Chapter 346: Pig Squeal Rock (Three-in-One)

Two veteran mountain runners accompanied Lord Xu, fully versed in the Human Kitchen Hag's various tricks.

Such as the meat fragrance drifting for three li.

Gao Guanzi caught two "insects" and stuffed them into Lord Xu's nostrils.

Thus, he would remain unaffected by that scent.

Bai Laoyan further emphasized to Lord Xu: the Human Kitchen Hag's "rules" hinge on the single character "kitchen."

She opens a shop in the mountains; whoever comes is a guest.

Therefore, she must also observe certain rules common to restaurant owners.

The more the Human Kitchen Hag adheres to these rules, the firmer the foundation of her own power becomes.

Thus, Xu Yuan dealt with the Human Kitchen Hag by citing such tactics as "no restaurant allows guests to chat idly" and "your shop never forbade guests from bringing their own fine wine."

Xu Yuan directly blasted the Human Kitchen Hag with "Fu Zhong Huo" because it was time to tear off the mask.

Once that dish was served, he would certainly not eat it.

That would violate the shop's rules: you come to my shop without spending, yet you try to peddle your own wine here?

Damn it!

So, after Xu Yuan clarified everything regarding "Ghost Must Wood," he hesitated no longer, directly drugged all her guests, and struck at the Human Kitchen Hag.

Moreover, there was another very important point:

Precisely now was the critical moment for cooking this dish of the Human Kitchen Hag.

It was about to be taken out of the pot.

This meant that if the ingredients sat on the fire a moment longer, they would become tough.

And this dish would be ruined.

The Human Kitchen Hag flew into a rage: this guest had indeed come to smash the place!

I prepared a dish for them with such care.

The ingredients were freshly slaughtered, incredibly fresh.

Yet he refuses to eat it!

Worse still, he actually drugged the other guests; if this spreads, other evil spirits will think I run a black shop.

Is this tolerable, or is it intolerable?

The Human Kitchen Hag dropped the pot in her hand—but hesitated for a critical moment.

She could not bear to waste that pot of deliciousness.

If not taken out now, it would become tough.

In that instant of delay, the fire surged violently into the kitchen.

Amidst the flames, a turtle shell flew back into Xu Yuan's hand.

Xu Yuan examined the turtle shell and interpreted the divination: Great fortune today!

The flames subsequently engulfed the Human Kitchen Hag.

The Human Kitchen Hag was a fifth-rate evil spirit, merely on the weaker side within the fifth rate.

This level had already brushed against the threshold of "going on the street."

The sixth-rate Fu Zhong Huo could still inflict great harm upon her.

The flames instantly burned her clothes completely clean.

Revealing her true form hidden beneath the cook's attire.

It was a plump, obese black rat with a bloated body.

Immediately, all the rat fur on her body was singed off.

This "mistake" was also due to the merit of the "Eight Directions Injury Sha."

The Human Kitchen Hag let out a loud cry, disregarded that pot of "Stewed Human Heads," flipped the entire pot over, and angrily cursed: "Do you think I have no fire?"

She lifted the stove and splashed it toward Xu Yuan.

Inside the stove were many burning coals; with a whoosh, they shot toward Xu Yuan like a hail of fire meteors.

A cook can, of course, control fire.

Xu Yuan employed the movement technique from the "Dragon Form Art," twisting and dodging within the shop.

All the fire meteors missed.

The Human Kitchen Hag, however, let out a wail of agony.

Hidden within the surging Fu Zhong Huo were three hairpins.

This set of fifth-rate artisan items pierced the Human Kitchen Hag's chest in a "pin" formation.

The Human Kitchen Hag's flesh was thick and heavy, so the damage was not great.

But immediately, the silver bells on the three hairpins shook together.

Ding-ding-dong-dong...

The power that tore at the soul made the Human Kitchen Hag frenzied; amidst continuous roars, she grabbed the silver chains behind the three hairpins, yanked them out with force, then tore a piece of flesh from the corpse of the person just there, wrapped it around the pins, and swallowed it in one bite.

"Human Kitchen": as long as it is paired with human flesh, it can eat anything!

It can digest anything!

But the effect of the silver bells made her somewhat dazed.

The flames continued to surge violently inward.

Under the cover of the flames, that set of counting rods quietly fell into the kitchen.

They were densely packed, sticking into the ground, the stove, and the pillars.

While the Human Kitchen Hag dodged the flames, she accidentally stepped on one of the counting rods.

The sole of his foot was instantly pierced through.

"Squeak—"

It let out another scream of agony.

Xu Yuan then knew the two mountain runners had told him the truth: this evil spirit's strength did not lie in its physical body.

The weapon on his person most suitable for executing the Human-Cooking Hag was, of course, the Tiger-Headed Cleaver.

But now was not the most suitable moment to deploy this national treasure of the dynasty...

Suddenly, Xu Yuan felt something was not quite right.

A fierce hot wind surged from behind him.

Xu Yuan clumsily threw himself forward.

A piece of burning charcoal, wreathed in blood-flame, slammed past Xu Yuan's back.

Xu Yuan immediately felt his entire back burning with pain.

His clothes and a layer of skin were burned away!

Without hesitation, Xu Yuan wrapped himself in the Skin Pill.

The defense of this body then became comparable to that of a Wild Boar Tusk.

That charcoal meteor, having struck Xu Yuan's back, continued its momentum and slammed into a companion of Deng Linyue.

The burning charcoal directly blasted into the body.

Blood-flame erupted, and in the blink of an eye, it burned that person to ash.

Xu Yuan's eyes rolled...

The Human-Cooking Hag controlled all the burning charcoals, pursuing Xu Yuan everywhere.

Xu Yuan expanded his movement technique again.

This movement technique was like a loach or a spirit snake, most suitable for dodging such scattered attacks.

While dodging, Xu Yuan unknowingly arrived beside one of the evil spirits.

Then, timing it perfectly, his upper body suddenly bent sharply to one side as if it were a rope.

A piece of burning charcoal flew past with a whoosh, slamming into the body of that evil spirit.

It was the Mud Slime Ghost.

Blood-flame erupted suddenly, quickly igniting the corpse-oil covering the entire body of this evil spirit!

The Mud Slime Ghost woke in excruciating pain, but no matter what it did, it could not extinguish the flames on its body; screaming, it rushed out, wanting to jump into the river.

The Human-Cooking Hag screamed: "You haven't paid yet!"

The originally open shop doors automatically closed with a series of snaps.

The Mud Slime Ghost crashed headlong into them and was bounced back.

The Human-Cooking Hag stepped forward, wanting to collect the debt from the Mud Slime Ghost, but ended up stepping on a counting rod again.

"Aaaah—" It let out a scream of pain.

The Human-Cooking Hag was thoroughly enraged; gritting her teeth, she roared: "Once you enter my shop, you must spend money to eat my food!"

Xu Yuan immediately felt that a violent change was occurring around him.

This change originated from the Human-Cooking Hag, yet it was because she had broken her own "rules," turning this shop into a "black shop"!

For the Human-Cooking Hag herself, doing so would have huge long-term consequences.

But after becoming a black shop, her power in the present moment surged dramatically!

The pot of "Stewed Human Heads" that had just been ruined automatically fell into the soup basin, floating and flying toward Xu Yuan.

Xu Yuan could no longer deploy his movement technique.

He was suppressed by the power within the "black shop."

As long as he remained in this shop, he could not break free from this suppression.

If he truly ate this dish, he would then be completely trapped within the Human-Cooking Hag's rules, able only to hand over his life as payment for the meal to the Human-Cooking Hag.

Before the soup bowl even arrived, the other burning charcoals were already chasing and blasting toward him.

Suppressed and unable to dodge, the burning charcoals struck his body one after another.

Boom, boom, boom...

Clusters of blood-flame surged upward.

Fortunately, protected by the Skin Pill, Xu Yuan spat out a mouthful of blood but could still hold on.

Inside his body, the Medicine Pill took effect, rapidly healing Xu Yuan's injuries.

But the Human-Cooking Hag immediately sensed a force opposing her black shop.

Xu Yuan took out the Dog-Head Gold.

This place is my stall.

However, the "Merchant Law" was only of the sixth rank; it barely withstood the "black shop," slowing the soup bowl's speed slightly, yet it still floated toward Xu Yuan, unstoppable.

Xu Yuan also opened his mouth.

The soup bowl reached his face, poured into his mouth, and slid directly down into his stomach.

The Human-Cooking Hag was overjoyed.

But then she heard Xu Yuan say: "Truly a black shop, forcing a sale! You want this life? Here it is."

The Human-Cooking Hag reached out, her arm lengthening, grabbed Xu Yuan's neck, and pulled him over; looking closely, she saw it was not Xu Yuan, but Deng Linyue!

Xu Yuan used the Dog-Head Gold to delay the black shop's effect, then deployed the "Dragon Spits Mirage," placing Deng Linyue in front of himself as a shield.

The turtle-shell divination foretold great fortune.

The "Eight Directions of Injury and Evil" was secretly at work.

The Human Kitchen Hag's mistake this time was failing to see through the "Dragon Spits Mirage."

The Human Kitchen Hag flew into a rage, yet felt some confusion: How was I deceived by this brat?

From the wounds all over its body, foul blood kept gushing out.

The Human Kitchen Hag could not help but feel a sense of weakness.

It felt something was wrong again: This injury should not make me feel so weak in such a short time...

But there was no time for it to seek an answer.

A flesh-scraping knife appeared in the Human Kitchen Hag's hand; with a swish, it sliced a strip of flesh from Deng Linyue's body.

Then it handed it to Xu Yuan.

"Today's banquet begins. The third dish: Raw Human Slices."

Its arm stretched longer and longer, straight out until it was right before Xu Yuan.

In a black shop, one must eat.

Once you eat, your life is in my grasp.

I won't tangle with you; I'll just go with the flow and thrust the knife straight into your mouth!

Deng Linyue, struck by the knife, woke in excruciating pain, yet the Human Kitchen Hag held his neck, leaving him unable to cry out.

The pain made his eyeballs seem ready to pop out.

Yet in the next instant, his left eyeball truly popped out!

This was a Strange Pill.

When Xu Yuan used the Dragon Spits Mirage, he simultaneously employed the "Merchant's Law," using this Strange Pill as payment to buy his left eye.

This Strange Pill was then hidden inside Deng Linyue's left eye socket.

Rotten Strange Technique—Activate!

Gaze upon the target for the span of two finger-snaps, and the body becomes infected.

Four finger-snaps, and the soul becomes infected.

The span of two finger-snaps had long been reached.

The five wounds on the Human Kitchen Hag's body rapidly rotted!

A seventh-grade Strange Pill is hard-pressed to inflict major damage on a fifth-grade Strange Abomination.

But it was already injured, allowing the Rotten Strange Technique to strike while the iron was hot.

The span of four finger-snaps had also arrived; the Human Kitchen Hag's soul began to show tiny signs of rot, spreading continuously!

Just now, the silver bells of the Three Strands Hairpin had already inflicted damage upon its soul.

Again, it struck while the iron was hot!

And under the effect of "Ghost Doctor Steals Life," the damage to both body and soul was amplified by another layer.

The Human Kitchen Hag's fat body swayed several times.

It felt something was even more wrong.

Why am I so weak?

How could I fall for a Strange Technique so easily?

It lowered its head and saw that Strange Pill, flying into a rage: So you were the one behind this!

The Human Kitchen Hag tightened its grip, snapping Deng Linyue's neck.

From within Deng Linyue's sleeve, a thin rope suddenly emerged.

With a whoosh, it coiled around the Human Kitchen Hag.

The beast-tendon rope thinned to the width of a hair, winding around in circles, tightening more and more, digging deeply into the Human Kitchen Hag's flesh!

Then, from the other sleeve, three swords flew out.

They stabbed precisely into the wounds previously made by the Three Strands Hairpin!

Having eaten two dishes, Deng Linyue's life was already in the Human Kitchen Hag's hands.

Once the Human Kitchen Hag took him, it would not be overly cautious.

Xu Yuan had hidden all his killing moves on Deng Linyue's body.

The Dragon-Slaying Sword does not counter the Human Kitchen Hag, and the Sword Pill is only sixth-grade.

But the wounds had already been opened by the Three Strands Hairpin.

And the Rotten Strange Technique had struck while the iron was hot.

These three swords thus pierced in with ease.

The Three Strands Hairpin was short; the wounds it caused were not fatal to the Human Kitchen Hag.

But with these three swords piercing in, the effect was vastly different.

"Squeak—"

The Human Kitchen Hag screamed in agony, its whiskers trembling uncontrollably.

Yet the hand holding the knife had already reached before Xu Yuan!

Xu Yuan must open his mouth; once he opens it, that knife will surely thrust in!

Xu Yuan had already taken out his begging bowl.

"The Lotus Fallen" began to sing.

Have mercy, give me something to eat!

What Xu Yuan sought to beg was precisely this slice of "Raw Human" on the knife's tip!

If he could beg for this flesh-scraping knife itself, that would do too.

Tortoise-shell divination: today is extremely auspicious; let this my lord's wish come true!

The Human Kitchen Old Woman endured the pain in her body, her knife-wielding hand still thrusting forward.

For once it reached Xu Yuan's mouth, everything would end.

This wild boy, appearing from who knows where, had actually forced her to this point—truly hateful!

Yet she had still underestimated the great evil spirit within Ghost Wushan!

Dozens of recipes instantly sprang to the Human Kitchen Old Woman's mind.

Kill this wild boy; I must thoroughly enjoy his flesh and blood, wasting not a single bit.

Suddenly, the slice of "living person" on the knife tip vanished.

The Human Kitchen Old Woman froze, for it had disappeared so inexplicably that she couldn't grasp what had happened.

That "slice of living person" had fallen into the other's hand, into that broken bowl!

Xu Yuan looked down and smiled.

Today is indeed most auspicious; all wishes come true!

The Human Kitchen Old Woman flew into a rage, thrusting her knife forward with a sudden lunge—

Xu Yuan summoned the carriage to block in front of him.

Sss!

The carriage was pierced through!

Xu Yuan broke out in a cold sweat.

Fortunately, he hadn't relied on the Skin Pill to withstand that strike.

The Skin Pill's defensive power was roughly equivalent to a wild boar's tusk.

But the Human Kitchen Old Woman's knife must have been extremely sharp!

Its physical body was not particularly formidable; to securely hold a fifth-rate position, its offensive killing power must have been ruthless.

Xu Yuan felt the timing was just right, retracted the Begging Bowl, and with a mighty shout summoned the Tiger-Head Guillotine.

"Open the guillotine—"

The gleaming blade of the guillotine rose.

Now was the true moment to wield this dynasty's suppression artifact.

It was not that merely summoning the guillotine would surely behead the evil spirit.

The Human Kitchen Old Woman was too strong.

She had the power to prevent Xu Yuan from ever raising the guillotine.

Even if he did raise it, she could contend against the Heaven and Earth's Grand Power that sought to bind her for a long while.

If Xu Yuan took too long to raise the guillotine, he would collapse from exhaustion and drop it.

That would be even worse; the Human Kitchen Old Woman would seize that opportunity to kill him.

Therefore, whenever the Three Yamen of Strange Affairs employed the guillotine, it was always a group acting in coordination.

One person served as the main force to lift the guillotine, while others besieged the evil spirit, coordinating with the Heaven and Earth's Grand Power to press it beneath the blade.

Xu Yuan, being alone, needed to find a way to exhaust the Human Kitchen Old Woman.

He needed to leave her so severely injured that she could not interfere with his opening of the guillotine and lacked the strength to resist the Heaven and Earth's Grand Power.

The Human Kitchen Old Woman was startled.

She never expected this wild boy to be carrying a Tiger-Head Guillotine!

She swallowed Deng Linyue in one gulp while simultaneously reaching out to grab the others.

The more people she ate, the faster she recovered.

Unfortunately, it was already too late.

The three swords in her chest were still drilling into her body!

All the tally sticks flew up together, piercing into her body.

The Heaven and Earth's Grand Power bound her, pressing her down beneath the guillotine.

Xu Yuan pulled down with all his might.

Crack—

A huge, fat rat head was severed and fell.

In an instant, a chorus of ghostly wails and wolf howls erupted outside the shop!

In the river water, in the grass, among the bamboo groves, a cacophony of rustling sounds filled the air.

Countless water rats, earth rats, and bamboo rats darted out from everywhere.

Black, gray, and brown, they covered the ground in dense masses, making anyone who saw them feel their scalp prickle.

Screaming and wailing, they charged toward the restaurant.

These were all the descendants of the Human Kitchen Old Woman.

The restaurant had been sealed by the Human Kitchen Old Woman; these rats ranged from the size of wild rabbits to the size of wild boars.

Bang, bang, bang—they continuously rammed against the outer walls and door panels.

Without the Human Kitchen Old Woman's control, the doors and windows were soon smashed.

The rats' eyes were blood-red, drool streaming from their mouths.

Xu Yuan spat a mouthful of Fu Zhong Huo.

The burning rats shrieked in agony.

Yet, even as they burned entirely, they persisted in charging forward, struggling to throw themselves onto the Human Kitchen Old Woman's corpse and begin gnawing!

Xu Yuan then understood.

By consuming the Human Kitchen Old Woman's flesh and blood, they could transform into great evil spirits.

They only gnawed a few bites before being burned to ash by the fire in their bellies.

It also ignited the corpse of the Human-Cooking Hag.

"Hoo—!"

"Hoo—!"

"Hoo—!"

Xu Yuan spat several mouthfuls of fire; the Sixth-Rank fire was irresistible to these rats, and before long, they were reduced to a pile of ash.

Xu Yuan rested briefly, then the Sword Pill flew out and severed the other two evil spirits that were still unconscious.

He retracted all his Artifacts and Longzhu Waidan.

Then he grabbed the two companions of Deng Linyue, flashed out of the restaurant, and finally spat another mouthful of fire inside.

The restaurant was already burning, and now the flames roared even fiercer.

From within the shop came a strange, creaking sound.

Certain things in the kitchen, used for years by the Human-Cooking Hag, had also become evil spirits; this fire burned them all clean.

When those rats burst forth, Bai Laoyan and Gao Guanzi immediately rushed over from a distance.

They happened to meet my lord Xu emerging from the shop.

Xu Yuan looked behind them: "Where is Da Fu?"

Da Fu had not followed.

The vast swarms of giant rats had terrified Da Fu.

It had cowered in the hiding bushes, too afraid to come out.

So many giant rats; even if I ate until I burst, I couldn't finish them all.

Can't provoke them, can't provoke them...

Gao Guanzi bowed to Xu Yuan: "My lord, I must offend you, but the worms in your nose must be removed as soon as possible."

Xu Yuan tilted his head back: "Just do it."

Gao Guanzi took a small tool that looked like a pair of fishhooks.

In his other hand, he held ready a small bottle of medicinal powder.

He inserted the tool into the nostril and hooked the two worms, slowly pulling them outward.

Normally at this stage, the worms would have already grown into the nasal cavity and would be extremely reluctant to come out.

It is said that if they stay in the nostril for more than a day, forcibly pulling them out would drag the entire brain out with them!

If they refuse to come out, that medicinal powder must be used.

This substance is extremely difficult to formulate; normally, Gao Guanzi would not be willing to use it.

Those two worms had been inside my lord's nose for nearly an hour; they must be very difficult... Gao Guanzi thought this, having prepared the powder, but with a gentle pull, the two worms obediently slid out.

These were strange worms that looked like luffa sponges, only half the size of a little fingernail.

Once pulled out, they fell to the ground and struggled to wriggle into the bushes.

It seemed as though they were fleeing.

Gao Guanzi wore an expression of utter surprise.

Xu Yuan asked: "What is wrong?"

"N-nothing." Gao Guanzi dared not ask anything, dared not say anything.

Xu Yuan knew perfectly well; this was the effect of "Hundred Taboos Forbidden."

The raging fire burned the shop completely clean.

The cloth banner hanging on the long pole outside, reading "Cooking Life Fragrance," also turned to ash.

The stone walls crashed down with a boom.

They waited a full hour before the fire finally extinguished.

Xu Yuan entered the fire-swept area and first retrieved the three hairpins that the Human-Cooking Hag had eaten.

However, this Artifact had suffered severe contamination.

It was already somewhat uncontrollable.

Holding them in his hand, Xu Yuan clearly felt them wriggling incessantly.

The texture was no longer like metal, but a slippery, disgusting sensation.

It was as if he were holding a leech in his hand.

They needed to be refined immediately.

Then Xu Yuan searched again and found four good pieces of material.

One blood-red wolf tooth.

One insect limb, arm-length.

A lump of pitch-black oily clay.

Finally, a piece of ghastly white bone.

The first three were Sixth-Rank; the fourth was Fifth-Rank.

Xu Yuan happily stuffed them into his Xing Guo Zi and stored them away.

Especially the last piece of bone; holding it, Xu Yuan could feel the immense power contained within.

The Human-Cooking Hag possessed many powerful sinister techniques.

He was very eager to see how many types had condensed into this piece of material.

Xu Yuan searched the fire-swept area a while longer and finally found Deng Linyue's spider web.

There were also Deng Linyue's sword pill and some Longzhu Waidan.

Put the others away for now and look at them later; this spiderweb, however, was taken into hand.

Bai Laoyan kicked the two unconscious fellows with his foot and asked, "How should we deal with them?"

"Wake them up, and I will ask again."

The two were revived, their spirits still unsettled.

Xu Yuan expanded the carriage, treating it as a room.

Then he planted the lantern outside and dragged the two inside for questioning.

Naturally, the two answered everything without reservation.

But they did not know much; they only confessed that Deng Linyue was from Shunhua City and was a famous Rank Dan Xiu in the city.

He had deep connections with many people in the Shanhe Office of Shunhua City.

Xu Yuan handed the people over to Gao Guanzi: "Take them back to the village; I will deal with them when I return."

"Very well." Gao Guanzi felt in his heart that this method of handling things was not good.

He was a man of the mountains and never held back his hand.

But my lord was, after all, an official, and could not be as unrestrained as they were; he could understand that.

Gao Guanzi led the people away.

He had his own idea.

There were some things my lord was not convenient to do, so I would do them for him.

Not far to the west from here, there was another great evil.

It was an old customer of the Human Kitchen Old Woman.

The two great evils were so close because one knew how to be human, and the other loved to eat.

Gao Guanzi did not act personally either; he simply did not warn the two men when stepping into that great evil's territory.

They walked in and never came out again.

Gao Guanzi turned and left; his ears twitched, and he clearly heard Dafu's footsteps.

This "ba-ba-ba" sound was far too distinctive.

Gao Guanzi caught up in not much time.

"My lord..." Gao Guanzi looked ashamed: "I am unworthy of my lord's trust; in a moment of carelessness, the two were eaten by the evil."

Xu Yuan glanced at him and asked no more.

"Enough, let us go."

A little over an hour later, they arrived at the mountain peak opposite Pig-Call Rock.

This massive rock was over a hundred zhang high, its shape extremely strange, with four huge Kong Dong on top.

The reason it was named "Pig-Call Rock" was not because its shape resembled a pig, but because when the wind blew through those four Kong Dong on the Shanfeng, it would emit a shrill sound like a pig being slaughtered.

Standing here, one could clearly see everything below.

Indeed, there were no trees.

The entire Pig-Call Rock, from top to bottom and out to five li around, was a bare, barren expanse.

There was not even a single blade of grass.

"Strange..." Xu Yuan muttered to himself.

After thinking for a moment, he took out the folded letter, wrote a line, and sent it for Jiao to come meet him at Pig-Call Rock.

After writing, he waited a moment; seeing no response from Jiao, he put it away and kept it in his bosom for now.

"Is there a place nearby where we can spend the night?" Xu Yuan asked the two veteran mountain runners.

Bai Laoyan was about to answer when Gao Guanzi suddenly changed color, raised his hand, and made a gesture for silence.

Bai Laoyan and Xu Yuan then fell silent.

Gao Guanzi pricked up his ears and listened carefully for a while.

He immediately pulled the two men up and hid them in a dense, large tree.

"Someone is coming!"

"The sound of Pig-Call Rock is somewhat noisy; I only heard those people when they were two li away."

The three remained motionless on the tree, holding their breath.

Not long after, four people appeared, each carrying a bamboo basket on their back, moving with agile and light steps; they passed under the tree without pausing for a moment, heading straight for Pig-Call Rock.

Arriving at the foot of the rock, they took down the bamboo baskets and carefully released some things from inside.

(End of this chapter)