lets us recognize each other.

We ought to together occupy the world......

Or else, die together.

And before death, as long as I can be with her, no matter what happens, whatever we encounter......

It is all worthwhile.

Everything, is worthwhile.

"...... You have changed."

The humming receded, all things swirled downward.

I heard the old man seated in the chief seat murmur.

My head still ached a little; after several breaths, I realized that Ruansizong was speaking to me.

He said:

"...... Chinu, you have changed."

I know what he is thinking.

Not to mention me during the court upheaval years ago; even a year ago, when I served in the false dynasty's bureau and was rejected by myriad officials, I certainly wouldn't have reduced myself to such a sorry state, knowing I would suffer humiliation, yet still offering my head at his feet.

But he doesn't know what I am thinking.

I think, I haven't changed.

From the beginning, I have merely been an official.

If I encountered a wise lord who craved submission, I too would grovel and serve with my looks.

It's just that before, no one was worthy of me doing that.

Now that I have, not to mention stepping on my head a few times, even if he stabbed me a few times, severed my legs, as long as he is willing to assist the Wife Master, this match is still my win.

As long as my kneeling can exchange for the Wife Master standing......

Then this match is still my win.

The humming in my ears gradually faded to the distance, like a tide receding.

I heard my own breathing, heavy, tinged with the smell of blood froth, pounding against my chest cavity.

The nosebleed wouldn't stop, no matter how much I wiped.

I could only hold it in my mouth and swallow it gulp by gulp.

That warmth slid down my esophagus, like swallowing a mouthful of scalding liquor, burning my chest tight.

However, I still softly spoke to advise him:

"Master Ruansizong..."

"Junior today... have three reasons to tell you, sir."

Ruansizong gave no response.

So I then went on to say:

"First, the Mandate of Heaven is impermanent; only the virtuous may hold it."

"Formerly, Shang Zhou was tyrannical; King Wu of Zhou, using the Mengjin Assembly, replaced the Yin; Qin lost its deer, all under heaven pursued it, and finally it went to Gaozu. You, sir, well-read in the Book of Songs, surely you know the Book of Documents says, 'Heaven hears as the people hear; Heaven sees as the people see'?"

"Now the current ruler lacks virtue, usurping the state for himself; this year's taxes are frequent, yet outside your Lingnan Prefecture a great flood rages, while inside they still perform songs and dances of peace—is this not a sign that the Mandate of Heaven is about to change?"

I said this, and my lungs felt as if pricked by something, and I couldn't help but cough.

What I coughed up were nothing but blood specks, spattering my cuffs, dot by dot.

I closed my mouth, held them between my lips, and swallowed them down.

"Second, the Ruansizong clan, since your grandfather, sir, have been the prestigious clan of Jingchuan, passing down poetry and rites; their disciples and former officials spread across the nine provinces' commanderies. But consider, sir, since Yuan Lang seized power, has the Imperial Court ever given even a day's relief to the gentry? Taxes are not reduced, corvée labor never ceases. The prefect over you, who prefers male lovers, searches the populace for mystic oddities, sets up furnaces to concoct elixirs, seeks immortals and medicines...... Can the Imperial Court even momentarily stop this?"

"Sir, of lofty integrity and outstanding talent, deeply versed in this matter, why do you still wish to serve this false dynasty?"

The hall was very quiet.

Ruansizong still had no answer.

Only this time, the old steward had at some point withdrawn to outside the door.

Obviously.

Someone was listening.

Someone is listening to my words.

At that moment, the pain in my five viscera and six bowels finally lessened a bit.

I braced my upper jaw, forcing the last surge of blood back down:

"Three..."

"Good birds choose a tree to roost; worthy ministers choose a lord to serve. The Wise Lord is in the south, honoring the worthy and employing the humble, seeking talent as if thirsty, already holding the land of three prefectures, with elite troops and ample provisions. Sir, if you are willing to surrender, the people of the region south of the ridges will be spared the ravages of war, and the Ruans' descendants will surely find a day to rise in office. If you persist in delusion..."

I am very happy.

Ruansizong is listening, and I am very happy.

I want to lift my head and gauge the other's thoughts.

But I didn't expect that my head would hurt even more than I thought.

The blood oozing from my mouth and nose weighed me down; I had barely risen a little when blood trickled slowly from the corner of my mouth, forming a thin red line that fell onto the blue bricks.

I know, I know.

I know I must look quite miserable right now.

But everything is worth it.

Thus, I still spat out the latter half of the sentence:

"If you persist in delusion..."

"When the northern dynasty's cavalry rides south, jade and stone will burn together; sir, even if you do not spare your own life, won't you at least think of... your other grandsons?"

Exactly.

Exactly.

Ruansizong can bear a grudge against me for years over the loss of a grandson, yet he is not without other grandsons.

After uttering that final sentence, which he had weighed for a long time, his expression finally changed.

The violent fury he had just shown was like a bucket of cold water poured over it, now receding point by point from between his brows and eyes.

His gaunt face was no longer tense, his white beard no longer trembling; instead, there was an extremely slow, almost visible tightening.

He lowered his eyes, fingertips resting on the armrest, thin and withered like an old pen laid on a brush holder.

He remained silent for a long time, for a long time.

When he lifted his gaze again, the chill in his eyes had mostly faded, finally revealing a hint of the benevolent Confucian demeanor unique to scholars.

Smart people speak without needing many words.

As long as there is a crack, as long as there is a fissure as fine as a mosquito's wing, naturally someone will weigh the pros and cons.

He looked at me and finally spoke.

His voice was not loud, nor carried anger, merely warm and faint:

"You came well prepared."

"However, since you can be subdued, that person must have some skill... allow me to straighten my attire and present my credentials; the day after tomorrow I will pay my respects before you."

The day after tomorrow, I will pay my respects.

Although he did not outright say he would willingly join my retinue, we still need to meet first...

That already counts as loosening his lips!

I don't know, and I barely remember how I came out of that door, or how I made it back to Dun Cheng before dark.

All I know is that when night fell again, I saw Afang.

Afang saw my appearance, seemed greatly shocked, and even dropped the book in her hand.

I wanted to tell him, don't startle like that, lest we disturb the Wife Master.

I wanted to tell him, quickly get me a set of clean clothes.

I wanted to tell him, quickly prepare to deal with Ruansizong.

But I don't know why.

When these words rose from my throat, they left only a sentence repeating over and over.

I saw Afang's eyes widen little by little, a reaction he had never shown before.

I tilted my head and listened several times before I realized I was saying:

"Afang..."

"Afang... I want to eat eggs."

?? Presenting credentials and paying a visit: the 'credential' refers to a visiting card. The phrase means holding a visiting card to go pay a visit. This is the formal classical wording used by juniors or those of lower status to visit their elders, by prominent families to visit notables, or by guests to visit hosts.

? In this chapter, Ruansizong still does not know who Chinu's master is, so this is actually very formal and shows respect.

? So, Chinu... is actually truly happy.

? Deduct 0 points, please let Ah Nu eat eggs!