Chapter 232

The bright midday sun had gradually dimmed, no longer blinding, and the curtain in the clinic's office was left with only a narrow slit, through which a sliver of light fell onto the desk.

After the temperature began to drop, the office's air conditioning was turned on; the heating was ample, yet Loki felt a sensation he had never experienced before—the cold unique to ordinary humans.

His lips hung downward, his mouth unopened, yet he forced a few words through his clenched teeth: "... top."

"People always overestimate their psychological resilience, believing they can remain calm when facing a certain answer, but it's truly difficult."

Loki stared at him without speaking; Asgardians always possess a classical beauty, and Loki's brow ridge was deep, his contours sharp like a blade—when the shadow fully covered his eyes, he looked both cold and profound.

"I have many angles from which to analyze this issue, to show you where this mindset comes from and how to resolve it..."

Shiler's words took a turn: "... ut it comes at a fee."

Loki's expression was icy; he stood up, yet felt a resistance within his body. Venom whispered in his heart: "I advise you to reconsider—this might be a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity."

"Don't try to influence me, monster."

"If you're going to take out your anger on me..." Venom's voice carried an unexpected calm: "then let me tell you—you can't go anywhere even if you leave here, orphan."

"Are you planning to face Thor with this mindset? To ask him those stupid questions whose answers you already know, or are you truly going to beg him like a tail-wagging dog, asking if he even loves you?"

"... said, enough!"

"Calm down." Shiler's words pulled Loki back to reality. He said: "I charge dearly, but I guarantee it's more effective than you imagine."

"More importantly, I believe you currently lack the means to pay, so I'll charge this to your brother—he's the heir of Asgard."

"... hen let's begin." Loki sat back down.

"Let's look at this problem from another angle." Shiler made a gesture as if setting something aside. He said: "You already know deep down that you're jealous of Thor—let's carefully analyze this emotion."

"Now, imagine—if you were Thor, how would it be?"

"How would it be?" Loki asked: "... ow else could it be?"

"Don't rush. Listen. Suppose you're Odin's eldest son, the heir of Asgard, raised under Odin's constant attention—no matter what trouble you cause, he never scolds you harshly..."

"He..." Loki forced himself to calm, then stepped into this imagined scenario.

"Imagine yourself in Thor's place: from childhood, you're the center of attention—Odin values you, Frigg adores you, your peers revere you..."

As Shiler spoke, Loki sank into the vision.

When the bonfire blazed, the arena's roars grew deafening. He stood in the front row, then leapt down onto the battlefield's center, receiving cheers and shouts from all sides—the crowd watched him with hopeful eyes, certain he would win.

Then he crossed the long Bridge of Asgard, entering the palace gates with joy and excitement. He stood tall, bathed in light, as Odin praised him lavishly and Frigg smiled with satisfaction.

He rode across the battlefields of the Nine Realms, undefeated, sweeping through enemies effortlessly, claiming victory after victory, and returning them to the All-Father, earning the awe of Asgard's people.

"So now—where is Thor?"

Shiler's words didn't break Loki's fantasy, only shifted his perspective. He saw—behind the cheering crowd—Thor standing there, watching him. When Loki returned to camp, Thor gazed at him from afar. After their roles and viewpoints were completely reversed, Loki suddenly felt something strange.

"Now, continue—imagine doing all the things you've done, but now as Thor. He played many pranks on you, and they grew increasingly cruel, eventually becoming real sabotage..."

"No..." Loki's brow furrowed deeply. "I didn't..."

"Don't deny it—keep going. Look at yourself from Thor's perspective. How would he see all this?"

Instantly, the dream of glory shattered. Loki's arms trembled; his teeth clenched tight, and he forced out a few words: "I didn't see."

"Didn't see what?"

Suddenly, his shoulders relaxed, his jaw began to tremble slightly, then slowly steadied. "I didn't see those things."

"Really? Want to see them again?"

"No." Loki refused immediately.

"Then are you certain you didn't see them?"

Loki fell silent.

He remained silent for a long while, until he fully detached from that emotion, then said: "Perhaps... I saw them."

He paused again, his voice filled with hysterical breaths, then dissolved into trembling: "But I... didn't care."

"He knew—but didn't care, right?" Loki looked up at Shiler. Shiler twirled his pen and said: "You should've realized—your brother may be reckless, impulsive, single-minded, but he's not truly foolish. His intellect is normal, even gifted in some ways..."

"You've spent years together, nearly inseparable for a long time. You think you know him well—but he knows you just as well. Perhaps he's seen everything you've done, and simply chose not to care..."

"You wanted to escape this answer because, compared to being confronted directly or reported to Odin, his indifference hurts you more."

"Now ask yourself: all the things you've done—do you truly want to harm Thor, kill him, replace him? Or are you simply seeking more attention?"

"I..." Loki instinctively wanted to deny it. "Don't joke—I'd never want his attention? He has no brains—he's always been nothing but a brute..."

"Is that so? Then why, when I asked you how Thor sees Loki, did you refuse to voice that answer?"

Loki fell silent again, but no longer trembled—only remained frozen in the same posture.

"He probably really didn't care." Loki's voice grew breathier, the words swallowed by a sigh. He offered a self-deprecating smile: "At least as a child, my pranks were never subtle—I was just teasing him."

"I remember, several times, Thor's companions saw it was me, and grew even more hostile toward me—but Thor never said a word."

"I knew he wasn't blind..." Loki's tone grew puzzled. "Then why did I believe so firmly he never saw?"

"Perhaps because you couldn't accept that he saw—and simply chose not to care," Shiler said.

Loki fell silent.

"Now, let's add one more condition: you remain you—your current appearance, physique, strength, abilities—but you're still Odin's favorite eldest son, heir to Asgard..."

Before Shiler finished, Loki interrupted: "No, that's impossible—I..."

"Asgard would never have an heir like me. My physical strength is too weak..."

"I'm not Odin, this isn't a coronation, and my words don't matter."

"It's just a hypothetical. Since it's all hypothetical anyway, why bother with logic?"

Loki had no reply, only nodded.

"Alright, as you said, you have many flaws—some even fatal, like lacking the Asgardian pride of physical might. Odin sees them. Asgardians see them. Yet you still became heir. Odin favors you. No matter what trouble you cause, he clears it up for you..."

"In this scenario, how would Thor see you?"

"He..." Loki seemed to have a full sentence ready, but the first word died on his tongue.

"Don't doubt what you're thinking—Thor would envy you, too. However little, that emotion must exist."

Shiler made another gesture: "You probably often think: Thor has so many flaws—he acts without thought, charges blindly, never considers consequences—he's an irrational fool."

"But if roles were reversed, Thor might think: you're so weak you can't even lift a relic, you can't lead in battle, you can't set an example as a general—you lack Asgardian courage..."

"See? The world works this way: when you can't be the other, can't walk in their shoes, you always think they're unworthy of their position."

"His flaws become magnified in your eyes, and you use them to fantasize: if I were in his place, I'd do better."

"But when you truly take his place, your own flaws will be magnified too—and whether your prized strengths can handle the troubles they bring remains unknown."

"So?" Loki looked at Shiler. "Are you saying even if I sat in Thor's place, I couldn't do better than him?"

Shiler shook his head. "No. I'm telling you: your jealousy, your resentment toward your father's unfairness, your belief that Asgardians are blind—these emotions are completely normal."

"If you and Thor swapped places, these emotions would still exist. Thor may lack your emotional subtlety, but he's certainly not immune to them."

"If you don't believe me, look at him now. In a way, your positions have already swapped. Do you truly think Thor feels no envy over your sudden promotion? Do you believe he's so magnanimous he doesn't care that Odin gave him your glory?"

"Since he feels envy and resentment too, you two are no different. These negative emotions aren't signs of narrow-mindedness or madness—they're simply human."

"I made these hypotheticals..." Shiler paused, took a sip of water, then continued: "... o tell you that the tangled mess of emotions inside you—jealousy, resentment, shock, confusion, bewilderment, helplessness—is utterly common."

"So don't make self-destructive conclusions—like Thor and Odin are noble, righteous men, while you're a dark, vile creature hiding in shadows to vent negativity, or worse—fantasizing about inflicting this pain on others..."

Shiler set down his cup and looked into Loki's eyes: "I just called you a dog chasing meat scraps—but the truth is, if you put a collar on Thor, he'd chase even harder."