Chapter 275: Dense and Thick Is My Self-Esteem

"Wang Ze: It's got nothing to do with the novel anymore, sigh, feeling a bit emo, the art of language is too hard."

"Lin Li: Then go jerk off."

After sending the cure-all reply, Lin Li went to eat.

After the meal, he continued excavating the "Qiankun Ring," and after consuming a few more spirit stones, the space had already been opened up to several dozen cubic centimeters, already able to hold quite a few small gadgets.

However, Lin Li also sensed that the further the space opening progressed, the harder it became; this was not good news.

When ten o'clock arrived, Lin Li stopped the work in his hands and prepared to sleep.

Tomorrow's physical examination institution opens at seven in the morning; although arriving a bit late wouldn't be a problem, for the sake of accurate test results, he needed to fast after ten o'clock tonight, and even abstain from water.

The physical examination was still necessary to get an accurate result — not because Lin Li was worried about his own physical health; in fact, his body, having been nourished by spiritual energy for nearly two months now, probably had no hidden ailments whatsoever and was healthier than anyone.

The real significance of getting the result was to know what his current physical functions looked like from the perspective of modern medicine.

With a private physical, he could request an encrypted report; even the exclusive consultant couldn't view it without his permission.

Was it pure health? Or was it an incomprehensible abnormality?

If the physical results showed an abnormality then, he would need to be careful in the future and try to avoid similar scenarios, because his body would only become more and more "strange," drifting further and further from ordinary people in the view of instruments.

But if there was no abnormality, only a display of health, then he would have no scruples in the future; even if the school organized physicals, he wouldn't need to think of reasons to avoid blood draws.

Sleep.

Waking up once, it was just past four; the set alarm hadn't even rung yet.

After persisting in early rising for two months, Lin Li's body had already formed a habit; recently, the number of times he woke up naturally was increasing.

Getting up no longer required Warden Da's motivation; he could rely on his own willpower — the scenery of Xiling at four o'clock, Lin Li had long since committed to memory.

How could this not count as a kind of inheritance of the Mamba Mentality?

Opening his phone, besides group chats and some NSFW stuff Bai Bufan forwarded to him, there was also a message from Wang Ze.

Two hours ago, sent at a bit past two.

"Wang Ze:

The closer the hand gets to the cock, the further health gets from me.

White fresh blood spurts out, rolling in this pitch-black night.

The moonlight is clear and bright, reflecting my dejected face.

Last night's me, my tonight.

Who can embrace me and sleep?"

"Wang Ze: Lin Li, can you keep me company for one? 'Sad' 'Sad'"

Dumbass.

Made Lin Li laugh.

Emo + sage time + NetEase Cloud = Great Sage Depressing Poet Immortal, forcing a sports student into this state, Senior Sister Qian, you did a good job.

Since Wang Ze liked to make friends through poetry, Lin Li replied with a poem too.

"Lin Li:

Keep you company for one,

No way,

Keep you company for a tube,

Can consider."

As everyone knows, as long as you know how to line-break, that's knowing how to write poetry.

After satisfactorily admiring his own poetry, Wang Ze didn't reply; looks like he slept. Lin Li tossed his phone on the bedside; today he didn't plan to go downstairs to cultivate, but to practice the Spiritual Energy Chapter at home.

After all, cultivating the Physical Body Chapter easily made one thirsty and hungry, unsuitable for cultivation before a physical.

Switching the "Xiling Light" title, Lin Li manifested a spirit stone and began cultivating.

Eyebrows raised — the effect of the 100% Martial Dao Talent boost was quite significant; he had just started practicing when Lin Li suddenly felt in his heart that his rehearsal of this technique was actually not in place, too rigidly following the technique without considering himself.

He could try some adjustments.

And with his few attempts, the speed of spiritual energy circulating in his body actually increased by a small notch all at once.

This was a permanent gain obtained in just a few dozen minutes!

So this is what it feels like to be a talent monster? Feels great.

There were still nearly forty days until the Task One deadline; this time he felt an even greater grasp.

After cultivating for an hour and a half, Lin Li rode his bike to school; Bai Bufan this time was already standing at the school gate waiting for him, no need to go arrest him in the dorm.

"Lin Li, I've finally realized that between people, there is no mutual understanding; we are all isolated islands, ravines of cognition flowing with the magma of language; humanity spends its life chasing reflections in a mirror corridor, yet forgets that it itself is the deepest cognitive prison."

After seeing Lin Li arrive, Bai Bufan spoke deeply.

Lin Li: "?"

Bro.

"What craziness are you spouting? Wang Ze turns into a poet, you turn into a philosopher? Did you jerk off last night too? That'll affect the physical results, right? Can't even hold it in?" Lin Li asked in astonishment.

"It's not that ah f**k!! I just realized one thing: a person can't even mutually understand their past self, so how can they mutually understand others?

Right now, towards last night's self who stayed up late, and yesterday's self who promised you to come for a physical together, just thinking about it makes me furious! Really want to land a big slap on them!

No, am I sick? On a weekend I get up at six for a physical? And it was voluntary? Woke up earlier than usual? F**k! So sleepy, so want to sleep..." Bai Bufan wailed in pain.

Lin Li laughed; so it was the usual dog barking. Then he encouraged: "Bufan, when you want to give up, why not persist a bit more? However painful the persistence is now, giving up later will be that much satisfying."

Bai Bufan, who thought it was chicken soup: "?"

Turns out it's anti-chicken soup?

"Lin Li, knowing you is the biggest radiation of my life; no wonder I've achieved nothing to this day, it's all thanks to your radiation." Bai Bufan laughed, giving Lin Li a thumbs up.

"A trivial effort," Lin Li politely waved his hand, then had an idea:

"Bufan, how about I give you a big slap in the face regularly from now on? That way, when you can't understand yourself in the future, you can treat this slap as if you slapped yourself, and vent your anger hard! It'll feel damn good."

There is no regret medicine in the world, but you can prepare in advance.

Bai Bufan: "... The one who feels damn good is your mother, hey!?"

Seeing Bai Bufan still yawning, the idea king Lin Li pondered for a moment, and had another idea on how to perk Bai Bufan up:

"Bufan, I have a method that should help you refresh yourself, want to give it a try?"

Bai Bufan didn't answer immediately, but instantly pulled away from Lin Li and assumed a defensive posture, in case he suffered a beating the next second.

"If you dare hit me, I'll call security."

"You hurt your bro's heart too much with this. I wasn't planning to harm you this time; this method is very famous, everyone acknowledges it." Seeing Bai Bufan guard against him from the bottom of his heart, Lin Li said dejectedly.

"You say it first, then I'll consider whether to try it." But Bai Bufan wouldn't lower his guard just because of a few words from Lin Li.

Lin Li sighed, but nodded.

Lin Li took out a folded piece of paper from his pocket, then tore it a bit, pinched it a bit, and handed it to Bai Bufan.

Although he didn't know why Lin Li would have blank paper in his pocket, seeing no extra movements and that it didn't look like a trap, Bai Bufan took it. Looking at the paper strip in his hand shaped like a 'cross', he asked in confusion:

"What's this? How does it refresh?"

"Just tie each hand to one side." Lin Li explained.

"What do you mean tie each hand... hmm?"

Bai Bufan: "(；o_o)?"

"Wait, which god are you invoking the hell!" Bai Bufan froze for a moment, then demanded sharply.

"Jesus." Lin Li answered as a matter of course.

"Hahahaha crap! Damn, today's merit is gone again!" Bai Bufan laughed and cursed.

Lin Li wasn't wrong; this is indeed the most famous and widely acknowledged refreshing method in the world.

Too bad it doesn't refresh the spirit.

But Lin Li's goal was indeed achieved; Bai Bufan laughed until he was spirited.

"I'll call a cab first." After laughing for a good while, Bai Bufan gave a thumbs up, then took out his phone.

Today's situation wasn't suitable for taking the bus; both were also afraid of running into that auntie from last time, so they took a taxi to the physical examination institution.

Arrived.

The institution is located inside a commercial building, occupying two whole floors; in Xiling it absolutely counts as a very large physical examination institution.

Although the whole building only has four elevators, at this time basically everyone is here for physical exams, so it's not too crowded.

Arriving at the corresponding floor, the elevator doors open, and you can see the reception desk of this institution named Ci Jian Physical Examination.

"Hello, are you here for a physical exam? Do you have your ID cards with you?" The front desk asked politely upon seeing Lin Li and Bai Bufan.

"We do."

Lin Li handed over his ID card.

"Are you Mr. Lin?" The front desk should have already seen the value of Lin Li's package; when she spoke again, her voice was even more gentle and respectful, "Please wait a moment."

"Sister Zhang! Mr. Lin is here!" Then the front desk called out to a woman standing not far away.

The woman immediately jogged over at the words, walked up to Lin Li and bowed slightly:

"Are you Mr. Lin? Hello hello, I am your dedicated consultant today, Zhang Ke Wu. You can call me Consultant Zhang, Little Zhang, or Sister Zhang. I can accompany you one-on-one throughout the physical exam. If you have any questions, you can ask me."

"Accompaniment isn't needed; that can be skipped, right?" Lin Li waved his hand upon hearing this.

Being called Mr. Lin sounds weird; Lin Li also isn't used to being attended to hand and foot by a woman of this age bracket.

Get an eighteen-year-old, thanks.

"Of course, it's entirely up to you!" Zhang Ke Wu nodded upon hearing this, then suggested: "Then let's add WeChat; if anything comes up you can contact me or your customer service at the first moment."

Lin Li didn't refuse this.

"Where do you usually feel you have more problems? Since I can't accompany you, I can give some suggestions for your upcoming process based on this, and have the doctors make some simple adjustments." After adding WeChat, the woman asked again.

Lin Li thought for a moment: "When taking exams at school."

"Oh, so you're a stu——(；o_o)?" Zhang Ke Wu's professional smile froze halfway through her words.

"Haha, Mr. Lin, you're so humorous~" After freezing for a moment, she laughed awkwardly.

"No physical problems, just coming for a physical exam for peace of mind." Lin Li replied with a smile.

"Okay okay, this is your examination form. Our physical exam process is: after reaching the corresponding department, you hand in the examination form first, then wait for the doctor to call your name. As a VIP, you enjoy queue-jumping privileges; the doctor will prioritize calling your name."

Zhang Ke Wu took it from the front desk and gave Lin Li a booklet; clearly only a few pages, yet it was specially bound.

"This is your VIP card. If you need it, with this card you can go to the VIP lounge on the second floor to rest. That side provides many snacks, as well as a richer nutritious breakfast."

This kind of physical exam requires fasting and little water, meaning you need an empty stomach, so even the lowest-tier package provides breakfast after the exam; it's just that cheaper packages might only have steamed buns, soy milk, and eggs.

"And this is our health gift pack and souvenir, inside there's our Ci Jian thermos cup, disinfection kit, health handbook, etc.

Of course, carrying the physical exam 【items】 isn't suitable; if Mr. Lin doesn't mind, you can temporarily leave them at the front desk and take them when you leave."

Zhang Ke Wu pointed at the large bag the front desk brought up to display, introducing it to Lin Li.

"Okay okay, thank you." For such enthusiastic staff, Lin Li even felt a bit unaccustomed.

This is what a rich person's life is called a life.

Seeing Lin Li's introduction finally end, Bai Bufan had long been impatient; he shoved aside that damn VIP Lin Li in one push, and handed his own ID card to the front desk.

"My turn, my turn!" Bai Bufan rubbed his hands in anticipation like a fly.

"Are you Mr. Bai?" The front desk confirmed after checking the information.

"That's right. Also, I don't need one-on-one accompaniment either." Bai Bufan nodded and waved his hand, saying it in advance.

"Okay, this is your examination form, this way." The front desk smiled and nodded upon hearing this, took out the examination form, placed it in front of Bai Bufan, and gestured that he could go in.

Bai Bufan: "..."

Bai Bufan pressed his hand over his upper lip, brows knitted tight, and after hesitating and clicking his tongue twice, he spoke:

"Sis, although I don't need an escort, the procedures you VIPs are supposed to go through — well, you could still run through them, right? No need to be this cursory, is there?"

"The souvenirs, the VIP cards — I might actually need those, why not ask me first?"

Receptionist: "Alright, this is your check-up slip, this way please."

Bai Bufan: "?"

"I need an escort! Sis! I need a dedicated one-on-one consultant escort! Get my consultant to see me!" Bai Bufan flipped his stance in an instant, panic rising.

"Mr. Bai, very sorry, but you aren't a VIP." The receptionist said apologetically.

Eh?

Bai Bufan blinked, then whipped his head around to look at Lin Li.

Lin Li met his gaze with an innocent look.

"Lin Li, what check-up package did you get?"

"The most expensive one."

"What check-up package did I get?"

"Same as mine."

"Where's it the same?"

"The check-up institution is the same."

"What about the price?"

"Not quite the same."

"How much not the same?"

"The cheapest one."

The two of them, right in front of the consultant and the receptionist, carried on an extraordinarily calm and slow back-and-forth.

The receptionist and the consultant, for some reason, found themselves wanting to laugh listening to it.

Both of them were too calm.

But this calm was merely the harbinger before the storm.

"Lin Li!! You son of a bitch!" Bai Bufan lunged forward and clambered onto Lin Li's back, then slid down and started throttling Lin Li's neck: "You brought me along, turns out it wasn't out of the goodness of your heart — you were planning to recruit a dog slave to order around, huh!"

Lin Li chuckled: "Nothing like that, why would I waste that money? I regret it myself, and your basic package isn't cheap either, several hundred bucks. If you really want it, the consultant and souvenirs and all that I'll give them to you, I wasn't interested anyway."

Lin Li had bought the expensive package back then for the dedicated customer service, the freely schedulable time, and the "confidential delivery".

It really wasn't about chasing those premium-priced services.

Save where you should, spend where you should.

"Just kidding, no need no need, bro's not the sort to hold a grudge over a meal." Bai Bufan let go at once on hearing that, shrugging indifferently, "I just suspected you deliberately didn't tell me so you could wait and watch me make a fool of myself."

Lin Li nodded: "Mm."

Bai Bufan: "?"

See, his throttling of Lin Li's neck wasn't for nothing.

"But the treatment for having money and not having money really is different. Before long I'll be sixteen and can work, then I'll see if I can find a part-time job, I'll rely on my own two hands to become a new rich bro!" Bai Bufan hooked his arm around Lin Li's shoulder, striding into the facility, fighting spirit high.

"Being a millionaire is no problem, I saw on the news someone went to work in a factory and got one hand mangled by a machine malfunction, the factory paid out five hundred thousand, you've got two hands, a million easy." Lin Li was very bullish on Bai Bufan.

Bai Bufan: "(；o_o)?"

"Not relying on one-time-use hands! I want the sustainable development kind!" Bai Bufan laughed and cursed.

"There is, Bufan, I've got a super attractive gig on hand, want me to save it for you?" Lin Li asked on hearing that.

"You say."

"Shoveling manure, fifty a day, don't rush to say the job's trash." Lin Li lowered his voice here, pulled Bai Bufan's head over, "This doesn't leave this room, the referrer told me — you can sneak bites."

Bai Bufan's eyes went wide at that, and he immediately lowered his voice too, asking seriously and tensely: "Sure there's no surveillance? Don't want me sneaking bites and then they check the footage and dock my fifty bucks clean."

"Really isn't."

"Then you absolutely have to save it for me!"

"Hahahaha!" Lin Li laughed loudly, slapping Bai Bufan's back hard, "Come on, off to the check-up!"

Why he could be this close with Bai Bufan — it was because a buddy on the same wavelength who was willing to go crazy with you was simply too rare.

Having a bro like this was truly a fortunate thing.

All one can say is: not asking to be born same year same month same day, but asking that on some year some month some day he dies first.

Just inside the door, the first department was general examination.

— That is, the most basic checks like height, weight, blood pressure, and pulse.

Because this examination was quick, basically no one queued.

The honored VIP Lin Li went a step ahead of Bai Bufan, took off his shoes, stepped onto the height-weight machine, and the results came out fast.

"186.3, how come in over half a year I've grown less than half a centimeter, wouldn't my height have pretty much locked in right here?" Ignoring the weight, looking at his height data, Lin Li felt some regret.

Last measurement was half a year ago, 186 even, meaning in half a year he'd only grown 0.3.

Why doesn't the system give me a stretch, does it think 186 is enough already?

In first year of high school that was extremely tall, in South Sang High's first year only one person was taller than Lin Li.

But by the standard of age eighteen, in modern times where most people have excessive nutrition, 186 counts as tall, but not especially tall.

Could it be that by third year he'll have to look up to Bai Bufan, this kind of thing calls for tonic medicine ah.

"Hope you shrink, turn into a genuine 179." Putting his shoes back on, sitting in place and starting to measure blood pressure, Lin Li looked at Bai Bufan and prayed.

Since he couldn't elevate himself, might as well drag others down.

"A good-for-nothing old thing getting desperate too." Bai Bufan sneered on hearing that.

Afterwards Bai Bufan took off his shoes, but his complexion changed slightly, his smile fading a little.

Lin Li, leaning to the side with his blood pressure being taken, had nothing to do and watched Bai Bufan step onto the height-and-weight machine, noticing his big toe clenching hard on something, so he asked in puzzlement, "Bufan, what are your toes clamping onto?"

Bai Bufan pretended not to hear and stood on the machine.

But the doctor beside the machine responsible for recording data, hearing this, also noticed the point, patted Bai Bufan's shoulder, and prompted:

"Young man, measuring height like this won't be accurate; what are you clamping, loosen it."

Bai Bufan: "..."

Bai Bufan bit his lip with his teeth, finally let out a "heh" laugh, he helplessly averted his gaze toward the doorway while simultaneously loosening his toes.

Thereupon a hole appeared before Lin Li and the doctor.

At this moment, Bai Bufan's desolate voice drifted over, ethereal and helpless:

"What am I clamping?"

"It's my dignity ah tat."

(End of chapter)