Chapter 746: Support and Waiting

Support and Waiting

March 26: Perseverance and Waiting

I., Fallen flowers and flowing water, spring has gone.

"Worldly feelings are thin, human feelings are wicked———this is the poem of 6 Fangweng's former wife Tang Wan." "Worldly feelings are thin, human feelings are wicked," this blood-and-tear-filled cry makes one feel chilled and heart tremble. 6 You and Tang Wan were originally a deeply loving couple, yet this loving couple could not grow old together; this pair of mandarin ducks, on their flight toward life's destination, were torn apart by the fickle worldly feelings and cruel human feelings.

The painful experiences, the immense repression and dissatisfaction, the infinite pain and resentment, as well as that helpless, bone-deep longing of love, are all hidden in Tang Wan's sorrowful heart; at this very moment they all turn into the cries of "Worldly feelings are thin, human feelings are wicked"—tears like sobs, words like blood, the accusation and shout.

But how helpless and weak this frail woman's accusation and shout are: past years cannot be reclaimed, that "Worldly feelings, human feelings are wicked" cannot be changed, that "Those who abandon me cannot be kept from yesterday"...

"Heartbreak Bridge below, spring waves green—once the stunning shadow came." How much love, how much hate, how much helplessness, all flow away with fallen flowers and flowing water as spring departs; heaven and earth may meet again...

II., The crimson rain on the petals

"Rain sends the evening, flowers fall easily———the hazy dusk crawls over the earth, what more is there to say? Even if you pat the railing all around, no one will, this feeling of ascending."

Rain, falling softly in the dim twilight; the beautiful petals, blown by wind and rain, wither one by one; the crimson rain on the petals—is it the tear of that frail woman's sorrow?

Faced with the wind's sound, rain's sound, only the sound of falling flowers in the wind and rain, to whom should this heart's sorrow and resentment confide? Who would listen to the frail woman's confiding in the wind and rain?

Is it Heaven? Yet Heaven remains silent; is it the Earth? This Earth is cold as ice; is it the flowers in the wind and rain? The flowers in the wind and rain drift everywhere, helplessly falling...... "For five hundred years tears have poured like a waterfall, for five hundred years tears have dripped like candles. Endless tears cannot wash away the filth, unceasing passion's flame cannot be extinguished, shame cannot be dispelled. Our fleeting, illusory existence—where exactly should we find rest?"

IV., Lonely stars and the solitary moon

"Dawn wind dries, tear stains remain———the rain that fell abundantly at dusk, after a night of torment, had ceased by morning; but the tears that flowed at dusk, by morning their traces still hung on the weary face; such sleepless nights, such unbearable pain, have happened more than once. Since that happy marriage was torn apart, Tang Wan's tears have flowed from winter to spring and again from spring to winter, truly 'Endless tears cannot wash away the filth, unquenchable passion's flame cannot be extinguished, shame cannot be dispelled'!!"

Leaning alone on the railing, facing the vast night sky, how she wishes to confide her painful longing to her beloved. Yet reality is unfeeling, human relations are treacherous; that unfeeling reality, that treacherous human relation, does not allow her to confide. She can only bury that endless longing and sorrow deep in her heart—

Beloved one, now this life has no hope of reunion, nor even the whispered words under flowers and moon; all this has vanished so cleanly and thoroughly———is all this fate's toy with me?

Those beautiful times will never return; looking back, only the lonely stars in the sky and the solitary moon remain. Our young hearts will never hope to reunite. Although the roads of this world are crowded, yet these crowded roads are lonely, for they are unloved. The time of being loved has already drifted far beyond the shore of years.........

"Who pushes me forward like fate? It is myself, striding forward with big steps behind me. I gradually realized———all my perseverance and waiting now, is it the pure love you gave me in your youth?"